Putting on a T-shirt I go into his room, get the hair dryer and can’t help but stop next to the bed. Seeing it brings back all those memories of the nights we spent making love. Him holding me close, kissing every inch of my body, making me want more of whatever he had to offer, and me taking it without a single strand of regret. Putting the dryer on the dresser, I sit on his bed, running my hands over the cool covers. Not being able to help myself I lie down sinking into his pillow, taking in his clean masculine scent, all him. I close my eyes, hands curled into the pillows thinking about him and the choices I need to make.
Nick
We take my car to Shawn’s studio apartment in Washington Heights to watch the basketball game between the Knicks and the Cavs. It’s supposed to be us and six other guys he works with from his precinct. He said Chris might show but he wasn’t sure. There might be some tension there but Shawn knows what happened between us and we’ve talked so he wasn’t too worried about us being in the same room. If he knew Cat was pregnant for me though, he wouldn’t let us step foot in his apartment. I don’t know if Matt’s going to show, it slipped my mind to ask him. If he does show up we might be getting arrested then it would be a real guys night for the ages.
Once we arrive I see Chris isn’t there yet. We have a few beers but I only drink half of mine since I’m driving then I ask Shawn, “Is Matt coming?”
“Nah. He called a couple minutes ago, then all of a sudden he said some chick he’s had a thing for asked him out. So he dropped his bros for a chick, the same thing I would do.”
“Really. Did he happen to drop the name of this chick he couldn’t turn down or see after the game?” I say, touching my bottle to my lips.
“Nah, but he must be into her to bail at the last minute, unless he just didn’t want to be in the same space with you. I don’t think that’s it though, he would have just come to fuck with you, seeing as y’all are on the outs these days.”
He’s right about that. The only woman I can think of for him to drop out at the last minute is the one I left home alone. I’m going to pop a blood vessel if it is. I thought I wouldn’t have to deal with his ass anymore. The bell rings and Shawn goes to answer it. Maybe I should call Cat, just to check on her, make sure she’s all right. I pull my phone out of my pocket and hit her name. It rings twice and I look up to see Chris saying hi to the guys and talking to Gage. Damn, why isn’t she picking up? The phone rings out and I call again with the same result. Dammit. I’m jumping to conclusions, for all I know she could be sleeping or she could have forgotten her phone in another room. Putting my phone back in my pocket I rub the bridge of my nose trying to calm my rising fears of losing her to another man.
“Hey, what’s up?”
My head snaps up hearing Chris’s voice. “Hey, not much.”
“You looked like you were in deep thought mode.”
“Work-related stuff.” I feel bad about lying to him but he’d kill me if he knew about Cat. Surrounded by cops is not the way for him to find out while I’m stressing about her and Matt. Our friendship is strained enough. When he does find out I have to be the one to tell him. I have to do it right if there is a right way to say, your twin sister lost my baby but I got your little sister pregnant. And I’m trying to make her give me a second chance by convincing her of my undying love.
“So who you going for tonight? Like I need to ask.”
“You know me, New York Knicks all the way. They let me down a lot but I still have to hold on to hope for them, they’ll make it to the finals, eventually.”
“I know what you mean. Sometimes you just have to hold out hope things will get better. They’ve been through a lot; many have come and gone. You can’t give up, they’re like the friend who fucks up but you know they’re good enough to make it through. They’re worth a second chance, or three or four, just give them time.”
I have a feeling he’s not only talking about the Knicks. I smile and nod my head while he drinks his beer. “Yeah, give ’em time.” He nods back and the game starts with Gage whipping off his shirt to expose a Cleveland Cavaliers LeBron jersey, cheering obnoxiously loud in a room full of Cops and Knicks fans with no fear at all. He constantly does this to provoke the shit out of us. Chris and I look on smiling, drinking our beers.
“Your brother’s a brave man.”
“Yes, he is.”
