by Glenn, Roy
I thought about being a baby, as Lester put it, and go crying to the EEOC. “For what?” On paper Brent would be the best choice for the position. He had twenty years of experience compared to my seven. UCLA graduate with a master’s in finance from Stanford. If I pushed the complaint I would lose, and then where would I be? “Broke, out of work, and black balled. I don’t think so.”
I felt disappointed in myself. As a child growing up in Detroit, my father always stressed the fact that a Black man in America has to live by a different set of rules then the rest of the country. He must be as good as his competitors to be considered, and twice as good to be selected. He taught me to stand up for myself and never accept anything from anybody. And most important, to accept discrimination with dignity and honor. However, it must be fought on all levels, wherever it is permitted to exist. My father told me that it is a life-long battle and the victories will be few and far between. “How do I fight this one, Pop?” I wondered.
I was so deep in the zone that I didn’t notice Peggy when she had walked into my office. She hit a runway turn to display her outfit. “Well, how do I look? Tavarus! How do I look?” she said with her power smile in full effect.
“Huh?”
“Earth to, Tavarus. Where are you? How do I look?”
“Oh, I’m sorry. You look outstanding as always, Peggy. I’m sure you’ll knock them dead.” Not that it will do any good. She could walk in there naked and it wouldn’t matter, I thought. It was a done deal. “Good luck to you.”
“What’s wrong with you, Tavarus?”
“Nothing. I just have a lot on my mind.”
“Did the interview not go well or what?” Peggy said as she sat down and crossed her legs. Giving me an eyeful of thigh.
“It went very well, as a matter of fact. I was a little apprehensive about an interview by committee, but it flowed. I got into a good rhythm. And the way they kept firing questions, you just start responding.”
“Now you got me scared.” Peggy stood up. “Well, I gotta go. They’re waiting for me.”
“They called you already?”
“About fifteen minutes ago. I’m just making them wait,” Peggy said as she left the office. I looked at my watch and did the math. They couldn’t have had too many questions for Brent. On the other hand, why should they? After all, it was a done deal.
About four that afternoon Albert James stopped by my office. “Are you busy, Tavarus?” he asked. Then continued before I could answer. “If not, stop by my office.”
“On my way,” I said as the door closed behind him. “Show time.”
I walked down the hall to Albert’s office wondering how I would respond. Knowing where this conversation was going, I wondered if Lester’s off-the-record visit was in an official or unofficial capacity. Would Albert simply want my answer to what Lester had said earlier? I hoped not. I wanted Albert to lay it all out for me. I wanted to look surprised and then offended, when Albert made his foul offer. I thought about my father’s words about dignity and honor. I took a deep breath and knocked on the half-opened door to Albert’s office. “Come in, Tavarus. Shut the door and have a seat.
After dispensing with the pleasantries, Albert laid out the proposal, which I reluctantly accepted after being told there would be no salary increase. Naturally, Albert was a little smoother than Lester, but the point was still the same. With one exception: Albert didn’t hint at better things in the future if I complied. His selling point was: “We need you to carry the ball. The team needs you, Tavarus. I’m sure you won’t let us down.” Albert said as he ushered me out of his office. The whole thing took less than ten minutes.
I returned to my office and began to organize my things to leave for the night. Suddenly, Peggy burst through the door. “I don’t believe this,” she said furiously.
“I guess you heard,” I said calmly.
“Do you believe this? That asshole can’t even tell the difference between a debit and a credit.”
“Are you pissed about something, Peggy? ’Cause I’m sensing a bit of hostility coming from you.”
“Damn right I’m pissed. Brent is an idiot.”
“Blithering idiot.”
“Right, and a kiss ass.”
“That’s why he’s got the job.” I smiled at Peggy. “Maybe you’re not kissing the right ass, Peggy,” I said with a hint of sarcasm.
“What are you trying to say, Tavarus?”
“Lighten up, Peg. All I’m saying is the boy plays golf with Albert and them. I don’t know what we were thinking. The job was his from the start.”
