“My mom tried her own therapy while my dad looked the other way. She beat the shit out of me with the slightest indication I wasn’t normal. She called me the devil’s child, believing the only reason I was like this was because the devil put me in her womb. Doesn’t make sense since it was her blood that made me the way I was in the first place, but that’s how she rationalized it.”
“Goddess. I really want to kill your mother, Josh.”
“So did I. I stayed there until I was eighteen, and then I joined the military. I never looked back. I got some papers in the mail a couple years ago saying my dad had died from a heart attack and my mom had killed herself in grief. They gave the ranch to an uncle and left me out of the will. But I’m okay with that, honestly.”
“I wish you would have been able to resolve some of the differences, but frankly, I don’t know if you could have done that in this case.”
Josh laughed. “Not so much. But I found another form of family in the SEALs. I used my Finding sparingly, only when I truly needed it. But I didn’t tell anyone about it. I didn’t trust anyone enough.”
“Well, I’m glad you trust us enough.”
Warmth spread over him at her words. They loved him. Truly. He wasn’t alone. Didn’t have to hide. He’d told Hannah his past, and she hadn’t run away. Jesus, that felt good.
He looked down at her face, her big gray eyes, her pouty lips, and fell just that much more in love. He brushed a speck of dirt off her cheek then framed her face with his hands. This was it. His perfection. His future. Those dove gray eyes looked up at him with the unending love and support. Mix in the jade green from the man he loved and shared and Josh felt complete. He sighed. It was everything.
He leaned down and kissed her, the taste of bitter apples and honey melting on his tongue. He could drown in her taste and never get enough.
His body shuddered, and a graying darkness crept behind his eyes, pulling him deep, tearing at their bond. The bond trembled but stayed true. Josh lifted his head, curled his lip, and grabbed Hannah’s ass, lifting her to the bench.
“Josh,” she gasped.
He lowered his head and took her lips, shutting her up as he tore off their clothes. Lowering his mouth, he nibbled her jaw, her neck, then down her breastbone to her nipples. He bit down. Hard.
She buckled off the bench, lifting herself toward his face. He grabbed her and lifted, and she wrapped her legs around his waist, her core wet and hot against his dick. Josh kicked the clothes out of the way so he wouldn’t trip and slammed her against the wall, not caring if he hurt her. Somewhere deep inside, he knew this was too hard, too brutal, but he didn’t care. He only needed more of her. He took her bottom lip between his teeth and closed his eyes, too afraid they’d glow red like before and scare the shit out of her. Or worse, show her his secrets.
He positioned himself at her opening, her wetness telling him she was ready. In one thrust, he was inside, her pussy clenching around him.
“Josh,” she screamed.
He reared back and slammed home again. And again. Her breasts bounced, and his balls clenched. He moved one hand up and brushed her clit. She came in a rush, her heat pulsating around his cock.
Josh lifted her, still deep inside, and pivoted, laying her on the table, knocking pots and dirt on the floor. He grunted, gripped her hips, and thrust. His body shook, his balls rising, ready for him to come. Hannah lay below him, eyes wide with passion, a rosy glow from her climax covering her skin, herbs and soil spreading on that milky flesh. He pistoned, grappling for that last shred of control before he lost it. She came again, a scream on her lips, and he followed right behind her.
He stood over her boneless form and took a deep breath.
What the hell had just happened?
Josh pulled out, his seed still spilling. Shaken, he reached for some towels and cleaned her. He didn’t want to taint her with whatever he was. What if they made a child? Would it be like him? Maybe his mom had been right. Maybe he really was Satan’s child.
He wiped her hips and cursed when he saw bruises clear as day in the shape of his hands. He was a monster, a fucking lowlife who didn’t deserve the pixie in front of him.
Hannah looked up at him, her smile fading. “Josh? What’s wrong?” She looked down and furrowed her brows. “It’s okay. It’s only a little bruise. I’ll heal in a couple of hours. I liked it, really. I never knew you could be so powerful. You didn’t hurt me.”
Josh shook he head. “But I did.”
“But I wanted it. Don’t worry, Josh. I like how every time we make love it’s new and different.”
Happiness exuded from her, but he couldn’t trust it. This time she’d been lucky he hadn’t broken her. But what about the next time? What about when he couldn’t control the beast inside of him?
Chapter 22
The sun shone through the windows, warming Hannah’s bare shoulders, her bruises long gone in the days since their love-making. But she still remembered them, felt them. She sat in Reed’s studio, wearing only a sundress though it was winter, letting Reed sketch her. Her curly hair framed her face and tickled her back and shoulders.
She’d lied. Josh had scared her. Not the rough sex. No, that she’d liked. What had scared her was the way he’d turned into himself, like he wasn’t really present. So internal, her Josh. He was doing his best not to be, but he still kept parts hidden, parts she feared would break out and destroy something she held dear. Not only their bond, but Josh himself.
