Nathan tried to push paranoid thoughts away. Thinking like that wouldn’t help. It was hard not to, however. He didn’t realize how very easy casual sex had been, hooking up with guys with little more than two words said. You got what you wanted and it was over. Easy as pie. But he was bored of that; he’d wanted to go on an actual date and have conversation.
So… here he was! On a date. And Nathan didn’t have a clue what to do. He just wished Auryn would give him some kind of sign. He suspected the guy was shyer than he let on, but shyness wasn’t an invitation to jump in his lap. Until A Bar Tender Tale | Melanie Tushmore 65
Nathan got some sort of indication, he didn’t want to risk getting knocked back.
One positive outcome was that Auryn paid for dinner.
He practically insisted Nathan didn’t spend a penny. If he was a solicitor, he was bound to have more money than Nathan’s meager wages brought in, so Nathan didn’t mind. It was nice to be treated for once, even if he wasn’t sure where this left them.
A negative outcome was Auryn brought up Gary again.
He made a joke suggesting that if he rang Gary and told him to wait at the end of George Street, they could throw the remainder of dinner down the short road to him. Nathan was at a loss to reply. He almost expected Auryn to suggest they go back to The Jury’s after they left.
That was the last thing Nathan wanted to do.
He stood on St. James Street in the early evening light and waited. When Auryn came out to join him, he wasn’t carrying a takeaway bag like Nathan had been expecting. He asked if Nathan fancied trying that new bar at the bottom of the road, the one with the themed décor and mood lighting.
So now they were going for a drink? That was another positive outcome, right? Nathan was still confused, but of course he said yes. The new bar was called Adonis and was quite obviously gay. It had a plaster-cast imitation of a Greek statue in the window and was boldly decorated in red and silver tones with voluptuous seating.
There was nothing like sitting in a new bar, before the seats got totally ruined. Nathan ran his hand over the plush velvet of the booth he sat in and thought that the new owners must be very brave to splash out on expensive covers A Bar Tender Tale | Melanie Tushmore 66
like these. The bar was quiet, but it was early on a midweek evening. The music they played was ambient dub, a welcome change from the pounding pop music Nathan was usually subjected to in Kemp Town.
Auryn returned to their seat with a pitcher of Long Island Iced Tea and two glasses. Nathan wasn’t sure what to expect from tonight, but if he drank enough of that cocktail, his impatient libido might steer the course.
This had to be a good sign, surely? Auryn had to like him if he wanted to sit here after dinner, drinking in a gay bar. But he still hadn’t made a move. Maybe he was just shy?
That left it up to Nathan to flirt.
Well, why not? Surely this was worth taking a shot at?
Right!
Auryn asked him about drinks and tried to have a normal conversation while Nathan attempted to give him the eye. He asked about Nathan’s work and if he made cocktails the way they did in the Tom Cruise film. Nathan laughed, his flirting momentarily forgotten while he described his best efforts at glass throwing ended up in black eyes for his colleagues at best and a lot of smashed glass on the floor at worst.
It was easy to laugh and make jokes with Auryn, but Nathan began to feel frustrated at their lack of progress in anything else. He drank quickly to take the edge off. Nathan didn’t usually need alcoholic assistance with flirting, but he did tonight. He didn’t really get much chance to drink these A Bar Tender Tale | Melanie Tushmore 67
days, and that sinfully strong cocktail was going straight to his head.
Before he got too tipsy, Nathan tried to up the ante. He slid closer in the booth and bumped knees with Auryn under the table. Auryn tried to keep the conversation tame, but Nathan refused to play ball; anything he said now was simply loaded with veiled invitation and double meaning.
Auryn still didn’t respond. It was like he politely ignored Nathan’s come-ons.
Why wasn’t he flirting? This man seemed to have an uncanny ability of distracting him into a different conversation before Nathan realized what he was doing.
Nathan’s answer to this was to keep drinking. It felt like he had gone from only slightly tipsy to quite drunk in just a few sips. Although it did give him the determination to keep going.
