Falling

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by Belinda McBride


  But as years had passed into decades, he’d grown accustomed to life on the remote farm. He’d been forced to vacate his home in ‘death’ and resettle as his own relative on occasion. But unlike so many other crofters, he owned his land, and his uncanny skills kept him well fed, even as the crops of his neighbors withered and failed. In recent years, the villagers who sought out his healing skills had begun to look at him oddly, knowing that his appearance belied his age. It was once again time for a change. But this time, Rex didn’t want to wander for years, letting time dim his neighbors’ memories. He didn’t wish to leave at all.

  His cottage had been an ugly heap of stone and rotten thatch when he’d first arrived. He’d rebuilt and expanded the ancient structure, plastering and whitewashing the walls, putting stone floors over the dirt and thick rugs over the chilly slate. It was small, but cozy and warm.

  A stand of ancient forest grew on his property and water was abundant. There was game and fish, and the soil was enriched by Rex’s mere presence. But some of his herbs didn’t flourish in the cold, damp weather of lowland Scotland. He sometimes traveled to the city for those items.

  Rex had other reasons to travel to the city as well. He grew lonely on occasion, not only for companionship, but for touch, for the presence of his own kind. In the older sections of the city, there were places he could go…

  Places he could take Hunter for some much-needed experience among Rex’s kind. There were women there, ladies who were skilled in the arts of lovemaking. Men, as well, but Hunter needed the exposure to women in order to discover his own preference.

  And if they encountered some of the elders, perhaps one would be willing to take responsibility for Hunter. Rex simply didn’t have the skills to mentor one of the Fallen. His indiscretion had proved that. Once he found a place for the angel, Rex could travel for a time, then return to his beloved farm as a young man, a nephew or cousin, and begin his life once again.

  A faint wisp of smoke rose from the chimney of the house. Very soon there would be hot water for tea, as well as porridge and oatcakes.

  Rex would miss Hunter’s cooking when he was gone.

  He shook the water from his hair in a spray of rainbow-covered droplets, and turned to the barn, ready to begin the day.

  Chapter Four

  “You’d best take that look from your face, unless you want one of these men to take it off for you.”

  Rex grinned at Hunter, who grimaced at the pervasive smell of Edinburgh’s Old City. Summer added enough warmth to lift the fetid smells of sewage and rot to life. Earlier they’d ventured into the newer part of town. Elegant houses and gardens rose where a small loch once shimmered. So much change in the course of a lifetime. It was sad and exciting and a wee bit scary.

  For now, they’d keep to the old byways and alleys off the Royal Mile up in the old part of the city.

  “The odor is offensive.”

  “Aye, but you don’t need to advertise it to one and all.” Rex reached out and pulled Hunter away from the center of the road, barely in time to save him from being trampled by a carriage. Together they walked steadily uphill toward the castle.

  “Is that where we’re going?” Hunter tripped on a cobblestone and quickly caught his balance. His gaze was fixed in the direction of the imposing Edinburgh Castle.

  “Nay, we’ll be traveling elsewhere today.” To prove his point, Rex turned down a narrow passageway. From there, he turned again and wound through alleys till the space between buildings was barely shoulder width. Cobblestones gleamed with moisture and damp moss and rats scrambled away in near invisibility.

  “There’s much to this city that few know about, or would dream of.” Rex paused at a stairway, allowing Hunter time to absorb his surroundings. The noise of the busy streets had faded, and rather than sewage and rot, he smelled moist earth and life. Once Hunter’s eyes had returned to him, Rex began to descend a stairway.

  “I didn’t see that until you stepped down!”

  Rex grinned at his amazement. He had the feeling that Hunter would never grow bored with magic. His smile faded a bit as he thought about the awesome power that Hunter held, if he only knew how to access it. He hoped the angel would never grow disenchanted or cynical.

  They continued to descend until a door blocked their passage. Rather than knock, Rex gestured, sketching runes in the air. The amulet around his neck began to glow with a gentle white light. He paused, counted and repeated the complex pattern in reverse.

  The door vanished.

