She tiptoes and talks into some dude’s ear. He stands as if he prides himself on his good looks. His massive shoulders fill the coat he wears.
It’s as if she senses me, her head turns in my direction and her eyes connect with mine. She freezes when she sees my eyes solidly fix on her. She stares back at me with those piercing dark eyes. They widen and her lips curl into a smile before she leans back and says something in his ear.
I bunch my fists at my side. She’s watching the play of emotions on my face. I will not let her see that I am fuming. My blood is boiling. How could she do this in front of me? Was that for my benefit? I know her. Morgan knows what buttons to push and she just pushed the detonate button. My temper flares, but I need to reign it in. I won’t give her the satisfaction of knowing how she affects me.
She glances to her right, then left looking for an escape route. She turns on her heels and heads toward the office. The guy she’s with watches her intently when she walks away.
A waitress bearing a tray of drinks brushes by me. “Hey, Linc, good to see you.”
I nod my head at the waitress, I think her name is Lauren. I could be wrong. I’m never good at keeping up with the names of the waitresses, since the turnover in this industry is so high.
I pursue Morgan from across the club. When I catch up to her, my fingers take her arm with gentle authority and I lead her farther down the hallway. She pulls her arm free and turns to face me.
In a defensive gesture, she folds her arms across her chest. “What are you here for, Lincoln? I’ve emailed you all the nightly money drops and Christian stops by each night to make sure things are running smoothly.”
“I know Christian’s been by. It’s still my club, remember?” I quirk an eyebrow questioningly. Shit, I need to play this cool. Not be a smart ass.
She lifts her brow, shocked to hear those words come out of my mouth. Yeah, it was cocky, even arrogant of me to say that. But I want to see some emotion. Something to know that she isn’t numb to me.
“It’s your club,” she barks out. “That’s the game we’re going to play now? I’ve ran this place since the doors opened. How dare you play that card with me!”
“Slow your jets, Morgan. I didn’t come here to fight with you. I came by simply to check on things. If you’re going to continue to run Redemption, you and I are going to have to be able to be civil with each other and work together.”
She nods. When she doesn’t speak, I continue to talk. I want to keep her here for as long as I can. The longer she’s in this hallway with me, she isn’t out there with that guy.
“Despite what you think, I want you to be happy. If I didn’t make you happy, then I want you to find what does.”
Who am I kidding? I don’t mean a word of that horseshit. I wonder if she’s buying it. I want her. I’m what makes her happy. At least at one time, I did.
My gaze drifts up her body, focusing on her lips. The lips that I want to kiss. I narrow my eyes, my thoughts sober, losing all amusement when I see hurt in her eyes.
Nervously she moistens her lips. “Don’t think you didn’t make me happy, Lincoln. We came to a fork in the road. I went one way, and you went the other. We wanted different things.”
“We want the same things, Morgan. I want you by my side every day. I want to be with you.”
A flush creeps slowly up her chest, her neck. Tears slowly find their way down her cheeks. “I can’t do this here. I have a club to run and I can’t have my staff see me a mess.”
She turns and walks away leaving me with an inexplicable feeling of emptiness. As I watch her walk away I watch every dream I ever had walk away with her.
The guy she was talking to moments ago meets her at the end of the hallway. I see him say something to her, but she shakes her head at him and continues past him leaving him standing there alone.
I proceed down the hall, slowing when I approach the guy making sure to get a good like at him. He’s fairly tall, good looking and his dark eyes are framed with black glasses. He looks familiar. I’ve seen him before, but I can’t place him.
“You see that girl.” Pointing in the direction Morgan just walked. “Stay away from her. Don’t even think you have a chance with her. She’s mine.” I turn and walk away, not waiting for a response.
“Bleeding Out” by Imagine Dragons spills from the speakers. How appropriate is this song to how I feel, especially after that run in with Morgan?
There’s nothing left to say. I’m giving up. The ball is in her court.
