by Diane Munier
“Fifty thousand dollars. Twenty-five now, the rest to be added in increments over a period of ten years. That disbursement is her choice.”
I wanted to punch him. I nearly did. I had to turn away. That whiskey. I turned back to him. I had just risked my life right down to the private hair, each and every, for three thousand three hundred eighty dollars that I still didn’t even have. Add to that two hundred fifty from my second go in the war. I’d been damn proud of having so much to lay at her feet, I can tell you. And this honey-tongued viper just pissed all over it, all over me, and my mouth hanging open like a lolling cow’s.
I’d like to stick each crisp bill right up his chute. “What she say to this?” I asked. Well he’d done told me. She said I would have a time, and I was having it alright. She should of primed me for it and not let him blindside me. She should of said something. This was conspiring, that’s what. And me her husband. There was just no telling on this girl. Lord, God mayhap I’d have to lay down the law cause she just didn’t seem to catch on to it. I was the man. I was the man, dammit, I was and she was full of surprises…just brimming over seemed like. What next? I am the Queen of England? I live in Buckingham Palace, by the by? What next?
I spit again. “That’s a hell of a load,” I said.
“She said you would find it a burden.” Pity for me in his rich man’s eyes. Pity for me who still felt the peace of her flesh. Pity.
“She did, did she? Well I guess you know everything there is to know about her. That what you’re saying?” My hands were on my hips of a sudden.
“No…I….”
“She is my wife. Last time I looked…my wife. This morning in our bed…my wife. Today, kissing her sweet lips…still mine. My breakfast. My smiles. All mine. So what are you doing here?” I had stepped close and he stepped back quick, and that just fired me up more. He didn’t trust me none. I liked that so much for I surely did not trust him.
“I was hoping….”
“Yes. You can have his dead body. Yes you can.” I was pointing.
“Oh…she explained that….”
“She did. Come and get him before he sprouts into something big and gnarly gray with money dripping off for leaves.”
“Before you get yourself worked up you need to listen to me. This is her money. It is rightfully and lawfully hers. She and Richard should have prosecuted Charles. His reckless behavior cost them their livelihood. She deserves this and you are going to have to see that.”
“I’m gonna…you let me tell you something…I don’t have to see nothing. You don’t come here and tell me what to see…what not to see…you don’t tell me shit.”
“I am tired of your overbearing, hostile reaction to…you wish to punch me Mr. Tanner? Would that make you happy? Would you finally feel like a big man? Go on. Get it out of your mind once and for all.” He moved his face close, tilted his chin to give me the best angle, “You think this will solve whatever it is you have against me, here it is. Punch me.”
I kept staring, thinking of how good it was going to feel. I moved my feet cause the angle wasn’t as good as he thought. Then I punched him. Sent him to the floor with that right hook.
Pa called, “Tom.” My name in that barn like days of old.
I was stretching my fingers cause damn that hurt. “Sir,” I said in answer.
“What would tempt you to do such a thing?”
“He asked me to,” I said over my shoulder. Cousin sat there, knees bent, feet flat, hands wide behind him for he leaned back. I offered a hand to help him onto his feet. He ignored it and got up on his own.
He was working that jaw. I hadn’t let loose that much. He’d have a bruise, but he’d live.
Pa was there fussing on him. He assured Pa he was fine. I noticed how it hadn’t given me the satisfaction I’d hoped. I felt I needed to do it again. If he offered me a second opportunity, I’d go left this time.
“Better now?” said he.
I was fixing to tell him, “Not yet,” when I remembered something vital. “S’cuse me,” said I. I went to the house then. Inside Johnny had him a big cup of milk, a bigger slab of bread and jelly, and a stack of cookies. Kettles were steaming on the stove, and Ma and Lavinia were working over everything, both of them flushed.
“Ma,” said I, “need to talk with you.”
She wiped her hands on her apron and walked to where I stood near the cupboard. “I was wondering about Granma’s ring.”
She was beaming at me. Shame she’d be fuming at me once she saw Cousin. Seemed like I never could bask in her sunshine for long. “I cannot think of one more fit to wear Granma’s ring than our sweet Addie,” she said. Then she did a thing. She kissed my cheek.