  “Follow me. We’ll go through the defensive wards next.” He reached behind and caught Hunter’s hand, settling it on his shoulder. Hunter squeezed and readjusted his grip. Rex did his best to ignore the sensation of the angel’s touch.

  Together they moved cautiously through a long passageway. Slowly, the lights dimmed until Rex was barely able to see. The glow of the necklace was the only light visible. He reached up and gave Hunter’s hand a comforting squeeze. Though he’d been through the magical wards many times, it was still intimidating.

  Once they approached the end of the corridor, magic brushed against his skin, swirling and prodding in inquiry. Without warning, the charms on both men failed, and they were both revealed in their true forms. In the golden light cast by Hunter, Rex could clearly see several figures in the shadows.

  “It is I, Reux, son of Barron and Mareigh.” He swallowed, feeling a bit uneasy. “I bring with me the Fallen named Kokabiel, now known as Rion Hunter.”

  The silence stretched for long moments. Next to him, Hunter stood still as a statue. Odd, he’d never wondered what the angel would do in times of danger. Would he fight? Stand by in bewilderment? The balanced tension in his stance led Rex to believe that he was a fighter.

  “Reux Barronson.”

  He grinned. This was a voice he knew well.

  “Enter and be welcome.”

  The walls of the corridor shifted and the fragrance of flowers drifted on the air. The entire world shifted into something completely different.

  It was good to be home.

  * * * *

  Though he couldn’t remember clearly, Hunter knew he’d walked among beings of great power in his previous life. But he didn’t remember ever meeting one who awed him quite as completely as this woman. It might be that she was female, and he’d met few women in his short life on Earth. It could be her bearing and stateliness, or even her sheer beauty. This woman radiated a power that he was unable to define. To his horror, blood rushed to his groin, even as it rose to his face.

  As she moved toward them, Rex dropped to both his knees. After a brief moment, Hunter followed suit, feeling quite comfortable abasing himself to the woman. When he looked up, her visage appeared youthful as a child, yet aged as a crone. Silver-white hair cascaded from a knot at the top of her head, the color shifted from frozen blonde to winter gray. He blinked and the illusion ceased, leaving a lovely woman of middle years standing above him.

  Goodness. Kindness. That’s what he felt tugging at his consciousness. She had no sense of ambition or greed.

  “Reux, I have missed you.” The woman trailed a hand through Rex’s hair, following the curve of one of his curls. “I wish your mother could see you now.” She smiled sadly, and Hunter felt the pull of her grief.

  After greeting Rex, she knelt to look directly into Hunter’s eyes. Hers were cool gray, deep and endless as the coldest loch. They were guarded by feathery black lashes.

  He felt a pull in the back of his mind, something shifted, sparks kissed his vision, and without meaning to, Hunter felt himself slide into her mind. With a hitch in his breath, he realized that this newly awakened ability was familiar.

  “I’m sorry.” He quickly withdrew, and she smiled at his embarrassment.

  “No offense was taken. I invited you. That ability was dormant until now?” He nodded, afraid to look directly into her eyes. His impressions of her were correct. She was a being of great power and unsurpassed humility. But she was far from
harmless. “You are indeed Kokabiel then, God’s Star.” She slid her hand over his cheek in a gentle embrace. “Do you know why you are called that name?”

  He shook his head slowly.

  “You shine the light of knowledge. That is the key to your fall, Hunter. You shine light in the dark places we all possess. Even the highest of the angels must have secrets, I suppose.”

  “Hunter, this is Brita. She’s the Guardian of this place, and the sister of my mother.”

  Not knowing what else to do, he bowed deeply, feeling the slide of her hand on his cheek as it slipped away. He had no adequate words of greeting, and could only demonstrate his feeling by prostrating himself before her.

  “Please, Hunter. I am not deserving.” Gently, she took his hand and pulled him upright, but now, he saw only a lovely woman standing before him. She’d shielded her glamour.

