by Tina Leonard
As if feeling his stare, Daisy looked up. Their gazes locked. Their connection was so undeniably strong his stomach tightened. She half smiled and on autopilot, he smiled in return before hastily focusing his attention on his son.
The day wound on with ten flavors of birthday cakes and an assortment of Christmas pies. Kolt and all other kids present were on obnoxious sugar highs.
“Nice party.”
Luke glanced up from his third piece of cake to find his efforts to avoid Daisy had failed. At least they were in the quiet kitchen. The last thing they needed was an audience. “Yeah, uh, Mom and Dad went all out. They’re excited about finally being grandparents.”
“If that was another subtle dig at me, again, I’m sorry. I get that my actions hurt an awful lot of people.”
Ignoring her, Luke finished off his cake.
“Are things ever going to get back to normal between us?” She’d softened her voice, in the process filling him with an asinine desire to turn back the clock. If lives were road maps, how many wrong turns had it taken to land them in their current position?
“What do you consider normal?” Luke didn’t mean to be cruel, but seriously, the woman had vanished for ten years, didn’t bother telling him he had a son and now expected everything between them to be hunky-dory? “We don’t even have a baseline for what normal would look like.”
“For starters,” Daisy said, “we could talk. Share a meal. Discuss our son’s future.”
“We could do all of that,” he agreed, “but what’s the point? It’s not leading anywhere. Do you honestly think we even have a shot at being friends?”
Her complexion paled. “I-if that’s the way you feel, I’ll leave. I assume you won’t mind giving Kolt a ride home?”
“Of course, I don’t mind.”
She gathered her purse and keys from the bench beside the back door. “Please, thank your parents for me. And tell Kolt I said goodbye and I love him.”
“Aw, Daisy…” Damn if she didn’t have him feeling bad.
“What?” She stood in the open door. Luke knew he should ask her to stay, but he didn’t have it in him. Being polite just wasn’t in the cards. But what was? Clearly, he couldn’t maintain this level of animosity. For Kolt’s sake, Luke would have to find middle ground. “Okay, then,” Daisy said when he couldn’t find words. “Maybe I’ll see you tonight?”
“Yeah…maybe.”
She cast him one last wounded look before leaving.
FROM THE PARTY, DAISY WENT to Reasor’s for Doritos and Reese’s Pieces and coffee ice cream. Nothing soothed an aching heart like a good movie accompanied by a junk-food buffet.
She was standing in the checkout line when a man said from behind her, “Hey, there, pretty lady. Long time no see.”
The graveled tone gave her chills. She didn’t want to turn to see Henry, but she also didn’t want him for one second thinking she was afraid.
“Like that dress on you,” he whispered as they moved ahead in line. “Makes a nice showing of those curves you used to love for me to touch.”
“Back off,” Daisy said, trying to keep her cool despite her runaway pulse, “or I’ll scream for security.”
“You won’t do that, because if you did, everyone in the store would know what a dirty little girl you are.”
Bile rose, stinging her throat. She wanted to scream, but her vocal cords had frozen. Panic seized her, flooding her limbs with concrete. Run! her every instinct screamed, but her body refused to comply.
“Ma’am? Excuse me, ma’am? Are you ready?”
The checkout clerk’s prodding jolted Daisy from her horrifying past to the present.
“S-security,” she managed. “Is there a store officer?”
The middle-aged woman cocked her head toward a uniformed guard standing alongside the ATM machine. “Yes, but what do you need him for?”
Daisy turned to point at Henry, report what he’d done, only he wasn’t there. Had she imagined the whole thing? Hand to her temple, she tried to stop the store from spinning.
“Ma’am? You all right?”
“Y-yes. Fine.” Daisy paid for her few groceries, then returned to the ranch. The entire drive, she kept one eye on the road and the other on the rearview mirror. Only when she’d locked herself safely inside the house did her pulse slow.
“Heavens, girl,” her mother said from the sofa where she was curled up with a book. “You’re as pale as a jar of marshmallow creme. Are you coming down with something?”
“Maybe,” Daisy said, setting her groceries and purse on the floor.
