by J. M. Clark
The room was all white, as usual. The only furniture was a small white wooden table and two white chairs on each side. There was one window on the western wall of the room. It was bare, with no curtains to let in the sunlight. Mary felt comfortable in this room; she’d spent more time here than she would ever want to admit to anyone.
She withdrew her hand from Teacher Paul’s, smiled, and placed both hands in her lap. “Today I would like to discuss the children I have provided to the center.”
Teacher Paul sat back in his seat. “And what about those children would you like to discuss today, Mary?”
“I’m still having dreams about them…why?” She stared Teacher Paul in the face and lost the smile. The time for pleasantries had passed. This wasn’t supposed to happen. Those children were not hers, so why did she feel like she’d lost something? Why did she feel like a part of her—no, two pieces of her—had been extracted from her very soul and scattered about?
“Well, that’s a difficult question to answer, Mary. First of all, it is known that while the body does experience a certain amount of trauma during child birth, this can also affect chemicals in the brain. I can assure you that it will pass.”
“This is the same thing you said with the first child though. The dreams are still happening. I still remember delivering the children like it happened yesterday. I do plan on providing as many babies as my body will allow, but…is this something that I’m going to be dealing with going forward?” Mary’s voice began to crack a little. She cleared her throat and waited for his response, pushing the tears deep down.
“Mary, please do not become emotional. That is not necessary. What you are experiencing is a normal occurrence. I’ll explain further. Living here in the Palace affords you certain safeties.” He paused, adjusting his glasses on the bridge of his nose. “Safeties from both the physical harms and emotional harms that would often come to people in the Old World. Because you have been protected and suffered through very little pain physically or otherwise, when you do encounter a mental shock, and child birth would provide such a shock, it tends to stay with you for some time. Not because it’s abnormal for the human body, but because you have gone through so little before now. We have the safety of the Palace to thank for that, amen.” His brown eyes sparkled beneath his bifocals, and Mary could see that he was proud of that little explanation.
The look he gave her made Mary feel like she should be happy she was alive and lucky enough to live in this place. “I understand. I’d also like to ask, is it normal that I would like to see how they are doing? How they are growing? To see if I brought healthy children into the world? The second the child comes through the birth canal, they are bundled up and rushed down to the fourth floor. I’m feeling all kinds of things that we have been taught only came with the unclean way of living from before. I’ve never been outside of this place, so why am I dealing with some of these same issues?”
She adjusted her weight from one side of her body to the other, trying to find a comfortable sitting position or, more likely, to distract herself from the words that were coming out of her mouth. “Please don’t confuse my questions for anger, I just want to understand what’s going on inside of my body and why. I’m fully devoted to my mission of reaching the Greater Understanding Program. I’m just confused because I don’t feel the way I’m told I should. If that makes any sense.”
Mary was afraid she could be offending her teacher, and she didn’t know how far up these reports went. She knew that honesty was very important here, and she would never tell a lie, but she also didn’t want to risk being denied the Greater Understanding Program when she was up for review one day. Certain topics seemed to vex Teacher Paul a bit.
“Let me ask you something, Mary. Why do you believe we keep the mothers away from the children here in the Palace? Why do you believe the Order has decided this is the best course of action to take?” Teacher Paul studied her carefully, like she was an experiment in a biology class. He seemed to be looking inquisitively at her face—no, her eyes—for telltale signs of her true emotions on the matter.
“Well…it’s said that the idea of belonging to another caused great strife in the Old World. So many deaths, cheating, hurt feelings, and things of that nature—all based on the idea of ‘I Love You.’ Whether the feelings were a result of what was called parental-child love or man-woman love, they caused more harm than good. There was nothing inherently beneficial to this thing we called love; the only purpose that it could have served was self-satisfaction, or ownership.”
Mary rambled off this information as if she were reading it straight from a workbook. She knew her information on the flaws of the Old World, as anyone living in the Palace did. They did not work jobs. They did not get married. They did not fill their time with smart phones, video games, or other trivial things of that ilk from the past—those time-consuming tech devices were gone, left behind with the other harmful habits from before. No time was to be wasted doing anything that did not foster personal development.
These things were so loved in the Old World that they took precedence over everything else, the things that truly mattered. In the end, most didn’t realize the world was ending because they had their faces glued to a screen playing something called Candy Crush.
Teacher Paul uncrossed his legs and took a drink of water from the glass on the small white table. “Allow me to explain something to you. I think this will give you peace on our reasoning and why you should count yourself and the children you brought into this New World as fortunate.” He raised an eyebrow, seemingly asking her to consider what he was about to say.
“You see, Mary, children became ill-developed, traumatized by the things their parents were doing. Some grew up in terrible homes and were scarred throughout that time, making them unable to become contributing members of society by the time they came of age. As you would expect, this left the world in a fractured state for some time. The earth became riddled with humans who loved nothing about the planet except what it could do for them. They loved possessions, which in most cases became other people, but not in a caring way. The ‘love’ was acted out as dominion over the person as far as their children, family, friends, and love interests.
