March makes me restless and impatient, sharp and irritable.
That year was no different.
My hospital was a research hospital. That gave me the option of working in the labs, researching instead of practising. There are no mucky grey zones in the labs – a new drug is effective or it isn’t – and that polarity always worked for me.
I had a bit of a reputation on the wards, where I would be called in as a specialist on the tough cases. ‘Icicle’ Taylor cut to the chase, took risks, won more than she lost. Each case, for me, was an array of statistics, a flotilla of blood test results, and I chose the armaments with which I would engage based upon experience and the sum of results to date. I never wanted to know the patient – that was just extraneous detail. I never wanted to familiarize myself with the territory in dispute.
I just wanted to win.
But that March, one patient wasn’t having any of that. Mrs Curtis was in her forties and had a wry smile. She refused to let me slide in and out of her life without making a connection. She continued to insist that I call her by her first name, for example, even though I never did. She always wanted a conversation when I slipped in to check her charts or progress. She introduced me to her family and friends. There are many points of contact in an aggressive routine of chemotherapy and radiation, and Mrs Curtis put every one to work in her effort to charm me.
In a way, she waged her own campaign against my clinical detachment while I fought the disease that had invaded her body.
She had one advantage she never realized and it was the one that made the difference – she looked like my mother. She was taller and more buxom, but that glint in her eye, that ability to see right through my carefully composed lines to what I really meant, was my mother back from the grave. It caught at my heart, ripped a hole in my composure, and exposed a small vulnerability.
So, I was even more determined than usual to ensure that Mrs Curtis was a triumph. My mother, you see, had lost her battle right before my eyes. Mrs Curtis was my chance to prove that I wasn’t some helpless twelve-year-old forced to stand aside and watch while her life disintegrated before her eyes.
Mrs Curtis was a territory I intended to win back from the enemy, one cell at a time.
And that’s why I was back at the hospital close to midnight that night, on the way home from a date that I hadn’t wanted to keep. It had been a double date, set up by a friend despairing of my “perverse affection” for solitude, and it had been a disaster. They all were. He’d been nice enough, but not nearly as fascinating as the mutating opponent I met in the lab every single day. And he didn’t understand what it was to be passionate about anything – other than football and sex. I’d tapped my fingers on the table and smiled thinly throughout the meal.
We were probably all relieved when the cheque came.
I’d immediately gone back to the hospital to look over the most recent bout of test results, just to make sure I hadn’t missed anything. I knew I hadn’t, I never do, but it gave me the excuse to look in on Mrs Curtis again.
She was probably awake. We shared a kind of insomnia, a restlessness in the middle of the night that only conversation cured. She had a private room, so I knew I wouldn’t be troubling anyone else.
I needed to talk to her about doing another biopsy anyway. The last had been painful, deeper than anticipated. I’d feared that the subsequent radiation would finish her before the cancer did. But Mrs Curtis had rallied, as she always did.
So, unfortunately, had my determined foe – the cancer.
The ward was quiet. I’ve always preferred the hospital at night. During the day, it can be fraught with emotional energy, people demanding answers and desperate to do something to help. I’d never done well with that kind of anxiety.
I was always better with test results, percentages, calculations, cold hard maths. Winter, if you will – relentless but consistent, instead of the capricious and fleeting charm of spring.
In the quiet darkness, the hospital was more pure in its function. Monitors beeped and intravenous tubes dripped. The machines ran the show, which worked for me. Patients slept. Visitors had left. Gurneys were moved as the dead journeyed quietly down to the morgue. The nurses focused on the checking of patients and keeping records.
I savoured the dimness of the lights and the emptiness of the lobby as I crossed the threshold that night. I was looking forward to seeing Mrs Curtis too, even with the discussion ahead of us. The elevator came immediately and, in the comparative silence, I heard the whirr of its mechanism as I stood alone in it.
I nodded to the night nurse, Miriam, one of the most watchful and competent of the nursing team. I hesitated outside Mrs Curtis’s room, my steps frozen at the sound of voices.
