With a look of pain, Tarien stopped for a moment, considering. “Jason, I have no way to repay you for the gift you have given me. You have shown me how to feel, to experience a small amount of emotion that struggles to find a way to grow. I now look at those around me with concern and understand what this concern means. I have always witnessed it objectively, but to feel it is entirely a new thing. This concept spread to the other Techs, which are as much a part of me as I am of them. We are one when we are bonded through the WorldNet. As you have shown obvious concern for me, your concern for me is being felt by the other Techs. We are grateful for this, and we regret we have no knowledge of how to return this affection.”
Jason didn’t know what to say, didn’t know what he meant. He sat there, quietly, trying not to look away, wanting to hold Tarien’s eyes as Tarien held his. But he looked down at the bed, absently straightening creases in the blankets. He was listening, but his mind was also on romance and he realized, given the gravity of the situation, how selfish he was being. Now was not the time to allow his attraction and desire to distract him.
Tarien continued. “We must stop Faust. But more, we must contain and control this new advancement. It is our belief you will be key to this plan.”
Jason looked up, chastising himself for being captured by those green eyes and the perfection of Tarien’s face. How did any man have lashes so thick and dark? Stop it. Focus on the issue. “I’m sorry, but I don’t think you have . . . calculated this plan out. I can’t do anything. The moment I leave here, or even if I don’t, I’m going to be captured. Despite my new nannies, I can’t prevent any of this. Even if I had my hands around Faust’s neck, even if I managed to throttle the little bastard to death, the technology is already out. The records have been saved in numerous locations, and any person on the medical team will be able to reconstruct the findings even if I somehow managed to destroy them all.”
He decided he didn’t care if Tarien was uncomfortable with his staring or not, he tried to memorize every aspect of his face, the pattern of those dark lashes over such pretty eyes. Since he would almost surely be captured and burned alive, burned because Faust would have to utterly destroy Jason lest he heal, Jason would at least make sure he had something to focus on while he was being killed. It’s silly, and stupidly romantic, but I’m going to etch his features into my mind so I can think of them while my body is destroyed by Faust. The bastard can’t take that away from me.
Tarien did not look away. “I believe we have adequately considered the possibilities and we have one possibility that might work. It will require a great deal of effort and, I’m sorry to say this, but you will be required to do several things abhorrent to you. There are complexities to this plan which, even if you succeed, may bring you harm.” He hesitated. “Jason, you would have to accept things that might ruin you, but for which there is no escape.”
“What does that mean?”
“We . . . I cannot reveal everything yet. I’m sorry. I ask you to trust me and . . .” He closed his eyes. “I ask also, when the time comes, that you forgive me.”
Something inside him turned cold. Jason didn’t know what he meant, but he knew Tarien manipulated him. Worse than manipulated. So, even my desire and wants are a tool. Tarien used Jason’s infatuation to his advantage, knowing Jason could not refuse. Jason wanted to scream at him, punch him, but he just sat there. “What can you tell me? Anything?”
Tarien nodded. “Much. Not enough.” He looked at Jason quietly for a few moments. “We know you are attracted to us.” Jason flinched, hearing his thoughts echoed in Tarien’s voice.
Jason clenched his teeth, a pang of anger echoing in his chest. Then he was simply afraid, filled with shame, a helpless resolve. “I’m sorry.” He looked at the floor.
Tarien leaned forward and touched Jason’s face. “You think I do not care, that I use you. You think I cannot feel as you feel, that my goals are only to harness your ability toward the goals we Techs have set forth. That is not true. If this were the case, perhaps it would be easier to accomplish what must be accomplished. The problem is the opposite. I care deeply and have no frame of reference for what I feel.”
Jason was captivated by the turn of the conversation, not expecting to hear the sentiment in the words being spoken. His fingers found the crease of one pant leg and he began to pluck at it as his heartbeat quickened.
Tarien clearly detected Jason’s surprise. His voice took on a richer tone, laced with concern and emotion that Jason had never heard. “Is it okay to touch your face? Is it permissible for me to ask you to touch mine? Jason, please understand. I have lived my entire life without human contact. I have witnessed it a million, million times through my interconnects, but I have no way of enacting my own desires. Will they seem contrived? Are they suitable to the situation? How will they be received? What will I do if I’m rejected?”
Jason gave a startled laughed. He blinked in stunned disbelief. Finally, he said, “You know what, Tech? You’re way overthinking things.” He grinned. “Really? This isn’t just a way of pushing me to do whatever you want?”
“Yes, I do feel much for you.” Tarien said, not taking his eyes off Jason, who let out an explosive breath.
“Wow. This is not at all what I expected.” If that’s true, then I’m not letting my one chance get away. Jason leaned forward, wrapped Tarien in his arms and kissed him.
At first, Tarien simply raised his arms mechanically, as if drawn by marionette strings, and placed them on Jason’s shoulders. Jason grazed Tarien’s lips lightly with his own, the softest of touches. Then he pressed his cheek against Tarien’s and simply held him intimately. “You start like this, robot. A gentle kiss. Then you stop suppressing things. That’s the nature of feeling. You have to let the feelings out, exhibit them, not stifle them or overthink them.” He drew back a bit but kept his arms around Tarien.