A chill runs down my spine. She’s close. I can feel her. When I turn to my right, she’s within reach talking to one of the bartenders. I grasp my hand into a fist so I don’t reach out to touch her. I look at her intently then stride to the door. I need to get out of here, before I pull her into my arms and beg her to come back to me.
MORGAN
“Maybe you really did love me, just not in the way that I loved you.”
– Unknown
Tears slowly trickle down my cheeks. “I can’t do this here. I have a club to run and I can’t have my staff see me a mess.”
I turn and walk away leaving Lincoln behind me. It’s all I ever do… walk away. Rather today, I’m running. I can’t handle the emotions of seeing Lincoln after three weeks that are rioting inside of my chest.
Greg is at the end of the hall waiting for me. “Are you okay?” he asks.
I shake my head. “No, I need to get back to work.” I push my way past him through the crowd.
Bleeding Out by Imagine Dragons fills the room. I don’t know what he wants me to say. I told him what I wanted. We don’t want the same thing. We aren’t even together, and things are still miserable between us.
The hair on my arms stand and goosebumps blanket my arms. I can sense that Lincoln is near. I can feel his eyes on me without even turning around. When I find the courage to glance over my shoulder, I see him. I’m suddenly anxious to escape his disturbing presence. He looks at me intently, his eyes hooded like a hawk. He turns and leaves. Once the door closes, I can finally let out the breath I’m holding.
“Stripped” by Shiny Toy Guns filters throughout the club as soon as the Imagine Dragons song ends. I choke on the lump in my throat as stupid tears sting the back of my eyes. I will not cry.
After all these years, he doesn’t deserve anymore of my tears. How long will the hurt hold onto me? Do I have a right to be hurt since I’m the one who walked away? I’m unsteady. I’m alone. If he loved me, would he have let me go? If he loved me, would he have let me walk away without a fight? After all that we’ve been through. Eight years is a long time. Seeing him tonight brought all the anger to the surface again.
My misery is so severe it now verges on physical pain.
After the run in with Lincoln last night, this is exactly what I need. A night with my girlfriends. Laughter fills my living room. Karsen has the night off from her hectic schedule at the hospital. Lindsey and Camryn knocked at my door with bottles of wine in hand and Cards Against Humanity tucked securely under their arm.
So game night, it is. This is exactly what I need. A night of laughing with my best friends. The game is simple. Each round, one player asks a question from a black card and everyone else answers with their funniest white card. Karsen flips her black card and it reads, ‘This is the way the world ends. Not with a bang, but with this.’
We toss our cards in the middle. Karsen mixes them up and reads them out loud.
‘72 virgins.’
‘An Etsy steampunk strap on.’
‘A big thick dick.’
We all laugh. “I love this game.” Camryn says.
Hours pass as we turn cards over and continue to fill our drinks. It’s well after midnight and we are all feeling pretty good. The wine is doing its job perfectly.
The last set of cards have Karsen laughing the loudest.
My card reads, ‘What do old people smell like?’
The girls lay their cards in the middle and I mix t
hem up.
The first card I read says, ‘The primal ball-slapping sex your parents are having right now.’
Camryn lifts her hand in the air, “that was mine. I couldn’t resist.”
“That’s disgusting. Come on, Cami. Really,” Lindsey says shoving Camryn’s shoulder.
I don’t even finish reading the rest of the cards as we all laugh hysterically.
Karsen lifts her wine glass to her lips. She takes a sip and places it back on the table. “I so needed this. This has been the week from hell at the hospital. Each night the cases were more difficult than the last.”
“I don’t know how you do it every day,” Lindsey says.
“For me there was no moment of divine intervention. I’ve always known nursing would be the perfect career for me.”
“You have a natural calling for it. You were amazing when I needed you. When I needed a friend,” Camryn says.
Karsen places her hand over Camryn’s and gives it a squeeze. “It is also very rewarding to feel that my input, no matter how small, has an effect on the lives of those I am in charge of caring for,” Karsen replies. “But enough about me, how are you holding up?” Karsen asks me.
