by Ali Parker
I took a deep breath and moved to flop into one of the chairs. Jack took it as his cue to have a seat on the couch. There were times when I wished I were closer to my brothers. Times when I thought it would be nice to have a big brother on my side, willing to back me up and support me in my decisions. Then I remembered how my brothers treated me and realized I didn’t have that kind of family.
“I haven’t talked to her. I probably won’t either. What’s done is done,” I grumbled.
“Mason, if you like this girl, you have to put some effort into it,” he lectured.
I shot him a glare. “Don’t even start trying to talk to me about girl problems. I don’t have girl problems. You and Grayson show up in my life and ruin the one good thing I have. You two are to blame for the current problem. I don’t need your help. I’ve been living my life as a solo act for more than a decade. I’m still alive. I’m not in prison. I don’t need you. I don’t need any of you.”
“We’re your family. We all need one another,” he said in a low voice.
“Doesn’t feel that way on my end.”
“Mason, it was an innocent mistake. It could all be cleared up. What’s her name? Where is she from? I’d like to get to know this woman who has finally managed to grab your attention,” he joked.
“Nope. You don’t get to walk in here and pretend you give a damn. Besides, like I said, you fucked it all up.”
“Listen, I’ve apologized. You can make it right with her. If she doesn’t believe you, that’s more on you than it is me or Grayson,” he said firmly.
“Jack, I’m telling you this one very last time; I need you to quit trying to fix me and my life. Believe it or not, I’m quite content with how I live. I’m content with being single. If I decide to try and work things out with Adelaide, that’s my business.” I glowered at him.
He grinned. “Adelaide. We’re making progress,” he said with a laugh.
There was no deterring him. He was going to keep bugging me. Jack was always the peacekeeper. I knew he hadn’t intentionally set out to destroy what I was hoping was something with Adelaide. He didn’t know about her. To be fair, I had made it very clear a long time ago I was never going to get saddled with a serious girlfriend and definitely never a wife. They assumed I was single because I usually was. I was angry, but I had to admit my own responsibility. I could have done better. Things got out of hand because I let them.
“Fine, you’re forgiven for imploding what could have been a good thing,” I mumbled.
He was still smiling. “Thank you. I promise to never try and set you up with another woman for as long as I live.”
“Your wife too,” I replied.
“Trust me, she’s learned her lesson. She was already half afraid of you,” he said with a laugh.
“Good. I like people afraid of me. Usually that means they’ll leave me alone.”
“Where are you off to?” he asked casually.
“I don’t know. Wherever the road takes me,” I said honestly.
Jack shook his head. “I can’t imagine ever being that free,” he said almost wistfully.
“You tried it, remember? Rather, you thought about it. You and Nat, setting sail for the high seas and never looking back, remember?” I teased him.
He smirked. “True. I would have sucked at going rogue.”
“Yes, you would have.”
He got to his feet. I rose as well. He extended his hand and we shook, effectively calling a truce after the dustup the night before. If it had been Grayson, things probably would have ended up with punches being thrown. Jack was a far better mediator than any of us.
“I’ll see you around. Hopefully, you will come to a family dinner again. Maybe you can bring Adelaide,” he added with a grin.
“Don’t push it,” I warned him.
He laughed as he walked out the door. I was glad that part of my life had been ironed out. I still wasn’t ready to kiss and make up with all of them, but at least there wasn’t bad blood between us. I didn’t want to hang out with them, and I didn’t necessarily like them all the time, but they were my brothers. I knew life was short and with my lifestyle, I often pushed the limits of my guardian angel. I didn’t want to leave this world with anger in my heart.
I slid on my leather jacket, zipping it up, slipped on my backpack and then headed out the door with my helmet under my arm. A ride was always the best medicine for whatever ailed me. I needed to work it all out in my head and figure out how to talk to Adelaide. I wasn’t good at apologizing or explaining my actions. I normally did what I wanted and didn’t think twice about answering to anyone. I owed Adelaide an explanation at the very least. She didn’t have to believe me, but I had to say it, or I would always wonder what if.
Chapter 28
Adelaide
I wasn’t going to admit it to Deanna, but the morning workout had done the trick for me. My mind was clear, and I wasn’t feeling quite so angry. It was more of a smarting pain than the serious hurt of being betrayed by a man I thought I was falling for. I only needed one cup of coffee and felt like I had downed several. I was sure the high would wear off soon, but I was going to enjoy it while I had it.
“Good morning,” I greeted an older gentleman who’d walked through the door.
He nodded, clearly not the conversation type and made a beeline for the front counter. I picked up a few empty cups and tossed them in the trash, smiling at the few customers leisurely drinking their coffees of choice.
I had two extra helpers this morning, making it possible for me to roam about the seating area and jumping in when the line got long. I liked talking to the customers. This was how a business owner was supposed to act, I convinced myself. I wasn’t supposed to be working my ass off behind the counter as a solo employee. I needed to do more managing and less working, at least that’s what I had been told by another regular who ran a bunch of fast-food restaurants.