“I am not a robot.” Tarien took a deep breath. Then, clearly struggling, he leaned forward and kissed Jason in the same way. A light touching of lips. He sat back and stared into Jason’s eyes. “I had no idea. This feeling is incredible.”
He looks so vulnerable, thought Jason.
“Ever since I first observed you, I have wished to be close. I have never been sure why, or in what capacity, but I am . . . compelled to be near you. The other Techs find this fascinating, amusing, and I have been encouraged, urged to pursue more. They wish, as do I, to explore this. But we have feared the harm it would cause. Normally, we are not permitted to interact. You are a special case, requiring our explicit interaction. It is a contradiction. I was torn with frustration because I was required by necessity to involve you in the great plan to stop the dangers we see. At the same time, I found myself desiring you in ways I have never experienced. I warred within. Techs are viewed with such esteem, obeyed without question. I worried I would profess my desire and you would feel compelled to obey. The abuse of such a position was abhorrent to me. Still, my desire did not dissipate.”
Jason was touched by the play of emotion on Tarien’s normally stoic face, even if his words were stilted. “At least I got a kiss out of it.”
Tarien actually laughed in surprise. “If you would permit me, I would kiss you as much as is reasonable, given my responsibilities.”
Jason closed his eyes in pain. “You’re not the one abusing the situation here. You had enough will to stop yourself. Or maybe your edicts to not harm came into play. I don’t know. What I do know is that I didn’t exercise the same restraint, have the same compassion. After what happened in the laboratory apartment, I’m both embarrassed and horrified. You saw me. You know what happened. I raped her. Tarien, I should be put to death for what I’ve done. There is nothing I can ever do to atone for that. I know what it is like to abuse power, position.”
“We know you feel this way. We know, also, the necessity of this experience. There is a reason why this wisdom will serve you well in the future, if we win. Jason, I cannot excuse what you have done. Ther
e is something you can do. You can heal her completely. Anything she might ask of you, you can give. This will never make up for what was done, but she can be made into anything she desires as a gift to show your sorrow. She may forgive you. Keep this in mind as a reason to fight, to win. There is a deeper reason for you to know what it means to abuse power, Jason. This lesson is priceless.”
Again, there were these odd references to an envisioned future. “Tarien, please tell me how we are going to get out of this mess. Right now, I want nothing more than to hide in here with you forever. Pull the blankets over our heads and show you more than kisses, but I don’t have the kind of information you possess. I don’t know what is going to happen. How we are supposed to get out of this nightmare? I’m worried, and I believe this is the only time I’ll ever get to be near you.”
Tarien reached out and embraced him, kissing his ear. The gesture was clearly spontaneous, and it caught Jason by surprise. A shiver went down his body. “Maybe,” Tarien whispered. And then he pulled back again. “But maybe not. First, you must understand something. Your ability to spread your new nannites is imperative. We would ask if you have complete control of them?”
Jason nodded. “Yeah, I do. It’s a little scary, but I also modified my own mind and ability to process the feedback.”
“We suspected as much. However, please be keenly aware of the dangers. When you begin to spread them out, you will, increasingly, be subjected to vast amounts of data and thus be required to more rapidly issue orders and make decisions. This can become overwhelming quickly, even with the smallest amount of area under your control. Techs are raised and modified to handle this, but most of them succumb to the flood of data and are lost. We must know ourselves, the core of who we are, and use this knowledge as an anchor point. You will find it is easy to become lost. It can be wonderful, but your mind can be scattered throughout your uplinks and unable to find its way back.”
Jason thought about this for a moment, understanding what he said, but unsure of how to deal with it.
“So, what should I do? Limit the exposure? Cut off areas trying to demand my attention? I don’t have any training for this or any idea of what to do!”
“Yes, this is true. But you have several advantages. The first is these devices are all attuned to you. Incoming data for Techs is provided through imprecise external controls designed by others. You will be intimately familiar with these nannites. Another advantage is doing this in stages. They have been replicating in large quantities outside and will continue to do so, but are still within a limited area. You must spread them out, and quickly. The key to this is to utilize external processing and storage. You can set up autonomous systems. You don’t need to directly control everything. You can use passive control over these autonomous systems. This gives you control over how much you can handle at once, then you can increase control as you are able, rather than being immersed in too much without time to adjust.”
Jason shook his head. “I can’t give the nannies orders unless I leave the Faraday cage. And the moment I poke my head out there, there is a risk the security cameras in the area will give Faust my location.” He found himself agreeing with Monica about visual augmentation, which turned every person into a spy. “I need to get a lot closer to the areas where my nannies are spreading. The transmit and receive signals are far too weak to travel this far. Getting closer means a long-distance walk in monitored territory. Assuming someone with visual augmentation doesn’t see me.”
Tarien kissed him again, more solidly.
Why couldn’t they stay here? Jason hated that he finally had something he wanted badly and no time to enjoy what might come from it.