“We now know, and they even knew toward the end of the Old World, that love was not a thing, it was just a word that became empowered by the media, religions, and word of mouth. The idea of love made people believe that the feelings they had for one another, regardless of how flawed, gave them the right to do as they pleased to each other. It was common for people to think something along the lines of: ‘I could take your life, because I love this person and you wronged them,’ right? It sounds crazy, but it was very common before the sickness. ‘I love and own my child, therefor I will bestow upon him or her all of my own flaws and values, and I’ll proudly do so because it is my prerogative to impose upon this individual’s life, because I bore him into the world.’ It’s wrong on so many levels. What works for you may not work for that individual. What you can find peace with, they may not be able to. You understand my gist?”
Mary nodded to show Teacher Paul that she understood the point being made. “So the belief and recorded history of the mother-child relationship proves that inherently the mother would begin to interject her own values and such into the child?”
Teacher Paul nodded and slapped the table with one hand, so hard that the glass of water shook. “Correct, Mary. The thing that was thought to bring us closer was actually pushing us further apart and changing the trajectory of lives. The children you deliver should have every opportunity to become the people they choose to be. You attaching your own life experience and values would only provide a fork in the road that wouldn’t otherwise be there.
“Same with interpersonal relationships between adults. The perceived love makes you believe the person should bend to your will and do as you do. It’s all linked, so to avoid this, it’s best if we keep parents away from the children. The entire thought process
on giving life needed to be overhauled. Of course there would be some neurological pushback that surely will be bred out of us in the future. I believe you are feeling the effects of this pushback.”
“I want to help, that’s my purpose, but I do not want to feel terrible about it. I go to sleep feeling lousy most nights, empty almost. Have any of the other females expressed this to you?” Mary’s voice cracked as she gulped down her fears.
“Of course, of course. Listen, it’s important that you understand that you and the women of the Palace are helping the earth in such a huge way, and we all appreciate it. I’m going to urge you to stay the course, Mary. You are a very promising member of this Palace.”
Hearing those words from him made her feel better. She wasn’t alone; other females had these feelings. She would need to learn how to better deal with them. Her hard work was being noticed by the teachers, so maybe it was all worth it.
He reached back across the table, gesturing to Mary to hold his hand again. She complied. “Thank you, sir,” she said. “That means a lot to me, as do these talks.”
“That’s what I’m here for. Contact me anytime to discuss things that may be bothering you or things that don’t make sense within your body chemistry.” Holding her hand in his and caressing the top with his other hand, he smiled again and released Mary back to her floor.
Chapter Sixteen
Sirus
Sirus’s visitor sat at the massive desk by himself, nervous, picking at his fingernails anxiously. Andre had been sitting for a few minutes, and Sirus hadn’t spoken a word to him other than “Have a seat, my friend.” He stood next to the grandfather clock and measured Andre’s attitude, trying to figure out what he would like to say to him. The tension in the room was thick, the atmosphere not conducive to having a two-sided conversation. Sirus preferred that though. There wasn’t much this gentleman had to say that would tickle his fancy.
Right when the unease of the room reached its heaviest and most awkward peak, Sirus decided to speak. “I know this must feel odd to you, Andre. I’m quiet because it’s important to choose your words correctly when addressing a peer. I see you as such, so I will give you the respect that is due. May I speak freely, Andre?” Sirus didn’t budge from his spot in the darkness of the room, but he smiled at Andre. The clock provided the background music for his words.
“P-Please do, Sirus sir, please do.” Andre stuttered over his words.
Sirus began to move toward Andre, almost prowling across the mahogany-brown carpet. There was a reason his office was decorated in color rather than white. It gave the room a different kind of feel, like it had been plucked straight from the Old World. Everything here would be recognizable to Andre, but only because of what he had seen in books or magazines. Andre would feel strangely at home somehow, and at the same time fearful of the unknown. That was the whole purpose.
“In the Old World, there was a wealth of different religions. You have learned what a religion is, correct?” Sirus started walking laps around the room, staring at Andre.
“Yes, sir.”
“Good, good. Now, I am going to give you some information on an important tool of one very special religion during the end of the Old World. There was a religious sect that went by the name of Christianity. I won’t get into the origin or how it came to be, the Council of Nicaea, Rome, or that whole mess of circumstances that put it all together. You wouldn’t understand anyway. You only need to understand the purpose of religion and whom it served to follow this particular tale.”
Andre ran his hands over the tight curly kinks of his hair. Sirus could see he was getting warm. Maybe even starting to sweat.
“In any case, Christianity’s main figures were good and evil, light and dark, or God and Satan. Satan, ironically, was a creation of the God figure in this story. You may ask yourself: Why would a god, who was said to be perfect, go and create his own opposition? Apart from becoming insanely bored with your mindless followers and wanting to have some fun, I’m not sure why anyone would do such a thing.
“Doesn’t make any practical sense, but not much did in those days, so it was allowed to prosper for thousands of years. This idea that the world was ruled by both a perfect God and an evil entity called Satan, or the devil, still flourished. Are you still with me, Andre?” Sirus stopped pacing and raised an eyebrow at him, checking his response.
