by Luke Sharpe
I can’t believe it. My favorite athlete of all time walks out through the curtain, smiling and waving. The audience goes nuts.
Carl sits on the couch with Chris. “You know,” he says, “in all my years playing baseball, I’ve seen some real disasters, but this one takes the cake.”
“You think my career will survive this?” Chris asks.
“Oh, I think so,” Carl says. “But I don’t know about that Swiped fellow.”
“Dad,” I say, “are you recording this?”
“Yeah,” he says.
“Good, because this is the greatest thing I’ve ever seen on TV.”
Carl’s still talking about Alistair Swiped. “Of course, inventing’s a tough business. It might be even more competitive than professional baseball. I sure wouldn’t want to try it.”
Chris nods. “I agree. I think I’ll stick to hosting a talk show. Compared to inventing, that’s easy as pie.”
“Speaking of inventors,” Carl says, “you remember that kid, Billy Sure?”
WHAT?!
“Oh, absolutely,” Chris says. “We had him on my show. You were on that night. We tossed around the All Ball.”
“What is happening?” I say.
“Whatever it is, it’s very, very good,” Manny says, his eyes glued to the TV set. He’s grinning.
“Now there’s an inventor!” Carl says. “I wonder what he’s up to?”
“Let’s find out!” Chris says. He turns to the audience. “Should we call Billy Sure and ask him what he’s up to?”
The audience applauds!
“Hey, Sarah!” Chris calls offstage to an assistant. “Do you still have Billy Sure’s phone number from when he was on the show? Let’s call him right now!”
The assistant walks onstage dialing a cell phone. She hands the phone to Chris.
Our phone rings!
“I can’t believe this is happening!” I yell.
“Answer your phone!” Manny shouts.
I answer it. “Hello?”
“Hi, Billy!” Chris Fernell says. “I’m sitting here with an old pal of yours, Carl Bourette, and we were wondering if you’ve got any new inventions you’d like to tell us about!”
“I know,” I manage to say. “I’m watching you on TV.”
Chris laughs. “Keeping an eye on the competition, huh? Well, I don’t think you have to worry about Alistair Swiped anymore. So, what are you working on?”
I try to tell him about Disappearing Makeup, but I realize I don’t know what to say. I’m usually not really nervous when I have to talk about Sure Things, Inc. business, but this time I’m not prepared, and I’ve never really spent any time talking about makeup before. My mind goes completely blank.
“Ummm . . . Before I tell you about what we’re working on, can Carl Bourette maybe tell us who his favorite baseball player is? I’m dying to know.”
Carl immediately starts talking, and I figure I have about thirty seconds to come up with something to say about Disappearing Makeup. I try to line up a sales pitch in my head, but all I can think of is how Emily looked like a clown with all her makeup on. I look around the room frantically. Twenty seconds. Still nothing. Philo and my dad stare at me, and it feels like time has stopped. On the television, Carl Bourette wraps up whatever he was saying (I can’t believe I missed his answer!) and I know I have about five seconds to come up with something. Think! I tell my brain. Then I notice Manny signaling for me to give him the phone. He whispers, “Trust me.” And I do, of course. I hand him my phone.
Manny introduces himself and does this amazing double pitch, perfectly describing Disappearing Makeup and Stink Spectacular! He even renames the Disappearing Makeup “DISAPPEARING REAPPEARING MAKEUP,” which is a much better name. I’m so blown away by his perfect explanation of it (how does he know so much about the cosmetics industry offhand?) that I almost fall off my chair when he switches gears and starts talking about Stink Spectacular as well. The audience eats up everything he says.
Reason #732 Manny is my CFO: He’s brilliant.
The time flies by, and Chris Fernell wraps up the show. “Well, that’s all the time we have! Sorry about the start of our show, but wasn’t it great hearing about Sure Things, Inc.’s new inventions, Disappearing Reappearing Makeup and Stink Spectacular?”
The audience cheers again.
I can’t believe it.
Not only did we get sweet revenge on Alistair Swiped, but we also got to promote our newest product. Products, I should say!
“I can’t believe you decided to talk about Stink Spectacular, too!” I say to Manny.
“I realized that right after Stench Quench bombed was the perfect time to introduce Stink Spectacular as a gag gift that tastes delicious.”
“You think it’s delicious?”
“Definitely! Let’s have some more to celebrate!”
My dad just shakes his head. “That was the weirdest spy show I ever saw.”
Sure Things
MANNY AND I WORK REALLY hard to get Disappearing Reappearing Makeup and Stink Spectacular ready to sell as quickly as possible.
And after we launch them, sales take off!
I arrive at the office, fully expecting Manny to be glued to his computer, reviewing sales figures. But when I walk in, I’m surprised to see him standing at the free throw line. He launches the ball. Swish! He pumps his fist.
“FIFTY!”
“Fifty?” I say. “You just made fifty free throws in a row?!”
Manny nods, grinning.
