by Jasmin Quinn
And then as she thought of Mr. Jackman, she regretted leaving the compound, ashamed of her insolence, her stubbornness. Wishing she could call him, tell him these things, ask him to bring her home. How truly angry was he? she wondered. Would he have her killed? No. He could not kill her; she was too important to him. But, in spite of how he treated her, despite his façade of kindness and patience, Mr. Jackman had a hard, punishing, dark side. She’d witnessed his cruelness, occasionally directed at operatives and compound staff, and more often at the people she hid away. Sometimes, after she disappeared them, when they outgrew their usefulness, they vanished, even beyond her reach.
She shuddered and the shadows in the room rapidly shifted from comforting to menacing. She flicked on the light, its yellow rays chasing the evil out. This was not her, she thought as she stepped into the bathroom. She was neither maudlin nor paranoid. And as her left brain kicked in, she thought she should gain a better understanding of the effects of sleep deprivation.
She surveyed the bathroom as she slipped out of her clothes, letting them drop to the floor and kicking them out of the way. Eileen had returned at some point, leaving a bar of lavender soap and bottles of lavender shampoo and conditioner. And lavender bath salts – just in case she changed her mind about her hatred of baths, Nika supposed.
Being on the streets last night made her grubby and she was certain she was starting to stink even if everyone had been too kind to tell her so. The hot steady stream of water was an elixir for her tired body. She closed her eyes, as it cascaded over her, washing her uncertainties down the drain for a few brief moments. She let out a soft sigh, then reached for the soap, washing her body then shampooing her hair. After she was rinsed, before stepping out, she took another moment to savour the steamy water rolling over her, soothing her. Hot showers were such a luxury. And the way she felt right now, it was almost as good as Finn holding her hand. Almost.
After her shower, she dried herself with soft snow-white towels, holding them to her nose and inhaling their fragrant scent. The pretty soap, the sweet-smelling shampoo, the soft towels, Finn nearby – gave her comfort and security. It was a new feeling, a luxurious feeling… she hadn’t realized that women had special soaps with scents and soft towels that caressed their skin. When she returned to the compound, she would have to order some. In past, her showers had generally been perfunctory. Now she knew they could be more than that.
She looked down at herself as she dropped the towel onto the floor of the bathroom and walked into the bedroom. Her skin was glowing, and she felt pampered. Before her vacation had been cut short, she’d spent almost three days in Vancouver, shopping a little, eating a lot, but also going to a spa at Kelsie’s suggestion. The best spa in Vancouver, Kelsie told Nika, promising that she wouldn’t regret it, which was almost true. She got a manicure, a pedicure, a facial; she got waxed everywhere – eyebrows, legs, pits. The waxing wasn’t fun, she yelled in Russian when they gave her a bikini wax. At the time she couldn’t imagine any reason worth that kind of pain. But now, as she surveyed Finn’s bed, she understood a little better why women might go to those lengths.
She dragged Finn’s suitcase onto the bed, pretending she forgot Eileen’s horror when Finn did the same thing, grinning at the absurdity of that thought. As she sifted through the contents, inspecting her clothes and his, she realized that there was no nightwear in the bag. Finn had been too rushed in the store to remember to buy her pajamas and it also appeared that Finn forgot to bring some for himself. This was going to be a problem, she mused. She was accustomed to wearing pajamas to bed and without them, she would easily get cold in this stormy, inclement spring weather. The goosebumps on her arms agreed with her assessment. And she thought about Finn, feeling the heat in her face, thought about what could happen if she slipped between the covers naked. It wasn’t an unwelcome thought, but she didn’t think Finn would agree to it.
CHAPTER NINE
Finn talked with his parents for what seemed like an eternity, watching the clock on the fireplace mantle, and faking his interest in the hockey game. Conversation with his mom and dad was something he usually enjoyed, especially after Eileen had been fed and plied with red wine. But tonight, it was not nearly as engaging as the enticing Russian woman he had stashed away in his bedroom. He grinned as he thought back to his 16-year-old self who was totally worshipping him right now. Doug had returned from his walk in the rain a few minutes after Nika went to bed. He wished everyone an insincere goodnight and stalked up the stairs, dripping water on the carpet and earning a glare from his mother.
