by Kristy Marie
He’s aggravated. But I’m not changing my mind. Cade is going. Better Theo goes ahead and pouts it out now.
“We’ll say we’re being adventurous and trying a little ménage.” I try not to smile because he is being so serious.
He bites his cheek, attempting to hold back his laugh. It doesn’t work and he snorts one out anyway. “I’m serious.”
“Me too. They’ll believe it.”
“No.”
“Okay. Fine. You hired him to be my bodyguard.”
He scrunches his face like that is the stupidest thing he has ever heard. “No. Not believable.”
Huffing out a breath, I look to the heavens for guidance. He is being so crybaby about this.
“He’s a med student doing a rotation in sports medicine?”
Theo’s silent. Score one for McCallister. He mulls it over for a minute before nodding. “I think that may work.”
“Of course it will work, doofus.” I pull my shades over my eyes and recline back. “Don’t burn the burgers.”
“Shit!”
The chair makes a scraping noise like he tripped over it in his haste to get up. I chuckle. He always burns the burgers.
“We’re good,” he yells.
“How Cajun is it?” I yell back.
“It’s not. I told you, we’re good.” His voice is closer. Opening my eyes, I see he has a plate piled high with perfectly grilled ground beef patties.
“How many did you make?” I ask in horror.
He shrugs. “I’m a growing boy.”
“One that I am going to have to run the hell out of tomorrow.” I hold the door open for him, allowing him to pass inside with the burgers.
“That’s tomorrow’s problem,” he says with a wink.
This is why he needs two trainers. He is an absolute handful. The team’s trainer once called me asking how I incentivize Theo to push his limits. That’s easy. Theo operates on fear and pleasure. You either withhold his orgasm or give him a blow job. Both work. Both incentivize. His team trainer didn’t appreciate my suggestions.
Cade has set up in the kitchen when we walk in. Condiments, lettuce, tomatoes, and beer are all spread out in anticipation of the burgers.
“Mmmm…” I moan. “These smell like they might actually be edible this time, Von Bremen.”
He flips me off while he pilfers through the fridge. “Where is my hot sauce?”
Yuck. I threw that shit out the other day—it was manufacturing penicillin. I turn to the table and start making my plate. “I think Cade used the last of it,” I lie.
The refrigerator door slams.
“I did not,” says a raspy voice at my ear.
Damn, Cade. Can’t you lie? Theo hates you, anyway.
“She threw it away last week. Something about it looking like a small animal was swimming in the bottle.”
I can’t have a fucking secret in this house to save my life. I chance a look at Theo. His eyes have gone all squinty. “I’ll get you some more. Geeze! It was growing mold!”
“What if I like mold?” he snaps.
Oh great. Here we go.
“Would you like me to go right now and get you more, Princess?” My hands go to my hips. He mimics me. It’s the battle of immaturity. We stand that way for, I know, half a minute, neither of us blinking.
“I guess I can live without it. This time,” he spits. Damn baby. It’s a burger, not a hot wing.
I roll my eyes and finish dressing my burger.
During our standoff, Cade made his burger and is biting into it. I glare at him and knock into his chair mid-bite, causing him to smear ketchup on his scruffy face.
“Traitor,” I mutter as I flop down beside him.
He stares at me and slowly wipes the ketchup from his cheek. I’m not really sure how to interpret the look, so I shrug and sit down to eat.
Theo’s burger is actually pretty tasty.
“What ho taught you to cook?” I tease.
Theo looks up from his plate with a scowl. “You’re getting on my nerves.”
No, he didn’t. Being the mature one in the house, I counter, “You’re getting on my nerves, too.”
We hold each other’s eyes for a minute before we both go back to eating. Cade is the first to finish and immediately starts working on the dishes. Have I mentioned how sexy it is for a man to clean?
Finished, I get up and hand him my plate with a quick kiss on the cheek. “Want to go for a run in a little while?” I ask, unloading the dishwasher.
“Sure.”
“We’ll go when we finish up here. That suit you?”