“Thank you, Ma,” I said.
So off she went to get such, and I noticed the hamper they were packing. One big, one bigger still. Then the stack beside, bedding looked like, clothes for Johnny, mayhap something of mine. I would be taking the carriage with me again looked like.
But Pa brought the wagon round instead. And it took all of us to load it. Quinton and cousin were leaving in the morning. Once it was filled, he stood near the wheel. The womenfolk had seen the mark. Lavinia was all concern, having a reason for much touching. Ma was beside herself again, shaking her head at me. Johnny took one look, then his eyes shone at me proud. There would be hell at the schoolhouse I feared. And I’d no one to blame but myself. Yet I did not know regret, only that wanting to do it again. For I was full-up on the Varn men, and with the other two dead, it came down to him.
I’ll give them this, even me punching Cousin could not damper their joy. They had loaded me up with all they’d hoped to give for the wedding. It was Christmas for us. This place was a horn of plenty and we were the ones. Did Cousin see this? We wanted for nothing.
I shook his hand come time. I put mine out first, all looking on. He had to take it…but it’d been me, I’d done what I saw fit. So he did shake. “Look,” I said, “she should do what seems right to her.”
He nodded. “You were her stumbling block, not the money,” he said, bracing himself for another poke it seemed. “Understand something,” he said, and him and I stepped away from the others, “it was always you. If I had any hope…it died that day we crossed paths at the station.”
Now this…was better. I nodded, for he had it right.
“You knew how it was when you took her. You knew before that,” I said.
“Yes. But I wasn’t sure you were right for her. But…you were always her choice.” He glanced at Lavinia then. “Matters of the heart….”
I said, “Thing of it…I was her choice ‘fore you showed here. Don’t ever look through me again like I ain’t standing. Then you and me will do fine.”
He laughed a little, stretching his sore chin, his hand going to it. “I…yes.”
“Then it’s settled. Do what you need to. Get to Greenup tell Jimmy about the body. He’ll send the undertaker. And we’ll get him sent home.”
We parted with some understanding then. Least for me, the war with Cousin had reached a truce.
So Johnny and me were on our ways. Pa insisted I take my team. This wagon as well, and the carriage I drove most Sunday’s would come later. There would be more bounty coming, I knew, and them so glad to give it. I’d left home a humble man and was bringing home treasure. Course I was married to a girl done the same. She was an heiress now. Lord.
Johnny rode ahead a little, kicking dust just like Gaylin would. He was a rider from his time in the saddle with me and William. I wondered my pard still lived. Reckoned Mose and him…what a pair, and William to be a father. If he thought it quick, well I had bested him, for I had me two now, and just like that.
I checked my pocket and felt that ring. For all Cousin would give…this ring…couldn’t be touched, what it was, given by my grampa to her, worn forty-seven years, and what it would mean to us as man and wife. I could not wait to see her, I could not wait to hold her and slip this on her finger.
T
om Tanner
Chapter Twelve
Addie gave me another fancy greeting, Janey on her hip. She seemed eager to me then, and us with the full wagon, and her just crying out. “All this?” she said. “Oh not that wedding quilt. Not that,” she said.
“That was Granma’s, not Ma’s,” I said. “Don’t worry. She didn’t die in it or nothing.” We were laughing, and I hugged her, Lord, smashing poor Janey like always, and her loud about it.
“They let you out of the schoolhouse already?” she asked Johnny.
He was busy getting him a load to carry in. “Pa got me out,” he said like I’d sprung him from jail.
She looked at me, chin pulled back. Yes darling, I thought, he calls me Pa.
But I did not say it. The joy was in me again and I could only laugh. She looked at me like I had done a good thing and there would be equal reward, and it fired me, though I had done nothing but receive my new handle in a kind of wonder.
