by Jenna Jacob
My stomach knotted and my heart raced. Landing back on the chaise with my head in my hands, the bathroom door opened slowly. Savannah poked her head around the corner, wearing a soft sympathetic smile. Sitting down next to me, she wrapped an arm around my shoulder.
“If you need to leave, there’s a back door that leads to the alley. I can show you if you’d like.”
I gaped at her and blinked in surprise. Of all the things I imagined her to say, that wasn’t even on the list.
“Is that what I should do? Leave?” My voice trembled in fear and indecision.
A slight frown formed on her pretty lips. “I can’t tell you what to do, Liz. It’s your life… your choices. I made my decision, and it was the best thing for me. But what I chose might not be what’s best for you. No one can decide what makes you happy, except you.”
“But they forced your boss to close his company…forced you to quit your job, for crying out loud.”
“No they didn’t,” Savannah gasped. “Oh my god, is that what you thought?”
“But you said—”
“No. No.” She shook her head. “I need to back up. Myron, my former boss, he was like a grandfather to me. The only family I have is my sister, but she was living in Phoenix at the time. Nick and Dylan called Myron to explain our unique relationship, and to ask for his blessing. What I found out later was that Myron had wanted to close the business and retire long before Masters ever talked to him. But once Myron knew I’d be taken care of, he followed his own dreams. Of course at the time, I’d felt like the rug had been ripped out from under me, but Dylan and Nick assured me that if I wanted to work, they’d help me find a job in Chicago.”
“Did they?”
“No. I decided I wanted to stay home and take care of them, like they take care of me. But if I need something more in my life, they’ll do everything in their power to give it to me. They’ll never stand in my way.” A wide grin spread over her pretty face. “I never thought I’d enjoyed being a domestic goddess, but I have to confess… I love it. We take care of each other. We make one another happy, it’s the most amazing love I’ve ever had in my life.”
“So they didn’t force you to…”
“Never. I wouldn’t be with them if they had,” Savannah stated adamantly. “Oh, Liz. Ian and James don’t want to take from you. They don’t want your independence, your friends, or your job.”
All the things I had feared they would.
“They want to give you everything you’ve ever dreamed of, including a part of yourself you might not know is inside you.”
“Oh, god. I feel like an idiot,” I moaned.
“Don’t. Submission is new to you, right?”
“Yes.”
“Don’t be surprised if you’re overwhelmed and scared a lot in the beginning. God knows I was. But talk to them. Communicate what you’re feeling, and what you’re thinking. There’s not a Dom out there who can read your mind, although mine act like they can from time to time.” She giggled. “Seriously, if this is something you want, let Ian and James teach you. They’ll help you understand all these weird and wonderful emotions that are flying through you. They’re both good men. Loving, kind, and considerate. Not to mention very well respected.”
Savannah’s frank assessment of their character impressed me.
“Look, I’m not trying to sway you one way or the other. But if they were a couple of players, I would have marched you straight to the alley and told you to run.”
“Thank you.” Because of Savannah, I could finally inhale a deep breath. “I appreciate you coming to talk. There are times I feel like I’m losing my grip on reality. I am so out of my element. But then I look at them and…” I let out a nervous laugh. “Once I manage to shove my fears down, I feel like floating in the clouds. God, I think I might be crazy.”
Savannah giggled. “You’re not crazy, Liz. You’re one-hundred percent normal. I’ve been where you’re at right now. Every submissive has. If it’s any consolation, you’re not on the clock. There’s no set amount of time you have to sort this all out by.”
“Thank god,” I groaned.
“Dipping your toes into the lifestyle can be scary. Ian and James will let you stay in the wading pool as long as you need to. Best of all, you can step out anytime you want. They can’t and won’t force you to sink or swim. I’ll let you in on a little secret.” Darting a clandestine glance at the door, she leaned in close. “The subs have all the power, we just let the Doms think they do. That’s what makes it so amazing.”