Reed was so different from Josh. More open, more emotional. Yet he, too, hid a part of himself. This mate always had to be the smiling one—the happy one in his family. But he felt emotions so deep that it scared her and she was so happy he had her and Josh to lean on. With the amount of turmoil surrounding the Jamensons, Reed needed them because, if he leaned too far, he’d break. And she couldn’t deal with that either.
“Hey, what do you guys want for dinner?” Josh asked, pulling her out of her increasingly depressing thoughts.
Reed smiled and laughed.
“What? Am I missing something?” Hannah asked. How on earth had that been funny?
“No, it’s not funny; it’s just that I’m happy.” Reed shrugged, laughter still dancing in his eyes. “I love the fact the three of us are doing this. You know, the whole domestic bliss thing.”
Josh shook his head, the edge of his mouth turned up in a slight smile. Hannah wanted to hold them both close to her and never let go.
“Well,” Josh grumbled, “someone needs to cook. I’ll die if I’m forced to live on a diet of cheese quesadillas and yogurt. I have no idea how the two of you have made it as long as you have. Reed especially.”
Hannah rubbed her stomach. “Greek yogurt is manna. Yum.”
“Sure,” Josh answered. “I’ll make rosemary pork chops then.”
“Uh, Josh, what does that have to do with yogurt?” she asked.
“You could dip it in the yogurt,” Reed answered, a pleased grin on his face.
Josh smacked him upside the head, a fake scowl on his face.
“No, that’s gross. I want rosemary pork chops and the two of you aren’t any help. No yogurt.” Josh said.
“Hey, but what if I wanted yogurt?” Hannah whined, just to see the look on Josh’s face.
He sighed and kissed her lips, lingering. “Fine, you can have it on the side. The things I do for love. Okay, I’ll go take out the meat, then I need to head out to Kade’s. He’s going to train me on enforcer duties. I shouldn’t be home too late. Kade said he wanted to be with Finn and Mel early.”
He kissed them both and left.
“Okay, now quit moving,” Reed said, and went back to his sketch.
Hannah watched, the graceful way his hands flew over the page. His talent amazed her. The utter beauty of his project and the way he immersed himself in every work he did just showed the breadth of his passion.
A passion that he’d used on both her and Josh last night.
“I don�
�t know what I’m doing,” she blurted out.
Reed paused. “With what?”
“With two men. This whole thing. I mean, this is so unlike me.”
Her heart thudded in her chest, and her mouth went dry. But she couldn’t take those words back, though she desperately wanted to. The thoughts and worries churning in her mind since she’d met the two of them struggled to get out. It wasn’t that she didn’t love them—she did. She couldn’t, however, move on without talking about the fact they were a freaking threesome, something so taboo that only people in romance novels ever made it work. But this wasn’t one of those—this was real life.
Reed set down his pad and pencil and walked toward her and cupped her face.
“We aren’t just two men. We’re your mates.”
“I know, but it’s so weird. I mean, not what we’re feeling because that’s incredible. But the idea of it just seems wrong. Everything’s happened so fast.”
Reed laughed. Okay. Not the ideal reaction. She bit her lip and fought the urge to hit him. How could he laugh at her feelings?
“You aren’t the only one who’s thought it, baby,” Reed finally answered.
Wait. Was he regretting everything? Her heart pounded, and her eyes widened.
Reed held her close and shook his head against hers. “That isn’t what I meant. It’s just with the fire, the war, Adam, you, Josh, the demon…” Reed pulled back and shrugged. “Everything.”
Reed leaned down, and she rested her forehead on his. “I know, I’m happy. Really.” Wow, she seemed to be clarifying that a lot recently. “Any doubts I may have, I’m overcoming them. And I feel as though I know both of you so much better. But, Reed, you have so much history. I need to know more. You know?” Geez, first Josh, now Reed. She kept pulling and prying. Pretty soon she’d poke where she shouldn't, and she just might lose them. But she needed to know.
Hannah put her fingers on his lips when he tried to speak. She needed to get this out before she lost her nerve. “Not now. The three of us will get it over time. But I was a shop owner and a potion maker with my mom.” Her voice caught, but she pushed down her pain. “I lived with my mom for most of my life. That’s what I thought I would do. I would live a normal life span and maybe find a witch husband and grow old. I’m not sorry I didn’t get that—I’m blessed. But I need to be more independent of the two of you and still be intertwined.”
Reed kissed her softly. Heat pooled in her womb, but her mind whirled. “That’s what a relationship is. Independence and connection. We will find the balance. Our bond is different because there are three of us and also because we aren’t human. We are putting in three different types of people and melding them. Everything will calm down, at least with the three of us.”
“And what about the outside world?” she asked.
Reed sighed. “Well, that’s usually Adam’s responsibility. But he’s not here. Dad and the others say they can still feel him, so we know he’s alive. But he’s hurting. I hate that he’s in this position, in so much pain.”