“How are you today, Miss Adelaide?” one of my customers asked.
I looked over and saw Mr. Standard, a man in his sixties, reading the newspaper. He had a full head of white hair and dark-brown eyes. He was tall and in pretty good shape for an older guy. He’d been widowed two years ago, not too long after I had opened the shop. I had spent hours talking to him in the weeks following his wife’s death. We’d become close—as close as an acquaintance could be at least.
He always reminded me of my dad. My dad had a full head of hair and that easygoing way about him. Every morning he would sit at our tiny dining room table, drink coffee, and read the paper in front of the window that always got full sun. He would have been like Mr. Standard had he been allowed to live into his sixties. Unfortunately, life had other plans for him, and he never got the chance to retire and spend long mornings in front of a window doing what he loved. Life was a cruel, cruel bitch.
“I’m doing well. You?” I asked, walking to his table.
“I’m doing very well. It’s a gorgeous Saturday morning, I’ve got good coffee and I’m alive,” he said with a small laugh.
I smiled. “That’s always a bonus. What are your plans for the weekend?”
“I’m headed to the cabin for the week,” he announced. “I couldn’t leave town with getting a nice cup of coffee.”
I smiled. “Good. You’ve been talking about getting away for a while now. Are you going alone?”
He shook his head. “An old friend of mine is going. I’m meeting him here.”
“I hope you have a great time. This is something you’ve needed,” I told him, knowing he’d just celebrated his wedding anniversary alone a few weeks ago.
“I do need it and sometimes you just have to jump in and do it even if there are a hundred little things that could use your attention. I’ve been putting it off for one reason or another, but I figure if I don’t do it, I never will,” he said with a small laugh.
“Are you going fishing?” I asked him, remembering our conversation from last week.
“That’s the plan.�
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“I hope you have a good time. Relax and don’t think about anything else,” I advised.
“I’m going to miss the coffee,” he said, holding up his cup.
I laughed. “I think you’ll survive. Inhale lots of fresh mountain air. I hear it’s better than any cup of coffee when it comes to invigorating the mind, body, and soul.” I winked.
“I wonder where you heard that from,” he said with a chuckle, knowing he was the one who was always telling me I needed a trip to the mountains to invigorate my mind, body, and soul.
I walked away, wiping down tables before grabbing a coffee pot and offering refills to the customers. Business had slowed down, giving me time to catch up on the administrative duties I had been putting off all week. It was my least favorite part of owning a business. I grabbed a bottle of water and walked into my tiny office, stopping at the door to stare at my desk piled with mail and invoices that needed entered into the computer.
I groaned, staring at the mess. If I were making more money, I could hire someone to take care of the billing and accounting. It was a tedious job and brought me no joy. I always put it off until the last minute. Payroll was due, which was the only real motivating factor.
I sat down in my chair and scanned the desk. I had several piles of paperwork. It was my own organizational system. It worked for me, but I had a feeling it would make neat freaks scream and run in the opposite direction. I could admit it left a little to be desired. I was a business owner, not a secretary.
I started on payroll first. That was easy and was handled by an outside service. I quickly input the information into the program and mentally crossed the task off my list. Then I turned my attention to the stack of mail that needed to be opened and gone through. Most of it would be junk with lots of offers for business credit cards and cheap deals on equipment.
I sorted out the junk and tossed it in the trash before digging into the bills. I opened a letter, not really paying much attention until I noticed the big red letters indicating I was past due.
“Oh shit. No.” I gasped, looking at the bill.
It was from my lease company. I looked at the calendar and realized we were already more than halfway through the month. How did I miss the lease payment? I quickly pulled up my record-keeping software. I always paid the bill at the first of the month. I went through each line item and realized I had missed it.
“Shit, shit, shit!” I grumbled, dropping the letter and putting my face in my hands.
There was a sick feeling of dread in my stomach. I couldn’t look at the screen. The numbers staring back at me were not pretty. I gave myself a few minutes to collect myself, calming the panic that was bubbling to the surface.
“Okay, okay, I can do this,” I whispered, staring at the accounting information.
I could pay the lease. I had to pay the lease. I couldn’t very well have a business if I didn’t have a place to hold said business. Lease first. I switched over the online payment portal and quickly submitted the payment along with the hefty late fee. I had never missed a payment before and couldn’t believe I had now. It was testament to how crazy things had been for me the past couple weeks. I knew the business was struggling but until I sat down and looked at the harsh reality of it, I could fool myself into believing it wasn’t that bad.
It was why I had been putting off the accounting. Now that I was staring at the cold reality of the matter, it was like being plunged into an ice bath. I guessed I could maybe stay open for another four to six months. I could let go of a couple staff to try and make it last a little longer—but to what end? I couldn’t possibly work twelve hours a day every day of the week. I would burn myself out. The few ladies I did have working for me were all college students who relied on the tips and small paycheck they earned from my shop.