Falling back on his tried and tested move to get a guy to touch him, Nathan decided to show off his tattoos. He offered each arm forward and pointed to each tattoo, explaining what they were. Being a typical nerd, there was a story behind each of them. Auryn paid close attention, even held Nathan’s arms politely when Nathan thrust them upon him.
“They’re great,” Auryn said.
“Wait, there’s more!”
Nathan shucked off his army shirt and very slightly pushed up what remained of the sleeve on his T-shirt. Just visible on his shoulder blade was the edge of his back piece, a pair of bat wings in black and grey. Nathan was thrilled to A Bar Tender Tale | Melanie Tushmore 68
feel Auryn’s fingers trace along the skin of his shoulder, perhaps lingering a few moments longer than necessary.
“Very nice. You’ve got quite a collection.”
“Yes,” Nathan smiled wickedly. “There’s a couple more I can show you… but I’d have to do that in private.” Catching his eye, Auryn pulled himself back. He looked faintly surprised.
Dammit, Nathan thought. He was just about to take it back and say he was only joking… then he noticed Auryn’s hands pulling out his mobile phone. Nathan watched avidly as he brought up a screen then placed the phone on the table, sliding it around to face him. The screen was flashing on New Contact.
“Would you put your number in?” Auryn asked. He wasn’t quite looking Nathan in the eye as he asked. It was beyond adorable.
At last! Nathan snatched up the phone, a sleek, heavy model, and carefully entered in his number. “Why?” he teased. “What are you going to do with it?”
“I was hoping I could call you.”
“What for?” Nathan finished adding his details in and slid the phone back to Auryn. He left his fingers drumming slowly on the table.
“What for?” Auryn repeated with a chuckle. “Oh, I don’t know… maybe I’d like to see you again.” When he clasped his hand over the phone, Nathan reached out; the opportunity to touch that hand was just too tempting.
“You’re seeing me now.”
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Auryn looked surprised but quickly covered it up. He pulled his hand back under the pretense of putting his phone away. Nathan pulled his hand back too, more hurt by that one action than he’d been prepared for.
“Look, Nathan, I’m not making presumptions about you or anything….”
Nathan’s fighting spirit deflated at the sound of that, but what Auryn said next was so unexpected Nathan’s jaw almost hit the table.
“I think it’s only fair if I tell you that I’m not really into casual things,” Auryn explained. “I mean, I’d rather take things slowly and get to know you.”
“Um, really?” Nathan was surprised.
“That is… if you want to?”
He felt so elated, Nathan didn’t think twice about leaning forward to press his lips against Auryn’s. He closed his eyes as their mouths melted together soft and warm. For one glorious moment Nathan was kissing him. Then he felt himself being gently but firmly pushed away. Nathan opened his eyes.
“What’s wrong?”
“Nothing,” Auryn said quietly. “But there’s no need to rush.”
“Oh.” Nathan blushed furiously. This wasn’t how things were supposed to go! Now he felt really stupid. Panicking, he excused himself and sought refuge in the gent’s.
Nathan dithered around inside the gent’s trying to decide what to do. He’d hoped coming in here would sober A Bar Tender Tale | Melani
e Tushmore 70
him up, but it was having the opposite effect. The colored lighting didn’t help either.
He didn’t understand what was wrong. Nathan was more than happy to take things slowly. It sounded great, in fact… but no kissing? It was just a kiss! Either you wanted to kiss someone or you didn’t. Why didn’t Auryn want to kiss him?
Nathan scrabbled for his phone and punched out a text plea to Stuart: “If a guy takes you out but doesn’t want to kiss you, what the hell do you do? Help me!” It was getting on for 8 p.m. Stuart would have finished work long ago. Nathan hoped he had his phone nearby, whatever he was doing. How long could he wait in the toilets? Out of habit he checked himself in the mirror, only to be reminded that his hair was a mess and he looked like a scruffball today.
