Despite being from the same family as Gage, Quinn had never fit in. Mostly because their father had made his life a living hell.
As always, the thought made Gage uncomfortable. He’d never understood why he’d been the golden boy of the family and Quinn had been the unwelcome stranger. He also didn’t know why he was thinking so much about the past lately.
Maybe it was Kari returning and stirring it up. Maybe now was a good time to ask a question that should have been asked long ago.
“Why didn’t Daddy like Quinn?”
Edie stiffened slightly. “What are you saying, Gage? Your father loved you two boys equally. He was a good father.”
Gage stared at her, wondering why she was lying. Why avoid the obvious?
“The old farmer’s market opened last week. I’m going to head over there this weekend and see if I can get some berries. Maybe I’ll bake a pie for next time.”
The change of subject was both obvious and awkward. Gage hesitated a second before giving in and saying that he always enjoyed her pies.
But as they chatted about the summer heat and who was vacationing where, he couldn’t shake the feeling that there were secrets hiding just below the surface. Had they always been there and he had never noticed?
Twenty minutes later, he hugged his mother goodbye, then picked up the trash bag from the kitchen and carried it out as he did every time he left. He put it in the large container by the garage and waved before stepping into his truck.
His mother waved back, then returned to the house.
Gage watched the closed back door for a while before starting the truck and heading home. What had happened tonight? Was something different, or was he making something out of nothing?
He slowly drove the familiar streets of Possum Landing. The signal by the railroad tracks had already started its slow flashing for the night. Those downtown would stay on until midnight, but on the outskirts of town they went to flashing at eight.
Unease settled at the base of his spine, making him want to turn around and demand answers from his mother. The problem was, he wasn’t sure what the questions were supposed to be.
Maybe instead of answers, he needed a woman. It had been a long time and his need hadn’t gone away. There were, he supposed, several women he could call on. They would invite him inside for dessert…and breakfast. He paused at the stop sign. No doubt Daisy would do the happy dance if he turned his attention in her direction. Of course, she would want a whole lot more than breakfast. Daisy was a woman in search of a happy ending. Gage was sure it was possible—just not with him.
He drummed his fingers on the steering wheel, then swore and headed home. None of those welcoming beds appealed to him tonight. They hadn’t in a long time. He’d reached that place in his life where the idea of variety only made him tired. He wanted the familiar. He wanted to settle down, get married and have a half-dozen kids. So why couldn’t he make it happen? Why hadn’t he fallen in love and popped the question? Why hadn’t he—
He turned into his driveway, his headlights sweeping the front of the house next door. Someone sat on the top step, shielding her eyes from the flash of light. A familiar someone who made parts of him stand up at attention without even trying.
Been there, done that, he told himself as he killed the engine and stepped out into the quiet of the night. But that didn’t stop him from heading toward her, crossing his lawn and then hers.
Anticipation filled him. He wondered how she liked her eggs.
Chapter Four
Kari watched as Gage approached. He moved with the liquid grace of a man comfortable in his own skin. He was what people called “a man’s man,” which made the most female part of her flutter. How ironic. She’d spent nearly eight years surrounded by some of the most handsome, appealing male models New York had to offer—a good percentage of whom had not been gay—and she’d never once felt herself melt just by watching them move. What was it about Gage that got to her? Was she just a sucker for a man in uniform, or was it something specific about him?
“So, how was your date?” she asked to distract herself from the liquid heat easing through her belly. “You’re back early, so I’m going to guess the ever-delightful Daisy is playing hard to get.”
She thought about mentioning her surprise that Daisy would let Gage leave without visiting the promised land, but was afraid the comment would come out sounding catty.
He settled next to her on the front step and rested his forearms on his knees. “You always were a nosy thing back when you were in high school. I see that hasn’t changed.”
“Not for a second.” She grinned.
He glanced at her and gave her an answering smile that made her heart do a triple flip.
“I had dinner with my mother,” he said. “I do it every week.”
“Oh.”
She tried to think of a witty comeback but couldn’t. The admission didn’t surprise her. Gage had always been good to the women in his life…his mother, her grandmother. She remembered reading an article somewhere, something about paying attention to how a man treats his mother because it’s a good indication of how he’ll treat his wife. Not that she was planning on marrying Gage Reynolds. Still, it was nice to reconfirm that he was one of the good guys.
“How is your mom?” she asked.
“Good. She had a rough time after my dad died. They’d been together for so long, I’m not sure she thought she could make it without him. Eventually she got it together. Last year she started dating again. She met a guy named John. They’re engaged.”
Kari straightened. “Wow. That’s great.” Then she remembered how close Gage had been to his father. “Are you okay with it?”
He nodded. “Sure. John is one of the good guys.”
Takes one to know one, Kari thought. “When’s the wedding?”
“This fall. He’s a retired contractor. He has a lot of family up in Dallas. That’s where he is this week. One of his granddaughters is having a birthday, and he wanted to be there for the party.”
“They say people who have one successful marriage can have another.”