Savannah was a sweet and loving woman. A twinge of guilt pierced my heart for thinking her slutty when I’d met her at the hospital. I didn’t have to be a geneticist to realize that I’d inherited more than a few strands of Sally Johansson’s narrow-minded DNA. A shiver of revulsion zipped up my spine. Pushing all the negativity aside, I inhaled a deep breath.
There were so many questions I wanted to ask Savannah, I didn’t know where to start. As if sensing my dilemma, she sobered and gave a resolute nod.
“Spill it. What do you want to know?”
“God, am I that transparent?” I frowned.
“Nope. I’ve walked miles in your shoes is all.” She smiled.
“How does it work? I mean…not the sex part, I know how that works…well, not personally, yet.”
“Which, for the records, is beyond amazing.” She swooned with a cheeky grin.
“I can only imagine.” Fantasies filled my mind, but I quickly shook them away. “What about going out in public? Don’t people stare when you’re with two men?”
“Unfortunately, sometimes they do. I used to be ubër sensitive about what others thought of me with two men. My Masters have a hard time keeping their hands to themselves, so people stare or give us condescending looks. Some are even brazen enough to make rude remarks. But I quickly decided I wasn’t going to let anyone make me feel cheap or dirty.”
Savannah was a little spitfire. I found her personality uplifting. The conviction in her voice eradicated a lot of my worries.
“We come here, to Maurizio’s a lot, mostly because our friends are here. But once in a while Masters decide to take me other places. They like to push me out of my comfort zone, to flex their big bad Dom muscles, but you did not hear me say that,” Savannah laughed.
“I heard nothing,” I replied with a smirk.
“Of course it makes me hot as hell when they do, so I’m not complaining. I usually end up getting so turned on by their kisses and touches, I forget I’m surrounded by vanillas.” She raised her chin defiantly. “It took a little time, but now I honestly don’t care what people think. It’s our lives—our happiness. No one has the right to judge our relationship, my Masters, or me. I don’t live my life to make anyone happy except my Masters. If the rest of the world doesn’t like that… well, they can just kiss my ass.”
I threw back my head and laughed. “I like you, Savannah.”
“I like you too, Liz,” she beamed, then hugged me tight. “Let’s exchange numbers, that way if you need to talk or have questions you can give me a shout.”
“I’d like that, a lot.”
“We should probably head back before they come in here and haul us out.”
“But it’s the ladies’ room.”
“Like that would stop them?” I blanched and Savannah laughed. “Come on. I’ll tell you about the night our Doms found Leagh, Trevor and me drunk as skunks on this very chaise.”
CHAPTER TEN
As we entered the private dining room, both Savannah and I were laughing about three drunken subs and four very unamused Doms. Looking up, I saw the worried expressions lining both Ian’s and James’ faces, and I instantly sobered.
“All better now?” Ian asked. Eyeing me harshly, his Dominant appraisal raked my flesh.
“Yes. I am. Thank you, Sir,” I replied, demurely.
“Thank you, Savannah. It looks like you worked a bit of magic on our girl,” James acknowledged.
O
ur girl. Strange, the sound of that didn’t fill me with panic. Savannah had worked more than magic; she’d performed a miracle.
“You’re welcome, Sir.” Savannah beamed.
“She certainly has,” Ian added. Standing, he pointed to my empty chair. “Sit. Eat your salad. And don’t ever think of running away from us again when something is bothering you. Is that clear?”
My face flushed in embarrassment as Ian dressed me down in front of everyone in the room.
“Yes, Sir,” I shyly mumbled.
“You don’t need to be embarrassed around us, Liz,” Nick offered with a sympathetic smile.
“You’re on a path that’s unfamiliar to you, but we’re well acquainted with the uneven road and all the pitfalls in your path,” Dylan added with a wink.
“Stop trying to drive the bus, Liz,” James admonished. “Sit back and relax. Ask all the questions you can think of, but let us lead you where you need to go. All right?”
Did he have any idea how damn erotic his buttery command sounded? Of course he did, and he knew the exact effect it would have on me, as well.
“Yes, Sir.”
