“Deck, let’s get her back to the compound. I can take care of this with some surgical glue.” His voice was all business, but I could tell her blood was affecting him as much as it was me.
Unfortunately, Shiloh saw and let out a distressed cry.
“Ouch, Daddy, ouch.”
“Brother, let’s get out of here. We lost the car, but the danger may not be over,” Booth urged us. He was vigilant and wary, and the tension in his body was palpable. I could see he was disappointed in himself for letting the rogue soldier get away.
Without letting go of Shiloh, I took Mannix’s outstretched hand and allowed him to help Shiloh and me to our feet. The adrenaline and excitement of my tackle and roll were wearing off on her, and I knew she was starting to feel the sting of the cut.
With my life in my arms, my brothers and I took off to the car park where we’d left our bikes and Darth’s truck.
30
CHARLOTTE
What on earth just happened? Those words and so many more were racing around in my head. One minute, I was having ice cream with Shiloh and laughing with her. Then the next, Darth and Deck were running full force at us while the other four men were running just as quickly towards a blue vehicle, which I had only noticed twenty minutes earlier. They seemed to be taking photos or something. I noticed a long round black object hanging slightly out the window. At first, I had been a bit concerned, but when I saw a yellow flashing light on top of the roof, I’d decided it must be one of those cameras taking photos of local areas to put on a mapping programme.
When I saw Deck running, his voice yelling at us to get down, I knew something wasn’t right. I didn’t know why but my first instinct was to protect Shiloh, but when she noticed her daddy, she jumped away from me. What shocked me the most was Darth. He tackled me to the ground, rolling so he took the brunt of the fall, then he rolled me under him to put his back in the way of whatever danger they thought was out there. When he did, I felt a sharp pain in my shoulder blade.
I lifted my hand and felt around until I felt coldness against my fingers. Pulling my hand back, I gasped when I saw blood. Oh, great. Tears sprang to my eyes instantly. I wasn’t much of a pain person. Sure, my feet hurt with dancing and my muscles could ache something fierce from a performance, but the pain associated with blood—that I wasn’t so good with.
But the pain in my heart hurt the most. Even after Deck could see Shiloh was okay, he never acknowledged me at all. Even Darth seemed to forget me after saving me from what I had no idea. Creed, Steel, Mannix, and Booth also ignored me. Their focus was entirely on Shiloh and the cut on her arm. I hated that she got hurt. Was it my fault? Should I not have been out with Shiloh without one of the men with me? Deck was strict about her being without what he calls detail. But I’d honestly thought, after the last few weeks and me driving her to school in Deck’s truck myself, it would have been fine taking her out on a playdate to her favourite playground. I couldn’t find Deck when I wanted to leave, and I tried to find one of the other guys but only saw the prospects Squid and Seb. And they said it shouldn’t be a problem. They certainly didn’t look like they wanted to come, so I didn’t bother asking. Judging by Deck’s reaction, I probably should have.
I swiped at the tears that had escaped without me realising and huffed out a breath. Now what? Did I walk back to the compound? All my stuff was there since I lived with Deck. My horrible little apartment was gone, and the furniture I had was in storage in a shed on the club’s grounds.
I had no idea what to do.
The late afternoon cold breeze was coming in, and my shivering was telling me my lightweight dress and sandals weren’t going to cut it much longer sitting out here. My cardigan was somewhere over near the playground under a tree. Seeing that as my next step, I climbed to my feet from the ground, and suddenly, a blinding pain ripped through my leg. Reaching down, I lifted my dress to expose my thigh and saw quite a large gash there.
I burst into tears from the shock and the pain and then hobbled the few hundred yards to the big tree I had been sitting under earlier, watching Shiloh play happily.
Somehow, that felt so long ago.
Awkwardly, I fell on my butt. My leg was throbbing, as was my shoulder, and I wasn’t sure if I could move anymore. I knew now that I had sat down, getting up was going to be a huge struggle.