I buried my face in my hands again. I felt like I was sinking with no one standing on the shore to throw me a rope. I thought about my dad and how disappointed he would be to know I couldn’t make it work. I hated to think of him looking down from above and shaking his head. I should have known better. I should have put in more effort to find that secret thing that would bring customers in. The competition around me was ridiculous. I offered quality coffee, but I had to get the people in the door first.
The dread of being out of a job and out of business by the same time next year soured my mood. I didn’t have to worry about Mason anymore. I had plenty of my own drama to deal with. I opened another envelope, paying the utilities one by one before doing my coffee order for the following week. I could downgrade the coffee and save some money I told myself.
“No. You opened the shop to sell the best,” I said aloud, needing the verbal reminder.
I didn’t want to be like all the other shops. I wanted to set myself apart. The problem was, my coffee was good, which meant it cost more and I had to charge more than other shops. I tried to keep my prices fairly competitive, but it was eating into my profits. I was stuck. I began to pour over my profit and loss report, looking for areas where I could cut costs. I was running a fairly tight ship, but it was going to have to get a lot tighter if I wanted to keep the doors open.
Something had to change. I wasn’t going to solve my business problems overnight. I needed some time to figure something out. I didn’t want to give up my dream of creating a legacy in my father’s name. I felt like I had done so little with my life. This was something I wanted to do to make him proud, to prove to him I was going to be okay. And I wasn’t. I was proving nothing.
I got up, needing to get out of the tiny office. I would drive myself crazy if I kept staring at the numbers. For now, I could take comfort in the fact the bills were paid for the month. I would be open another month. Maybe one of my competitions would sink. That would certainly be good for me, but I felt guilty at wishing for the demise of another business. There had to be enough customers for all of us.
“Are you okay?” one of the girls asked me.
“Yes, why?” I asked with confusion.
“We could hear you,” she said in a hushed voice.
“What?” I gasped, wondering how much they had heard.
“We didn’t hear what you were saying, mostly,” she said with a grimace.
“It’s fine. I’m fine. Everything is fine,” I muttered, grabbing the pot of coffee and heading back out to the seating area to offer refills.
I didn’t want to get into the details of my financial situation with my employees. It was for me to worry about. I needed them to focus on serving customers and being happy about doing so. I couldn’t afford to have all of us looking grim-faced.
Chapter 29
Mason
My trip out of town had done little to make me feel better about the way things had gone down on Friday night. I hadn’t slept hardly at all. I could only blame the shitty roadside motel I had crashed in for part of my lack of sleep. It was me tossing, turning, and trying to think of the right words. I really sucked at apologizing and I really sucked at trying to do the relationship thing. I wanted to do better for Adelaide. She was about the only person I had ever met who made me want to be a better man.
I didn’t bother showering in the nasty bathroom. I hadn’t bothered sleeping on the sheets either. The place was sketchy at best, but I had been beat and looking for anywhere to crash for a few hours last night after riding most of the day. I hadn’t gone anywhere in particular and ended up doing almost a full circle around the city.
When my phone rang, I almost didn’t answer it. I was expecting it to be one of my brothers. Things had been fixed between us. I didn’t want to keep rehashing the damn thing. Against my better judgment, I grabbed it and found Dalton’s number on the screen.
“Shit.” I moaned.
He knew. I knew it was only a matter of time before he called to bitch me out for screwing Adelaide over. I was surprised it had taken this long.
“Hello,” I answered, resigned to the lecture.
“Hey, let’s eat,” he blurted out.
“Uh, I’m not in town.”
“What? What the hell? Did you fly the coop?” he, then chuckled.
“No. Just a quick trip out of town. Why? What’s up?” I asked, knowing exactly what he wanted.
“How far away are you?”
“I don’t know, an hour or two,” I mumbled.
“Great. We’ll grab a late breakfast, brunch. Let’s meet at eleven, our usual spot,” he said.
The way he said it told me it wasn’t really open for debate. He was going to lecture me while looking at me. I could understand that. “I’ll be there,” I said and hung up.
I put on the clean underwear, little pit stick, and brushed my teeth before hitting the road. It was time to face the music. I’d explain what happened and I knew Dalton would understand. He knew my brothers and what kind of shit they could get up to.
The ride back to the city wasn’t nearly as enjoyable as the ride away. It was a metaphor for the way I lived my life. I was always going away from everything and everyone. I ran. I always ran, avoiding conflict and relationships, and taking the easy way out.
When I got to the restaurant, Dalton was there, along with Deanna. It was going to be double whammy. They were sitting on the patio, sipping coffee. The moment I sat down, the waitress asked if I wanted coffee. I wanted one of those things Adelaide had made me the other morning. I’d settle for the coffee.
“Let’s just get it out,” I said, looking from one to the other.
Dalton nodded. “I had no idea about you and Adelaide. Apparently, I was the last one to find out. You know how I feel about her, but I also have a feeling there is a good explanation.”
I nodded. “There is.”
“How was your date?” Deanna asked, a little snidely.
“Deanna, it wasn’t a date. At least, it wasn’t a date on my end.”
