Travis held on, and the two of them swayed to the song, which repeated at least three times before her phone died. And still they moved, Ruby melted into Travis, his chest so damn tight, it was a miracle he could breathe.
He wasn’t sure how long they were like that. How long her body breathed into his. How long his arms wrapped themselves around her possessively. It could have been ten minutes or twenty. An hour or two. All that Travis knew was that he didn’t want it to end. He would have stayed that way forever, except Ruby sniffled and her body shuddered slightly.
Travis’s eyes flew open, and he realized she’d stopped moving. Something was wrong. He could feel it.
“Hey,” he whispered, moving slightly so he could see her face. Her eyes shimmered with unshed tears, and as he slid his hand along her jawline, a big fat one rolled down and slid across his thumb. “Babe, what’s wrong?” Had he done something inappropriate?
“I loved you, Travis. So much.” She sniffled again. “Too much.”
His heart tumbled over, and his stomach dropped. Travis felt sick and ashamed that he was responsible for her pain.
“Remember how we danced at our wedding?” She blinked, and another tear fell. “In the parking lot of the courthouse. Remember that?” Her voice was barely above a whisper.
He nodded. She’d worn a simple white dress, and it had rained. Her long hair was plastered to her skin, and mud splattered along the hemline, but she didn’t care. She smiled at him, and his world was complete.
Until it wasn’t. Until he screwed it up.
“There was this young couple at the bar tonight.” She smiled and looked away, but it was a small, sad smile, and it made his heart ache. “They reminded me of us. They looked so in love and sure of themselves. So confident that nothing will tear them apart and they’ll get their forever. We looked like that once.” Her eyes met his again. “We thought we were forever, but it only lasted two years.” Her bottom lip trembled. “This won’t work. Whatever this is between us. You know that, right?”
Travis finally managed to find his voice. “Ruby, you’ve had a lot to drink.”
She nodded. “I have.”
“So maybe we shouldn’t be having this conversation right now.”
“I think right now is the perfect time.”
He opened his mouth to respond, but she pressed her fingers over his mouth and shook her head.
“We won’t work, Travis, but that doesn’t mean we don’t have options.”
“Ruby—”
“No. I want you to listen to me.” She swayed against him, clutching at his chest. “I’ve thought a lot about this. When are you leaving Crystal Lake?”
He stared down at her, not really sure where she was headed. “Beginning of September, I guess.”
She hiccupped. “Okay. So we’ve got a month or so to enjoy ourselves. But on my terms.”
“When you say enjoy…” Travis wasn’t so sure he liked what he was hearing. This sounded calculated. He didn’t do calculated. He was more of an organic kind of guy.
“You’re going to take me inside, and we’re going to have sex.” She paused. “And then we’re going to have it again, and if you’re real lucky, maybe one more time.” She thumped him in the chest. “And that’s just tonight.”
He studied her carefully. “This is about sex.”
“Pretty much.”
“You want to use me for sex.”
“I think we’re using each other, don’t you?”
Nope. No way. He started to shake his head because this was all wrong. What the hell was she saying?
But Ruby reached for him. She kissed away his confusion and, despite his conviction, felt himself respond. He was only human. Travis groaned and sank his hands into her hair, pulling her closer, hungry for more. Hungry for all of her. He poured his heart and soul into the kiss, and eventually, they broke apart, each breathing hard. He looked down at her, unsure and out of his element.
“We need to talk about this,” he managed to say.
Her hand slowly made its way down his chest. Past his abdomen and lower until it settled over the hard bulge in his shorts. Wickedly, seductively, she rubbed him, and he nearly lost it when she ground against him.
“I want to go on record and say this is a bad idea.” Jesus, he sounded like a twelve-year-old whose voice was changing.
“Travis?”
“What?” Shit. She licked her lips and smiled up at him.
“Shut the hell up.”
If Travis Blackwell was a stronger man, he would have walked away. It was the right thing to do. For a lot of reasons. But Travis wasn’t a strong man—not when it came to Ruby Montgomery. When she reached for him and opened her hot mouth against his, he was pretty much done. And when she whispered dirty things into his ear, his reluctance disappeared like water down the drain.