  No longer dazzled by the Guardian, Hunter looked around and blinked. The dank cavern was now a spacious and light-filled chamber. Outside glass windows, fields of green stretched endlessly. Birds sang sweetly and the sound of children’s laughter carried on the fragrant breeze. It reminded him of home, though it was so vastly different. The walls surrounding him were stone and wood instead of gilt and marble. Outside, plants and trees grew riotously, rather than in ordered plantings.

  “This is a place out of time, which is why it seems familiar to you. Here, no person hungers or is forgotten. But for you, it is only a temporary haven, I’m sorry to say.”

  She began to walk down the corridor and the two men fell into stride next to her. Glancing at Rex, he saw that his friend looked relaxed, but still carried the tension he’d shown over the past months. While he didn’t want to admit it, Hunter knew that Rex’s unhappiness was rooted in his own presence. A feeling he recognized as guilt had begun to take hold in his soul, steadily eroding his growing joy in discovering this world.

  His fledgling emotions had received ruthless treatment since that morning by the fireside. He’d offended Rex somehow, but didn’t have the experience to understand what was wrong. Hunter knew only that need and want churned in his gut—the need for Rex’s smile and foolish jokes. He yearned for the touch that had been offered so briefly.

  Hunter had learned much of sexual matters in the ensuing months. He’d seen the act among animals both large and small, and once he’d gained control of his wings, Rex painted charms upon his skin that hid his more angelic features from the human eye. This allowed him to meet the men and women living nearby.

  In the villages they visited, Hunter spied couples in the act, though it was vastly different from the brief, often violent copulations of horses and farm cats. The courtships among the humans heated his blood and brought him to a cockstand. To his chagrin, arousal visited him often and at unexpected times. Sometimes he went hard when he woke in the morning or lay down with his thoughts at night. More than once he’d gone erect upon spying a curvy woman. The worst embarrassment came when he glanced up and saw Rex framed in the doorway or whistling over the mortar and pestle. It was then that Hunter would turn away in shame, because he knew that his open face did not hide his emotions, and he didn’t want to offend Rex.

  The need swelled his cock, but more importantly, it caused his heart to ache. He craved not only Rex’s touch, but his presence, his approval. He ached for the return of Rex’s happiness. And Hunter simply didn’t know what to do to make his friend happy. Of all the changes and adjustments he’d had to make, grappling with emotion was the most challenging.

  Hunter wondered what sort of creature he’d been before his fall.

  He finally set his unhappy thoughts aside and looked around. They’d left the spacious chamber and were now outside, walking along a vine-shrouded walkway. Grapes dangled in heavy bunches from the greenery and golden light dappled the flowing skirts of Brita’s light green gown. They came to an exit in the arbor. It led to a wildly beautiful courtyard.

  “Hunter, with your leave, I’d like to speak to my nephew privately. We have been long apart and have much to discuss.” She smiled as she spoke. “I’m certain you must hunger and thirst, so I won’t keep him long.”

  Hunter nodded and wandered off, admiring the profuse plant life, watching small birds hover in the air, flitting from flower to flower. When he turned to ask a question, they were both gone.

  * * * *

  “You’ve taken your time bringing him to us.”

  “It seemed best.”

  They walked out into the open where their voices would be lost to the air. Rex breathed deeply, smelling the perfume of warm earth and growing things. After living so long in a climate of fog and cold, the Other Place was always a welcome luxury.

  When she found an appropriate spot, Brita gestured for him to sit. For a moment, she smiled at the antics of two youngsters trying their wings for the first time. “I still remember your first attempt to fly.”

  “I soared so beautifully, and then landed in the lake.” He smiled at the memory. “It was so long ago.”

  “It was only yesterday.” And to Brita, it might very well seem that way. As Guardian of the Homeland, she had stewardship over time and space, if she chose to exercise it. When he returned to Edinburgh, she could deliver him to the point he entered, or years into the future, if she saw the need.

  “Aunt, I have no experience with the Fallen. I’m afraid that I’ve erred in my handling of Kokabiel.”

  “In what way?”

  He didn’t answer immediately, thinking of all the mistakes he’d made, both great and small. Even now, his mind skipped over the real truth. He drew a deep breath and looked directly into her knowing eyes.