I take a mouthful of my wine and place it on the table in front of me. “I knew it wouldn’t be easy. I knew we would see each other, but I didn’t expect it to hurt so much.”
“What did you expect?” Camryn asks, all judgment void from her voice.
I sigh heavily, my voice filled with anguish. “Not to feel like this.”
Camryn raises her drink to her lips and takes a long sip. She tilts her head to the side, “Christian said you had a run-in with Lincoln at Redemption last night. How did that go?”
“I didn’t think he would stay away forever. To be honest I was shocked that he had Christian play the go-between for us for as long as he did. He was bound to show up at the club. He just showed up at the worst moment.”
“Why, what happened?” Lindsey asks.
“I was talking to a guy when I felt his eyes on me. I made a quick exit to the office to avoid a scene, but you know Lincoln, he followed in quick pursuit.”
Camryn leans on her elbows on the table and steeples her fingers together under her chin.
Her expression was grim as she watches me. “What, why are you looking at me like that?” I ask.
“I was told you put on quite a little show for Lincoln with this guy. Was that to make him jealous, or simply for your enjoyment?” Camryn raises her brow at me.
A suffocating sensation tightens my throat. I close my eyes, feeling utterly miserable. “I was wrong, okay. I’ll admit it,” I say.
“Just make sure you know what you’re doing. Two can play that game.” Camryn adds. A bitter jealousy stirs inside me.
“If you keep playing this game, you’re only going to push Lincoln into the arms of another woman. Then what? What will you do then? Do you think you’ll be able to stand to see Lincoln with another woman? Will you be able to see him kiss another woman, touch another woman in front of you? You run his club, Morgan. Unless you find a new job, you are bound to cross paths with him and whoever is on his arm.”
Camryn’s words hit me hard. They knock the wind out of me. I have to face the harsh realities of my actions.
“Oh, my God. I never even thought about that possibility. I think I made a mistake by leaving him,” I reply in a low tormented voice.
LINCOLN
“Missing someone is part of loving them. If you’re never apart, you’ll never really know how strong your love is.”
– Malika E. Nura
It’s Friday night and patrons are lined up in rows around the bar area in Aces. I’m helping out behind the bar tonight since one of my bartenders called out sick. The waitresses are hollering orders to me and the other bartender as they weave through the masses with trays held high in the air.
Side Effects is set up and ready to go. Jamie screams into the mic, “Hello, everyone!” I look around the place. He manages to pack the bar every night they perform. I’m proud of my best friend. He’s making a name for himself in the industry both as an artist as well as a music producer.
“How’s everyone doing tonight?” Jamie smiles as he speaks into the mic.
The cheers from the mass of people is deafening. Jamie waits for the crowd to go quiet, then he cups his palm to his ear. “I don’t think I can hear you.” He works the crowd into chaos again. My eyes scan the dance floor, which is packed with a sea of people. I spot Christian, Camryn, Karsen, and Lindsey at their usual table near the stage.
All the lights in Aces shut off, leaving the bar black except for the lights behind me lining the back of the bar. The place is completely quiet when the drummer, Isaac, taps out a few thumps on the drums. Parker joins in with a few simple chords on his guitar. The crowd erupts, immediately recognizing the fan-favorite song.
I hear someone call out, “Three Miller Lites.”
Moving quickly, I grab the beers from the cooler. When I go to hand them to the guy, I halt when I recognize him. Son of a bitch. It’s the dude who was with Morgan last week at Redemption. I lean to the side and look over his shoulder. Sure enough, Morgan is at the table with our friends.
Fury almost chokes me. She has the balls to bring this douche to my bar. To hang with my friends.
The guy goes to pay me. I wave it off. “Don’t worry about it. This round’s on me. Tell Morgan I send my regards,” I say in a cool tone.
He eyes me suspiciously, then nods his chin. “Thanks, man. I appreciate it.”