“Where’s Kolt?”
“He’s still at the party. I’ve got a headache and didn’t want to spoil his fun. Luke’s bringing him by later.”
Nodding, her mother asked, “How are things going with Luke?”
“Could be better. If you don’t mind, I think I’ll lie down.” She’d almost reached the stairs when she couldn’t hold back tears a second longer.
“Sweetheart, what’s wrong?” Rising from the couch, Georgina pulled her into a hug.
Daisy wanted to keep all of the day’s troubles to herself, but she’d tried that tactic before with less than stellar results. First, Daisy shared what had happened at her son’s party. “I felt like a pariah. Like Luke’s whole family hates me. I don’t blame them, but what am I supposed to do? How can I ever make up for what I’ve done?”
“Give it time,” her mother counseled, helping Daisy sit on the nearest step. “Right now, Luke’s family is no doubt just as shocked as we were to learn Kolt’s been around all this time. What they don’t have is the love we all feel for you. Love makes forgiving come a little more easily.”
Groaning, Daisy covered her face with her hands. “Unfortunately, Kolt’s party was the high point of my day. I stopped by the grocery store and who should step up behind me in line? Henry.”
Her mother lurched back. “He didn’t threaten you, did he?”
Daisy shook her head. “Just said awful things.”
“Like what?” With her mother’s arms securely around her, Daisy told the worst, and felt surprisingly better for sharing her pain. When Daisy finished, Georgina said, “You should tell your brothers and Luke about this.”
“Please, no. It’s too humiliating.”
“Honey,” Georgina tucked Daisy’s hair behind her ears, “you have to get it through your thick head that Henry’s the one who has a problem—not you.”
“I know. In counseling, I’ve been over that fact a hundred times. But seeing him—having him that close—” She shuddered.
“Please at least talk to Luke about all of this.”
“Why? What good would that possibly do? Especially when he can’t stand the sight of me.”
“Sure about that?” Drawing Daisy in for another hug, Georgina said, “When you get to be as old as I am, you tend to want to get past the BS and straight to the heart of things. Want my opinion? I think Luke’s problem is that he never stopped caring for you. You devastated him once when you left all those years ago. Now you’ve hurt him again. He wants to trust you, but you’ve proven yourself—in his eyes, anyway—not worthy. The trick is going to be proving to Luke that not only have you learned from your mistakes, but that you’re willing to work through them to regain the special bond the two of you once shared.”
For Daisy, knowing her mother was right didn’t make the task ahead any easier.
“I’m not by any means suggesting you try getting romantically involved, but for Kolt’s sake, you should at least be civil.”
Daisy sighed. “You’re preaching to the choir, Mom.”
Georgina cracked a smile. “I don’t need the whole choir to hear me—just you.”
“YOU TWO HAVE FUN?”
As Luke rounded the backside of his Jeep, he saw Daisy rise from one of the front-porch rockers. In the waning light, the sound of cicadas rising and falling in the still air, the sweet scent of freshly-watered petunias lacing the yard, he could almost
forget what she’d done.
“Mom!” Loaded down with a pile of presents tall enough to nearly block his sight, Kolt shuffled across the parking area. “Grandma Peggy and Grandpa Joe gave me the best party ever! I got so many toys and games I could open my own store!”
“That’s awesome, sweetie.” She left the porch to help their son with his load. “Let’s put all of your new things on the dining-room table for now, then get you ready for bed. We’ll sort through everything in the morning.”
“But I wanna play with it tonight.”
“Kolt,” Luke said, coming up behind his boy with an equally impressive load, “how about grabbing more stuff from the car?”
“Okay.” Kolt scampered back the way he’d just come.
“I’d like a minute alone with you,” Luke said to Daisy once their son was out of earshot.
“Good. I’d like to talk to you, too.”
“You first,” Luke said, motioning for her to start.
“No, you.” Daisy fingered the long braid hanging over her right shoulder.
“Luke,” Kolt called from the Jeep. “I’m gonna need your help with my bike.”
“Sure.” Luke looked to Daisy. “Be right back.”
