by Laura Howard
“We’ll be watching to make sure your entire family stays safe,” he continued without missing a beat. “But if I do contact you at your grandparents’ again, please understand that it's important.”
“Wait, what do you mean ‘we’?”
Liam looked away, and when he looked back at me, his eyes pleaded with me to understand. Ethan was walking across the lawn, looking from Liam to me with a concerned expression.
“Ethan, your family's home is stunning,” Liam said. “Thank you so much for inviting me today, but I’m afraid I must be going.”
“All right, man. Talk with you soon.” Ethan glanced down at me, a question still in his eyes.
“Allison, lovely to see you again,” Liam added with a nod.
I watched him walk away, every muscle in my body thrumming with tension.
“You don’t like him much, do you?” Ethan asked, watching me as if gauging my reaction.
“I don’t even know him,” I replied. Okay, I needed a change of subject. “Are they almost ready for the fireworks?”
“I think so. Keep your fingers crossed that they know what they’re doing.”
I laughed at Jeff and Sean across the yard, fighting over a box of matches. Ethan muttered something under his breath, and I turned to see Rachel sauntering over to us.
“Such a great party, Ethan,” Rachel sputtered, taking a sip of her wine cooler.
“I’m glad you’re having a good time, Rach.”
Rachel giggled, batting her heavily made-up lashes at Ethan. “Is it just me, or is it starting to get a bit chilly?”
“I brought a sweatshirt, so I’m fine,” I said, pointing to the sweatshirt I’d wrapped around my waist.
“Oh, you’re so smart, All-i-son,” Rachel stammered. “Do you have a sweatshirt I could borrow, Ethan? I’m getting goose bumps all over.” She held her arm up to Ethan’s face.
She was such an annoying drunk.
“Yeah, sure. I’ll see what I can find,” he said, grabbing my hand and pulling me behind him.
“You all right?” he asked, his eyes scanning my face. “You seem upset.”
“I’m fine.” I tried to smile, but I knew my voice sounded shaky.
“I think I have one of Sean’s old sweatshirts up in my room. She can have that,” he said as he led me through the house.
“So, are they back together?” I asked him as we walked up the stairs to the second floor.
Ethan snorted. “Sean and Rach? Who knows? Who cares?”
He paused just inside his bedroom door and turned to look at me. His face was scrunched in concern. “What is it, Al?”
“Nothing. I was just thinking about something Rachel said to my cousin the other day.”
He waited for a moment. “Are you going to tell me what it was?” he asked.
“Um, no. I don’t think I will,” I whispered. I tried to keep my voice from cracking as he moved closer to me.
“Well,” he said, his gaze moving down to my lips. “How am I supposed to make you feel better if you don’t tell me what upset you?”
I inhaled sharply as he kept moving forward. I took two steps backward before I bumped into the wall.
“She might have said something about you only being interested in me because I’m no-man’s land,” I managed to squeak out.
Ethan chuckled, and I could feel it vibrate through me. “No-man’s land, huh?”
“That’s right. And she said I’m probably a lesbian, anyway.”
His face was inches from mine now.
“You’re not a lesbian, are you, Al?” he teased, trying to meet my eyes.
“I don’t really have much to base my opinion on,” I said, the words just barely audible above the beating of my heart. “I’ll have to get back to you on that.”
“For the sake of your own peace of mind,” he whispered, leaning in so that I could feel his breath on my lips. “I’d be willing to help you figure it out.”
My pulse spiked, and I willed it to slow down so that I could form a witty reply. But, he didn’t give me a chance. His lips just brushed against mine, soft as a feather. He brought his hands up and cradled the back of my head. So gentle. His lips moved against mine—not taking, only asking.
His fingertips trailed down my arm and made me shiver. I pulled back, needing to breath. He didn’t let go of me though.
“We should go back outside, before we ruin this by fighting.” His smile was genuine, if the slightest bit wistful.
I blushed. Yeah, he was probably right.
