by Gigi Pandian
My vibrant herbs were the sacrifice. They had been lovingly cared for, which gave them power. Turning the pages of Not Untrue Alchemy with shaking hands, I found a section that suggested, in coded illustrations, how to use mercury to dissolve plants without going through the usual steps that required weeks or months.
For the next two hours, I crushed and extracted the essences of the fresh herbs, working backward by beginning with fire. The resulting ashes weren’t the true salt that alchemists strive to achieve, but was none-the-less salt. Of the three essential ingredients of alchemy, mercury is the spirit, sulfur the soul, and salt the body. Salt was what I needed to save Dorian’s deteriorating body.
I didn’t know if this strangely transformed salt should be ingested or topically applied, so I tried both. While I dissolved the salt in a tea-like decoction, I also made a paste to cover Dorian’s skin. The gargoyle eyed the gooey paste skeptically, so we tried the tea first.
At nearly the stroke of midnight, the stone pieces of Dorian’s body began to shimmer. His stone leg returned to gray flesh, granule by granule. He was able to move, but the skin on his leg was a lighter shade of gray than it had been. He wasn’t the gargoyle he once was.
He smiled and hopped up into my arms to give me a hug. Terribly undignified for a Frenchmen, and my back nearly gave out under the heavy weight of his stone body, but I wasn’t complaining.
“I knew, Zoe Faust, that I could count on you.”
I hugged Dorian back, happy he couldn’t see the mixed emotions flashing across my face. Though relief was at the forefront, worry was close behind. The unnatural alchemy I’d performed to stop Dorian’s deterioration was a quick fix that hadn’t fully healed Dorian. It wasn’t a real cure. There was much more I would need to do to discover the book’s secrets and stop Dorian’s body from once again becoming a stone prison.
“This isn’t a cure, you know,” I said, setting Dorian down. “There’s more work to be done.”
“You said this book is backward, and takes from other life forces?”
“There’s still a lot I don’t understand, but that appears to be the case.”
His snout quivered. “Does this mean,” he said slowly, speaking barely above a whisper, “that I am evil?”
“No,” I said, shaking my head and feeling tears well up in my eyes. “It doesn’t mean that. I don’t yet understand what brought you to life, but the gargoyle you are—the gargoyle I know—isn’t evil.”
“Someone else did not have to die to bring me to life? Only the plants?”
I hesitated. “Nobody died for this temporary fix. That much I know. As for a permanent solution… I wish I knew, Dorian. I’ll figure it out, though. I promise.”
I knew I should be happy in the present moment. Dorian was safe. But for how long?
———
The following week was a blur.
Blue was out on bail. Charges had been filed against her for the illegal things she did to change her identity, but Max thought there was a good chance she’d only get probation.
When I stopped by Blue Sky Teas, Blue greeted me with a proposition. She’d heard about what a great cook I was, and also that I was underemployed. She made me an offer to bake vegan treats for the teashop. I happily accepted on the spot, without consulting Dorian. I knew he’d love the idea of yet another excuse to experiment with recipes, plus it could be his contribution to the huge food bills I was incurring.
Nobody could believe what Sam had done. Once people heard he’d done it for his aunt, they realized it made a certain kind of sense. But when they remembered his aunt was curmudgeonly Olivia, it again made less sense. Olivia hadn’t made an appearance at the teashop, so nobody was sure how she was doing.
Brixton was more dedicated to keeping Dorian’s secret than ever, and he was enjoying the cooking lessons the gargoyle was giving him. I think he even appreciated the weeding he was doing for me. As we prepared the yard for spring planting, he peppered me with questions about plants and alchemy.
He, Veronica, and Ethan said they had given up their tunnel explorations, as well as every other type of dare they used to come up with for each other. I wasn’t sure how long that would last, but I was pleased it sounded like the kids wouldn’t get into too much trouble for a while.