A half-hour seemed a reasonable amount of time to catch up with his parents without insulting them. Finn stood up warily, yawning and stretching, hoping that he was not wrong about his timing. “I’m going to check on Nika. Probably go to sleep. Late shift last night.” He leaned over and kissed Eileen on the cheek. “Thanks for dinner, mom. G’night both of you.”
“Of course, Finn,” Eileen responded as Don waved distractedly. “It’s so good to have you here and I just love Nika.”
Finn’s good humour faded as he turned his back to his parents. He was treating this like a farce. He shouldn’t have brought Nika here, and then lied to his parents about who she was to him. He was smarter than that, or maybe he wasn’t. Attractive women didn’t usually make him lose his good sense. And who the hell was she anyway? Now his mom believed that they were a couple and that this fucked-up relationship was long term.
He was still berating himself when he opened his bedroom door without knocking. Nika was standing at the end of the bed, hair wet and in disarray, wearing his white dress shirt, in process of rolling up the sleeves. A bolt of sheer, unbridled lust hit him, jolting his cock to attention. Fuck, she was sexy! He was mesmerized by her, helpless against her allure. Wearing his fucking shirt and looking at him guilelessly, not knowing how crazy it made him to see her like that. As much as he tried, he couldn’t stop himself from consuming her with his eyes. Her beautiful, strong legs, the promise of a small lithe body under the oversized shirt, taut nipples teasing the fabric, her hair, untidy, still damp, intoxicating. And her eyes, hazel and gold and… darkening with confusion.
He stepped into the room and closed the door behind him, masking his own confusion by scowling. “What the hell, Nika?”
She bit at her lower lip, and that simple act sent Finn into overdrive. His cock was getting harder, begging him to please, please, please take her. “I’m sorry I borrowed your shirt without asking, Finn,” she said softly, mistaking his lust for anger. “We forgot pajamas. Both of us. I thought your shirt might work for me.”
“Don’t be sorry.” Finn tried unsuccessfully to keep the huskiness out of his words. “It’s just, you look stunning.”
Nika looked down at herself and then back up into Finn’s eyes. “This is stunning?”
“You are stunning.” He breathed in deeply, trying to settle himself. Her chest was rising and falling with her breath and Finn wanted to reach out and cup her breasts in his hands. They would fit perfectly, and he imagined the silkiness of her skin, the stiffness of her nipples, the burn of his fingers as he stroked them, branding her as his.
“What are you going to wear, Finn?” Nika dropped her eyes to the suitcase in front of her. Her courage seemed to falter under the weight of his heavy gaze, and still the asshole in him wouldn’t look away. “Perhaps you could borrow some pajamas from your brother or your father,” she said softly.
Finn barked out a hoarse laugh. No, he could not borrow some pajamas from Doug or his father. Even if they had them, they would laugh him out of their rooms. What would he be needing pajamas for with a hot little number like Nika in his bed? It would be an instant giveaway. But he knew he couldn’t sleep with her… next to her, with or without pajamas. Even if he was wearing a body cast, he still wouldn’t be able to control his hunger for her.
“I don’t wear pajamas when I sleep, Nika. I wasn’t thinking I was going to have a roommate when I packed my bag.�
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Nika looked at him thoughtfully. “I have never slept with a man before… or a woman for that matter. How will we do this?”
“We won’t be doing this,” Finn said, regretting his fucking boy scout morals. “You’ll sleep under the covers and I’ll sleep on top of them, in my clothes.”
“Finn, you will get cold. You should not worry about me. I am not afraid to share a bed with you. I am… a big girl.”
Finn’s eyes swept her, a small smile playing at his lips. She might be a big girl, but she was a small beautiful woman who was stirring up devilish thoughts. There was no way he could get under the covers with Nika and not regret things in the morning. It wasn’t that he hadn’t had his share of one-night stands. But he already knew that’s not how he wanted things to be with Nika. She’d never been with a man before and right now, his lust was out of control. He would take her too hard and forget to be tender with her. He would hurt her.