“I guess you’re right,” Peggy sadly admitted.
“I’ll see you in the morning,” I said as I walked past her.
“Where are you going?” she asked.
“I’m going to get drunk and pass out in some woman’s arms.”
“Wait a minute.” She jumped up and followed me out of the office. “Mind if I go with you?” She smiled and looked me up and down. “I need a nice stiff one myself.”
I kept walking, appearing to ignore her comment and the implications behind it. Peggy was about to set it out for me. I stopped walking and looked at Peggy and said to myself, “Decide now, Tee. You gonna fuck Barbie or not?” I wasn’t sure. “Sounds like you’re volunteering for the job.”
“You never can tell, I just might be.” Peggy rushed to her office to get her purse and quickly joined me at the elevator.
We went to the first bar we got to and sat down at the first empty table we could find. It just happened to be in a dark corner. Go figure. “What are you drinking, Tavarus?” Peggy asked as the waitress approached.
“Remy Martin,” I replied. “Straight up with a water back and twist of lemon.”
“What’s that?”
“What Remy? It’s cognac. It’s good stuff.”
“I’ll have one too,” Peggy said. She was still clearly shaken by today’s events. “If you had gotten the job, I could have dealt with that. You’ve been doing the job for months. But Brent, my God, he’s only useful if you don’t know where the party is. We went partying one night and he knew all the spots. But he is such a jerk. So full of himself I almost gagged. Now I work for this asshole. I know he’s gonna be all over me now.”
“Why is that?”
“I just know how he is, that’s all,” Peggy answered without answering. I started to ask the question again, but I really didn’t care. I really didn’t want to be there with Peggy talking about the job.
The waitress returned with our drinks. I reached for my drink. “Don’t go anywhere,” I said. Then I turned up my glass and drank it like water. “Make the next one a double.” Peggy followed suit. Then grabbed her glass of water. “That burns a little going down.”
I laughed. “For future reference, this is sipping liquor.”
“I can tell you right now, there is no future in that drink for me. Bring me a sloe screw against the wall.”
“A what?”
“It’s a combination of a sloe gin fizz, a screw driver, and a Harvey wall banger. It’s good, you should try one.”
“Nah, I try never to change horses in the middle of the stream.”
Peggy leaned forward and smiled alluringly at me. “Suppose the horse throws you off. Do you mount the other horse and ride?”
My eyes opened wide. “Maybe. But only if the horse knew I was just there for the ride.”
Peggy leaned back in her chair. The bluntness of my answer put her off, but only for a minute. She knew she had set the tone by picking up on my ‘Pass out in some woman’s arm’s’ line. I could pretty much guess what was going through her mind.
“Decide now,” she was probably saying to herself. She looked over at me. But can she fuck me tonight and work with me in the morning? She decided to back off the obvious flirtation for the time being and talk about something else. “That’s how they did you. They just rode you, knowing all the while Brent was their boy,” she said, managing to turn sexual innuendo into
something work related. I admired her for her ingenuity.
For the next few hours, I sat through Peggy venting, and four more doubles. After her fourth screw against the wall, Peggy was in a mood I wasn’t accustomed to seeing. She had taken off her jacket and had unbuttoned the top button a while ago. The second worked itself loose from her laughter. She didn’t seem to care. Gone was the smooth and highly-polished, edged Peggy, the accountant, portrayed in the office.
I had decided an hour ago that I was going to drink and have a good time with Peggy, and that was that. However, now, under the influence of alcohol, her naturally aggressive tendencies seemed more predatory, more sexual. I liked aggressive, powerful women; it was one of my weaknesses. I looked Peggy over. With her blouse unbuttoned, Peggy exposed her cleavage. More cleavage than I had given her credit for. Peggy was an attractive woman, black or white. “You know something, Peggy.” I pointed at her, glass in hand.
“What’s that, Tavarus?”
“You’re kinda fine. For a white girl.”