The Knicks lose by one and Gage’s almost murdered by a room full of pissed of Knicks fans. I rescue him by dropping him off at some girl’s house. He closes the door and I yell out my window, “Don’t drink anymore tonight, and for god’s sake don’t smoke anything.”
“I’m good, stop worrying. Kylie’s going to take good care of me.”
“I bet.” He smiles giving me a wink and a salute doubling as a wave.
I couldn’t keep my mind on the game the entire night. What Shawn said and Cat not answering her phone kept swimming around in my head drowning out my concentration on everything going on around me. I know I won’t be able to deal if she goes back to dating Matt. It took immense strength of my self-control the first time. Thinking about him kissing her, the thought of his hands on her was driving me crazy, much less convincing myself they weren’t having sex! I couldn’t bring myself to think about that possibility. Although it was the thought that kept driving me over to her house unexpected and once again turned me into a mini-stalker worrying myself to distraction. I’m glad she moved in with me because I don’t know how much longer I could have kept it together wondering what she was doing every night, if she was doing it with him much like tonight.
When I get home I fight the urge to march into Cat’s room first, holding on to hope she didn’t go out with Matt. It helps to calm my fears when the first thing I see is her phone on the couch, which brings an elated slow smile to my face. I stop in the doorway of my room seeing the most beautiful sight. She belongs right where she is, my sleeping beauty, picture-perfect.
Walking in as quietly as I can, I sit down next to her on the bed putting my left hand across her. Her eyes flutter open, and I brush her hair out of her face to the side and say, “Hi.”
“Hi, I fell asleep,” she says, still waking out of her sleep.
“I see.”
“I came to get the dryer an—”
“I don’t mind. I like you in my bed.” Focusing on her lips, I lightly stroke a finger over her brow. “Do you want me to take you back to your bed? I will. But I don’t want to, I want you to stay.” More than anything in the world I want you to stay and say you’ll be mine.
Gazing up at me she says, “As much as I try to fight I can’t stop these feelings coursing through me. I can’t lock them away like a box of old memories in an attic.”
I smile, moving my eyes up to meet hers knowing exactly what she means. I could never forget a single memory of her if I tried.
“Would it be wrong of me for wanting to stay after everything you’ve done and said, Nick? Would I be a complete fool to give you another chance? Would I be weak? Because these are the questions I ask myself when I think of letting you back in.”
Hope, sweet hope. Hope I’ve never felt before soars through me at her words and I answer her one hundred percent truthfully. “No. You would be saving a life. Saving me from the person I was before you opened the door walking back into my life.” Which is the absolute truth.
Reaching up, she strokes the tips of her fingertips across the side of my face. “How do you do it? Always undressing me with your eyes, your charm, your hands, and words. Peeling my layers of protection away. Leaving me bare with little to no protection. Why? How do you always manage to do it?”
“You don’t need protection from me, Cat. It’s the other way around. You don’t know the power you have over me. You could bring me to my knees at any moment with one word. If you only knew the power you hold over me to crush me into a million fractured pieces.”
With her hand on the side of my face, she brings me closer to her; tipping her head back, she presses her l
ips to mine and whispers,
“I want you.”
I smile against her lips, heaving a sigh of pure relief and briefly closing my eyes. “Thank God. I thought I was going to have to work overtime-hard to convince you to be with me, well beyond this pregnancy. Months if not years to come,” I tell her watching her bite down on her lip to keep from smiling. “I didn’t want to push you. I wanted to see if you would come to me freely without any influence from me. Last time I didn’t do that, I pushed when I should have given you the space you asked for. I was trying to be patient and not repeat my mistakes.”
Her fingers go to the back of my head through my hair as she kisses me deep and slow. I pull away, tugging my shirt over my head barely taking my eyes off her, taking the rest of my clothes off as fast as possible. She has on way too many clothes but I’m going to fix that ASAP. Kneeling over her, I wrap my hands around her feeling her body go pliant as I crush her to my body rolling on to my back with her. God this feels good, it’s right.