“But there’s nothing we can do about it,” Hannah said softly. “We can only care for him when he gets back.”
Reed choked, “I don’t know how Adam can do it. I don’t know what I’d do if I lost the two of you.”
“I guess the best we can do is don’t think about it. Submerse ourselves in the time we have and protect the Pack from what could come; it’s all we can do.”
“I love how wise my mate is.”
“Well, it’s true. I pretty much rock.”
“That you do.” He leaned down, kissed her nose, then trailed his lips on her cheek and found her mouth.
He tasted of sandalwood, wolf, and that special something she couldn’t describe but was all Reed. She melted into his arms, worries and stresses of their conversation fluttering away as their kiss intensified.
Reed pulled back, his pupils dilated with passion. Goddess, she loved that smile. In it she could see their future, their love, and his nature, everything she never thought she’d wanted but everything she so desperately needed.
“Stay right there,” Reed whispered. “I have plans for you.”
Intrigued, she followed his path with her gaze as he carefully laid out a large drop cloth on the floor then went to a drawer and pulled out paint.
What was he doing? Weren’t they going to make love? Why was he going to paint her? Now?
“Hey,” he said, then kissed her softly. “Don’t look like that. I told you I had plans for you.” He picked her up and set her down on the cloth, then stripped her of her clothes, his fingertips tracing warm circles on her flesh as he did so.
Okay, this could be interesting.
He stood there, fully dressed, looking sexy as sin and undeniably hers.
“I love you, Hannah.”
She didn’t get a chance to respond because he crushed his mouth to hers, her nipples rubbing against the soft cotton of his shirt, sending tingles down her spine. He gripped her sides, rocking against her, then lowered them both to the ground. Kneeling, he stripped off his clothes quickly, then bent over to get a paintbrush.
Her breath quickened at the look on his face. His eyes had lowered and looked of molten heat.
“I’ve always wanted to paint you,” he whispered.
“I thought that’s why you sketched me.”
“Oh, I’m going to paint your portrait, no doubt. But right now, I’m going to use these edible paints I bought and stroke you until you come. What do you say to that?”
She moaned. “Yes, please.”
Reed smiled and picked up a brush and dipped into the blue. Her pulse raced as he slowly teased her stomach with the tip, and she shivered.
“It’s cold.”
“Let me warm you up then,” he purred.
That was the response she was hoping for.
He leaned over and kissed her stomach, licking around the paint, nibbling her flesh. He raised his gaze, his long lashes utterly erotic surrounding his jade green eyes. Then he took one long lick in the paint, spreading it over her stomach.
Dear goddess.
“Tastes like sugar.” He dipped the brush again, painting swirls and leaves along her torso, arms, and legs. Every time she wanted to move because he teased her so well, he tapped her with the end of the brush.
“Stop moving,” he scolded. “I’m concentrating.”
“But I want you. Please.”
“You’ll have me soon, I promise.”
He changed brushes, this time using the silver paint. She bucked off the cloth when he bent and took her nipple in his mouth. He suckled and bit down, sending shockwaves of heat down to her core. When he released her, he trailed the tip of the brush around her areola, and she gasped.
She’d die if he did any more foreplay. She was burning up from the inside out, basking in her need of him.
But he didn’t relent; he merely painted her other breast until she squirmed with need.
“There. My masterpiece is complete.” Reed sat back on his haunches, looking like a cat with a big bowl of cream.
“Are you just going to look at me? Touch me. Please.” Who was this girl begging for attention?
“Oh, I’ll touch you. I’m going to lick every inch of you, then I’m going to take you,” he promised.
“Can we skip the licking part? Not that that doesn’t sound amazing, but I want you. Now.” She moaned.
Reed gave a throaty chuckle, and she wanted to hit him. “Patience.”
“Screw patience. Screw me.”
He lifted a brow. “I like that mouth on you. I’d like it better on me. But that’ll be later.” Then he proceeded to lick every square inch of paint off her body like a starving man. She moaned and ached at every touch, every nibble, his touch sliding in every crevasse.
When he sucked her nipples into his mouth, she grabbed his hair to keep him there. Tendrils of heat curled around her body, soaking into her skin, bringing her closer and closer to climax. But every time sh
e reached the edge, he pulled her back.
Damn frustrating man.
She closed her eyes, climbing to reach her peak, until she felt something blunt circle her lower lips and flick against her clit. She opened her eyes, wondering what it could be, and froze. Reed kneeled between her legs, a clean paintbrush in his hands and the rounded end without the brush playing with her pussy.
“These are clean, ready for you. I wanted to paint you, and I will,” Reed growled.
She smiled and shook, then he dipped the end all the way in. The brush wasn’t as wide as Reed or Josh, but felt so wonderful and smooth in her swollen channel. He slowly moved his wrist in a small circle, the edge of the brush rubbing against her g-spot. She almost came right there, but he pulled back, teasing.
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