Oh, no, the recital! The thought suddenly popped into my head. Would I be able to dance? Would there be a recital at all? If Deck didn’t want me anymore, how could I stay here now? The apartment I had may have been horrible, but it was cheap, and it took me ages to find. Most of the places around there I wouldn’t be able to afford.
Argh, what was I doing? Giving up without a fight? This was so like me, assuming I’d done something wrong. And if I had, putting Shiloh in danger certainly wasn’t on purpose. That little girl was my world, and I would always do everything in my power to keep her safe. And if Deck doubted it… I pulled in an unsteady breath because just the thought of him not trusting me left me feeling sick to my stomach. How could he not trust me? Hadn’t I showed him all the trust in the world?
I mean, I’d moved in with him only weeks after we starting being an ‘us.’ I handed over my virginity to him, and in some ways, my submission. Not in the BDSM kind of submission, but I trusted Deck to know how to take care of me—and my heart. His overprotective and slightly controlling ways suited me. It might not have been every woman’s taste, but I liked being taken care of completely. After years of no love from my family, I liked that this hunk of a man saw it as his job to look after me.
I loved the feeling of being wrapped in his strong arms all night, his weight on me, trapping me like he couldn’t let me go. Like he needed me, and without me, he couldn’t sleep.
I loved being picked up over his shoulder and slapped on my butt as he hurried to our room because he couldn’t wait another second to be alone with me. I loved when he picked me up, put me in his ridiculously huge truck, and buckled me in, making sure I was safe. He was always making sure of that, and I let him. I trusted him to do it. I had given him that because I knew it was what he wanted. Now it was his turn to trust me to do the same for him and Shiloh.
I wasn’t going to run this time, quite literally. I grimaced as I looked down at my leg. The blood’s flow had congealed a bit, but the throbbing was still there.
Last time I didn’t trust Deck enough to let him help me, I ended up on the stage at Gypsies. Not my finest decision but Deck fixed it. So this time, I was going to fix it.
I really needed to think about getting myself up off the cold ground. The grass was growing damp from the night air, and goose bumps were appearing everywhere on my skin.
But I was not ready to haul myself up, pull on my big girl panties, and adult just yet.
At the moment, I just wanted to sit there—mostly because I had no choice—and have just a teensy tiny pity party for one.
31
DECK
I couldn’t let go of Shiloh once we got back to the car park, so I grabbed her harness and helmet out of Darth’s truck. I needed to keep her close for a while more. Once we arrived back at the compound, Darth immediately got out his medic kit and went about cleaning up her wound. He determined it to be superficial, and he used the special glue most doctors used on children instead of suturing. I could see how much he hated having to doctor her. Yeah, he had done it many times before with scraped knees, splinters, and so forth. We all had. But fixing something that was caused by a really dangerous situation? We all need a strong drink to get over this, I thought.
I was sitting on the end of her bed, holding her little hand while trying to reassure myself that she was okay, not hurt too badly, or not affected by what had gone down in the park.
Fuck me. My daughter had literally been in the sights of a madman.
That pissed me off. And scared the fucking shit out of me.
Another thought entered my head that also pissed me off. I knew I was going to have to bri
ng my prick-faced brother in on it. Jason had police contacts at his disposal, and the club had a
clean nose with the local cops. And we aimed to keep it that way.
Ford could tap into the local council’s street cameras without too much problem, but the official police ones, we wanted to go about that in the right way. And I knew, even though Jason and I had major issues between us, his love and dedication to Shiloh were without limits.
“Daddy,” Shiloh whispered. Her voice was groggy and soft. Darth had given her some children’s Panadol to help ease the stinging in her arm.
I reached out with my free hand and rubbed it over her soft hair. Every touch calmed me. “Hey, baby girl. Daddy’s here, honey. Go back to sleep.” I kept my voice low and quiet.
“Is you mad at me, Daddy?” she asked, tears filling her eyes.
“No. No, no, Shiloh, I’m not mad, baby. Daddy was scared and worried about you. So were all your uncles.” I was quick to reassure her. I swiped my thumb over her cheeks and wiped away her tears.
“But you looked mad, and you used your loud, growling voice.”