We took great delight in our many gifts. Johnny was wild with the unpacking. Jars of pickles, beets, corn, beans, jams, jellies. Loaves of fresh-baked bread. Two crocks of cinnamon butter. Two cakes, and Addie had already made the one for Johnny, now he had three. Sheets. The wedding quilt and another. Two new shirts for Johnny. One pair of new britches. A gown for Janey. A cloth for the table. China packed in a box in straw. Six spoons in a sack. A box of white candles. A kettle wrapped in an embroidered pillow case said, ‘husband,’ the other case in the kettle. It said, ‘wife.’ Coffee beans in a jar and a pouch of sassafras tea. Two bottles of root beer. Bag of white sugar. Licorice. Two crocks of stew, one beef, one lamb from the scent. Another crock of fried chicken. A bottle of Ma’s vanilla. I’d drank me some of that a time or two. Jimmy could kill a whole bottle. Two hooked rugs. Towels and doilies. A vase. Two samplers with bible quotes already framed, “Love keeps no record of wrongs,” and, “Forgive others as the Father has forgiven you.” Message received, Ma. A foot stove for the carriage. This meant, “See you in church, no excuses.” And two featherbeds. A big one for us, a smaller for Johnny. These were my favorite gifts. These would give us what we needed to move Johnny off the family tray onto one of his own. That Ma of mine was clever. They’d had her in the war it would have been over sooner.
Addie said, “Oh my heart she works so hard to collect the feathers. Tom…we can’t let her give these,” she said.
“It’s joy for her,” I said. Johnny hooted up a storm to see his bed so fat. Whatever it took to make it look like something a boy couldn’t resist. So he jumped onto it until I had to tell him to stop. We didn’t have but the one room and he could make it grow so small.
“Best come help me with the chores,” I said to him. I set him the work, and he went out, then I hung back for a word with Addie. Well, I opened with a kiss for why wouldn’t I? “He told me about the money,” I said.
She nodded. “Hope you understand.”
“Why didn’t you tell me? I didn’t like hearing it from him.”
She looked at me so kindly. Oh, the beauty. I would never be able to stay mad at her. Just like those samplers.
“It’s more than I can….” I tried to say, more than I can give.
She put her fingers over my lips. I let them stay a minute, then I licked against them and she squealed and took her hand away. She was laughing, wiping her hand against her apron. I grabbed her to me and kissed her. Honey, is what I thought, and I deepened it until she moaned and my head blew off.
She pulled away. “Don’t you dare say you can’t give me anything the Varn’s have to offer. Hear me?”
“Yes Ma’am,” I said, holding her so close I had my forehead against hers.
“I earned this. This is mine,” she said. “It will never be enough, but if we can put it to good use…let’s do it. You and me,” she said.
I liked that idea so much. “I’d rather put you to good use,” I said boldly.
She laughed. “I love you…Pa.” She batted her lashes.
“I ain’t your Pa,” I growled. I didn’t know I could growl, not this way.
She laughed again.
“I punched Cousin, just so you know ‘fore Johnny tells it.”
She closed her eyes. “Tom,” she said all drawn out.
“He asked me to. So I did. He’s fine though. It’ll help toughen him some.”
“Oh, I’m sure he finds it beneficial,” she said pulling away, but I could see she wasn’t too mad.
I pulled her back. “We shook. It’s fine now.”
She didn’t look won over, but she let me kiss her again. Johnny popped in then. “You coming out here, Pa? Jenny’s calling.”
“Get your hands on it, then,” I said. He came in and grabbed the buckets. He knew how to milk so he didn’t argue. Like I said, there was something about me sometimes.
When he went out, I told Addie we were hanging that wedding quilt until I could put up a wall. Our son had to see the fence. This here room wasn’t free range.
She nodded. “It got started when Richard went to the barn those times with his dark moods. He’d be scared and I’d take him in. Just him and I then.”
“That’s fine,” I said. “Just…it has to change. You and me…we just got married.”
“You don’t have to explain it to me,” she said. Then she laughed and blushed so pretty. I could just look at her.
But heartened as I was I wondered. “Surely you don’t…burn like me.” I didn’t think it possible for womenfolk.
She laughed and swatted at me.
“Well, men are just born to rut it seems. Everyone knows it.”