But Finn voiced none of these thoughts. Instead, he said, “Go to sleep, Nika. We’re doing it my way.”
“But, Finn –” Nika started before Finn cut her off.
“My rules, Nika. You’re under my protection, you follow my rules.”
“It’s a stupid rule, Finn,” Nika grumbled, but flipped back the covers and crawled into the bed. Finn caught a flash of her pretty new panties as she slid under the covers. She was wearing the blue ones.
He walked into the bathroom and closed the door behind him, leaning against it. He willed himself to take deep breaths, willed his cock to stand down. Away from her, his head started to clear so he could think a little more rationally. This was the most ridiculous thing he’d ever done. What the hell was he thinking bringing her home to meet his parents? He should have driven to the nearest police station and dropped her off. They would have protected her and made sure she got home safely. But he knew what was going on – he knew it from the minute he saw her, ferocity and innocence all rolled into one. He wanted her, not just as a distraction, but to keep. He’d never experienced that before in his life, that thunderbolt. And he had to figure out how to make her want him back – not from her brainy, curious perspective, but from the same emotional, passionate perspective he was coming from.
He leaned his hands on the bathroom sink and stared at himself in the mirror. Tired, dark brown eyes stared back at him. He needed a shave, a haircut and a good night’s sleep. He very much doubted that he would get any of these tonight. He sighed and then startled a little as his phone rang from the bedroom. He hurried out of the bathroom to the bedside table where he’d dropped the cell earlier. Nika was laying her side, her big hazel eyes following his every move. He looked at the call display, but it was marked as private. He answered with a terse, “Yeah?”
“Finn, it’s Kelsie.” Her voice was breathless and whispery.
“Just a second.” He covered the mouthpiece and looked at Nika who stared solemnly back at him. “I’ll be right back,” he said as he left the room.
Finn walked down the stairs, pulled his shoes and jacket on and stepped outside onto the front porch. The rain was still pelting down, and it was fucking cold, but the porch was covered, and he had the privacy he needed. He sat down on a white wicker rocker as he said into the phone, “Kelsie, I didn’t think we were ever going to talk again.”
“I shouldn’t be calling you, Finn, but I’ve messed up bad. Everyone is pissed at me. And you will be too when you hear what I have to tell you.”
Finn sighed as he raked a hand through his hair. “This wouldn’t have to do with a young woman named Nika, would it?”
“Oh my God,” Kelsie breathed, tension easing from her voice. “Is she with you?”
“Yeah, I have her.”
“Finn, you’ve got to get out of your house if that’s where you’re at. You’re not safe there, everyone is after Nika.”
“And why does everyone think I have Nika?”
“Because, I told Dean about you and he told his boss. But the Russian’s are probably aware of you too.”
“Fuck Kelsie, why’d you tell Dean?” Finn’s anger at her surged through him. That’s why he could never find a connection with her. She just bloody well went ahead and did things, consequences be damned. But then who was he to judge as a twinge of pain in his thigh reminded him of his own folly.
“I told him because he was so angry at me for my role in Nika’s disappearance. I only told her about Vancouver. How the hell was I supposed to know she’d just wander off without protection?” Kelsie’s tone was a little higher, her voice a little louder. “And now I’m breaking another rule by calling you. But believe me, the Russian’s will stop at nothing to get their hands on Nika. You need to take her and hide her far away from wherever anyone can find her.”
Finn started to say something, but Kelsie cut him off. “I have to go.” Then the line went dead. Finn sat there for a few minutes, phone in hand, considering the situation. Kelsie sounded angry and scared. She liked to believe she had well-contained emotions, but she truly was a loose-cannon. He wasn’t completely surprised that she was in the middle of and had even unwittingly caused this situation, whatever this situation actually was. Because he hadn’t had a chance to talk to Nika, to get her story, not the bullshit I-can’t-tell-you story, but the complete unabridged version. A sudden fury reared up in him, at Kelsie, at Dean, at Nika, but mostly at himself.