God, this kid. She had my heart so choked up with love for her. “Yes, baby, I used my growling voice, but only because I was so scared for you.”
Shiloh studied my face for a second. I could see her three-year-old brain mulling it over.
“Okays, Daddy. Can you get Char for me? I needs to hug her.”
My head started spinning. Jesus fucking Christ. Charlie! I’d fucking left her at the fucking park. I quickly looked at my watch to see it had been over an hour since we’d gotten back. Has she been out there all this time? Of course, she has, you fucking dickhead. You left her there all alone.
I pulled out my phone and shot a text to Darth.
DECK: I need Vegas in here with Shiloh. I fucking left Charlie at the park.
It didn’t take more than forty seconds for him to reply.
DARTH: Charlotte just walked in the door. She is hurt. Vegas is on her way. How the fuck did we forget about her??
Fuck if I knew. But I didn’t bother texting it back to him. Hang on! I looked back at his message and read it again. Charlie was hurt? How? I didn’t hear a shot or anything like that.
I wasn’t willing to leave Shiloh in there alone, so I had to wait it out until Vegas made it to my room.
I heard footsteps just outside the door and then a knock. I turned to see Vegas standing in the doorway, a look of concern and disappointment gracing her stunning face. I couldn’t blame her. I was disappointed in myself. Real fucking disappointed. Hurting Charlie in this way was going to cost me, and I just hoped the cost was some grovelling and not losing her.
I turned back to Shiloh, then leaned in and kissed her soft cheek. “Daddy is going to go get Charlie for you, baby. But I want you to sleep while I am gone. Vegas is here to sit with you until I get back. Okay?”
Just mentioning Charlie put the biggest smile on my girl’s face. Well, one of my girls was smiling. Now I hoped I could do the same for my other girl after the big fuck-up of leaving her all alone at the park and not even talking to her after the incident. Yeah, I was screwed.
Moving past Vegas, I gave her arm a gentle squeeze. “I will fix it,” I told her, knowing that was what had her disappointed in me.
“You better. Darth has already had a mouthful from me. Stella is ripping into Booth and Creed, Mia is trying to be mad at Steel, but his leg is giving him trouble, and I’m sure if Rainn knew and was here, Mannix would have very sore balls,” she angrily whispered to me, making sure to keep her voice low so Shiloh couldn’t hear.
Christ, the brothers were really copping it.
Feeling brave, I leaned in and kissed her forehead.
“Thank you, Julie,” I said, using her real name.
Some of the heat left her eyes, and she gave me a tiny smile. “Yeah, well, you make sure those prospects pay for letting Charlotte and Squirt leave the compound without a detail. It is their fault more than it is hers.” She gave my chest a pat and walked into the room. Her smile was gentle as she took in my sleeping princess.
As I walked briskly down the hall, I had to agree with Julie on everything she’d said. The prospects definitely knew the rules and had a lot of explaining.
I hoped my knees were feeling better because I was about to get down on them and stay on them until my sweetness forgave me.
32
CHARLOTTE
Walking into the club’s main room, I was met with the shocked and horrified expressions of ten people—ten sets of eyes but none of them the stunning blue ones I loved so much.
“Oh, my gosh, Charlotte. You’re hurt,” Mia cried, running towards me. She grabbed the nearest dining chair as she came near and gently pushed me down onto it. Since she didn’t know my shoulder was hurt too, I cried out in pain when she put pressure on it to get me to sit. “Oh, Lord, Charlotte, what happened to you? Were you attacked? You’re bleeding. Darth, get your medic kit.” Mia was talking a mile a minute. I wasn’t sure, but I didn’t think she wanted me to answer.
I looked over at Darth and saw he was on his phone texting. Booth and the others were looking at me with so much concern that it made tears well in my eyes.
The walk here had been hard, and I was so tired. Luckily, it was dark, so no one saw me limping and bleeding, but also, no one stopped to ask if I wanted any help.
I just wanted to see Shiloh and make sure she was okay. And I wanted to see Deck and give him a chance to explain what the hell this was all about. Then I would go from there.