Ian held my chair as I sat and scooted toward the table. Piercing the lettuce with my fork, I dove into my salad, keeping my head down until the heat drained from my face.
“You’re doing fine, girl. Stop analyzing everything. Follow that inner voice that longs to submit and please,” Ian whispered. A wave of hunger blossomed everywhere except my belly.
I paid close attention to the trio across the table as we ate and talked, Dylan and Nick’s personalities were far more divergent than Ian’s and James’. I also noticed that Savannah didn’t favor one over the other. She rendered equal affection to her Masters with an unorthodox freedom that I envied. It was plain to see the three of them were very much in love, and their individual traits complemented each other, as a whole.
Through conversation, I discovered that Mellie was Savannah’s sister. I wondered what the older Miss Carson thought of Savannah’s love triangle. I wondered what Dayne would think of my decision to give this kind of alternative lifestyle a try. I bit back a smile. He would have given me a high five and asked why it had taken me so long to break out of my shell. Damn I missed him.
We spend a long time discussing Trevor, and in particular Drake’s longing for revenge. I didn’t say anything about overhearing his conversation on the phone, but from the comments James made, I knew he was the person Drake had talked to back at the hospital.
The conversation slowly ebbed from retribution to a hodge-podge of various topics. Taking a bite of the crispy cheese bread, I heard Nick mention Councilman Cromwell’s name. Tensing, my heart skipped a beat. James strummed his thumb over my shoulder, in silent reassurance. Still, the bread in my throat seemed to expand. Reaching for my tea, I washed the dough down and listened.
“Master Stephen…um, Joshua called earlier,” Nick said. “He told me that Cromwell had invited him to cut the ribbon at the site for a new arts center, slated to be built next spring.”
I wanted to ask Nick if he would mind asking Joshua to shove the scissors through Cromwell’s heart after he cut the ribbon, but refrained. I didn’t want them thinking I was buckets full of crazy all the time.
James gently squeezed my shoulder. I turned to see a sparkle of arousal in his eyes as he dropped his napkin onto his plate. I tried not to focus too keenly on what he and Ian had in store for me, but questions gnawed like termites in my head.
“Stop fretting. We’re not going to put you on an altar and sacrifice your BDSM virgin ass tonight,” James whispered in my ear.
I couldn’t help but laugh. James had a unique ability to ease my worries. At least until the bill was paid and we’d climbed back into his truck. He’d only driven a few short blocks before he pulled into a gravel parking lot.
“We’re already at Genesis?” I asked on a trembling voice.
“Yes. Mika knows you’re coming, so we’re going to bring you in through the back door,” Ian explained as he helped me down from the truck.
“There’ll be a crowd of members checking in through the front. We figured it would be a little less intimidating for you this way, sweetheart,” James added as he punched in a code before yanking open a wide, metal door.
“Thank you.” I was amazed I could speak, since my heart seemed to be lodged in my throat.
Standing at the portal, I couldn’t force my feet to move. They seemed frozen in place. Ian and James bound their arms around my waist, patiently waiting for me to take the first step. Sucking in a deep breath, I managed to step over the threshold, only to jump when the heavy door slammed shut behind me.
Standing at the end of a long corridor, dozens of closed doors lined the walls.
“These are the private rooms,” Ian explained. “Come on, the dungeon is right through here.”
Making out way toward a large open archway, we stepped into the dungeon. I expected to hear screams, see blood, and feel a heavy weight of authority in the air. Instead, I was met with laughter, and a sense of casual calmness in the air. People gathered, talking and laughing, while others mingled or stood in line at the long bar on my left.
A handful of Doms busily plucked toys from various bags and cases, meticulously laying out their tools of torture on freestanding tables situated near each piece of dungeon equipment. Their subs stood or knelt on the ground at their feet, patiently waiting for their Dominants’ commands. Ian and James steadied me with their strong arms as I took in the sights around me. As I suspected, some faces looked familiar, but there were twice as many new ones.
Sucking in a deep breath, I reminded myself that I wanted to break free; change my life and experience everything James and Ian offered. Yet, standing in the middle of a BDSM dungeon, I realized my comfort zone was a couple of light years away.