Dorian was in denial that his health would again begin to deteriorate, so I was left to my own devices to decipher the book. Well, I wasn’t completely on my own. Ivan was eager to help. Although he didn’t know I was a true alchemist or that Dorian existed, he was happy to have found a fellow enthusiast of the history of alchemy. He’d been depressed after being forced into his early retirement, so he was overjoyed to have an ongoing alchemy project that would drive his passion to finish his book.
I was getting ready to return a two-foot-high stack of library books when Max Liu appeared on my doorstep.
Looking at him through the peephole, I paused with my hand on the doorknob. I pressed my forehead to the door and closed my eyes. Should I open the door? My heart beat a little quicker as I remembered his kiss. The electrifying kiss that I’d pulled away from.
He and I could never work. Rationally, I knew that. But that was my problem. I wasn’t as rational as I wanted to believe. I tried to take a sensible course of action, living on the road, staying away from attachments, and giving up alchemy after it caused me so much pain. I’d once transformed myself accidentally, becoming an accidental alchemist. Maybe, just maybe, I was finally ready to transform myself on purpose. Here in Portland, I’d found a place that made me want to stop running from myself. I didn’t know what would become of me, but I was open to the possibilities.
I took a deep breath, opened my eyes, and turned the doorknob.
“Peace offering,” Max said, holding out a bundle of fragrant jasmine green tea. In his other hand he held a canvas bag with greens poking over the top.
“Peace offering for what?”
“I was way out of line the other day,” he said. “First at your dinner party, and then in the tunnels. I was just so happy to see that you were okay—”
“I accept your apology for how you acted about my herbal remedy at the dinner party.” I took the tea and ushered him inside, giving me a second to think. “As for what happened in the tunnels, there’s no need to apologize.”
“But your boyfriend …”
I let the question hang in the air for a moment. His assumption gave me the perfect excuse, but I no longer wanted it. “I was being serious when I said he’s just a friend. Veronica has an overactive imagination. I have a friend who’s French. That’s it.”
Max was smart. I thought it best to stick to the truth. By keeping things simple, I could do that.
“I was hoping that was true. In that case, could I cook you dinner?” He held up the bag with greens poking over the side and gave me an endearing smile that hovered between confident and shy. “I’m not nearly as good a chef as you are, but I feel bad about how your dinner party ended the other night. It’s the least I can do.”
I felt warmth rise in my cheeks. “I’d like that very much.”
Max paused on our way to the kitchen. Something in the living room had caught his eye.
“What is it?” I asked. “Don’t tell me there’s something else falling apart in this house.”
“You throw me off balance, Zoe,” he said, breaking off with an embarrassed look on his face. “I mean that in a good way. It’s your gargoyle statue. I could have sworn it scowled at me as soon as I made a move for the kitchen.”
THE END
author’s note
Though this book is a work of fiction, The Accidental Alchemist is based on fascinating historical facts that were too good not to run with in fiction.
Dorian’s “father,” Jean Eugène Robert-Houdin, was a French stage magician who lived from 1805 to 1871. He’s considered the father of modern ma
gic, for donning formal attire and moving magic from the streets into theaters. The biographical information in the book is true—including the facts that Robert-Houdin was a clockmaker who stumbled across magic by accident, and that he was asked by the French government to avert a crisis in Algeria. He helped convince Algerian rebels called the Marabouts that his “magic” was more powerful than that of local Marabout elders, therefore impressing the Algerian mullah leaders and helping the French cause. Fiction takes over where Dorian enters his life; his autobiography does not include anything about bringing a stone gargoyle to life.
French architect Eugène Viollet-le-Duc (1814–1879) was a contemporary of Robert-Houdin. Viollet-le-Duc is famous for restoring Notre Dame Cathedral in Paris, not only repairing it but also bringing new life to the cathedral. It was he who added the gallery of gargoyles—technically “grotesques” or “chimeras” because they don’t serve as functional water spouts.