She had a guest.
How could that be?
I looked at my watch. It was almost midnight. Outrage rose within me that anyone would disturb a patient as she healed, but then Mrs Curtis laughed.
It was a different laugh than the one I usually heard in her presence. Low. Breathy. Sexy.
“I can’t dance now!” she protested in a tone of voice that indicated she’d like to be persuaded otherwise.
“Of course you can,” a man insisted. His voice was low and rich, a murmur that made me shiver.
“The IV . . . ”
“We’ll ignore it.”
“But there’s no music,” Mrs Curtis argued, her tone light.
Flirtatious.
Did Mrs Curtis have a lover? She’d never mentioned it, but then I made a point of not asking after personal details. I knew nothing about her life and, until this moment, that had suited me just fine. I peeked around the edge of the door, curious.
There was a man on the far side of Mrs Curtis’s bed, standing with his back to the window. He had dark hair and dark eyes, and seemed to be younger than Mrs Curtis. He was handsome, handsome enough to make me yearn for something I hadn’t had in a long time. He was wearing a black leather jacket, black jeans and a black T-shirt. A silver earring gleamed from his left ear lobe. No pretty boy – he was older, knowing, a little bit world-weary.
Sexy.
Familiar.
Although I knew I’d never seen him before.
Mrs Curtis had braced herself on one elbow, her hair a tangle of silver and russet on the back of her neck. Her skin was pale and she was thinner than I’d realized. The back of her hospital gown was open, and I was shocked at how clearly the individual vertebrae were delineated. The IV in her right hand looked enormous in comparison to her delicate hands.
“Isn’t there?” he asked, his smile broadening. He had a sensual mouth, a full and mobile one, and his smile looked positively decadent. I couldn’t identify his accent, but it was European. Exotic.
And then I heard the waltz. It seemed as if an orchestra had struck up in the ward, although that made no sense. The music lilted through the room, barely audible to me in the doorway, but achingly beautiful.
Mrs Curtis was laughing at the man, who watched her as if she was the most beautiful woman in the world. A lump rose in my throat at his kindness.
Or maybe the state of his infatuation.
“How did you do that?” she demanded.
“Does it matter? Or should we simply dance?” He offered his hand to her, palm up, and I was struck by how tiny her right hand looked when she placed it in his. How wrong that IV needle looked in the back of her hand, with its three strips of tape.
I had never seen Mrs Curtis healthy.
I had never before heard her laugh.
“OK,” she agreed, conspiratorial. “Let’s dance.”
He gathered her in his arms, bodily lifting her from the bed. My mouth went dry at the tenderness in his expression. She was all bones and pale skin, a rag doll, a wisp of the woman she must have been.
She slid her hands up to his shoulders, rapturous in his embrace. He smiled down at her, loving, possessive, gentle.
She laid her head on his shoulder and sighed. I saw her e
yes close. I saw the glimmer of a tear on her cheek. She looked so fragile and faded, like a rose left in a vase too long. I thought he was going to kiss her and I knew I should look away.
But his gaze suddenly locked on mine.
That one glance stopped my heart cold. I was caught.
But there was no surprise in his expression: he’d known all along that I was there. That realization shook me, rooted me, made it impossible for me to move.
He knew me as well as I knew him.
Impossible.
He had smouldering dark eyes, eyes filled with a thousand shadows, eyes that seemed to see straight through to my heart. His hair was long, tied back; his features could have been sculpted out of marble. But his dark eyes, his eyes saw so much.
More than I allowed anyone to see. I wanted to avert my gaze, to hide. I saw the glimmer of a smile, as if he were amused by me.
Then he bent his head and sank his teeth into Mrs Curtis’ neck. Mrs Curtis gasped and arched her neck, as if in pleasure, then laid her cheek upon his shoulder in surrender.
I knew that my eyes had to be deceiving me. There were no vampires in real life.