Nick
Pulling her on top of me, and spreading her legs to straddle me, my tongue sweeps around her mouth as I play with her tongue and she makes the familiar moans I love to hear. It’s sweet, clear, and sexy as hell. I move my hands down the curve of her back, over her ass, grinding her against my dick and she moves her hips to the rhythm I’m setting. “I can’t wait to get inside you,” I say as she sits up on me. Pulling her shirt up, she whips it over her head in one motion and throws it on the floor. I’m in awe watching her move her body on top of me, naked, grinding her wetness against me with her hands on my stomach.
With my jaw clenched tight, I look at her making my dick jump to attention against her round full ass like a motherfucking steel rod. That’s what she does to me every time I see her like this, moaning on top of me with my hands on her smooth thighs. Her hair brushing against her breasts, touching the tips of her rock-hard nipples. Reminding me of mouth-watering milk chocolate-covered cherries, waiting to be popped into my mouth suckling like a newborn baby. “Fuck the foreplay, you’re wet enough, I’m about to lose my shit all up your stomach.”
Head tilted to the side, she brushes her fingertips across her nipples as she says, “We can’t have that, you need to be way up inside me when that happens.”
I vehemently agree. Pulling a condom from the drawer, I put it in my mouth to rip it open. She holds my hand, pushing her palm against mine, trapping the condom between us. Leaning down to swipe the tip of her soft pink tongue over my mouth like a kitten, I moan, closing my eyes against the intense rush of heat shooting through my body. Everything she does to me feels damn good.
With her nose brushing mine, she asks, “Is there any reason we would need to use this? I’m already pregnant, the damage is done.”
Shit! I know where this is going. I can see the question in her eyes.
“I mean, I didn’t expect you not to have sex when we were apart…but is there any reason at all we should use this?”
She wants to know if I had sex with someone else. I’m not going to lie to her, but I can’t tell her it was Paige—not here, not now. Fuck! I don’t want to ruin this, maybe I’ll tell her who it was after. Shit.
“There was one person weeks ago. We hooked up a couple times, three times to be exact. She was on the pill, I used two condoms with nonoxynol-9, and if I had a vat of spermicide I would have used that too.” She laughs. That’s a good sign. “You don’t have to worry about any woman showing up claiming I’m the father of their child.”
“What you’re saying is, I don’t have to worry there are going to be a bunch of little unclaimed Alexanders running around out there in the world.”
I smile and kiss her lips. “Exactly. The only little Alexander you have to worry about is the one you’re going to give me.”
She sits up on top of my stomach, takes the condom from my hand, and throws it across the room. I love to look at her; she’s perfect to me. I trail my hands across her bare breasts and watch as she sucks her lower lip into her mouth. Her eyes heat up and I move both my hands from the tips of her nipples to the center of her stomach, stroking my thumbs against her skin. I can’t believe she’s pregnant. She moves against me and I look up at her, this beautiful girl I don’t want to be without. “I love you, Cat.”
Putting her hand over mine on her stomach she quietly says, “I know.”
My breath hisses out between my teeth when she wraps her hand around me, swirling the head of my dick around her slick wet folds, with trust and without barriers, she guides me into her body. I’m watching her every move hardly able to breathe, she has me so turned-on. Her other hand moves over her breast to play with her nipple while she makes the sexiest sound I’ve ever heard in my life come out of any female’s mouth. She’s a natural, I don’t have to tell her what to do, she knows. Still teasing me with her body, she closely watches me with lust-filled eyes, swinging her hips from side to side, and I manage to growl out harshly, “Shit.”
I’m about to lose it and throw her down on the bed and dive into her when she sinks down my length saying my name with both of her hands stroking over her breasts. I close my eyes and let the sensations take over as my eyes roll back into my head from the feel of her wet hot pussy creating the sweetest friction against my dick. “Shiiiit, I could burst inside you, I’m so fucking hard. Damn, I missed this,” I say as she puts her hands on my stomach, rocking and bucking on me, finding a tempo and pace that’s right for her.