“Just what’s that supposed to mean?”
I scanned the room with my eyes. “Let’s just say you carry around a bit more tangible assets than your average white girl, Peg.”
“Are you trying to say that I have a big ass, Tavarus?”
“I mean, you don’t have a big, ‘jiggling baby’ sistah kind of ass, but compared to the rest of these slouches. I mean, look at them. They’re all suffering from white woman’s disease.”
“From what?”
“No ass at all.” I held up one finger. “Look, no-ass-at-all.” Pointing at women as they passed by our table. “No ass at all. No ass at all. No ass at all.” Peggy laughed. “This is usually the point where I’d ask what was up with that, but I can’t ask you. ’Cause you’re carrying a little something.”
“I know. Did I ever tell you that I used to do a little modeling when I was in college?” Peggy asked, knowing the answer was no.
“No, Peggy, you never mentioned that before,” I replied, becoming more intrigued by her. I motioned for the waitress.
“I remember one designer I worked with saying that I would never make it as a runway model, because of the way clothes hung off my ass.” The waitress arrived. “Bring me an Absolute Citron shooter.”
“Just water for me thanks,” I said.
“I’ve always been a little self-conscious about it until I started working here. Some of those women in data entry put little old me to shame,” Peggy said, laughing through her best southern belle accent.
“Mind if I ask you a personal question, Peggy?”
“Depends on how personal, Tavarus.”
“Is this the most Black people you’ve ever been around at one time?”
“Yes,” Peggy said reluctantly.
“I could tell. Having to work with all those sistah’s has changed you. You’re not the same California girl you were when you got here three years ago.”
The waitress returned with Peggy’s shooter. “Don’t go anywhere.” She shot it. “One more time, honey.”
“You ought to take it easy on those.”
“I don’t want to feel, Tavarus. I don’t want to think about anything. I don’t want to feel. I don’t even want to know.”
“Know what, Peg?” I asked.
“See it’s working, ’cause I don’t know.” Peggy stood up. “I’ll be right back. Don’t go anywhere.”
After a while, Peggy made her way very gingerly back to the table in time to meet the waitress. Peggy broke out the plastic to pay the check, ordered another round, and drank the one she had. Then she leaned forward and kissed me on the cheek.
“What was that for?”
“’Cause I felt like it.” She smiled. “I wanted to see if I’d like it. I was aiming for your lips, but you turned your head too quick.” Once again, the waitress arrived with drinks. “I hope you don’t mind. I took the liberty of ordering you another drink.”
“Why would I mind? You were going to take liberties with my lips, how’s a little drink gonna matter?” I raised my glass. “To Brent.”
“To Brent. May his reign be short and disastrous,” Peggy said.
“Here, here. I second that motion.” I wondered if my soon-to-be partners would consider including the high-powered white girl on the team. It would be a strong move and would improve their access to clientele. The raised glasses came down empty once again. Peggy put her glass down and grabbed the table to steady herself. That last citron shooter took her over the edge.
“I need to get some air, Tavarus,” she said. I stood up, extending my hand to help Peggy get to her feet. I led her outside and walked her to her car. After a while, Peggy caught herself. She took another deep breath. “I’m all right now, Tavarus. Thank you.”
“Are you going to be all right to drive home?”
“I don’t think I should. APD likes hanging around here.”
“I know that’s right. They probably make a fortune on DUI cases around here,” I said, part of me regretting that I’d asked.
“Would you mind driving me to my apartment? It’s not too far from here. I can call a cab and pick up my car in the morning.”
This time it was me who needed the deep breath. She wasn’t that drunk, but she didn’t need to drive. I wouldn’t be able to forgive myself if something happened to her because I let her drive. “That’s cool, where do you live?” I asked as we started for my car.
I opened the car door for her. “The Estates at Phipps. You know where that is, don’t you?” Peggy replied.
“No.” I laughed and closed the door. I came around to the driver’s side and got in.
“It’s on Phipps Boulevard, next to Phipps Plaza across from the Ritz Carlton.”