I took the liberty of making the two men friends and having Viollet-le-Duc give a prototype stone gargoyle to Robert-Houdin as a gift. As far as history has recorded, no such exchange took place.
Nicolas Flamel was a fourteenth-century bookseller and scrivener in Paris. He and his wife Perenelle donated large sums of money to charity, which Nicolas claimed was gold he had acquired through alchemy. The two lived exceptionally long lives for their time, and when their graves were exhumed years later, no bodies were found.
Many early scientists were alchemists who practiced their craft in secret. Isaac Newton was one such scientist who carried out alchemical experiments secretly, and it’s speculated that a nervous breakdown Newton suffered may have been caused by mercury poisoning.
———
The Accidental Alchemist is very much my “cancer book.” The month after my thirty-sixth birthday, I was diagnosed with aggressive breast cancer. The Elixir of Life was a powerful idea during that time, as was life transformation in general. For National Novel Writing Month during the year of my cancer treatments, I wrote a draft that became The Accidental Alchemist.
I’ve always loved all things mysterious, and have been fascinated by gargoyles from an early age. I run the Gargoyle Girl blog of mysterious photography (www.gargoylegirl.com) and had toyed with the idea of writing a gargoyle as a minor character in a book or a short story. When I began jotting down notes about Dorian, he refused to stay in the shadows.
The cooking thread of the book emerged because my husband and I had recently moved from a tiny apartment to a house with a large kitchen and a little bit of land in the backyard. A passionate gardener, my husband planted an organic vegetable garden. I took cooking classes, wanting to take advantage of the biggest kitchen I’d ever had, as well as the herbs and vegetables we were growing. I didn’t expect it, but I fell in love with cooking.
After my cancer diagnosis made me take charge of my health, I taught myself to cook vegan meals from scratch that were just as good as—and often better than—anything I’d eaten before. Through a combination of more classes and experimentation, I discovered tricks that transformed foods into decadent savories without using bacon. Once I’d done that, I knew I was ready to write a book involving cooking.
I hope you enjoy the transformations in The Accidental Alchemist. Recipes, like life, aren’t set in stone, so definitely try out your own variations on the recipes I’ve included here. Since this book takes place during the winter, the foods in this book are seasonal winter foods. Next time around, it’ll be springtime …
In the meantime, you can find more information, including how to get in touch with me, at www.gigipandian.com. I love hearing from readers.
recipes
Kid-Friendly Green Smoothie (Vegan)
Total prep time: Under 15 minutes
Makes 2 servings
Ingredients:
1 green apple or 1 ripe green pear (use an apple for a tart smoothie, or a pear for a sweeter one)
1 medium cucumber, peeled
½ ripe avocado, skin and pit removed
1 ½ cups frozen broccoli
Tip: For creamy sweetness, frozen broccoli works much better than fresh.
1 tsp fresh ginger, peeled (or more to taste)
1 heaping tbsp cacao nibs or unsweetened cocoa powder
Tip: If you use cocoa powder instead of cacao nibs, it will turn your green smoothie brown—similar to a chocolate milkshake.
1 heaping tbsp peanut butter or almond butter
Approx. 1½ cups of coconut water
Tip: You can find canned coconut water at health food stores, often in 11 fl. oz. cans that provide the perfect amount of liquid for this smoothie. If you can’t find coconut water, substitute water plus a little bit of added sweetener of your choice.
Optional: a few fresh mint leaves
Directions:
Chop the above ingredients roughly, then blend together in a blender. Add more or less liquid depending on how thick you’d like it.
Variations for a less sweet smoothie:
Greens substitution: a few leaves of fresh kale instead of frozen broccoli
Protein substitution: a heaping tbsp of hulled hemp seeds or 2 tbsp soaked chia seeds instead of peanut butter
Tip: Unlike hemp seeds, chia seeds expand in water and benefit from soaking. Soak 3 tbsp dry chia seeds in ¾ cup water. Let sit for 10 minutes or longer, shake or stir the mixture to avoid clumping, then store in a sealed container in the fridge for up to a week.