“Uh huh.”
Knowing that’s about all I am getting out of him, I finish the dishes and head up to my room to change. Theo’s perched on the edge of the bed, his head in his hands when I get there.
“You don’t want to run with me?” he asks with his face still buried in his hands.
Aww. My poor jealous boy. Sensing that I need to break the tension between us, I launch myself at him and take us both to the floor. It damn near knocks the breath out of me.
With Theo sprawled out on his back, I hastily straddle him. Leaning in close, I whisper across his warm lips, “I ran with you this morning.”
He grasps my hips hard, grinding me down on his stiff erection.
“You know I don’t share,” he growls in my ear, his undulating speeding up.
Uh oh. Someone feels threatened. Men are very simple creatures. Praise them, fuck them, and love them, and they will be the best damn companion you’ve ever had. However, when you do this to more than one, they tend to get a little territorial.
Mine and Theo’s relationship isn’t complicated. I know he loves me. But we’ve said and done things in our friendship that can never be undone. What scares me is to admit that this has never been just a friendship for me. I knew from the moment I laid eyes on him that he was meant for me. He was/is my people. I loved him when I lied and said we were “just friends.” I loved him when I said, “We should see other people.” And I cried when he said, “Okay.”
I’m no idiot. I know he loves me more than a friend but telling me years ago, “We’re just friends, right?” and keeping me in friend zone until a few years ago hurt my damn feelings and I’m not over it. Call me a petty bitch, I don’t care, but until I have Von Bremen on his knees, worshipping only me, then I am going to rub that sentence in his face until he breaks. Until he admits we were never “just friends.”
So, I wait and let him churn through all the feelings that come along with loving someone. Jealousy. Rage. Happiness. Sadness. Every day he gets closer, but it isn’t time yet.
“Hmmm… I don’t recall sharing my body with anyone else,” I soothe, pushing down harder on his straining cock.
He groans and flips us over, pulling at his zipper. “I’m about to fuck the sass right out of you. You have had this coming with all the Good Samaritan bullshit.”
His pants are off. And he’s yanking down my leggings. His finger plunges in hard—it hurts like a bitch. He doesn’t care, though, he is so far gone right now it’s not even funny. Animalistic, he flips between hard bites and soft kisses to my exposed neck. He’s unhinged. Wild. It’s so fucking sexy to see him come apart like this.
“You like this?” He growls, glaring at my smile. “You like to see me fucked up like this?”
Two fingers.
I gasp, “Yes.” I admit it. I love to break that charming, I-don’t-give-a-fuck attitude.
He rams his fingers in harder. “Fuck. It’s so damn tight.”
I moan when he brushes that spot. “Put it in,” I beg.
He thrusts with his fingers a few more times before I feel his tip breach my entrance. With a deep breath, he pushes in hard, eliciting a scream from me.
His whole body is tense when he throws his head back in ecstasy. “Oh, how I love to hear you scream.”
I lock my legs around his hips, encouraging him to shut his mouth and speed up. He does, setting a steady
pace with alternating deep and shallow strokes. I start to sweat, the euphoria pushing through the haze of pain. “I’m almost there.”
He pounds in harder, eager to steal my orgasm.
“Deeper,” I moan.
He sits back, kneeling, and pulls my ass in closer to spear me onto him repeatedly, the glorious muscles in those shoulders working. His thumb finds my clit and he presses down, the momentum rocking his thumb in sequence. My orgasm hits hard, and so fast that I don’t get a chance to warn him. When I clench his dick, he doubles over and roars. Grasping my hips in a bruising hold, he pounds into me, finding his release within seconds.
We lay there, sweaty and spent. I just let him mark me. I let him act like an alpha dog and pee all over his territory. He needed it though. He was going to be a total shit the rest of the week if I hadn’t. I stroke his back rhythmically, letting him come down from the adrenaline.
“Feel better?” I tease.
“No.”
Grabbing his face, I place a sweet kiss on his lips. His lips yield to mine, soft and pliant.
