by Body, Heart
“Is this your Titanic moment?”
She smiled at the sound of his voice. She’d made him watch Titanic twice, because she hadn’t thought he’d really gotten it the first time.
“I suppose it is.”
He moved in behind her and wrapped his arms around her waist. Realizing he was bare-chested, she felt a shiver slide down her spine.
“You want me to be that Leo guy?”
She dropped her head back on his shoulder, laughing so happy tears formed in her eyes. She glanced up at him, the deep garnet shell necklace she’d gotten him hanging around his neck. He hadn’t taken it off since she bought it for him. That touched her deeply, and she wondered if he knew.
“I don’t want you to be anybody but you.”
He tugged her chin until their lips met and Kira felt that now oh-so-familiar tingling start. When he slipped his hand inside her bathing-suit top, she slapped it away, glancing about the deck to see if anyone had noticed. Dev’s laughter caught her off guard, and when she shot him a questioning look, he kissed her hard on the mouth. In a low growl, he asked, “After all the things I’ve done to your body in the last month, how can you still manage to blush?”
That only caused her to blush more, and she ended up shoving Dev away and moving to sit at a nearby table, hoping she could somehow find the words she needed.
* * * *
Dev watched Kira’s body move to the table, wearing a bright orange bikini and a white sarong. She looked sexy as hell, but her shoulders held tension and her eyes were worried.
He couldn’t believe how well he’d come to know every little nuance of her in the short time they’d been together. He knew her almost as well as he knew himself.
Sometimes he felt he knew her better.
He’d discovered she was a fervent lover, always wanting to please him and always succeeding in not only pleasing him, but surprising him, as well. He’d discovered at her hands what it truly meant to make love to a woman.
He was also learning that maybe he wasn’t too old to change. That maybe he was capable of more than a purely selfish existence. That despite what he’d told himself most of his life, maybe he wasn’t a complete waste of DNA.
He sat beside her and brushed his hand over her hair, and even though he knew she needed to talk with him, he couldn’t resist pulling her forward for a heated kiss.
When he pulled back, she grabbed his hands like a lifeline and stared at them sitting on the table.
“Dev.”
She took a long, slow breath, something he’d come to learn meant she was about to be brave. Her beautiful eyes shone brightly when she lifted her gaze from their hands to his face.
“What happens next?”
Next?
He had no idea. He hadn’t thought past the end of the day when they’d dock in a little seaside village he’d heard had a street fair going on with many local artisans that he thought she’d like.
“Does there have to be a next just yet?”
He asked as gently as he could. He understood she was young, would obviously need more to life than him, but he’d hoped he could make her happy for a little while longer.
“Dev, I have to get back. I’ve loved every minute out here with you and I wish I didn’t have to, but I have to register for classes, then I’m finally starting my senior year and up to my eyeballs in tests, term papers, and study groups for eight months.”
Dev felt a heavy weight settle in his heart. How could he fight her education? He turned his face into the breeze hoping when he looked back at her, the emotions trying to strangle him wouldn’t be apparent.
“Do you have to go back now? We could travel, Kira. Go anywhere you like for as long as you like. You told me yourself that you’ve learned more about art on this trip than you ever would in a classroom.”
The selfish bastard was coming out again, but he couldn’t lose her, not yet. She was his world and he loved her more than he ever knew possible.
She squeezed his hands and sighed.
“That sounds wonderful, Dev, but I’ve got momentum going. I struggled so hard in school. The first three years, I switched majors five times. I was in constant educational counseling, after I flunked out of half my classes.”
She let out a breath and looked away but not before Dev had caught the pain from memories in her eyes and moisture forming.
“My whole life, everyone’s considered me a screw-up. I’ve heard so many blonde jokes that I’ve seriously considered dying my hair burgundy. My mom’s constantly telling me to just give up and find some nice young man to take care of me, and my sister laughs every time I tell her any of my dreams. As if there was no way possible I could ever achieve any goal I set my mind to.
“Don’t you see? I have to finish.”
Dev felt such anger boiling up inside him. He released her hands just so he wouldn’t accidentally hurt her. How could anyone dare to treat her like that? His heart hurt, did these people live in a hole or something? To think Kira a screw up. It was monstrous and he craved to right the wrongs dealt her. He ground his teeth to keep from saying too much. He’d learned to leash his temper when injustice was directed at himself, but he’d never been able to keep himself under control when someone he loved was maligned.
“To prove something to a bunch of libelous whoremongers who wouldn’t be able to find their asses with both hands and a flashlight?”
She laughed. He swore that the blood supply to his brain had been cut off and someone had injected him with an extra batch of testosterone.
Her smile didn’t last long, though, and she got up and wandered to the side rail. The salt sea breeze whipped through her hair now, leaving it tangled and damp from its mist. Her sarong clung to her legs like skin and he could see every contour of her body through it.
He waited in his chair, knowing with the way he felt and his lack of ability to smash someone’s face in, there would only be one other option, and he got the distinct impression she didn’t want to fuck at the moment.
“Not just for them, Dev.” She turned and gave him a serious scowl. “And watch it. You are talking about my family, you know.”