Arrgh. Nathan turned away from the mirror and glared at his phone, willing it to receive a message.
Lady luck was certainly being up and down tonight. A message came back from Stuart after only one minute:
“WTF? Who is it? He sounds confused! XOXO.” Nathan rolled his eyes at the XO’s. Yeah, rub it in, he thought. He replied just as quickly: “I met him today. I think we’re on a date but he won’t kiss me. Suggestions, please?” Waiting for Stuart’s next reply seemed like an age. When it did come it was only a one word answer.
“Straight! XOXO.”
Nathan made a face at his phone. “Oh shut up,” he grumbled, about to text back.
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Just then the door to the bar opened. Nathan jumped, saw it was Auryn, and immediately felt guilty. He shoved his phone away but not before Auryn had seen. Those dark eyes had spotted the phone, then rose up to look at Nathan, who was currently dying of embarrassment.
Oh, this is a nightmare!
“Are you okay?” Auryn asked.
“Yeah, sure,” Nathan said, trying to be casual. “I was just replying to a message.”
There was a definite pause, then Auryn’s quiet admission, “I feel like I’ve upset you.”
“What? No, it’s fine,” Nathan insisted, trying not to pout.
When Auryn moved to stand in front of him Nathan twisted his body to the side, shying away.
“I have upset you, haven’t I?” Auryn’s voice was firm but gentle. Nathan wondered if he used that voice in his work, to patiently explain something complicated to someone who just didn’t get it. Nathan felt like that now: utterly stupid. As he slouched against the wall, he was eye level with Auryn’s broad chest. Nathan’s gaze was distracted by the bare patch of skin at the open collar; it looked so smooth, so inviting….
Oh God.
Nathan was sure if he hadn’t been so drunk and frustrated, he wouldn’t be making an idiot of himself right now. He couldn’t answer, though; he was all out of ideas. He willed Auryn to do something to rescue this awkward situation.
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Auryn took a deep breath. He reached forward and gently touched Nathan’s hand, as if he wanted to hold onto it but was unsure if he’d be welcome.
“I’m sorry, Nathan. Talk to me. Please?” Nathan frowned, more from confusion than anything else. He looked up at Auryn and asked, “About what?”
“Tell me… um, well, you’re going to have to tell me what you want.”
What? Nathan’s common sense was warring with his gut feeling. One was telling him to cut and run while the other was begging him to hold on.
Oh well. Nothing ventured, he thought.
Nathan wound his own fingers around Auryn’s hand, trying not to press too tight. “I don’t know how…. I mean, how much more direct can I be? Can’t you guess what I want?”
Auryn’s fingers squeezed him. Their bodies started to mirror each other silently. “Yes,” Auryn told him. “But… I like you, Nathan. I don’t want a one-off thing….” He likes me?
Nathan straightened up in response, sulk forgotten. His heart had gone from a mild flutter to a frantic pounding.
“Um… that’s not…. I mean, I’m not really into one-off things either; it’s not what I’m looking for. I mean….” He bit his lip. It seemed the only way to stop his nervous rush of words. He took a breath in, hating that it sounded so shaky.
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“That’s fine, Nathan,” Auryn said carefully. “That’s the idea of taking it slow. But I have to ask, are you sure? I am a lot older than you.”
“Not so much.”
“It’s almost ten years.”
Nathan took in another breath. He supposed a fact like that should really make him think twice about all this, should make him be more cautious. But try as he might, he couldn’t see a bad side to it. So what if there was a few years difference? They already got on well anyway. Maybe dating someone older would be better for him?
What suddenly popped into the devious part of Nathan’s mind was thinking about all those years of experience in the bedroom being lavished upon him. A smile tried to tug at his lips. Did it say something about him that the devious part always won out? Trying to keep his words calm to show he was serious, Nathan said, “I know, but it… really doesn’t bother me.”
“Are you sure?”