Liam walks through a room lit by tiny glowing spheres suspended in the air. The round lights cast shadows on the high-curved walls. He keeps his head bowed as he nears a woman seated on a dais against the far wall. Her hair, as black as a moonless night, is gathered at her neck by a jeweled clip, and hangs in loose waves over one shoulder. Eyes as blue and cold as ice watch him approach.
Liam kneels slowly at her feet, eyes trained on the floor. The woman smiles, and cocks her head to the side like a bird, grabbing his chin and pulling it upward until his eyes meet hers. As he speaks, the woman’s face contorts in rage. He winces and she loosens her fingers, leaving behind a bloody trail where her fingernails have cut him. The woman closes her eyes for a moment before shoving him roughly onto his back.
I sat up in my bed, my lungs screaming for air. I pulled my legs up and rested my forehead against my knees as I attempted to catch my breath. Rain beat against my window, matching the drumming of my heart.
For the past six months I’d dreamed about Liam almost every night. Most of the dreams involved blood and fear. They’d gotten more intense now that I’d actually met him too, more foreboding.
The need to go for a run came upon me so suddenly that when I jumped from my bed, my head teetered. I counted backward from twenty as the dizziness subsided and changed into shorts and a tank top. A little rain never hurt anyone.
I inhaled the smell of wet grass as I bound down the front steps. The air was misty, and a gray cloak hung over the trees and early-morning streetlights. It took all of my self-control to force myself to warm-up when all I could think of was launching into a mind-numbing sprint.
The rain eased as I ran, leaving a dreary fog in its wake. After an hour, I looped back around to the bend in the road just before the path to what was now Liam’s property.
Allison.
The voice was the same as last night. It made my name sound like a song. But this time there was no one around.
I stopped running, forgetting about cooling down or stretching. My stomach clenched with leftover panic as I looked around in the gloom. I approached the path when Liam stepped out of the trees. His expression was the same uncomfortable one he wore when I saw him last night, as though he dreaded speaking to me.
The blonde materialized next to him, as if the mist had been hiding her body. She cocked her head to one side…reminding me of the woman in my dream. She looked nothing like that raven-haired woman, but she was equally beautiful. Her golden hair was sleek and smooth, cascading down past her shoulders, and her eyes were such a light gray they appeared nearly colorless.
I stopped walking. Something about this woman made me nervous. She smiled at me, her icy eyes glinting, even though the sun hadn’t yet made an appearance today.
“Allison,” she said out loud in the same voice I'd heard in my head. A shiver raced down my spine when she spoke. Why were they even here?
“Liam? What’s going on?” I asked through clenched teeth.
“I wasn’t prepared for this,” Liam said, his eyes focused on the ground. He was grinding his teeth, too.
“I’m sure you weren’t,” the blonde said. “But too much time has passed already. You should have known you couldn’t put this off forever.”
Liam looked at me then, his eyes filled with regret. My heart lurched, and I had the urge to bolt. I shouldn’t feel empathy for the man who left my mother pregnant and alone.
“I would’ve liked to...” He broke off
and turned to look at the blonde woman. “She knows nothing of your kind.”
Anger and frustration instantly replaced any other emotions that may have been building. “What are you talking about?”
Liam took a deep breath and cleared his throat. “The things I didn’t think I could explain to you last night”—he exchanged a look with the woman—“well, it appears I can explain them now.”
“Okay,” I said, “So, explain.”
The woman started walking toward me, her strange diamond eyes holding me captive. “If I may?” It came out as a question, but she didn’t appear to actually be asking permission.
“Of course,” Liam replied, closing his eyes.
“Your people often use the expression, ‘Things aren’t always as they appear.’” She paused and I raised my eyebrow, waiting for her to continue. “Whether you believe it or not, your father is here to help your mother.”
“Wait.” I held my hands up to interrupt. “Who are you?”
She smirked and glanced back at Liam. “My name is Niamh. I am one of the Tuatha de Danaan.”
“What?”