When the scowl turned into a sweet smile, he went to stand by her. He wrapped his arms around her waist, she splayed her fingers on his bare chest.
“I need to prove it to me. I need to know that everything they’ve said isn’t true.”
“Mon dieu, Kira. How could you even think it for a second?”
She shrugged, her fingers tracing the mass of vines tattooed around his bicep.
“When it’s all you’ve heard all your life, it sort of becomes a given. But somewhere deep inside me, I don’t believe it. Once I discovered sculpting—then sketching and painting—I knew I had talent. For the first time, I got excited about something. I have to finish it, Dev.”
He pulled her closer, pressed her head against his shoulder, knowing he’d lost.
“Of course you do.”
They stood for a long time, salt air and sea mist spritzing them, the sun sinking into the sea. Dev kissed her head and held her close, listening to her breathing mix with the hum of the engines and the slapping of the waves, wondering if he’d ever survive her leaving him, but knowing he had to let her go.
He loved her too much to shackle her to himself. Kira had a whole life ahead of her, and he’d be no better than his father if he took that from her just so he wouldn’t be alone anymore.
Tenderly, he kissed her until he was hard with need and swept her from the deck into his arms, laying her on the large cushioned lounge. The sun was setting, the evening’s first stars had appeared in the deep blue sky and whatever Sarah was cooking tonight in the galley smelled heavenly, but all Dev only cared about Kira.
“Dev, someone will see us.”
He laughed as he came down beside her.
“They didn’t the last time.”
She blushed as he knew she would, remembering the other morning when, after a swim in the ocean, they�
�d made love on the deck in the hot afternoon sun. Of course at the time, he’d known where everyone else was and that it was relatively safe. He couldn’t exactly say the same thing now, but knew his crew were discreet among other things and he’d trust each one of them with his life, and Kira’s reputation. To be on the safe side, he’d also make sure if anyone came upon them, all they’d see would be his ass.
He covered her with his body and kissed her long, slow, and deep, quickly removing her bathing top and suckling at her magnificent breast. Kira’s moan set him on fire; the look on her face as she surrendered to her fate was that of a nymph, plain and simple. Such a contradiction, his Kira—so sweet and innocent with her shy blushes and her pure heart—but he knew how to set her body flaming and turn his sweet innocent Kira into a seductress to rival Mae West, Jean Harlow, and Marilyn Monroe combined.
Her nails grazed the skin on his back. He wished he could give this girl the world. She met his hungry kisses with a passion that rivaled his. He sucked her lower lip into his mouth, his fingers sliding over her slick pussy. This sent his cock into overdrive, so that he had to release it from the cotton trousers.
“Touch me, Kira.”
Kira didn’t need more encouragement than that. She eagerly grabbed his cock with both hands and started an erotic massage, but when she tried to pull away, to put her lips on him, he held her tight.
“Not this time, Kira. I want to love you.”
He pressed her back into the soft cushion, her gaze fixed on the stars over her head as he unwrapped her sarong and slid off her bikini bottoms.
“Dev,” she whispered, as he kissed her throat and his fingers slipped inside her. Would she ever be able to go on without this? Without Dev?
* * * *
“You are not a screwup, Kira.” His tongue laved her nipples until they were so hard they hurt. “You are the most incredible…” His fingers continued their assault on her pussy, her hips beginning to undulate, meeting him on each thrust. “Fascinating…” He began to slide down her body, his tongue dipping into her navel. “Beautiful…” Kira had no idea the navel was an erogenous zone. She wondered if there was anything Dev didn’t know. “Seductive…” His hands slid down her thigh as his tongue made its first graze over her heated slick folds. “Artist, I’ve ever had the pleasure to meet.”
It was at the word artist that the tears formed. Sure, she was an art major, and sure she loved to be creative, but to be deemed an actual artists seemed arrogant and out of her grasp. To have someone acknowledge her like that, felt heady and surreal, and really, really good.
“And for the record,” his eyes pierced her, as his head was poised over her pussy, poised for a sexual assault she was already dying from, “I like you blond.”
She didn’t have long to dwell on his compliments before she felt his tongue pushing on her clit, his finger sliding in and out of her and another powerful orgasm right around the corner.
Dev started speaking in French, something she noticed he did when he got really aroused, words like ‘Je suis amoureux de toi.’ or ‘Ton corps si sucré’. She never knew what he meant, but it sure the hell was hot.
Dev’s musky, spicy scent filled her as she ran her fingers through his hair and began those stupid panting sounds that embarrassed her so, but she couldn’t seem to stop. Her eyes closed, her head pushed so hard into the cushion she could feel the vinyl straps through it.
A second later and she’d found that perfect wave and rode it into the shore as Dev’s hard cock moved into her, loving her with aching tenderness like she’d never experienced.
His hips rocked over her thrusting in and out. The sound of skin slapping skin mixed with heavy breaths and pleasure filled moans rivaled that of the ship and the sea.
When Dev sat back, slipping her thighs over his and thrusting into her harder with every second, Kira watched as his gaze traveled to where their bodies connected. She watched him as he watched their bodies slap together and pull apart. In time, she got the courage to look with him. Watching his thick, wet, and engorged cock slide in and out of her wet pussy heightened everything she was already feeling.