“Impressive, most impressive.”
“You think you can find that, or do you need detailed instructions?”
“Are you comparing me to Brent on the sly, Peggy?”
“Now, Tavarus,” she said, putting her hand on my thigh, “you know I have the highest respect for you.”
“There you go again, taking liberties with my body.”
She squeezed it this time. “Solid, too.” She giggled.
Peggy slept through the short drive to her apartment complex. “Peggy—yo, Peg”—I nudged Peggy—“We’re here, where’s your apartment?”
“I thought you didn’t need detailed instructions?”
“Anyway . . .” I smiled. “Which way is it?” Peggy guided me in annoying detail to her apartment. She got out of the car under her own power. “I’m okay; I can walk,” she slurred as she gathered herself together. I was thankful. Carrying a drunk white girl around in Buckhead was the last thing I wanted to do.
Peggy semi-staggered toward her door and fumbled for her keys. Once she unlocked the door, I started to say good night. “Well, Peg, I’ll . . .”
“Come on in. I want to show you something,” she said, grabbing me by the arm.
“Okay, but just for a minute.”
“Have a seat,” she said, stepping out of her heels as soon as she walked through the door. I followed her in, looking around the spacious apartment. “Very nice, Peggy.”
“Thank you.”
“What do you want to show me, Peggy?” I started to sit on the couch, but selected a lone chair instead. Peggy handed me two large books and started walking toward the bedroom. “My high school and college yearbooks.”
I flipped a few pages. “Where are all the Black people?” I shouted.
“I told you there weren’t many.” Peggy replied. I heard water running, so I assumed the she was in the bathroom. Then she reemerged from the bedroom, bare legged. From where I was seated, it appeared that she had taken off her bra as well. “You want a drink, Tavarus?”
“What do you have?”
“Citron okay? It’ll have to be; it’s all I have.”
“I guess it will have to be. But just a small one; I still have a long ride ahead of me.” I closed the yearbooks and placed th
em on the table. I stood up and walked toward the kitchen. Peggy came out carrying the bottle and two glasses. She handed me a glass and then took a step closer. “What should we drink to?”
“I don’t know, anything; so long as it doesn’t involve Brent or anything work related,” I replied, stepping toward Peggy almost out of instinct.
“Let’s drink to this evening. I had a really nice time tonight.”
“I’ll drink to that. I enjoyed the evening, too. We have to hang out again.”
“Do you mean that?” Peggy said, almost in disbelief. “You want to hang out with me?”
“Yeah, you can show me all the hot spots in Buckhead.”
“I never got the impression that you liked me very much.”
“Why, because I’m not all over you like everybody else?”
“No, actually I appreciate you not being all over me. I think it’s inappropriate for a work environment. There I go talking about work. Anyway, here’s to tonight. I enjoyed your company.”
We toasted our evening and emptied our glasses. I leaned forward to put my glass on the bar just as Peggy reached for the bottle to refill the glasses. Her breasts brushed softly against my chest, ending all speculation about the bra.
“I mean that, Tavarus; I like the way you carry yourself. Strictly business,” she said, taking the liberty of refilling my glass. “I watch the way you handle yourself. The way you dress. The way you walk. It’s very sexy.” Peggy handed me my glass and stepped to my chest again. She exhaled. I felt her nipples brush my chest.
“I didn’t know you watched me that closely,” I replied, trying to sound unimpressed, but failing.
“That’s because you don’t pay me any attention.”
“You’re wrong. I notice quite a bit about you, Peggy.” My eyes met hers, and then dropped to her cleavage. She followed my eyes. Peggy touched my face and she kissed me. It caught me off guard at first.
Slowly I warmed to the task, putting my body into the kiss. Then I pulled away abruptly. I finished my drink and began to straighten my jacket.
“You’re not getting ready to leave, are you?”
“Yeah,” I said slowly and reluctantly. “I better go before we do something I know at least one of us will regret in the morning.”