“A Danaan—a descendent of the Goddess Danu. You might recognize the term ‘fairy’ or ‘the people under hill’?”
“Fairy,” I repeated, the word sounding disjointed from my lips. “Are you a fairy too, Liam?” I choked out a laugh, looking between the two of them. They just stared back at me.
Liam cleared his throat. “Ah, well. I haven’t always been...”
“Listen, I don’t know what kind of joke this is, but my mother is ill. Just stay away from her.”
I started to turn around, but Liam held out his hand to stop me.
“Please,” he said. “Let me explain.”
I threw my hands up in exasperation.
“I was raised in County Monaghan, north of Dublin. I was born the son of a farmer”—he paused and looked me in the eye—“in 1862.”
“This just keeps getting better,” I said. Why am I even listening to this?
“My Da passed away when I was nineteen. I took on many of his responsibilities. After supper I would sneak off to a little clearing in the woods and just play my fiddle until my arms ached.”
He stopped and watched for my reaction. I just tapped my foot. “One day as I played, a lovely woman appeared. She told me she had heard the music and wanted to see where it came from. Her name was Aoife, and she was the most glorious creature I had ever seen, with raven hair and eyes like sapphires. I was completely enraptured by her. And the longer I played for her, the more I wanted to make her mine.”
Liam paused, his eyes far away, remembering.
“I soon began to long for her day and night. On the days I couldn’t slip away, I ached for her—”
“Explain how this has anything to do with my mother,” I said. He expected me to believe this?
He ignored my question and continued. “I was becoming physically addicted to her. Aoife and her folk believe that humans are their playthings. They think nothing of capturing a human and filling them with longing, only to dump them back into this world. After their encounters with the Danaan, humans are nothing but empty husks.”
Niamh cleared her throat and Liam paused.
“Not all Danaan are so callous,” she said. “Aoife is my sister, but we don’t share the same beliefs. She has been defying our laws and customs for some time now.” She motioned for Liam to go on.
“One day, I begged Aoife to come home with me. She took me to her home instead. By then, I was completely enthralled by Aoife. She was all I cared about. I forgot about my family—they were totally wiped from my mind. And as time went on, I began to come back to myself, my mind began to clear. Just by living in Tír na n’Óg, I was becoming immortal.”
“Immortal?” I asked, laughing. “What? Like a vampire?”
“We are as alive as you are, Allison. But unlike your kind, we don’t grow old,” Niamh said, her lips curving into a smirk.
“So,” Liam went on. “I started to remember my life before entering their world. I longed to see my family. I didn’t realize that decades had passed here. It seemed such a short time in Tír na n’Óg, because nobody aged there, including me. Aoife would leave occasionally, with only her handmaiden Eithne to watch over me. The first time I asked if I might join Aoife in her travels was in 1979. She agreed to take me along to Dublin.
“Several years later at the Music in the Street Festival at Trinity College, I met your mother.”
I thought of the photos I had of Liam and my mother, smiling and happy. Those must have been at the music festival. If any of this were to be believed.
“I couldn’t stop thinking about her and planning ways to see her again. I hid her from Aoife. It wasn’t easy, but I had fallen hopelessly in love with your mother. It was nothing like the obsession I’d felt for Aoife—that was nothing like love.”
Niamh looked away with an uncomfortable expression. When she caught me watching her, I quickly turned back to Liam.
“By then I had become more Danaan than human. I’d stopped aging and had developed some magical ability. Nothing like a true Danaan, but magic nonetheless.”
He frowned, and I noticed his eyes beginning to glisten.
“Your mother and I were able to continue seeing each other for about five months before Aoife suspected anything. She assumed I was involved with Eithne, her handmaiden, and began watching me closely. It was nearly impossible to meet with your mother. She didn’t understand my situation, and I was too afraid to tell her the truth. I knew I was breaking her heart by staying away, but I didn’t have a choice.
“When I returned to Tír na n’Óg, Aoife was waiting for me. She’d figured out with whom I had been meeting and was infuriated I had a desire to be with another, let alone a human.”