“If I’m understanding you, there was a religious group that ruled the world prior to the sickness, and the key figures were the good and evil avatars that are present in virtually every religious idea. This follows the same path of what we have been taught about belief systems in morning enrichments.” Andre had a hopeful gleam in his eyes, trying to appease Sirus with his answer.
Now standing behind his chair, which was pushed into the desk, Sirus grabbed the back of the chair and leaned in. “Bingo, young Andre. Very good. I’m impressed.”
Sirus pulled the chair from the desk and took a seat. He balled his fist and covered it with his other hand, placing them on the desk in front of him and leaning forward casually. Sitting like a proper young lad, not the way you would expect a man of his rank or stature to sit. It was almost playful.
“This Satan figure was an angel in God’s army of angel friends that he created for himself. If you haven’t noticed yet, this is a very lonely God. He goes around creating all kinds of issues for himself. This angel, Satan, was special in many ways among all the others.
“Satan became jealous of God, gathers some friends, and attempts to overthrow the big guy or some nonsense like that. God finds out about the coup and banishes the bad angels, including Satan, from Heaven.”
Andre blinked, his eyes questioning.
“Oh, sorry. Heaven is the magical, all-loving place where they all lived together. Satan and his merry band of evil angels are banished to Earth, which so happens to be where God also created man. Hell, what a place to send the evilest creation ever concocted, right? Talk about not giving men a fair shot at this thing called life, right?”
Sirus winked at him, and he was suddenly attacked with a fit of laughter that lasted for a minute or so. The whole time, Andre sat in his seat on the other side of the desk, grasping the arms of the chair.
It was clear by the look on Andre’s face that he thought Sirus was crazy.
“I’m sorry, please forgive me. Foresight is the gift of the aged, I know. Allow me to continue. Satan is now on Earth with man, and he notices they are doing pretty good for themselves. Well, there are only two humans, Adam and Eve. Male and female, of course. They run and frolic throughout the Garden of Eden, and God has one caveat for these two perfect bastards living in happiness forever. Just don’t eat from a certain tree in the garden!”
Andre laughed. Sirus could hear the forced enthusiasm, but the fear was present in his eyes; the eyes told no lies.
“That was it. They could eat of everything else in the garden, just not the fruit from one specific tree. This tree had fruit that would give the humans knowledge of all things good and evil. They would become aware of their nudity, and everything outside of their blissful ignorance. Satan, the evil one, somehow becomes a snake, and talks Eve into eating the forbidden fruit. She then talks Adam into doing it with her. Women have always had the power of persuasion, gotta watch ‘em!”
Sirus pounded his fist against the desk with a laugh, making Andre jump nearly a foot in the air. “The foolish humans eat the fruit, God gets angry…imagine that. God then declares that all men will pay for that sin with their souls in hell, which is run by his old running mate, Satan. Ahh, you see, you see? Tricky, right? Admit it—this story is crazy in all the right ways, huh?” Sirus glared from across the desk and spun the golden globe once, awaiting Andre’s response.
Andre seemed to relax a bit at seeing Sirus’s playful smile. He finally gave Sirus a smile back. “It’s all nonsensical, in my opinion. I follow the story, but do you mean to tell me that people ever believed in such rubbish?” Andre sank into his chair
in relative comfort.
“I do, young Andre, I do. In fact, lots of the people in this very Palace were Christians in the Old World. All that stuff is now outlawed, so you wouldn’t hear them speaking about it. I’d even wager your parents or grandparents were Christians. You were only six or seven years old when you were found in your aunt’s rundown apartment and brought here during the sickness. It’s not odd that you wouldn’t remember any of this.” Again rising from his seat, Sirus glided over to Andre’s side of the desk and sat on the edge, right next to him.
With one leg dangling and the other firmly planted on the ground, he looked down at the young man and saw the fear twinkling in his eyes beneath the soft brown irises. Hazel was the name of that color.
This troubled Sirus. He didn’t want fear—he preferred understanding and for the lesson to be known.
“I’ll wrap up my story for you, Andre. So…the Satan character seduces Adam and Eve to bite the forbidden fruit, and this condemns all of man to hellfire and brimstone. God later allows cooler heads to prevail and creates himself in human form by impregnating the wife of another man. God in human form, which was known as the savior Jesus Christ, becomes a profit and performs miracles and such, but he is later killed by the government. Three days later, he rises back into the clouds to be with the ‘real’ God, and BOOM!”
Sirus again smacked the desk hard, right in front of Andre’s face, shaking the globe statue in the center. He couldn’t resist spooking Andre further. It was just too easy.
“The terrible thing that Adam and Eve did was forgiven…kinda. I mean, in the Old World, they still believed you could go to hell if you didn’t accept the baby Jesus character as your lord and savior. For the most part though, you could do whatever the fuck you wanted to do to the planet and still wind up in Heaven with that joke of a creator.”
