by Trejo, Erin
When he finally slows his horse to a trot, I do the same. Gentry comes to a stop and jumps down from his horse as I watch him. When I’m close enough, I do as well. Walking closer to him, I see him staring off in the distance.
“That is beautiful,” I whisper when I come to stand next to him. We look out over the large pond that sits at the back of his parent’s property. I’ve always known it was here, but I never came out to see it. Fireflies dance over the water like little pixie fairies. The reflection of their light casting a glow that bounces off the surface of the water into the air.
“I’ve never seen anything like this,” I say softly. Gentry reaches over, threading his fingers with mine and holding them tightly. It’s such a little thing, but it causes warmth to seep through my body. I love having him touching me, being close to me. I don’t think I ever stopping loving and missing it all these years.
“The Chinese once thought that fireflies were burning grass. They would catch them and keep them in jars, using them as lanterns. The Japanese legend though, thought they were the souls of the dead. There’s a little magic history in them too,” he says, his eyes trained out at the water.
“What’s the magic?”
“They say that if you’re feeling lost, you can catch the fireflies in a jar. Ask them to light the way for you, to show you the path you need to go down then release them from the jar.”
“That’s beautiful.” Gentry nods and pulls his hand from mine. He reaches into his pocket and pulls out two small jars, passing me one. I take it in my hand and stare at the small piece of glass before I look up and ask, “What are we doing?”
“Catching the magic. Some days I think I’m lost and I don’t know what way to go. Some I know my fate. Today is one of those I’m not so sure about. I think we could both use a little magic, don’t you?” He looks over at me when I nod and smile. His eyes are so bright, even in the dark of the night. “Take the lid off,” he says nodding toward my jar. I do as I’m told and then follow him as he walks closer to the water. Watching him wave the jar through the air and catch fireflies melts my heart. This man, this strong tough man is out here showing me of all people how to catch a bit of magic.
“Come on, city girl. They aren’t just going to fly in there for you.” When he winks, my heart soars. I hold my jar in the air just like he did and watch as I collect the bugs. When I have enough I put my lid back on and wait for Gentry.
“Now, whisper your words to them,” he says right before leaning in and whispering to his jar. I giggle a little but he just smiles at me. I bring the jar to my lips and whisper my heart out when I see Gentry releasing his.
“What did you tell them?”
“Can’t tell you that or they won’t guide me,” he says firmly. I open the lid and shake my jar, watching as they fly out and light up the night. Strangely my heart feels at peace.
“What do you think? Think this is going to work?” I ask, passing him his jar back.
“Keep it. You might want to do it again sometime. And I don’t know. This is the first time I’ve done it,” he admits.
“What do you mean? You’ve never come out here to do this before?” I ask confused. Surely that is a lie. He looked like he’d done it a million times.
“No. I wanted to do it with you.”
His words are like a brick to the stomach. I gasp and open my mouth but before any words can form, Gentry is there. His lips cover mine in a heated kiss that has my knees weak. One of his hands comes to hold the back of my neck, the other around my waist, pulling me closer to him. I reach up, letting my hands rest on his muscled arms. His tongue sweeps my mouth and I moan into him. Gentry grinds against me and I can’t stop the sounds coming from my lips. His kiss slows to a torturing pace that has me wanting more. So much more. If things were different, if we weren’t so opposite, I could see myself loving him. I know it’s wrong, I know I have to get some kind of closure with Lance but this is different. Gentry is everything the world isn’t. The sound of my phone ringing brings our kiss to a halt. Gentry pulls away and stares at my swollen lips.
“You should get that,” he nods toward my pocket. I’m a mess of emotions and feelings and things I shouldn’t be, but I nod my head and pull my phone from my pocket and answer it.
“Uhh, hello?”
Gentry smirks knowing he’s the one that has my brain fried.
“Where are you?”
“What do you mean?”
“I’m here, Hope. At the ranch. Where are you?”
“What do you mean you’re here? You can’t be here! You’re in California!” I squeal. Gentry’s smile turns to concern as he moves toward me, resting his hand on my arm. I jerk away from him and run back toward the horses. I can’t believe he’s here.
“I needed to talk to you. Face to face, Hope. I love you.”
Vomit burns the back of my throat as I mount the horse. Gentry does the same. I don’t know why but I don’t want him to follow me. Maybe it’s denial. Maybe it’s fear. I don’t know but I wish he wasn’t with me right now.
“I’m coming. Give me a few minutes.” I hang up quickly and slide the phone in my pocket before heading back toward the house. I know Gentry is behind me, I can feel his presence. Not that I want that to go away, I don’t, but now I have to face Lance with Gentry here, too? It feels like all too much all at once.
My stomach tumbles as I ride. As soon as the house comes into view, I debate turning back and running, but I know I have to be the adult here. I have to handle this. I knew at some point Lance would want to talk. We left things unresolved. Even though I read him the riot act, I knew deep down that Lance wouldn’t accept it as the end. That’s not him.
When I climb off the horse I pass the reigns to the girl working in the stables before bolting toward the house. Out of breath and frankly scared out of my mind, I come to a stop when I see him standing there. He looks perfect, just like always. But that perfection doesn’t look so perfect any more.