Liquid substitution: plain water instead of coconut water
Additions: Lots of green vegetables work well in this smoothie, such as celery, spinach, and parsley—try out your favorites.
Cherry Walnut Oatmeal Cookies (Vegan)
Total cooking time: Under 30 minutes
Makes 12 cookies
Dry ingredients:
1 cup old-fashioned oats
¾ cup unbleached all-purpose flour
¼ cup coconut sugar or brown sugar
2 tsp baking powder
1 tsp baking soda
¼ tsp sea salt
Wet ingredients:
¼ cup maple syrup
1⁄3 cup olive oil
1 ½ tsp vanilla
Mix-in ingredients:
1⁄3 cup chopped walnuts (or substitute a favorite nut)
1⁄3 cup unsweetened dried tart cherries (or substitute chocolate chips or a favorite dried fruit, such as cranberries)
Tip: Even if you’re not a fan of plain dried cherries, try them here at least once because this flavor combination brings out the best in them.
Directions:
Preheat oven to 350. In a large bowl, combine the dry ingredients. In a smaller bowl, mix the wet ingredients. Stir the combined wet ingredients into the dry ingredients. Fold in the mix-in ingredients.
Place a sheet of parchment paper on a baking sheet. Form approximately 12 cookie dough balls with your hands, and place them on the baking sheet 2 inches apart. Bake for approximately 12 minutes.
Roasted Butternut Squash
with Lemon Tahini Sauce (Vegan)
Total cooking time: A little over an hour
Makes a side dish for 4, or a light main course for 2
Note: This is a great dish to serve meat-eaters who are skeptical that hearty vegan foods exist. The creamy, flavorful tahini sauce is a crowd-pleaser.
Ingredients for squash:
1 large butternut squash
1 large white onion (or substitute a smaller yellow onion; white onions are milder)
1 tbsp olive oil
½ tsp dried rosemary
½ tsp dried sage
Salt and pepper to taste
Optional: ¼ cup raw pepitas, a.k.a shelled pumpkin seeds
Optional: paprika, for garnish
Ingredients for tahini sauce:
½ cup tahini
Tip: Tahini is a sesame seed paste. You can often find it in a jar in the peanut butter aisle or with Middle Eastern foods, but if you find it to be expensive or hard to find, you can always make your own from scratch. See www.gigipandian
.com/recipes for a recipe to make tahini from scratch.
3 tbsp fresh-squeezed lemon juice
½ cup water
¼ tsp granulated garlic (for a chunkier sauce, substitute 2 minced garlic cloves)
¼ tsp sea salt (or more to taste)
Optional: cayenne to taste
Directions:
Preheat oven to 425. Peel butternut squash and cut into ½-inch cubes, discarding the seeds. (Tip: If the squash is difficult to cut, pierce with a knife and microwave it for a minute or two to soften it.) Peel the onion and chop roughly. Toss squash and onion with olive oil, then spread out on a parchment-paper lined baking sheet. Sprinkle spices on top. Bake for approximately 40 to 50 minutes, stirring once after 20 minutes.
While the squash mixture is baking, prepare the sauce. Whisk all the sauce ingredients together, then taste to adjust for salt and spice levels.
Tip: You’ll most likely have extra sauce. It’s a versatile sauce, which also works well as a salad dressing. Pour into a lidded glass jar and it will keep in the fridge for a couple of weeks.
Tip: You can use more or less water, depending on preferred consistency, keeping in mind that the sauce will thicken in the fridge.
Optional touch for a tasty garnish: Toast ¼ cup raw pepitas in a dry skillet on medium heat for a few minutes, until they begin to pop.
Tip: Always watch toasting nuts, as they burn quickly.
To serve: Transfer squash mixture to a serving bowl, drizzle with tahini sauce, toss pepitas on top, and sprinkle with a dash of paprika.
For more recipes and tips, visit www.gigipandian.com/recipes.