  “I find myself infatuated with him—sexually.”

  She smiled and looked up to the sky, watching a bird soaring in the air. “It would be difficult not to be drawn to such beauty. I have a question for you, Reux. Do you love him?”

  “Love?” He shook his head, laughing off the very idea. “There’s so little to him to fall in love with. Right now, Hunter is nothing but a bundle of questions and confusion. I should have had him here sooner. I should have taken him to the village, exposed him to others.”

  “There is much to love about your angel, Reux. He merely needs time to learn. His basic personality is intact. He has forgotten all that he was. Now he’s taking the time to learn who he will be.”

  She watched a bird flutter through the sky. “He cares for you deeply. In fact, I would say you are the most important aspect to his existence.”

  “But that is wrong! He’s had no opportunity to meet other people, to see the world and learn what’s out there.”

  “And so you brought him here.” Where he would be sheltered from the very world he would live in.

  He looked away, shame touching his face. “He needs more than I can give, Aunt. How can he learn to exist among humans by living with me on a croft in the middle of nowhere?”

  “Perhaps then you should take him out into the world. Away from your island.”

  Reux went still. Leave Scotland? It was his home—the land he was bonded to. He could leave his croft for a time, but he always stayed close, never traveling far.

  “I was sent here. To Scotland.”

  “By the seers. Why do you suppose they sent you exactly where you now live?”

  “I was to watch the sky.”

  “Indeed.”

  That had been the reason they had sent him there and abandoned him. To intercept the Fallen. Kokabiel. He was to keep the angel isolated until he’d either adapted or gone mad. Angels were immortal, and few humans could stand in battle against their cold, emotionless determination. And when an angel went bad… Well, there was Hell to pay. Literally.

  “I’m to kill him if he doesn’t adapt.”

  “There is no choice,” she agreed.

  Hunter was adapting, he was learning and coping with his new existence.

  “I don’t think that will come to pass.” But the angel hadn’t had enough time, not yet.
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br />   “Aunt, he needs to be around others. He needs—” Reux broke off, clearing his throat. “He needs to experience women… Men. He needs to do this without me as a distraction. If you allow him to stay, perhaps find someone else…”

  Catching the look on her face, shame wound through Rex’s soul. “Aunt, I can’t keep him with me any longer. Maybe later, when he’s had time here…”

  He could take Hunter out into the world for a few years, get him on his feet, then perhaps Rex could return to his croft. He’d come back young and with a new name. Perhaps he’d be an artist or a craftsman.

  He’d be back to his own life, to his croft and his animals and his daily isolation. He’d be back to watching the sky for falling stars.

  He’d be alone.

  Rex glanced over at Brita. She’d slipped into hag mode, where her thoughts were deep and far-seeing. Catching his glance, she slid back into the present.

  “You are confused. You don’t know if you wish to keep him or give him away. You don’t understand your feelings for the angel, and that is dangerous, Reux. He could kill you or he could love you. You were right to finally bring him to me. And you did wait too long.” She looked out into the distance, seeing something that Rex was blind to. “Go join him for your meal. Did you have any plans in the city?”

  “I need to purchase supplies. Some herbs for medicines.”

  “Do what you must then return to me. I’ll have made my decision by then.”

  Chapter Five

  He was only acting in the best interest of the angel. So why did he feel like shit?

  Rex watched as the merchant rolled his purchases into an oilcloth packet. He handed over the coin and nodded, slipping the medicines down into his travel pouch.

  Hunter would be treated well while Rex was gone. He would have endless opportunities to learn and grow, to know others—to make love and to fall in love. In the Other Place, there were libraries and instruments for making music. He had space to fly, to practice swordplay or learn a trade. Hunter would never grow bored. Even on the remote croft, he was always learning, always questioning. Surrounded by the many clans of the Sidhe, he would flourish. He’d be safe from the dangers that stalked him here in the Earthly existence. If he truly fell, Hunter would be among the Sidhe rather than humans, and they would know what to do.

 

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