But the blood was flowing, easing from the corner of the stranger’s mouth to slide down Mrs Curtis’ fair skin. The rivulet was red against her pale flesh, and he drank steadily. The music soared and swirled as I gaped at them, then I saw her fingers go slack on his shoulder.
That made me move.
“Stop it!” I almost flew across the room, intending to pull him bodily away.
He stole one last massive gulp, then straightened. By the time I crossed the room, he’d laid Mrs Curtis back in her bed with that remarkable tenderness. He was a good foot taller than me, broad and imposing, but I shoved past him in my haste.
He stepped gracefully aside, as if he’d meant to move all along. I bent over Mrs Curtis, checking her monitors and her IV, placing my fingers under her chin.
Her pulse was weak, irregular, but still there.
The music, the lilting music that seemed to have drifted from another world, faded to nothing. I doubted I had even heard it in the first place.
“It’s too late,” the stranger said quietly. At close proximity, I was even more aware of his potent voice. It was more than low – it was languid. Melted chocolate on fruit.
Dark chocolate.
Tropical fruit.
I could feel the heat of him beside me, feel his scrutiny, almost hear his pulse. He was flesh and blood, like me, not an illusion.
Not a fable.
Before I could decide that my eyes had deceived me, I saw the proof: there were two perfectly round punctures in Mrs Curtis’ throat.
He was a vampire.
I sputtered, far from my usual coherence. “How could you do this? Who are you?”
His smile broadened, but there was a tinge of sadness in his eyes. I had the sense that he knew more than I did, but I was too angry to care. “My name is Micah,” he said softly.
Mrs Curtis’ pulse faltered beneath my fingers and I forgot his alluring gaze. I reached past him and slapped the alarm button for Miriam. “We need an infusion, Miriam, stat,” I said, not waiting for her query.
She knew where I was and would call up the blood type.
The stranger, meanwhile, had stepped around the end of the bed. He leaned over Mrs Curtis and, before I could stop him, touched her throat gently with his fingertips. The gesture was reverent, that of a lover saying farewell.
When he lifted his hand, those two round holes were gone.
As if they’d never been there.
I blinked and stared, but the flesh was perfect.
I had seen them, though. I had seen what he had done.
Mrs Curtis sighed and her head fell to one side. The pulse monitor began to sound an alarm.
Everything happened quickly then: Miriam arrived with the blood and we worked together, two other nurses following instructions. Mrs Curtis’ vitals rapidly went from bad to worse. Her pulse rate slowed and became erratic. Her breathing became more laboured, rattling in her throat, her skin became paler. Nothing we did made a difference. Miriam was the perfect partner, both of us knowing exactly what had to be done when.
But it was too late.
My hands were on her scarred chest when Mrs Curtis’ heart stopped right beneath my palms. I would have kept trying, but Miriam touched my shoulder.
“There’s no point, Dr Taylor,” she said quietly, and even knowing she was right, it was hard to lift my hands away.
This battle had been more important to me, although they all were critical. I blinked back unexpected tears as Miriam pulled the sheet over Mrs Curtis’ face. The two other nurses left quietly and I took a shaking breath. I turned away from the sight of Mrs Curtis’ still figure.
I’d lost.
The night was inky black beyond the windows, a perfect echo of my mood.
No. I hadn’t lost. I’d been cheated.
By Micah.
I spun, finding Miriam halfway to the door. “That man, Miriam, did you see him? Where did he go?”
Miriam gave me a quizzical look. “What man, Dr Taylor?”
“Mrs Curtis’ visitor; you couldn’t have missed him. You must have passed him on your way in here with the blood.”
She frowned. “I didn’t see anyone but staff tonight.”
“Maybe he works here.” I shrugged. “He was with Mrs Curtis when I arrived, talking to her. He was tall and dark, about thirty-five, leather jacket and long dark hair . . . ” I faltered to silence as I realized Miriam had no idea who I was talking about.