That’s it, Nathan thought. That’s what Auryn wanted to hear. He could literally see the cool mask melting away from the other man’s face, his eyes started to flare up as they looked at each other.
“Yes, I’m sure.”
They were still holding hands after all. They both wanted this, Nathan was certain now. Trying to move things along a tiny bit, Nathan found Auryn’s free hand and gently guided it to rest at his waist. Actions spoke louder than words, after all. This was the simplest gesture he could think A Bar Tender Tale | Melanie Tushmore 74
of to get his point across without possibly scaring the man away.
Though judging by the sudden look of apprehension that crept into his eyes, Nathan worried he might have already done that.
“Nathan, I don’t know,” Auryn said, sounding unsure.
“Didn’t you just break up with your boyfriend?”
“That meant nothing,” Nathan said quickly, then instantly regretted it. He could feel Auryn begin to move away, his hands trying to escape from Nathan’s eager fingers.
“What I meant was,” Nathan backpedaled. “It was going nowhere for a long time. We’re too different. I want… um, different stuff.”
Nathan was relieved to feel Auryn’s fingers grasp at his again, his body returning to press into him, just a touch closer than before.
“Like what, Nathan? What are you looking for?”
“Um… I can tell you, but you aren’t allowed to… I dunno, laugh or anything.”
“I won’t.”
“I mean it,” Nathan warned.
“I’d never laugh at you.”
“All right.” Nathan felt his cheeks flush hot. “I do want a boyfriend.”
“What sort of boyfriend?” Auryn asked.
“A… um, just… someone that wants to… you know, spend time with me.”
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“That sounds good.”
“Yeah….”
Auryn was staring at him, his dark eyes burning. When he didn’t answer Nathan’s gaze flitted between the man’s eyes and his lips, as if trying to convey what he wanted. He so wanted to taste those lips again.
“So, um… yeah.” Why isn’t he moving?
Nathan decided to go for broke. He was getting impatient. “Look, Auryn, are you going to kiss me, or are we just going to stare at each other?”
“Do you want me to kiss you?”
He felt sure he was being teased now. Teasing was better than going nowhere, but that wasn’t quite enough.
Nathan couldn’t resist a wicked smile as he grabbed the front of Auryn’s shirt and pulled him in. He had to rise up on tiptoes to meet his mouth, but it was so worth it.
This time when they kissed, Nathan could feel the need in the other
man’s lips as they melted against each other, breathing hard. It was as if all that simmering tension building up before had been revved up in a hot microwave.
Heat was stirring between them, and Nathan drank it in greedily, kissing Auryn for all he was worth. He mused absently that he’d been right; that stubble on Auryn’s face was soft enough not to hurt. It was just hard enough to scratch lightly and make him want more.
Nathan felt himself pressed up against the wall as their kiss deepened. And for all Auryn’s talk about taking it slow, he could feel the man’s hips nudging his, the delicious friction against his cock drawing a moan from his throat.
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“Sorry, guys,” a voice interrupted, ruining the moment.
Nathan was severely disappointed that Auryn jumped away, as they both looked over at one of the staff, who was wearing a knowing smile. “Sorry, but the boss doesn’t allow that here. And if we can’t do it, no one else can either.” Auryn seemed embarrassed, but Nathan let out a rueful chuckle.
They retreated back to their seat in the bar and their forgotten drinks. Nathan did mention that his home was only a short walk up the road, but Auryn skirted around his blatant invitation with the promise of, “Maybe another time.” It wasn’t quite a refusal, Nathan supposed. There was definitely a promise of something happening here. He conceded, even though it seemed unlikely he would actually
“get lucky” tonight, he already felt lucky. Auryn had noticeably relaxed. He seemed to want to know more about Nathan and his life, judging by all the questions he kept asking. Nathan didn’t mind at all, as long as Auryn kept holding his hand.
They talked over two more pitchers of cocktail. It was sweet and flirtatious, the kind of getting-to-know-you talk that Nathan hadn’t felt this excited about in a long time.
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