She nodded.
By the time the bike was set free, along with the ten-year-old riding hell-bent for leather down the drive, Luke no longer knew what to say.
“Does it bother you that Kolt calls you by your first name?” Daisy stepped up behind him.
“I’d be lying if I said it didn’t, but given the circumstances, I think it’s for the best. When—if—the time comes that he feels comfortable enough to call me Dad is something for him to decide.”
“Even when we were kids,” Daisy said, “I remember you doling out wisdom. The perpetual mediator.”
“This bothers you?” The sun had set and lightning bugs sparked over the tall grasses on either side of the mile-long drive.
“I used to envy that quality. The way our friends came to you for advice.” Over and over she stroked her braid, as if petting it for comfort. Was she nervous? About their situation? Or him in general?
“Funny how despite all of those times I helped everyone else, now I’m the one needing guidance.”
“Look how fast I can go!” Kolt whizzed by on the bike Luke’s parents had bought.
“Dang, bud, you’re flying!”
“Slow down,” Daisy urged. “It’s too dark to go so fast without a helmet.”
“Is that a maternal thing?” Luke asked Daisy. “Seems like my mom used to do the same. Just when I was having the best time, she’d shoot me down.”
“It’s not my intention to be a happy-smasher,” Daisy said, “only to keep Kolt safe long enough to grow into adulthood.”
“Why’d you leave the party?” The question had been on Luke’s mind all afternoon.
“Exactly why you’d think. Your family understandably hates me. I felt about as welcome as roaches at a picnic.”
Scratching his head, Luke asked, “Isn’t the saying ‘ants at a picnic’?”
“You know what I mean.”
“Yeah,” he admitted. “I do.” Was it wrong to want to mess with her? “I wanted you to stick it out, though. I wanted my folks to see you’re not intimidated by a few glowering old biddy aunts.”
“What if I am?” Head bowed, she said, “I ran into Henry today. All he had to do was say a few words and I froze—literally, froze.”
“Watch me do a stunt!” The gas lamplights that came on automatically when it grew dark enough illuminated the drive just enough to make Kolt visible when he jumped a twig. “Cool, huh?”
“Pretty awesome,” Luke called out.
Kolt jumped the twig again before racing off down the drive.
“With the ‘ears’ safely out of hearing distance, want to tell me more about your run-in with Henry?”
“Not really.” Tilting her head back, Daisy gazed up at the stars. “It’s a nice night, but I suppose I should get in the house and put Kolt to bed.”
“After that?” Luke asked.
“Want to hang by the pool? Maybe share a glass of wine?”
Yes. Luke would’ve liked nothing better. But the fact remained that he and Daisy were no good for each other. Time and Daisy’s actions had proven it.
“Sorry,” he said, “but I need to get home. Horses should’ve been fed over two hours ago.”
“Sure.” Arms folded, lips pressed tight, she nodded. “I understand.”
But did she? Despite their most recent kiss that’d rocked him to his core, she had to know he was right in staying away.
“Great. Then, ah, tell Kolt good night for me. We have a date for church in the morning, so I’ll pick him up around nine.”
“I’ll have him ready.”
“Please do.”
Was this how the rest of their lives were going to be? Short, to-the-point answers to each other’s needs in regard to their son? Luke hated it, but he knew that for his sanity, steering clear of Daisy was his most sensible path. “All right, then. See you in the morning.”
Walking away from her when she looked so alone and forlorn was no easy feat. But Luke managed, and he knew he’d be all the better for it.
Chapter Nine
“Hurry, pumpkin.” Daisy sifted through Kolt’s sock drawer to find a pair of navy ones to go with his khaki pants and cobalt shirt and tie. “We don’t want to be late.”
“I don’t want to go.” Kolt sat on the foot of his bed. He had bare feet, his shirt was buttoned crooked and his cowlick had never been more pronounced. Adorable, but not exactly the perfect image she was sure Luke’s mom wanted to present. “I’ve never been to church.”
Would the piles of guilt ever lessen? “It’s actually nice. Lots of pretty singing, and probably you’ll get introduced to lots of your grandparents’ friends who want to give you hugs.”