Gage stared up at the night. “I believe that’s true. My folks loved each other. There were plenty of fights and difficult times, but on the whole, they were in love. From what John has said about his late wife, they had a strong marriage, too. I figure the two of them are going to do just fine.”
“I’d like to see your mother again. I always liked her.”
“She’s working up at the hardware store. It’s a part-time job to get her out of the house. You should head on up and say hi.”
“I will.”
When Kari and Gage had been dating, Edie had welcomed her with open arms. Kari didn’t know if the woman had done that with all Gage’s girlfriends, but she liked to think she and Edie had been especially close. Of course, Edie wouldn’t have been thrilled about her dumping Gage via a note and running away.
“Is she still mad at me for what I did?”
He glanced at her, laughter lurking in his dark eyes. “She seems to have recovered.”
“Okay. Then, I’ll pop over and congratulate her on the upcoming nuptials. I think it’s great that she’s found someone. No one should be alone.”
As soon as the words fell from her mouth, she wanted to call them back. Obviously, both she and Gage were alone. She knew her circumstances—but what were his? He was the kind of man who had always attracted women, so the choice to be single must have been his. Why?
She was about to ask, when he beat her to the punch.
“So, why aren’t you married, Kari?”
Before she could answer, he shrugged. “Never mind. I forgot. You weren’t interested in home and hearth. You had things to do and places to be.”
She bristled. “That’s not true. Of course I want to get married and have kids. I’ve always wanted that.”
“Just not with me?”
He didn’t look at her as he spoke, and she didn’t know what he wa
s thinking.
“Just not on your timetable,” she told him. She sighed. “Eight years ago, you were right on track with your life. You had seen the world and were ready to settle down. I was a senior in high school with a lot of unrealized dreams. I was young and hopeful, and as much as I cared about you, I was terrified by your life plan. You seemed so much older—so sure of yourself. Everything you said was reasonable, yet it felt wrong for me at the time. I didn’t want to be like my mother and grandmother, marrying out of high school, having kids right away. I wanted my chance to see the world and live my dreams.”
“I thought I was one of your dreams.”
“You were. Just not right then. When I heard you were going to propose, I panicked, which is why I ran away. I thought…” She hesitated. “You were so clear on the way everything would be. I was afraid I’d get lost in that.”
He sat close enough for her to feel the heat of his body and inhale the scent of him. She was torn between wanting to lean against him and heading for the hills. Confessions in the night were frequently dangerous. What would be the outcome of this one?
Gage surprised her by saying “You’re right.”
She blinked at him. “I didn’t expect that.”
He shrugged. “I thought I knew everything back then. You were what I wanted in a wife, we were in love—why wouldn’t we get married and settle down? You talked about going to New York and being a model, but I didn’t think you were serious.” He glanced at her and shrugged again. “That was pretty arrogant of me. I’m sorry, Kari. I should have listened to you. Instead I focused on what I wanted and tried to steamroll my way to the finish line.”
His confession caught her off guard. “Thanks,” she murmured. “I wish we’d had this conversation eight years ago.”
“Me, too. Maybe we would have found a way to make it work.”
She nodded but didn’t say anything. Privately, she doubted that would have happened. Even after all this time, the truth still hurt her. Gage might have wanted to marry her, but he hadn’t loved her enough to come after her and ask her to return home with him. He hadn’t loved her enough to get in touch with her and say he would wait while she followed her dreams. She took off, and he seemed to simply get on with his life.
“So I went into the army when I wanted to see the world and you went off to New York,” he said lightly, as if trying to shift the tone of their conversation. “I’m guessing you had a better time.”
She tamped her sadness and laughed. “Oh, I don’t know. At least you got regular meals.”
“Was money that tight?”
“A little. At first. But I got some part-time jobs and eventually modeling work. The food thing is more about being the American ideal of a working model. I didn’t eat because I had to lose weight. I was young and determined, which meant I wasn’t sensible. It wasn’t a very healthy lifestyle.”
“Aside from the lack of food, is it what you thought it would be?”
“I don’t know. I think young women want to be models because it’s glamorous. Where else can an eighteen-year-old girl make that kind of money and travel all over the world? There are lots of invitations. Men want to date models. Being a model is an instant identity.”
She pulled her knees close to her chest and wrapped her arms around her legs. “But the reality can be difficult. Thousands of girls come to New York, and only a tiny percentage make it to super-model status. A few more are successful. I was a little below that—a working model who earned enough to pay the bills and put myself through college, with a bit of a nest egg left over. The truth is, I never fit in. I found some of the parties were scary places. I wasn’t allowed to eat, I never was one to drink. And men who only date models have expectations I wasn’t comfortable with.”
She smiled at him. “I guess you can take the girl out of Possum Landing, but you can’t take Possum Landing out of the girl.”
“I’m glad.”
As he studied her, she wondered what he was thinking. Had her experiences shocked him? Compared with most of her friends, she’d practically been a nun, but she wasn’t going to tell Gage that. It would sound too much like making excuses.