I give him a curt nod and move onto the next customer. I need to keep my hands busy before I grab him by his collar and slam his face into the bar.
I knew this was going to be difficult but I never thought she would pull something like this. She crossed the line with this stunt.
The lines thin out at the bar. With long, purposeful strides I head over to the group. “How’s everyone making out? You good on drinks?” I ask as I look directly at Morgan.
Lindsey and Karsen both look at Morgan, then to the guy by Morgan’s side. “We’re good. Thanks for the drinks,” Lindsey says and winks.
Morgan sits in her chair, her thin fingers tense in her lap. Biting her lip, she looks away. She refuses to make eye contact with me.
Camryn jumps up from her seat and wraps her arms around my neck. She leans close to my ear, “Please don’t make a scene, Linc. Not here. Not now.” She pulls back. Her hazel eyes dart nervously back and forth between Morgan and me.
My mouth thins with displeasure. Camryn mouths, “Please.”
A muscle flicks angrily in my jaw. I lean in and kiss her on her forehead. “Okay.” I lean back and she forces a smile on her face.
Camryn leans in close to my ear again. “Give her space, sweetie. She’ll make her way back to you.”
I shake my head disapprovingly. “I hope you’re right, but I refuse to stand by and watch her parade some dude in my bar or my club. That’s where I put my foot down. She wanted space, I’ll give her all the space she wants, but not on these terms.”
I step in Morgan’s line of vision, blocking her view of the stage. “Care to join me in the office for a moment.” My tongue was heavy with sarcasm.
She looks up at me, her eyes are icy and unresponsive. “I’m enjoying the show. Can we do this another time?”
I lean in close to her ear, so only she can hear. “No, I’d like to speak to you now,” I growl. “I don’t want to make a scene, but I will throw you over my shoulder if you don’t move that tiny little ass in about five seconds.”
She jumps to her feet. I grab her hand and pull her along behind me toward my office. My footsteps thundering down the hall.
“Lincoln, stop. You can’t just drag me away from the table,” she mutters hastily.
“The hell I can’t.”
I push the office door open forcefully and pull Morgan in behind me. Once we are inside, I let go of her hand and slam the door shut. I walk forward, for
cing her to take several steps backward. I cage her against the door. Looking down at her intensely.
I don’t care whether I hurt her or not with what I’m about to say. “Are you fucking him?” I growl.
She gasps, then pushes against my chest, putting distance between us. Her expression was like I’d struck her in the face.
Her temper flares. “How dare you ask me that? Go to hell,” she spat out the words harshly.
I hold my hand out to silence her. “Answer me.”
She shoves my chest and I take a step back. “What the hell is wrong with you?” she snaps. Her eyes blazing with anger. “You know me better than that. Do you think that low of me?” Her eyes convey the fury within her. She shoves me a third time.
“Answer me,” I roar. My patience is running out and my temper flares. Rage boils through my body.
She shoves against my chest again. But I don’t budge.
“Fuck you,” she screams in my face, then slaps me.
The crack of skin contacting skin echoes off the walls. Vibrations of pain start in my cheek and spread all the way to my mouth. Well, that’s a first. In all the years we’ve been together, she has never hit me. I guess there’s a first for everything.
She stares at me with her eyes wide as her hand slowly makes it to her fire-red lips. Her hand covers her mouth, as if she’s shocked she hit me.
I step toward her and she takes a step back until her back hits the door again. I rub my hand across my mouth. In an instant, she has me feeling like a no-good bastard. She’s right, do I think that low of her? Do I think she would crawl out of my bed and right into another man’s?
“How could you think that?” she chokes out.
“What I am supposed to think? You bring some guy to my bar. The same guy I saw you with last week at Redemption,” my voice lowers.
“It’s not like that,” her voice softens.
“I would never do that to you. I would never bring another girl around and rub your nose in it.”
Unspoken Promises (The Unspoken Love Series Book 2) Page 13