“I don’t want strangers hugging me.”
Sighing, Daisy stood. “Put on your socks and shoes. I need to grab earrings.”
“Why are you going?”
“Because I want to.”
Fifteen minutes later, Daisy opened the front door to Luke. She wore white slacks and a pink blouse, and she’d curled her hair and taken extra care with her makeup. “Good morning. Hope you don’t mind, but I’d like to tag along.”
“Um, sure.” Luke cleared his throat. “You look great.”
“Thanks. Kolt’s almost ready. Just finishing a bowl of cereal.”
“What kind does he eat?” He reddened. “Stupid question, huh? I find myself wanting to know everything about the little guy. He’s fascinating. Like I want to count his fingers and toes, but I guess the bus left the station on that one.”
“I am sorry,” Daisy said, remembering all too clearly the moment she’d first held Kolt in her arms. Aside from the wonder of it, she’d felt very alone. “If it’s any consolation, at his birth, I wished you were there.”
Luke’s expression hardened. “No. That’s no consolation at all. Am I even listed as his father on his birth certifi—”
“Okay, Mom! I’m done!” Kolt raced into the living room from the kitchen. “Hey, Luke.”
“Hey, yourself. You’re looking good this morning. All the old ladies at church are going to want to kiss you.”
Kolt made a face. “That’s what Mom said. Do I have to go?” On his way out the door, Kolt kicked it. “We never went in San Francisco.”
“It’s good to try new things. Plus, they have donuts and strong black coffee. Puts hair on your chest.”
Kolt made another face.
“Not even food bribes make you want to go?”
Fastening his seat belt, Kolt shook his head.
“I suppose if it’s all right with your mom, we could skip church and catch up on chores around the house. Get down and dirty. Muck a few stalls.” Luke put the car in gear and aimed it down the drive. “I’ve got a couple feed buckets with grain in them that need cleaning. They got wet during
that rain we had the other night and I haven’t had time to scrub ’em. The feed most likely soured. Might have a few maggots in it.”
“I love maggots!” Kolt declared. “They sound way more fun than stupid church.”
“What do you think, Mom?” The way Luke referred to her made Daisy inordinately happy. Truthfully, she’d enjoy nothing more than a lazy Sunday morning spent watching her guys work. “Sounds like a great idea. You get out of being kissed and hugged and Luke gets chores done. It’s a win-win.”
Especially for her!
“Only what would you think, bud, if we leave your mom here. I don’t think she’ll be much good to us if we’re doing man work.”
“Yeah,” Kolt said as Luke backed up the Jeep. “Mom doesn’t do good dirty work.”
“If it’s all right with you,” Luke said to Daisy, “after we finish up, I’ll probably take Kolt over to my folks’ for Sunday lunch.”
“Um, sure,” Daisy said past the lump in her throat. Was Luke really so opposed to spending time with her even in a casual, family-oriented way? Opening her door when Luke pulled up to the porch stairs, she gave the guys as cheerful a wave as she could muster, considering she’d just been voted out of their club. “Have fun.”
“We will!” Kolt was already diving for the front seat as Luke drove away.
For the longest time Daisy stood there, watching them go, trying to convince herself she wasn’t feeling stuck in a pit of gloomy despair.
So what if her boys didn’t want to be with her? She was already dressed for church, so she’d tag along with her mother. Then they’d have a gloriously civilized lady’s lunch. And then, nice and full from far too many carbs, Daisy would fling herself across her bed and cry herself to sleep.
“LOOKS GOOD,” KOLT’S DAD SAID, nodding at the lawn the boy had just mowed, “but you’ve got some clumpy parts that need to be raked.”
“I’ve never raked in my life,” Kolt whined. “And it’s hot.”
“Yup.” While Kolt worked on the lawn, his dad got to have all the fun with the hose and maggots. “The rake’s hanging on the barn tool rack. Grab it when you put the mower back where it goes. That wheelbarrow alongside the front porch would be a good place for you to put the grass clippings. Then you can dump it all in the compost bin.”