“Hope. You look… Well, you’re dirty.”
I glance down at my clothes and see they are indeed dirty but I’ve been riding with Gentry.
“What are you doing here?” I ask near breathlessly from my jog to the house.
“We need to talk,” Lance says holding his hand out to me. Just then Gentry walks up next to me, slipping his arm around my shoulder.
“What’s going on here?” he asks smoothly. I know what he’s doing and I don’t like it.
“Who are you?” Lance moves his gaze to Gentry. He pulls his arm from my shoulders and extends his hand to Lance. This is going to end badly, I can feel it.
“Gentry Weston.”
“Lance Peters.”
“Peters, huh? Heard all about that,” Gentry tells him as my mouth falls open. He did not just say that! Oh, who am I kidding, if it’s sexual, Gentry said it.
“Excuse me?”
“Nothing. What are you doing here, Lance?” I step in between them. Lance eyes Gentry a second longer before he drags his gaze to mine. Grabbing both my hands in his he looks into my eyes.
“I know I messed up, Hope, and I’m sorry but I love you. I miss you and…well…” He goes down on one knee and my chest deflates. He can’t be doing this. Not here. Not now. How can he do this to me after he cheated?
9
Gentry
He’s doing this right here? Right now? In front of me? This man must be an idiot. He has Hope’s hands in his as he bends down on one knee. Hope looks like she’s going to be sick or stop breathing all together. I’m about to walk away when she moves.
“Snake!” She screams and leaps into my arms. Luckily I catch the little flying squirrel before she damn near climbs my body once more. She’s hanging off my neck screaming until my ears feel like they’re bleeding.
“What?” Lance stands glancing around until he spots it. Then he screams much like Hope did.
“Oh my God! Snake! There’s a snake!” he yells sounding like a little girl.
I
can’t help but laugh. Mom comes out the front door, looking between the three of us and down at the snake.
“It’s just a Night Snake,” she informs them. I can’t stop laughing as Hope tries to climb higher.
“It’s just a snake, Hope,” I remind her.
“Oh, yeah, just like that man-eating tarantula was just a little spider!” she screams loudly.
“They won’t hurt you, sweetheart,” my mom says as she grabs her broom and shoos the snake away. The sight before me is downright amusing.
“It’s gone. Why don’t we come inside,” Mom offers.
I don’t want this man in my house. I don’t want him anywhere near me or Hope for that matter. I look to my mom and see the somber look in her eyes. Nodding my head, I know what I have to do. I try to lower Hope to her feet, but she’s clinging to me like I’m her lifeline.
“If I didn’t know any better, I’d think you like climbing me, Hope,” I whisper in her ear. She looks at me, pink cheeks and all before sliding down my body. I can’t stop the groan and I don’t even try as her body presses into mine.
“Um, yeah, Lance do you want to come inside?” Hope asks him making my jaw clench. He nods and I think he moves faster than Hope at this point to get in there. I watch the two of them as they walk up the steps and into my mom’s house. My house. Scrubbing my hand over my face, I’m not going in there for this shit. Turning on my heel, I head down to the barn for some much needed space. When I get there, I climb the steps to the small apartment that Dawson stays in, knocking on the door.
“Hey, what’s going on?” he asks when he opens the door.
“Mind if I hang out here for a while?” He shakes his head and moves to the side allowing me to step in.
“This have anything to do with that fancy car in the driveway?”
“Yeah. That’s Hope’s boyfriend from California.”
“The cheater?”
I smirk. “That would be the one. He was about to propose to her.” With a sigh, I drop onto the couch and lay my head back.
“Wow. That’s… I don’t know what to say about that. You okay?” he asks concerned.
“No but I have to be. Hope isn’t mine. She doesn’t belong to me.”
“I don’t know about all that,” he says.
“What do you mean?”
Dawson walks over and grabs some beers from the refrigerator, passing me one before taking a seat in the chair. “I see you two together, Gentry. She cares about you.”
“We have a past,” I remind him as he nods.
“I know that too. I also know you never got over her, not completely anyhow. Tell her, tell her what you feel.”
I take a long pull of my beer and shake my head. Pulling my hat off, I drop it onto the couch before running my hand through my hair. I don’t know why this hurts so much. We aren’t together. Not in that sense. So why does it feel like she’s ripping my heart out of my chest like the first time she left? I couldn’t handle it then and I don’t think I can do it now. It broke my heart.
“Can’t do that. I won’t get in the way of them, Dawson.”
“Would you rather watch her walk away again? Because from what I can remember that didn’t go over so well either.” He’s right and I know he is. “Look, you can crash here if you want to. I’m heading to bed. Night.”
I nod and salute him with my bottle before grabbing another. It doesn’t take long for me to drink myself to sleep. Little does that help. All the dreams are of her.
“Gentry, come on,” she says softly. I can feel her hands on my chest as she slowly pushes on me.
“Hope. Don’t do this to me,” I grumble under my breath.
“I’m not. Wake up and talk to me. Please.” My dream seems so vivid. I can almost see her, feel her.