“Tom Tanner the things you say,” she said, and I got the feeling she liked it. Well she said as much and she was giggling. “If another comes…you’ll be there to help me. You’re the only one I need.”
Now that just made me giddy, like I had pigtails and she just yanked them good. “You wanting another so soon?” I said. “I had to go through that…I don’t know.”
“They say long as you are nursing one it makes it…difficult. Took a long time between Johnny and Janey. But…there weren’t so many times like I think there will be with us.” She said this shy. I knew it was hard to bring him up. It was hard to hear it. But the notion we would be joining many times, that took the sting quite a bit.
“And if it happens? You want me to…pull out before…I can do that.” Least I hoped I could be a man of such control. With the way it was between us a kind of frenzy built. Made it hard not to be the most selfish bastard ever lived.
“That would be good,” she said. “And…we can use our hands. I…I just don’t want to sacrifice coming together. I…sometimes I get tired…and my ladies’ times. But when we can…I will always want you Tom. Just…when you walk in, when I see you…I want you.”
“Lass, don’t tell me this when I got a cow bellyaching!” We laughed then. “No…tell me,” I said kissing her in ways I was just now perfecting. It was coming so natural to me. Like I had the kissing gift.
I felt purely grateful she was so enthused and hoped it would last. “Men in the war…sometimes they talked. Seems it can cool after a while between a man and wife.”
“It won’t,” she said. “If two are sweet and loving…it stays. Like with your folks.”
Well, I didn’t want to think on it, but they did not seem to fail in ardor, that’s for sure. “Tonight…it’s just you and me…I have something,” I said.
She nodded then, as anxious as me, seemed like. “Alright,” she said. “I have something, too.” Well, I felt like I had enough surprises from her. She had me skittish, a bit.
“Something good?” I asked for I did not know how to ease my mind enough to wait.
“Of course,” she said laughing in this way got me all jittery. Now I didn’t want to do a thing else. I wanted that surprise.
Blowing out and shaking my head, I said, “Alright then. We get things done, it’s you and me behind that quilt.”
I went to Johnny then.
After the chores were done, Johnny and I took those full buckets to the house. And what a sight did greet us. She had fixed it up some. The jars was on the one shelf, and the cloth on the table. Three cakes and a bowl of stew, fried chicken on the side. Bread and butter and root beer for our treat. Pretty much our wedding supper here at the home. The quilt was hanging, blocking our bed from prying eyes. And Johnny’s bed was made up new. His clothes in his box all nice. Around that quilt, our bed looked fit for a king and his queen, so piled and inviting. And my books upon the bureau. My chest in the corner. Womenfolk sure did know how to do the things brought comfort. This woman of mine….
So we ate and it was fine, and I told them what we ate in the army sometimes. How Michael boiled a cat for three days once, and he ate it himself then threw up for all the trouble we gave him. Sometimes they would feed us the toughest old nag, take fifteen minutes to chew one mouthful. Addie told me to stop I was ruining her meal, but Johnny loved it so much he got in trouble for laughing with his mouth so wide and filled with cake.
He fell asleep at the table soon after, while his ma cleared it and I held Janey, and between rocking her and watching Addie move around the dishes I did not see him surrender. He had his head on the table face down and I had not noticed other than the quiet nearly hurt my ears it felt so good.
So when she made me see it, I laughed and handed her Janey to feed, then I picked up that Johnny and put him in his soft bed and pulled off his boots and socks and his britches, shook them out and hung them for the morrow. They were sewn now by Ma, and nothing against Addie, but Ma’s stitches held like the word of God. We boys all said so.
I kissed her so gentle then. And I grabbed me a long shirt and out I went to the well. I had cleaned myself many a time in the dark. So I did that, washing good, shaving too. I didn’t need anything but my razor and strop and the soap. I made it smooth. Well I’d already had her once today, and I would not do that again. I’d no wish to be such a greedy ass. Well I did wish it. But she had said hands and I could not stop thinking about such. She was such a surprise, and thinking of such, what was her surprise? I feared her and loved her. Always.