“Do you love me, Teddy?”
His brilliant blue eyes lock onto mine. “Without a doubt.”
I kiss him again. “Then, I’m all yours. There is no reason to share.”
We stare at each other a moment.
“I’m coming for you, Dr. McCallister. I don’t give a shit what excuses you dream up this time.”
I trace the line of his shoulder, absorbing his confession. “Then I suggest you bring your A-game, Von Bremen. I’m done with rookies.”
We know what the score is between us. But we’ll give it a little longer to grow before we blow this whole friendship thing to bits.
Theo nods tersely, prying our sticky bodies from one another’s. We stumble into the shower and quickly bathe in silence. We’re too tired for anything else.
“Are you going to be okay if I run with Cade?” I ask hesitantly. After the loaded conversation we had, I feel guilty immediately going to Cade.
He rakes a frustrated hand through his hair. “Yeah. Just be quick, okay?”
I nod my agreement and head into the closet to get dressed.
“If I catch you we’ll run another mile.” Anniston’s voice carries through the crisp spring air.
Pushing my legs harder, I hear her footsteps gaining on me. This is her favorite game to play. I get five minutes head start. We run for six miles total. If at any point she catches me, we add an extra mile. The first few times we played sucked ass, with me eventually just begging for mercy between bouts of nausea.
The past month has been life-altering, to say the least. Anniston and I have developed a routine. It’s comfortable. It feels like home. It’s getting easier to lose myself in her world.
Except at night.
Each night, the nightmares come. Scream after scream. Explosions. The smell of coppery blood burns my nose. I can’t escape the dreams.
Even she can’t get them to stop. Night after night, she comes to my side, holds me tight, whispering soothing words in my ear. That helps, but doesn’t make them stop. Only the blue pill does.
I don’t deserve to take it. I deserve to suffer. I don’t deserve to sleep peacefully while my friends, my team, rot in the dirt.
Finally, after many nights of her trying to comfort me, sitting next to her in the bed I now thought of as mine, I admitted what happened to my team.
“It was the coldest night we had seen in months. We’d been awake for sixty-two hours when we got word that our mark was inside this known insurgent hideout. I was so relieved to get in there and blow the bastard to bits so we could leave this hellhole and go home. Our tour had been extended for an additional three months and was on the verge of another two if we couldn’t catch this asshole. Anyway, Brannon, one of my newest officers, good kid, went in first, finally calling out the ‘all clear.’ I was pissed that we lost our mark again. Caught up in my anger and frustration of another three days down the drain, I didn’t see the cabinet was open. And when I heard the distinctive beep, it was too late. The shitty house exploded with me and my men inside. I was unconscious for a while, but when I came to, I was able to drag myself over to Brannon, and clutched his hand as the light faded from his eyes. I knew better than to rush in like that. I knew better and I failed them. Their blood is on my hands. I killed them.”
That night, I told Anniston my truth, and without words or judgments, she grasped my hand and gave me redemption.
“Let me help you, Cade. You can make it right by helping others like you. I can give you the redemption you crave. Live for them, Cade. Be the major they deserve.”
I never agreed one way or the other and we haven’t spoken about it since. She keeps me busy working my body, pushing me past my limits. It’s pure torture, but every day I see a little piece of the old me return. And every night I am reminded why that’s not me anymore.
Her footsteps are louder. She’s gaining on me. Picking up the pace, I race past the barn, hoping to cut through and gain an edge.
“I see you,” she taunts from behind.
Fuck. She doesn’t even sound winded. My lungs are in a constant state of fire. Even though I am in much better shape than before, I am not even close to her level of athleticism.
Ducking through the barn, I take a left and make the mistake of looking back. She’s not there. Confused, I slow down, looking around. Did she fall? Before I can decide to double back I’m hit hard from behind, the weight throwing me off balance and taking me to my knees.
“Gotcha!” she crows. “One more mile, slowpoke.”
Dammit.
I get to my feet and dust off my knees, giving her a pointed look. “Did you have to bum-rush me like a damn linebacker?”