He shouldn’t have brought her to his parents’ house, he thought with disgust. He was thinking with his cock, not his head. He needed to get her out of here, tonight. This couldn’t wait until tomorrow. The lights were out when he’d come downstairs, everyone was in bed. It would be easy enough to pack up Nika and leave. He frowned – but to where? He couldn’t be here, and he couldn’t go home. And he didn’t know who to trust. He couldn’t tell his parents the truth, not because he was a shit for lying to them, but now he was afraid for them. He just needed to leave. He rubbed his eyes with his hand, trying to brush the cobwebs away.
The front door opened quietly, and Finn looked up to see Doug step out onto the porch. “You and the little missus get into a fight?” he asked in a gruff voice. The anger was still simmering in the set of his jaw, the darkness of his eyes.
Finn sighed as he considered his brother. He and Doug were never going to be best friends, but there was no doubt in Finn’s mind that Doug was loyal to him. Of all the people he knew, Doug was the one he trusted more than anyone else. He took his role as big brother very seriously, which was what often caused the friction. Finn was under pressure, time was slipping away. He had to make some quick decisions. He shook his head at Doug. “Not a fight, it’s bigger than that. I’m in trouble and I might have dragged you and mom and dad into the mess as well.”
Doug leaned against the railing facing Finn and drew his arms across his chest. “What’s going on?”
“Nika’s on the run from the Russian mafia.” It sounded ridiculous as it came out of his mouth, but Doug didn’t look surprised or skeptical.
“I thought she was Russian.”
“It’s not like that, at least I don’t think.” Finn countered Doug’s train of thought. “I’m almost certain she’s not involved in mob activities, but I think she knows something that the Russian’s badly want to know too.”
Doug furrowed his forehead. “You think all this, Finn,” he said incredulously, “but you don’t know? I thought she was your girlfriend! Fuck, don’t you two ever talk?”
Finn stood up, so he was eye-level with Doug. He shoved his cold hands in his coat pockets. “They might figure out that Nika’s with me. And if that happens, they’ll do some background on me, who I am, who I know, where I might go to lay low. Like here. Nika and I have to leave, tonight. I don’t have time to explain it to mom and it’s not safe for you guys or Nika if we stay.”
Doug blew out an angry breath. “You’re such an asshole, Finn. If you knew this could happen, why’d you come in the first place?”
“I didn’t know they would connect N
ika to me,” Finn defended himself.
“Why wouldn’t they connect you to your little Russian girlfriend?”
Finn hesitated. He didn’t want to admit that he’d only know Nika for a few hours, not days or months. He didn’t want to tell Doug that there might be something to this love-at-first-sight bullshit. That his penis had been temporarily in charge. Instead he said, “I had to make some quick decisions and I didn’t want mom on my back while I sorted things out. If I didn’t show up today, she would have flipped out.”
Doug snorted. “It was still fucking stupid.”
“I can’t change what’s past, I can only manage the current risk.”
“You’re an idiot and we’re never going to have that fucking talk we need to have,” Doug said angrily. “Because you’re going to get yourself killed.”
“I don’t want to get myself killed. I sure as hell don’t want Nika killed. Why am I standing here arguing with you? I have to get Nika and we have to go.” He turned his back abruptly to Doug and re-entered the house, quietly slipping up the stairs. Nika was asleep when he entered the bedroom – her eyes closed, her breathing deep and even. She looked like an angel. He placed a knee on the bed and reached over, giving her shoulder a gentle shake. Her eyes popped open and she stared up at Finn, confused.
“What?” She sat up, mindless of where the covers fell, but Finn didn’t let himself be distracted by her.
“We have to go, Nika. Now. It’s not safe here.”
“Okay, I’ll get dressed.” No argument, no questions. Complete compliance. An enigma, Finn thought again – there was no other way to describe her. She flipped open the suitcase on the floor and pulled out the new pair of jeans and slid them on. She smiled up at Finn as he watched her, couldn’t take his eyes off her. “I’ll just wear your shirt if that’s okay. I like it.”