“You were talking about finding a teaching job near Dallas,” he said. “Will you miss New York?”
“Some things, but I’m ready for a change. I was born and bred in Texas. This is where I belong.”
He rubbed the cracked paint on the handrail. “What are your plans for the old house?”
Kari considered the question. “I’m still debating.” She suddenly remembered. “Oh, I went around and did an inventory of furniture…mostly the antiques.”
Gage looked interested but didn’t say anything.
She sighed. “I loved my grandmother, but she was a bit of a pack rat. Anyway, I have a list. There are some I want to keep for myself…mostly those with sentimental value. I checked and my parents don’t want anything. So I’m going to sell the others, except for the ones you’d like.”
He raised his eyebrows. “What do you mean?”
“I didn’t know if you were interested in antiques. If you are, I’d like you to have first pick at what she had.”
“Why?”
Wasn’t it obvious? “Come on, Gage, we both know how much you helped her. You were always willing to run over and fix whatever was broken. After I left, you kept her company and helped her out, even though you had to have been really angry with me.”
“I wouldn’t have let that affect my relationship with her.”
She noticed he didn’t deny the anger, which made her uncomfortable. Funny how after all this time Gage’s disapproval still had the power to make her cringe.
“That’s my point,” she said, staying on topic. “You could have been difficult and you weren’t. After she died, you contacted the real estate management company whenever there was a problem with the house. I owe you. I figured you’d be deeply insulted if I offered money, so this seemed like a good compromise.”
He stared at her. Despite the fact that the sun had gone down a while ago, the Texas summer night was still warm. As his intense gaze settled on her face, she had the feeling that the temperature had climbed a couple of degrees. Despite the fact that she was wearing shorts and a cotton sleeveless shirt, she felt confined…restricted…and far too dressed.
Kari couldn’t help smiling. Boy, he was good. If he could make her writhe just by looking at her, what would happen if he ever kissed her again?
Too late, she remembered she’d promised herself she wasn’t going to think of the kiss again. Not when she’d spent most of two days reliving it. She’d firmly put it out of her mind…almost.
“All right,” he said slowly. “I’ll consider taking one of the antiques as payment. If you haven’t kept it for yourself, I wouldn’t say no to the sideboard in the dining room.”
It took her a second to figure out what on earth he was talking about. As far as her mind was concerned, the previous conversation hadn’t even taken place. Then all her synapses clicked into place.
“No, I haven’t claimed that one. Consider it yours.”
“I’m much obliged.”
His eyes held hers for a couple more heartbeats, then he finally looked away. She felt as if she’d been released from a force field. If she hadn’t been sitting already, she would have collapsed.
She struggled to pick up the thread of their conversation. Oh, yeah. They’d been talking about her fixing up the house. “I’m going to paint the whole place,” she said. “Inside and out. I’m doing the inside myself and hiring someone to do the outside.”
Gage glanced up at the tall eaves and nodded. “Good idea. I’d hate to see you falling off a ladder.”
“Me, too.” She stretched out her legs in front of her. “There are a couple of windows that need replacing, and the whole kitchen is a 1950s disaster. I’ll strip the cabinets and refinish them. I’ve already ordered new appliances and carpeting. I think that’s about it.”
“Sounds lik
e you’ll be busy.”
“That’s the plan. I’m going to start slow with the painting. Just do one room at a time. Everything needs a primer coat—it’s been years between paint jobs.”
He seemed to consider the night sky, then he turned to her. “I have a couple of days off coming up. I could offer you some brawn for moving things around and reaching the high places.”
She shivered slightly at the thought of his “brawn.” “I’m five-ten—I can reach the high places on my own. But I will say yes to whatever help you’re willing to offer.”
“Then, I’ll be here.”
She found herself leaning toward him as he spoke, as if what he said had great significance and she wanted to be close enough to breathe in every word. She sighed. Whatever was wrong with her was more serious than she’d thought. After all this time, she couldn’t possibly still be crazy about Gage. Not when they’d both gone in such different directions.
He rose suddenly. “It’s getting late,” he said, moving off the stairs. “I should be getting back home.”
She waited—more breathless than she wanted to admit—until he gave her a slight nod and headed toward his place.
“’Night, Gage,” she called after him, as if his leaving was a good thing. As if she wasn’t thinking about what it would be like if he kissed her again. Not that he was going to, obviously. Apparently, that one kiss had been enough for him. It had been enough for her, too. More than enough. In fact, she was really glad that he didn’t plan to try anything. She would have to say no and it would get really embarrassing for both of them.
She hated that he hadn’t kissed her.
By the next afternoon, Kari still hadn’t figured out why. Why he hadn’t and why it bugged her. Didn’t Gage find her attractive? Hadn’t he enjoyed their previous kiss? She really hated that his not kissing her had kept her up in the night nearly as much as his kissing her had.
It was the past, she told herself as she stood in her grandmother’s bedroom and slowly opened dresser drawers. But after all this time, she was finding herself being sucked back into what had once been.
Good Husband Material Page 5