“That’s fantastic! Don’t stop. Keep going!”
He shakes his head. “I hit my goal. I’ll set a new goal, but for now, I walk away.”
“I have something to show you,” I say. I take a picture out of my backpack.
“What’s this?” Manny asks.
“Disappearing Reappearing Makeup’s new model.”
“It’s Emily! But what about your dad?”
I sit down at my desk and smile. “He talked to my mom, and she said Emily’s old enough to wear makeup, so he’s cool with it. So Emily gets to be in our ads.”
“That’s great!” Manny says.
We laugh. My computer goes PING BONG BING! It’s a video chat request from my mom!
I click on “Answer With Video” and see her smiling face. She’s dressed all in black.
“Hi, honey!” she says. “I wanted to congratulate you and Manny again on a great job of counter-espionage! I assume there have been no more e-mails from the spy?”
“Well, there was one,” I say.
“Really?” she asks. “What did it say?”
“It said, ‘You win. For now!’ ”
She shrugs. “Well, that doesn’t sound too—”
Suddenly there’s a commotion behind her. “Oops! Gotta go!” she says.
But before she signs off, I’m pretty sure I see her swing into action, fighting off what looks like a bunch of ninjas!
I sit there, stunned. Then I realize Manny’s behind me. He saw the end of the call too.
“I’m telling you, dude,” he says. “Your mom’s definitely a spy!”
“You want this, boy?” I ask, waving Philo’s favorite chew toy at him.
Philo dashes over to where I’m sitting, and grabs one end of the toy in his teeth. He tugs hard, pulling me from my chair. I tumble to the rug, laughing. Letting go of my end of the toy, I put my arm around Philo and start to play-wrestle with him.
“What’s going on down there!” shouts Emily, my sister, from upstairs. “Some of us have homework to do, y’know!”
“Just playing with Philo,” I call back.
“Well, do it quietly!” she screams down.
I pick up Philo’s chew toy and wave it over my head. “Go get it!” I shout.
Philo turns and dashes after the rope. He snatches it up in his mouth, then trots toward me, dropping it at my feet.
“Again?” I ask.
“Ruufff!” he replies.
Sometimes it’s
as if I can actually understand what Philo is saying.
“One more time.” I toss the rope back over Philo’s head. It bounces a couple of times, then disappears into the dining room.
Philo turns and chases after it, but then he doesn’t come back.
“Get the toy, Philo!” I shout.
No Philo. No toy.
As I step into the dining room, I find the chew toy sitting on the floor, but Philo is all the way on the other side of the room.
“It’s right here, boy,” I say, pointing at it.
Philo paces back and forth across the floor on the far side of the dining room. He stops, sniffs under some furniture, then turns and walks back to the other side of the room, where he repeats this.
“Urrrr . . . yip-yip!” he says.
“What is it, boy?” I ask.
“Urrrr . . . yip-yip!” he repeats.
Now I really wish I could understand what Philo is saying. Things would be much easier. I could just give him what he wants and he’d be happy. And then I wouldn’t spend so much time wondering what he’s trying to say.
LUKE SHARPE is not a millionaire, but he has been trying to invent a machine that can teleport people anywhere in the world since he was eight years old. He has so far been unsuccessful but he has vowed never to give up. When he isn’t working, Luke enjoys Hawaiian pizza and skateboarding. He lives near Chicago with his wife and son (named Billy, of course), their gecko, Eddie, and their aquarium full of exotic fish.
GRAHAM ROSS has grand plans for world domination through his illustrated inventions. Right now he’s having a “ball” hanging out with Billy Sure, the next sure thing! Graham lives in a little log home in the woods with his inventive family, just outside of Merrickville, Canada.
SIMON SPOTLIGHT
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This book is a work of fiction. Any references to historical events, real people, or real places are used fictitiously. Other names, characters, places, and events are products of the author’s imagination, and any resemblance to actual events or places or persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental.
SIMON SPOTLIGHT
An imprint of Simon & Schuster Children’s Publishing Division
1230 Avenue of the Americas, New York, New York 10020
www.SimonandSchuster.com
First Simon Spotlight hardcover edition May 2015
Copyright © 2015 by Simon & Schuster, Inc. Text by David Lewman. Illustrations by Graham Ross. All rights reserved, including the right of reproduction in whole or in part in any form.
SIMON SPOTLIGHT and colophon are registered trademarks of Simon & Schuster, Inc.
For information about special discounts for bulk purchases, please contact Simon & Schuster Special Sales at 1-866-506-1949 or [email protected].
Designed by Jay Colvin
Jacket illustrated by Graham Ross
Jacket illustrations copyright © 2015 by Simon & Schuster, Inc.
The text of this book was set in Minya Nouvelle.
ISBN 978-1-4814-3951-0 (hc)
ISBN 978-1-4814-3950-3 (pbk)
ISBN 978-1-4814-3952-7 (eBook)
Library of Congress Catalog Number 2014949479