She throws me a smug smile. “Of course. What would be the fun if I just tagged you like a normal girl?”
But that’s the thing, isn’t it? She isn’t a normal girl. This girl is an angel. I swear. And what she’s doing with Theo is damn blasphemy.
Meeting him in person was just as painful as I thought it would be. At some point, I grew very protective and possessive of this girl. I know he was her first, but every day I am with her makes me want her even more.
Theo’s threat in the store has been eating away at me and has kept me pissed off all day. I wanted to choke the life from him right there in the middle of the cereal aisle. But the voice of the angel filtered through and I let him go. For her sake.
All I can think is that it’s time for me to go. As much as I hate to admit it, Theo is right about one thing: I will never be good enough for her. He’s not either, but he’s got one foot in the door. I see it in her eyes. She loves him, even if he doesn’t deserve it.
She’s stubborn, though, and anytime I bring up leaving she comes up with something that she needs help with. And being the sucker I am, I agree to help. After all, I owe this woman.
Anniston has taken off out of the barn. I hurry to catch up before she circles back and adds yet another mile. My energy level is down from lack of sleep. I’ve been leaving the TV on, hoping that if I wake screaming she won’t hear it now that she has been sleeping upstairs in her actual bedroom. I was shocked to discover that the first week she slept in the guest room down the hall to stay close to me.
Don’t think about it, Cade. She isn’t yours. She’s that fuckhead’s.
Rounding the bend, my heart drops. Anniston is standing at the tree line, arms crossed with a smug-ass smile. “You know, I’m starting to think you just want to run another mile.”
I smile and shake my head. “No, I’m a little tired today. Dealing with Theo is exhausting.”
Her sweet laugh echoes amongst the trees. “I agree. Although, you look more than a little tired.” She gives me a knowing look. “I heard you last night but when I came down. The door was locked.”
I drop my head. She came to me. She came to comfort me even with the Cy Young winner in her bed.
“I’m sorry,” I whisper. “I didn’t wan
t to bother you with Theo here.”
She pushes off the tree and wraps her small arms around me. “I don’t need to remind you how important you are to me, do I, Major Jameson?”
Major. I haven’t been called that in a long time.
Anniston insists that I am and will always be a major. When I argued and told her I didn’t deserve the title anymore because I couldn’t bear to fail another team again, she patted my leg in her loving way, ignoring my admission and said, “Well, Major, I am your Commander in Briefs, but you can just call me Commander. Welcome to your new team.”
When she said that, I tried really hard not to let the moisture that accumulated in my eyes fall. It did anyway. And do you know what she did? She fucking kissed it and stood, retreating to her room. Leaving me to deal with all the emotions she’d just stirred up.
“Cade.”
“Hmm?” I look down at her small body wound around mine. I don’t know what I ever did to deserve such a woman like her in my life but I’ll take it, no matter if it’s for just a short time.
“I said, I think you need some rest.”
I didn’t even hear her the first time. Maybe I do need some sleep. “I’m sorry.”
“Don’t be. You’re tired.”
Always the forgiver. That’s how Theo is still in the picture, I bet. He has to fuck up. No way he’s been an angel to her this whole time.
“I want you to take a sleeping pill tonight.”
I shake my head. “I’m okay.”
“Well, good. I’m glad to hear it but you’re still taking it.” Always the smart-ass. She pulls away to show me that it’s futile to argue.
Sighing, I surrender. “Fine.”
“Great!” She tugs at my hand, pulling us down the hill toward the house.
I guess the run is over without the extra mile. Thank goodness. I don’t know if I could have handled it today.
“So, we’re going to Washington with Theo?” I haven’t asked about it since I overheard her conversation with Theo’s coach. Truthfully, I have been so nervous that she would leave without me that I didn’t want to jinx it.
I keep talking about leaving, but when it comes down to it, I really like living with her. I know it’s wrong and I don’t deserve it, but what can I say? I’m a selfish bastard.