There was a nibbling of something. A whisper that said, this won’t end well for you. But like a fool, he ignored it.
He scooped her into his arms and headed for the bedroom.
Chapter 20
“You’re in a good mood.”
Ruby tucked her laptop into her bag. “Is it that obvious?” She glanced up at Jaylene as she reached for her keys. Her assistant chuckled.
“You’ve been singing Taylor Swift songs all day. And not the breakup ones.”
“So that’s how we’re measuring happiness these days, is it?”
“It’s all in the songs.” Jaylene smiled. “Seriously, though. I don’t know what flavor Kool-Aid you’re drinking, but can I have some?”
Ruby hoped the blush in her cheeks wouldn’t give her away. The simple truth was that the flavor of Kool-Aid she’d been enjoying for the last few weeks wasn’t one she was willing to share. She glanced at her watch.
“Are you leaving early?” Jaylene asked.
“I am. Everything that was in my calendar has been dealt with. If you’re caught up, you can take off as well.”
Jaylene’s smiled widened. “Thank you. What are you up to this weekend?”
Ruby grabbed her laptop and purse and headed for the door. “I’m thirsty.”
“For what?”
She winked at her assistant. “A tall, cold glass of Kool-Aid.”
Jaylene’s giggles followed her out of the office. Her steps were light as she waved goodbye to her staff and headed out into the sunshine. It was three o’clock, and Travis was at her place working on some landscaping—something she hadn’t gotten around to finessing after she’d moved in. He’d insisted, and who was she to say no to a half-naked man working up a sweat in her backyard?
The last three weeks had been a bit of a blur. There’d been lots of Kool-Aid. Kool-Aid in the morning on her back porch. Kool-Aid in the evening on the dock. Heck, she’d even had Kool-Aid on her desk the afternoon before when he’d snuck into her office. But they’d been careful. Ruby had made it clear she didn’t want folks in town knowing what they were up to. She could tell Travis hadn’t been thrilled with the idea of sneaking around, but he’d been good about keeping things on the down low. Sure, he grumbled about being a glorified cabana boy and nothing else, but he kept coming back.
She smiled. She was glad of it.
The fact that she’d thought of nothing else but knocking off early to surprise Travis should have set off all kinds of alarm bells, and the fact that it didn’t said something. What that something was, she didn’t dwell on. No way was Ruby going to think about things that would crash the wave she was riding.
She’d do it…eventually.
Twenty minutes later, she pulled into her driveway and frowned when she spied a Ranger Rover beside Travis’s truck. Ruby parked her car and sat there for a few moments. She was early, and Travis wasn’t expecting her for a few hours, but still, she didn’t think he’d take it upon himself to invite someone to her home.
Or would he?
She slid from her car and headed inside. There were no frantic nails clicking on the hardwood floors, or excited barki
ng to greet her, but she assumed Tasha was in the backyard with Travis. Ruby slipped out of her heels, untucked her cream-colored blouse from her pale pink skirt, and loosened her hair from its clip. She padded through the foyer into the large open space that occupied the entire width of the home. There was half an acre in her backyard, and beyond that, the lake.
She spied Tasha running like mad along the beachfront, barking and yipping at the wind, it seemed, and then the small dog stopped and raced back toward the boathouse. Back to Travis and his brother Wyatt. The two men were moving a large piece of stone, black granite from the looks of it. From what Ruby could tell, it was the finishing touch to a beautiful retaining wall that he’d readied for shrubs and plants.
Both of the men were shirtless—both tall and handsome—but it was Travis who drew her eye. He’d tied a bandana around his head, and his eyes were covered by mirrored aviators. He was unshaven (which was hot as hell), his muscles slick with sweat, and his shorts hung so damn low, it didn’t take a rocket scientist to know the man was commando.
Watching him made blood rush to every part of her body and had her heart beating so fast and hard, she felt dizzy. Travis Blackwell was a drug. A potent, intoxicating, addictive drug. The withdrawal was going to kill her when he left. And he would leave, that was a given.