The telltale tingles of panic numbed my toes as it worked its way up my body, but before I let it send me to a distant planet, Mika stood before me wearing a welcoming smile.
“It’s a pleasure to see you here, Liz,” he stated, brushing a soft kiss over my cheek. Hovering close to my ear, he added, “You look like you’ve seen a ghost. Relax, girl. You’re perfectly safe here, I guarantee it.”
Mika’s promise helped tamp down my whacked-out anxiety, and as he pulled back I gave him a grateful smile.
“That a girl.” He winked, then turned his attention to James. “What do you two have planned for this beautiful sub tonight?”
“We’ll probably grab a drink, watch a few sessions, then head back to the privacy of my room. Then we’ll…” A wicked gleam danced over James’ dark eyes and I shivered. “Slowly start her on the path.”
“Wonderful.” Mika beamed. “Good luck, Liz, though you won’t need it. You’re in very capable hands.”
With a smile and a nod, Mika walked away. The hairs on the back of my neck began to prickle. Scanning the members, I spied Kerr sitting alone at a small round table near the front of the room. He watched me with a sharp, evaluating stare. I couldn’t help but tense beneath his lecherous gaze, Kerr stood and began walking toward us. The man dweebed me out on every level, and it took all the strength I had not to turn and run.
“James,” I whispered, unable to keep the fear from my voice.
“Son of a bitch,” Ian groused under his breath, then leveled an intimidating glare on Kerr.
“What do you need?” James asked the man in an icy, terse voice.
“Just wanted to say hi to the pretty lady.” He shrugged. James and Ian held me in a possessive tight grip. “And wanted to volunteer if you two boys might be looking for a third Dom to put this hot piece of ass through her paces.”
“No,” I blurted out, shaking my head adamantly.
A loathsome smile crawled across his mouth. “You need to learn your place, slut. I wasn’t talking to you,” Kerr scoffed.
Slut? The way Kerr said the word left an oily film on my skin.
I wanted to slap him for the i
nsult, but before I could even raise a hand James stepped in front of me and moved in on Kerr. He stood toe-to-toe with the slimy bastard as Ian pushed me behind him protectively. I peeked over his shoulder. My heart hammered in my chest fearing James and Kerr were about to start throwing punches.
“You need to learn some etiquette,” James growled. “You’re not welcome around me, or anyone I’m with. Do I make myself clear?”
“Jesus, who pissed in your Wheaties? Lighten up. I was only offering. You don’t have to be a prick about it,” Kerr replied. Holding up his hands in surrender, he backed away, but kept his gaze locked on me like a lion stalking a gazelle.
James and Ian surrounded me like a fortress, pressing their hard bodies against mine.
“He’s a fucking asshole, Liz. Don’t let him mess with your head. Understood?” Ian whispered as he brushed his fingers through my hair.
“I don’t like him, but I’m not afraid of him,” I assured him. “I’m not afraid of anyone here. Not with you two by my side.”
“I wish he would have taken a swing at me. Then Mika could kick his player ass to the curb,” James fumed, then exhaled a heavy sigh. “Would you like to sit and watch some of the scenes? I’ll grab us something to drink.”
“Yes.” I nodded. “I’d like that very much. Could I have a rum and Coke, please?”
Ian chuckled and James grinned. “Um, they don’t serve liquor here, little one.”
“They don’t? But the bar… I thought… Okay. I’ll have cranberry juice, please.”
“I’ll get them,” Ian offered. “Soda for you, James?”
“That’d be great. Thanks,” he replied. “We’ll find a table.”
Ian pressed a kiss to my lips. “I’ll be right back, little one.”
James selected a spot toward the middle of the dungeon, close to some of the crosses and benches, but far away from Kerr. As we sat down, James jerked a nod to Dylan, Nick, and Savannah as they appeared from behind a long, red velvet curtain. Dylan headed toward the bar while Nick and Savannah joined us at the table. Soon the six of us were once again laughing and sharing stories.