“I missed…this,” she says in a throaty moan.
She’s so wet she slides up and down effortlessly as if she’s coated with a can of oil, moaning my name over and over again; My hands on her ass, I rock up deeper in her. “I love to hear my name come out of your mouth repeatedly,” I tell her, watching her full wet lips part. A song sung for me. Best fucking song I’ve ever heard in my life.
I can tell she’s almost there, her head tipped back, her mouth wide open. She holds on to my hands, leaning forward over me with her legs squeezing tight against me. The tips of her breasts grazing my chest, she screams my name loud and clear and it’s the best sound I’ve ever heard. Music to my ears.
Before she’s finished, I roll her onto her back, spreading her legs wide for me. I stroke all the way up in her until I can’t move. She murmurs, “Nick.” And all my focus is on her in my arms, goddamn she’s beautiful.
“Nick…”
I instantly stop holding myself back, willing myself to hold still inside of her. Bracing my weight on one hand and the other palm flat against the headboard, breathing hard. She opens her eyes and looks at me.
“What’s wrong?”
“I don’t want to hurt you or the baby.”
Panting, she tells me, “You won’t. If I feel anything I’ll let you know. I promise.”
Closing my eyes I drop my forehead against hers, trying to control myself. “I know I can be unrestrained when I’m lost in the moment like this.” I’m ready to fucking explode. I can hardly get the words out of my mouth. “Are you sure?”
“I’m sure, I want you to feel what I’m feeling. I want you to come in me. I want to feel everything you feel.”
Kissing her lips, I slam into her hard. She shuts her eyes and opens her mouth in a perfect O with a gasp of pleasure. I rear back again and slam into her, riding her to my release. The sheet slides to the floor and my hand presses against the headboard to keep her head from hitting it. With her legs wrapped around me, my head drops between her shoulder and her neck moaning her name as I pour everything I have into her. Fucking amazing.
I try to catch my breath still in her, her warmth and softness surrounding me. Nuzzling the side of her neck with the tip of my nose, I kiss her under the side of her chin. She sighs, her fingers playing with the back of my neck sending a tingle through me, her other hand stroking lines up and down my back with her fingernails.
“That feels good. You feel good,” I say against her skin.
“Mmm. So do you.”
“You okay
?”
“Yes, I’m more than okay. Thanks to you,” she says languidly.
“I did my job, then.” I kiss the edge of her ear, swirling the tips of my fingers across her skin.
“You did more than the job required. You went far above and beyond.”
I give a little chuckle and raise my head. “Are you sure you’re okay? I know at times I go kind of hard.”
She rolls her eyes at me and smiles. “I’m fine. Stop worrying, nothing hurt, it was all good. See.” She puts her hands on my ass and rocks her hips forward, pushing against me. I growl from the residual sensations from the friction she’s causing with me still in her.
I playfully bite her neck; she gasps, and I slowly pull out of her, gathering her in my arms with her back against me and the rest of her between my legs.
She laughs and looks over her shoulder at me. “What?”
“I love you.”
She puts her hand on my cheek. “I know, but I’m hesitant and things are not perfect. I’m willing to try. I know what making this choice means for us all.”
“So do I,” I say against her skin, kissing her shoulder and holding her tighter. “I love you. I love you. I love you.” I am never letting this woman go. She’s the one I’m going to marry and spend the rest of my life with. She doesn’t know it yet but our future is already written in the stars.
I pull the covers back over us and stroke my hand over her stomach. It feels good to be able to freely touch her and have her in my arms.
“Nick?”
“Yeah?”
“Were you with her in this bed?”
Should have known this was coming. “Yes.”
“I hope it wasn’t on these sheets.”
Imperfections Come To Light (The Imperfection Series Book 2) Page 7