Suddenly, heavy footsteps were coming from the hallway where the bedrooms were, and bursting into the room was Deck. He looked so distraught and, I thought, guilty. Good, so he should. I couldn’t stop the thought. I knew I was going to stay with him if he wanted me to, but I was going to make him pay for hurting me. And I might just string it out for a while.
“Sweetness,” Deck shouted, rushing to me.
God, I loved it when he called me that. Okay, then, it might not be as strung out as I’d first planned.
Then he was on me. Well, on his knees in front of me.
“Jesus, Sweetness, you’re hurt.” His voice sounded pained. He ran his hands up my thigh to the gash now well and truly bleeding again from the pressure of walking here and putting weight on it.
My hands had a mind of their own as they reached out and caressed his impossibly short hair. Touching him brought a sense of rightness.
Deck turned his head and pressed a few hungry kisses to my palm. “Charlie, I am so sorry.”
I heard the genuineness in his words, the anguish in his tone. Deck was first and foremost a protector. His daughter, his club, me. I knew this would cause him to be hard on himself, harder than he probably needed to be, but I needed to focus on everything in front of me before I helped ease his guilt.
“Shiloh? Is Shiloh okay? Is she here?” I asked frantically as I thought of my sweet, little girl
Deck nodded his head quickly. “She’s fine. A tiny little cut on her forearm. Darth glued it shut, and now she is sleeping with some help from Panadol. Vegas is with her, but she was asking for a hug from you just before I left the room to come to you.” He paused to laugh. “She told me off good and proper for using my growling voice when we saw you,” he admitted ruefully.
“You left me there, Deck. You didn’t even look my way, at all. You just took Shiloh and left. All of you did.” My eyes left his face to look at the others. They looked just as shattered as Deck did. It wasn’t about blaming anyone or making them feel like dog poo, but I had a right to know why they’d overlooked me and left.
Deck dropped his head to my lap. His arms were now holding me tight around the waist. I could feel his fingers digging into my flesh. “Please, forgive me, baby, please,” he begged, his voice slightly muffled by my lap.
“Did you not trust me with Shiloh?” I asked hesitantly. His head whipped up quickly, and the look on his face was horrified from what I had asked.
/> “Not trust you? Sweetness, other than the five men standing behind me, there is no one I trust more with my daughter than you,” he whispered vehemently.
“Then why did you leave me?” I implored him.
Deck shook his head, and precious seconds ticked by as he thought. Finally, he looked up at me, and I was totally shocked to see tears welling in his eyes.
“When Zoe was pregnant, I never really took a proper interest in the pregnancy. Jason and I were at war with each other, and I thought it better to stay away from them. You know, give them their time. But when I laid eyes on that perfect little creature, even with all the chaos with Zoe dying and Jason’s grief, and mine…” he trailed off.
I could see him remembering that day. He shot a look over to Darth, and they shared a chin lift. I knew Darth had been with Deck the day Shiloh was born and then when she lost her mother, all on the same day. It was the reason his bond with Shiloh was so strong.
“Even with everything, I fell hard and fast in love with my little girl. I vowed right then and there that she would be more important to me than anything. Wh-when I saw she was in danger, and there was a rifle pointed at her and you…” His voice cracked while trying to get everything out. He ran his hands down his face and looked at me, really looked at me, and his eyes were pools of the deepest blue. “Sweetness, you will never know the terror I felt at that moment, the possibility of losing you or Shiloh or both of you, but I know I didn’t react well. My first reaction was one of a father. She has never had anything like this happen before. I fucking panicked, I am so sorry. Words will never be enough to make up for what I did to you. But, Charlie, you have to know how much I love you.”
I believed the anguish of his words about losing Shiloh or me. I believed he just reacted the way any father would. His very first natural instinct was to see to his child. He was human, and it was only fair I forgave him and moved on. Holding onto grudges because your ego was hurt made no sense at the end of the day. I had never doubted this man’s love for me. Ever. His pursuit of me had been swift and sure. He would never have acted like that had he had doubts.
HIS SWEETNESS Page 17