“I think I’d remember a man like that,” Miriam said with a smile. “Are you sure, Dr Taylor?”
I glanced back at Mrs Curtis again. I knew what I had seen. Why hadn’t Miriam seen him? I remembered the way he had made the marks of his feasting disappear, and bit my tongue.
No one would believe that I’d seen a vampire.
And I wasn’t going to ask Miriam about bats in the ward.
Miriam crossed the floor, her shoe soles squeaking on the linoleum. She touched my elbow briefly and I started in surprise. No one ever touched me, especially not at work. “Time to go, Dr Taylor.” She gestured to the door and I knew she was right. Lingering wouldn’t change anything.
“I’ll call her family,” Miriam said kindly when we were in the hall.
“Does she have a partner?”
“A sister. I have the number. I’ll tell her how hard you tried.” Miriam studied me, then smiled. “Go home, Dr Taylor, go home and get some sleep.”
I was confused by her compassion. “I’m fine. I’ll go down to the lab . . . ”
She exhaled sharply and looked stern. “I understand that you did rounds at seven this morning, and now it’s almost midnight.”
There was frost hanging from every word of my response. “I always work long hours.” And they were no one’s business but mine.
“But you don’t always see people who aren’t there, Dr Taylor, do you?”
I could have argued that the stranger had been there, that I knew what I had seen, but I saw that Miriam wouldn’t be persuaded. I nodded an acknowledgment, thanked her and returned to the elevator.
But I didn’t go home.
I went to the cafeteria and nursed a coffee from the vending machine, reviewing everything I had done, seeking the error in my judgment. I always do this kind of examination, always try to improve my strategy.
I’d done nothing wrong.
I just hadn’t allowed for vampires in my statistical analysis.
Vampires. Maybe there was something to Miriam’s concern. Maybe I had been pushing myself too hard. I was tired, there was no disputing that.
But how can anyone sleep when the battle is so relentless? Cancer never sleeps and it takes advantage of every weakness. It would win, maybe even while I was sleeping, and I couldn’t let that happen. There already weren’t enough hours in the day.
It was getting light when I ditched the c
old coffee, then left the hospital. If nothing else, I’d shower and change my clothes at home before returning for morning rounds. I tried to swallow the lump in my throat to keep from looking back to Mrs Curtis’ room. I ignored the cars of my co-workers pulling into their parking spaces.
I was halfway across the lot when I saw the stranger leaning against the front fender of my car.
Waiting.
For me.
He had that amused smile again, which was more than enough to set me off.
I was across the parking lot in record time, fury and exhaustion making me more volatile than usual. “You killed her!”
The stranger didn’t move away from my anger. He leaned one hip against my car, his arms folded across his chest. He was dark and large and could have been carved from stone.
No, he could have been sculpted from stone. He was beautiful, his dark eyes thickly lashed, his mouth sensuously curved. I felt an awareness of him and our proximity, an awareness I resented.
He was a predator, a murderer, a vampire. He might as well have been on the enemy side.
Micah. It was a name that suited him. Just a little bit different. Unexpected. Old and strong.
I glared at him. “You did, didn’t you?”
He inclined his head slightly. “Yes.” He moved slowly, elegantly, every gesture thoughtful. He closed his eyes briefly, his features touched with a sadness I didn’t understand.
“How could you do that?”
“I have to feed.”
“Isn’t there someone else you could kill? A criminal or a wild animal? Someone who deserves to die?”
“Everyone will die, deserving or not.”
“But she was going to live. I was winning . . . ”
“Maybe she’s at peace now.”
“No. She’s dead now.”
He was amused again. “Not in heaven?”
I was as impatient with this idea as ever. My father and I had argued this up, down and sideways and I knew my position well. “There is no heaven and there is no hell. There is life and there is death and everything else is just romance.”
“Just romance?”
“There’s no point in self-delusion. Get away from my car.”
Love Bites UK (Mammoth Book Of Vampire Romance2) Page 6