Liam blew out a shaky breath, and Niamh took over. “Aoife’s temper is well-known among our folk. But none of us had ever seen such fury as when she felt she was betrayed by Liam,” she said shaking her head.
“What did she do to my mother?” I blurted out, anger coloring my tone.
“She didn’t do anything to your mother—not directly anyway,” Liam said, his hands balling into fists by his sides. “Aoife placed a geis, an enchantment, on me so that I was unable to touch your mother,” his voice faltered. “And then I was forbidden to leave Tír na n’Óg, and your mother left Ireland, thinking I had abandoned her.”
I just stared at Liam, though he looked everywhere but at me.
Niamh spoke again, and her face softened. “That’s not the worst of it, though. Like Liam said, when humans are abandoned by one of us, they are driven crazy with longing. He experienced it firsthand when Aoife stayed away for just one week. Your mother has been kept from your father for twenty-two years. She doesn’t have schizophrenia—she has an unfulfilled addiction. Until she is able to touch him again, she’ll never be more than an empty shell of what she once was.”
I felt tears sliding down my cheeks as I listened to Niamh. If this story were true, maybe Liam really could help my mother. For that reason, I wanted it to be true. Another thought hit me hard and fast.
“Where is Aoife now?” I asked, my chest squeezing. “Is she the one who you are trying to protect us from?”
Niamh kept speaking as though she didn’t hear me. “During a recent gathering, I sensed something was very wrong with your father.”
Niamh looked into my eyes, and I heard her voice in my mind again.
I can read and speak to minds, so I could communicate with Liam without making Aoife suspicious.
“Liam told me everything that happened. I agreed to imprison Aoife in a fey globe. It was the only way to stop her from keeping Liam captive.”
Niamh stared into my eyes again. An image of a beautiful woman trapped in a shimmering sphere flashed into my mind.
“Aoife may not be able to cause trouble now, but there are others who would restore her to power—”
“I’ve seen her,” I i
nterrupted. “The black-haired woman in the sphere, I’ve seen her in my dreams.”
I looked at Liam. “When I first met you, I knew who you were because I’d dreamed of you. I knew you were my father because we look...so much alike.” I paused for a beat and swallowed hard. This can’t be happening. “And last night I dreamed of the woman with black hair. Aoife.”
Niamh’s brow shot up. “I don’t understand why my mother didn’t tell me about this,” she whispered to Liam.
Liam kept his head down. The muscles in his jaw were tense, his hands clenched at his sides.
I couldn’t help wondering how her mother would know about me, but my phone rang just as I was about to ask. Ethan’s name showed on the display. I turned my back to Liam and Niamh to answer.
“I need your help,” he said, sounding distressed.
“Wh-what’s wrong?” I asked warily. I didn’t know how much more I could handle right then.
“We have way too much leftover food here. Come help me eat it...please.”
I let out the breath I had been holding. “Oh, okay,” I said, relieved that there was no more earth-shattering news.
“Hey, is everything all right?”
I swallowed the truth, wondering if the fact that my life had just turned into a Disney movie would be considered all right.
“Allison,” Liam said from behind me in his thick Irish brogue.
“Oh, is someone there with you?” Ethan asked.
“Uh, yeah. I just bumped into Liam while I was out for a run.”
“Okay,” he said, something off in his voice. “Just give me a call later then.”
I put the phone back into my pocket and closed my eyes, trying to reconcile the image of Ethan’s face in my mind with everything I’d just heard. What would he think if he knew about all of this?
The answer was simple: he could never know about any of it.
I turned around just as one of the giant black birds landed on a branch just over our heads.
“You have these dreams often, you said?” Liam asked, his eyes darting up to the bird.
I nodded. “Almost every night for about six months.”
Niamh’s gaze flickered between my father and me as I told them about the dreams. Liam stared at the ground, stroking the back of his neck as I recalled the different scenarios I’d witnessed.