But she wasn’t going to think about that. At least not yet.
Annoyed that his brother was here, Ruby hesitated, but the need to see Travis trumped her discomfort, and she opened the garden doors and headed for the beach. Over the past week, Travis had designed beautiful gardens that wrapped around her deck and followed the new flagstone path he’d laid down to the beach. The retaining wall he was currently working on sheltered a fire pit and seating area.
He looked up in surprise as she approached and then checked his watch. “You’re early.” His eyes slid from hers. “I needed help to finish the wall, and Wyatt was available.”
Ruby nodded, eyes on his brother, wondering how this was going to go. She and Wyatt weren’t exactly friends. The guy hadn’t been around much when she and Travis were together. That being said, he’d never been anything other than nice when they’d met up in the past. She didn’t not like him, but she wasn’t exactly jumping for joy to see him in her backyard. There would be questions. Questions she didn’t want to answer. He shouldn’t be here.
“Hey, Wyatt.”
Wyatt offered a smile. “Your place is great, Ruby. Amazing view.”
“Thank you.”
“Been here long?” he asked.
“About a year.”
“Did you build, or was the place—”
“I built it.” She cut him off, not meaning to, but wanting the conversation over. She wasn’t in the mood to make small talk with Travis’s brother. At the moment, she wasn’t sure what she was in the mood for. Her earlier lustful thoughts seemed a long way away.
Tasha ran past them chasing after a butterfly, her antics a bit of an ice-breaker, and Wyatt reached down to pet the little animal as she rushed past. “Okay.” He glanced up at his brother. “I should get going. Let me know if you’re coming for dinner.” He smiled at Ruby. “Regan and I hope to see you guys later. And bring Tasha. Our little mutt, Bella, would love the company.
“Oh, I’m not sure what… I mean, I think I have plans.” Her voice petered off into silence, and inside, she fumed. How dare Travis put her in this position?
Ruby shot a look toward Travis, but he turned slightly, avoiding her gaze. What the hell? He knew the rules, and now she looked like an idiot. The two men said their goodbyes while Ruby made a fuss over Tasha.
“That was awkward.” Travis threw some tools into a bin.
“You think?” Ruby wanted to hit him over the head. He was acting like she was at fault.
“You didn’t have to be rude to Wyatt.”
“I wasn’t rude.” But even Ruby winced at her lie. “I might have been a bit…cold. But he shouldn’t have been here.”
Travis whipped his head around. He was angry and not making any attempt to hide it.
“Are you kidding me? I needed help, and he was available.”
“I didn’t ask you to build this, Travis. You insisted.”
He made a strangled sound and took a step back. His jaw was clenched, his hands were fisted, and he was about as close to losing his cool as she’d ever seen him.
This was so not how she’d envisioned her afternoon. The two of them should have been naked—making out like the horny teenagers they’d become—not arguing over his brother and a damn retaining wall.
Her anger left as quick as it had come, leaving her knees weak and her skin clammy. God, normally, she loved to fight because the making up was so damn good. But today it wasn’t in her. “Look, Travis, we had an understanding. Wyatt being here kind of punched a hole in it.”
His anger, however, was still front and center. “Understanding.” He made the word sound distasteful. He grabbed the bin of tools and began walking toward her boathouse. His strides were long, purposeful, and Ruby had to jog to keep up.
“Why are you so pissed off?” she asked, out of breath by the time she caught up to him. “Seriously. If anyone has the right to be angry it’s me, not you.”
Travis set down the bin. He stood for a few moments, his back to her, before slowly turning around.
“What exactly are you angry about?” he asked, his voice dangerous and low. “The fact that I asked Wyatt to help me? Or the fact that my brother knows we’re banging?”
She winced at his crudeness. “Can you not use that word? It’s juvenile.”
“Well, this,” he motioned in the air with his hands, “Is juvenile.”