“I cannot seem to stop now that I am permitted to do this. It is so wonderful.” Tarien grinned like a little boy. Then he continued. “You will replicate some of your nannies near the edge of this room and create a physical conduit through them. The cage merely prevents signals from going in or out, but this barrier is based on attempts to transmit through the material in the walls. If you were to create a small opening filled with broadcasters and receivers, you would be able to sense things outside and issue orders. This will tie you into your external systems without having to leave. It will also allow you to start gathering information we can use. At the least, it will provide an early warning if we are to be discovered.”
Jason smiled at the familiarity of the kiss, but he couldn’t get over his rising panic. “Tarien? What’s the probability of success for your plan?”
For a moment, Jason thought he wouldn’t answer.
Finally, Tarien looked down at his hands. “We calculate the probability of escaping Faust at thirty-four percent. We calculate the probability of destroying Faust at eleven percent. We calculate survival beyond these two things at seven percent. And we calculate the probability I will be destroyed while getting you to where you are required at ninety-eight percent.”
“What! You can’t believe I’ll go out there knowing you’ll be killed? Tarien, if you have learned anything, you should know I’m ridiculously protective. I won’t willingly enter into a plan where you are going to be destroyed.”
“We calculate the probability I will become enslaved to Faust if you do not intervene in some way at 100%. This probability extends to all Techs. It is not just I who wishes for your help. It is all of us. Please, Jason. I do not wish to spend the rest of my days without you, as a puppet of a mad emperor. I would willingly die before I lost what little freedom I possess.”
Either way, leaving here is a death sentence to Tarien. “Why are the odds of you being killed so high?”
“I will help you understand what must be done and you will be clear on why I will be of almost no help to you, other than as a tool.”
Jason closed his eyes. “What else?”
“By the time we leave, if not shortly after, all of the information regarding our plans thus far will be in Faust’s hands. Having gained control of the Techs based on new emergency powers he is sure to have requested, Faust will know there is to be sabotage. He cannot stop it, as I am the only one with the specific knowledge. These plans have been left entirely to me, so the other Techs could not reveal them. We agreed I would be permitted complete autonomy. But Faust can prepare. He will surround himself with robots, with armaments. The military will be called in to protect him. He will know I have willingly helped you, and I will be subjected to a new set of edicts the moment I leave here. Subject to his will. I will be forced to apprehend you, and to personally deliver you to Faust. I will not be able to counter these commands unless you intervene.”
He looked at Jason intently. “You will need to replicate your nannies into my system. In this way, you will be able to seize control of me, as you did with those others. I cannot overwhelm you, as your nannies are now attuned only to you and are biological in nature. Under your control, I will be unable to act as my edicts require. I will not be able to reveal your position or your plans. I can be used to overcome many technological constraints I would not otherwise have the free will to challenge.”
“I can’t do that!” Jason blurted, horrified. Images of Jenn flashed across his vision. “It’s possession. I took away their will, their entire ability to choose anything for themselves. It’s like . . . like rape. I raped them, her. I can’t do what I did to those people to anyone ever again, especially not you.”
Seeing Jason’s distress, Tarien touched his face tenderly, then ran his fingers over his jaw, through his hair. “Jason, we trust you. This is the reason you obtained this knowledge, though learning this cost you much in the way of moral hurt. Knowing what you now know, we believe you would not keep us under control, force us to do things we would not choose for ourselves. I mean, for myself. There is another advantage of this, which you will need.” He cupped Jason’s head and leaned in to put his forehead against Jason’s. “You will also be able to analyze my own enhancements, my ability to issue orders and commands to the technology of the Sector. This is a learned ab
ility, and one that takes years to perfect, but it will give you some idea as to how it works. You will be able to use those connections to override the Sector technology. They cannot cut you off, since Techs are considered impervious to corruption or abuse and there are no safeguards in place to stop us. Our influence is too widespread. The other Techs will be forced to work against you, though they will try to resist in any way they are able. Using my uplinks, you can also bolster the effects of the saboteurs; create increasing disasters that allow the populace to get out of this Sector. Then we must get to Faust, destroy him if possible.”
“Why do they need to flee? Why the evacuation? You still haven’t answered me about this.”
Tarien took a deep breath. “I would prefer to wait and tell you when it is time. I worry you will be too overwhelmed with choices if handed them to you all at once. Please let me carry some of this burden for you until it is time for you to carry it all.” He kissed Jason again. “Please.”
Jason decided to let it go for now. “I think I understand some of it. I hate this, but I will try. For you. I hope your plans are incredibly meticulous, because I can’t see a way around the military defenses. I don’t think you can override military technology, which is a separate system. Unless I’m wrong?”
“You are correct. We cannot issue orders that would stop them. We will be required to go through them.”
He whistled. “Wow, this must be some plan.” He stood and raked his hands through his hair. “I’ll start the nannies replicating to get us a link outside.”
He got up from the bed and walked over to the wall and touched the floor, letting some of the new nannies drop and begin multiplying. Small holes formed where they harvested materials necessary to build more of themselves. Jason watched them for a few minutes while they went from invisibility to an obvious pocket of activity. Next, they began replicating into the wall. For a while, he marveled at the technology. Able to use a myriad of materials to accomplish their construction, they were not constrained by the lack of metals or bio-available tissue.
Sector Seven Page 28