“Touch your clit, Kira.” Their hips rocked. Asses colliding. “Make yourself come.”
Never in a million years could she have imagined doing such a thing, but when Dev suggested it, it seemed perfectly natural.
She manipulated the little button until she felt herself tightening, but the pull Dev’s cock had on her was too strong, as it slid in and out, getting wetter with every pass. She couldn’t help herself, she reached out to touch it. Slid her finger over it as Dev shivered, then sucked her finger with their mixed juices on it into her mouth.
With a growl, Dev was back on top of her. His hands wandered and explored as if he was trying to set every inch of her into memory. His tongue and mouth licked, bit and nuzzled at her affectionately. All the while, he spoke soft words of love in a language she didn’t understand, but touched her so deeply it brought tears to her eyes as he rode his own orgasm to its culmination.
Dev lay atop her, pumped forearms taking the weight, his body covered and protected her while he nuzzled her face with his. If she lived to be a hundred, she knew she’d never experience something like that again and even as she reveled decadently in it, she knew why.
Dev was saying good-bye.
Chapter 15
Dev held his gaze steady on the warm brown liquid in his glass, sound vibrations making the surface ripple. The naked women on the stage behind him, grinding on one another, did nothing for him. Nor did the woman masturbating in the cage behind the bar. The only things having any kind of effect on his semi-dead conscious were the blinding strobe lights and the deafening music. They hurt both his ears and his eyes.
He took another gulp of the whiskey. The warm brown liquid slid over his taste buds without leaving an impression, then burned his throat as it coated it.
“Ready for another?” A burly man behind the bar shouted over the music.
Dev didn’t even spare the man a glance before waving him off. He’d learned in the first month after Kira left that no amount of alcohol dimmed the pain. He could drink himself senseless and still felt it. Pain so thick and suffocating he wished he were dead just so he’d get a reprieve, but he knew he didn’t deserve one, he’d done this to himself with a little help from Barbara and he’d broken an innocent woman’s heart in the process. No, he was a damn fucker and deserved whatever he got at this point.
It’d been nearly six months now and he mostly just stared at the alcohol in the glass for long periods of time. That didn’t help, either. But in a strange way, it was meditative, and kept him from getting into more trouble than he would have otherwise.
Not much more than a soulless husk now and had been ever since he let her walk away, ever since he’d said exactly the things he knew would make her. But she didn’t belong in his world, and he sure the hell hadn’t belonged in hers. He’d tried it, had gotten an apartment near by but couldn’t stand being caged. He couldn’t stand the way all her friends looked at him as if they new. Couldn’t stand the way her family patronized him while trying to talk her away from him. He’d done the best thing for her. She was better off without him. Kira was a butterfly, beautiful and colorful with no limitations. He’d been like an anchor around her neck and it would have only been a matter of time before she realized it, before she’d walked away of her own volition. This would simply save them time in the long run, but he couldn’t help wondering if she would ever forgive him—if she realized that he hadn’t meant it and only did it to save her from the horror her life would have become tied to him.
Some nights, he comforted himself with the thought that she understood. That she went to bed at night with kind thoughts of him in her heart. Sweet memories of how he’d loved her and not the hate he’d seen slowly work its way into her eyes before she turned her back on him forever.
He dropped his head to the sticky surface of the bar, the pain seizing his heart as
the memories seized his mind.
He touched her chin, knowing it would be the last time she would ever let him touch her body and bleeding internally at the truth of it. “Sweetheart, it was planned this way from the beginning.” He purposefully made his tone cold, made himself seem heartless, then leaned close, delivering the death blow in a whisper. “I just wanted to fuck a hot, juicy virgin pussy. Wanted to shove my cock in someplace where no one else had been yet.”
Shock and disbelief shuttered her eyes, then she tried to argue with him. His gut was twisting with pain and regret to the point he thought death was imminent and he would have welcomed it gladly.
“You loved me.”
He laughed with bitter inflection.
“Love? I never said those words to you.” Didn’t matter that it was true. He’d saved her by never telling her and now he was glad he did. “Besides, haven’t you heard? All that time with Barbara and she never told you?”
She took a step back as if she knew what he was about to do and he knew it was working. She doubted him. It was what he wanted after all, so why did her lack of faith in his love, spoken or not, make him hurt so? Her life was too precious to give up to the likes of him, that’s what mattered, not his stupid heart.
“I’m incapable.”
“No.” He saw uncertainty swim in her beautiful golden eyes. “You never had to say the words, I knew. The way you touched me, the things we shared. It was real, you loved me.”
His eyes softened, his arms ached to hold her, to tell her to forget everything he’d said, call it temporary insanity, but they’d only end up back here again anyway. He knew he had to go in for the kill. He would gladly have given his own life rather than hurt her like this. He thought of his mother and his sister, the pain in his mother’s eyes that last day and knew this was the only way.
“Barbara wanted to fuck you, too, but I knew that first night your cunt was just too sweet to share.” He choked on his laugh. “In the end, I fucked you both, didn’t I? Literally and figuratively.”