“Don’t make me look at the one thing I can’t have,” I say softly to the voice that’s haunting me in my dreams.
“Gentry Weston, open your damn eyes!”
Wow, that seemed so real. Prying my eyes open I’m shocked to see that it was real. Hope stands in front of me, a small smile on her face.
“What are you doing here?” I ask her.
“We need to talk.”
“If you’re engaged I don’t want to know about it unless I’m your one fling before you get married,” I say knowing she would never do that but I wiggle my eyebrows at her anyway. What can I say, humor is my defense mechanism.
“Get up and come outside with me.”
I shrug and clear my throat, shoving off the couch and heading for the door. Stumbling a little down the steps, I inhale the night air. Just as I turn to see where she is, she slams into me. I catch her in my arms, wrapping them around her waist. Her legs go around me, her lips crashing into mine. Her kiss is hot and heated. Her body grinds against me and I groan. I walk us toward the house before it all hits me.
“I can’t do this,” I tell her, pulling back a little.
“He’s gone. I made him leave.”
“For good?” I ask leaning down and kissing her neck. She made him leave. He’s gone. That alone keeps playing in my head. She told him to leave.
“For good,” she whispers when I suck the flesh of her neck into my mouth.
“I want you, Hope. I’ve wanted you since the day at the funeral.”
“You have me, Gentry. You always have.”
Moving my mouth back to hers, I kiss her until neither of us can breathe. I walk us into the house and down the hallway to my room, kicking the door closed behind me. I move us to the bed where I lay her down gently. She looks up at me as I slowly begin to remove my clothes. Each piece hits the floor as she moves to take off her own. My eyes travel over her body, the body that I’ve wanted for so long. My dick has never been this hard before, and as I climb on the edge of the bed, she slowly spreads her legs wide for me. I lean down, taking her mouth with mine once more as I reach between us and position myself where I need to be. Slowly I push into her, listening to her moan. Each roll of my hips, she makes some sort of noise that spurs me on. Electricity races through my veins like the hottest fire I’ve ever felt. Her fingers are like silk as they trail over my skin. Each time I thrust into her I feel another piece of myself coming together.
“Hope,” I groan her name not knowing what to do with myself. I’ve dreamt of this moment, of being with her and only her.
“Gentry. I love you,” she cries out as her orgasm rips through her. I shudder from her words and come with her as I slowly kiss her neck. When I pull out of her, she whines and I chuckle. I lie down next to her, pulling her into my arms and holding her as we both catch our breath.
“Did you mean it?” I ask her gently as I run my hand up and down her back.
“I’ve always loved you, Gentry. You were everything to me back then.”
“You left me.”
“I couldn’t say goodbye to you. Do you know how hard that was for me?”
“I know. I don’t think I’d ever want to say goodbye to you either.”
Hope
My chest is tight as I glance over the files that Myra emailed me. I can’t believe it. I can’t believe what I’m seeing. My night was perfect. Everything was perfect. I meant what I said to Gentry, I think I’ve always loved him somewhere deep down, and now this?
“You’re up early, city girl,” he grumbles next to me where I sit on his bed with my laptop in hand.
“I had a few emails to send off. Did you sleep well?” I ask him. He nods and rolls over to pull me back into him. His head rests in my lap as I set my laptop off to the side.
“I don’t think I’ve slept that well in a very long time,” he says in a groggy tone. I run my fingers through his hair and he sighs. His warm breath dances over my naked skin when I realize he fell back asleep. Staring down at him, I can’t believe any of this. I’m here with him. In his bed. I never thought that this would be my life, but I’m finding that I want to be with him more and more. My cell rings on the table next to me and I quickly grab it. I snuck
out of his room to grab my things not knowing how long he’d be asleep.
“Did you get the email? I can’t believe this! Has he said anything to you?” Myra screams into the line.
“I can’t either. No, he hasn’t said a word,” I whisper into the line.
“Oh my God. Are you with him right now?” I sigh and rest my head on the headboard.
“I’m going to talk to him, Myra. I am.”
“Oh girl. I don’t know what to say here.”
“How did you find out anyway? I couldn’t find a thing,” I say.
“I paid off my lawyer to do some deep digging. Don’t ask, it may have gotten a little physical,” she says through a giggle.
“I’ll call you soon.” Hanging up the phone, I grab my laptop and balance it at an awkward angle and start typing. Eventually Gentry rolls back onto his pillow and I really get to work. The words flow, the names, the faces, everything. In no time I have a three page spread typed up and put together. When I glance at the time I gasp.
“Gentry.” I nudge him.
“Hmm?”
“It’s after one in the afternoon!”
“So?”
“So? Don’t you have work to do?”
“Not today. Told Dawson I was busy,” he says rolling over and nuzzling back into me. I set my laptop to the side and slide back down the bed next to him.
“Why can’t life always be like this?” I whisper knowing that I have to confront him about this. He lied to me. He didn’t tell me anything and he knew I was looking.
“It can, baby. It can always be like this. Just…stay with me, Hope. I can make you happy. I can give you the world,” he whispers as he presses his lips to the side of my head. I take a deep breath ready to say something but I can’t. I want to stay like this if only for a little longer.