She ignored his comment. “You’ve had that conversation with your family? Did you tell all of them? Jesus, Travis. Why didn’t you rent out a billboard?”
“You’re being unreasonable.”
“No.” She shook her head. “I’m not.” Why did he insist on making her the bad guy?
“Wyatt’s my brother. We talk about shit.”
“You never used to. Your brothers were too focused on their own problems, and your dad acted like you didn’t exist.”
That scored a point or two. He looked ready to explode.
“Something we have in common,” he replied, eyes dark and flashing. “The whole crap-father thing. What else do you want to throw at me?”
“That’s about it,” she retorted. “Isn’t it enough?” Her anger sizzled like a hot poker in the fire. “Look, neither one of us belongs on a family of the year poster. They suck, and we’re damaged. You know it, and so do I. They might come off as prettier or more polished, but nothing’s changed. Not really.”
He stared at her for several long moments. “If you really think that, then I feel sorry for you.”
He feels sorry for me? She opened her mouth, a hot retort on her lips, but he didn’t give her the chance to respond.
“I’ve changed. I’ve grown, and so has my family. Some, like my dad, expect a little too much, but I can’t fault him for trying. Some things can’t be forgotten, but we do move on and we try.” He paused and ran his hand over his hair, tugging off the bandana. “You know he told me he admired you, the other day. Said you had a lot of strength. Who wouldn’t think that? Look at all you’ve accomplished. But I’m not so sure anymore. I see a woman who’s still living in the past. A woman who wants me to stay there with her, and I don’t know if I can.” He shrugged. “This sneaking around? I don’t think I can do it anymore. I don’t think I want to. I’m not going to live in your bubble, Ruby. The one you’ve created because you’re too afraid to face reality.”
She wanted to punch him. Hard. Annihilate the words coming out of his mouth because she didn’t want to hear him. Travis was wrong. She had changed. There would have been a time when she would have done whatever it took to shut him up. Guess, she’d done some growing after all.
She took a moment and centered her chaotic thoughts. But most of them boiled down
to one thing. He was pulling away and she wasn’t ready for that.
“What happened to the no strings? Why are you ruining the last few weeks? Why can’t we just…” She didn’t know how to articulate the feelings inside. Didn’t know how to express her need for him, as well as the need to protect herself.
A muscle worked its way across Travis’s jaw. He was still angry. “Why am I… Christ, are you listening to yourself? This isn’t about strings. Which, I’m going to point out, is your thing, not mine. This is about the fact that we’re adults now. We’re not the kids we were the first time around. I’m ready to own my actions. I’m not afraid to admit to the mistakes I made when I was younger. I’m not afraid to be held accountable. And I sure as hell am not afraid of what people might say if they find out we’re back together.”
“We’re not back together, Travis.” She spoke quietly, but the effect was powerful. She saw it. His expression changed. His eyes hardened. “We’re hanging out. We’re enjoying a physical relationship without the emotional component. Most men would think they’d died and gone to heaven.”
“I’m not most men.” His mouth tightened.
This whole thing was spiraling, and Ruby didn’t know how to stop it.
Travis swore. He said something unintelligible and then looked her square in the eye. “Regan and Wyatt are having a barbecue. They’ve invited us, and I plan on going. It’s up to you if you want to join us. They live at the end of Ridge Road.”
He walked past Ruby and didn’t bother to look back. Not even when Tasha ran circles behind him and barked like a banshee. Ruby followed him out of the boathouse and watched until he disappeared from view. She heard the rumble when his truck roared to life, and winced at the squeal of tires as he left.
He was more than just a little angry. Thing was? Ruby thought she’d be more than just a little angry. But instead of anger, she was anxious, confused, and more afraid than she cared to admit to. The scary thing was that she was afraid to figure out what it was she was afraid of.
How screwed up was that?
Was she afraid of losing a man she’d convinced herself she didn’t want anymore? Or was she afraid of exploring what she felt for him? Was this more than just sex? If so, was she smart not to let him in, or a damn fool?
You Rock My World (The Blackwells of Crystal Lake Book 3) Page 17
