I nodded, taking the napkin. I stared down at the address written down. Then, I decided I’d do what he said and typed the address into my phone. I still kept the napkin. Then we ate until they were both finished, and they waved at me as they left. I waved back. Then I looked down and realized I hadn't eaten all of my food yet.
Not that I still felt so hungry. I felt so damn giddy. But my stomach growled, and I winced, looking around, hoping no one heard that.
Maybe just a little bit, I thought, digging in. It’s paid for after all. It would be a waste.
I couldn’t stop smiling the entire time.
Chapter 4 - Ryan
What the hell were you thinking?
I’d been asking myself that since I handed over my address to that girl from McDonald’s.
“What exactly were you thinking?” my best friend echoed, minus the curse.
I shrugged. “There’s no guarantee she’ll even come. Maybe she’d think I was just playing with her and forget about it.”
Part of me was hoping she would do that. Though, there was a more significant part hoping she would say yes.
“Hey, little guy. Can you believe this dad of yours? He did something really silly, you know? Tell him.”
Edward just giggled where he sat beside me.
We were in my bedroom, both of us sitting on my bed. I had a large TV set up on the wall across from the bed, and we were on a video call with Chris. I’d known the guy for most of my life, and he was even Edward’s godfather. Also, one of the few people my son was still himself around. I’d already explained to him everything that had happened, and his thoughts were aligned with mine.
“I honestly don’t know why I did that,” I admitted. “I guess I’ve grown desperate now, huh?”
There was no other explanation for my behavior.
Sure. It has nothing to do with the fact that she’s legal age, and you think she’s attractive, Ryan.
I winced and pushed that voice to the back of my head. I’d been trying very hard not to think about it. Chris didn’t miss it, of course, and he gave me a look to tell me he’d be asking about it once I had Edward out of the room.
“What do you know about her, then?” he asked.
I hummed. “Well, she did tell me a lot of stuff. A little too much. She left home because her mom couldn’t afford to send her to college, and she wanted to look for work so she could pay her own way.”
Chris nodded his head slowly. “If that’s the truth, then she’d probably not be that bad. If she’s willing to work her way through college on her own… that is, of course, if she wasn’t lying.”
“I don’t think she could have lied to me, though,” I murmured. “I mean, not that it would be impossible or anything, but just… the way she acted…”
Not to mention how sad she’d looked. The red eyes that made it clear she’d been crying.
Fuck. I was only just thinking about it, but I could have asked if she even had a place to stay since she’d moved out of her home.
Too late to think about that now, Ryan, I chided myself.
“Hey, Eddie? Isn’t it time for you to go to sleep now? You feel tired, buddy?”
Now that Chris had brought it up, I looked down at Edward. He looked at Chris, then at me, and he nodded his head slowly. I frowned. I should have been keeping an eye on him. I should have been the one to notice my little boy was getting sleepy.
“Do you want daddy to tuck you in?” I asked, sliding off the bed and picking him up. He nodded languidly with his cheek resting on my shoulder. I glanced at the screen. “Wait a minute, would you?”
Chris waved. “Goodnight, kid. I’ll come see you when I get back home, all right?”
Edward raised his head long enough to send back a wave, then I carried him out of my bedroom and over to his. His bedroom was across from mine and, when I slept, I kept both our doors slightly open, so he could find me whenever he wanted. He had a night light on his bedside table that he could easily carry, so he wouldn’t have to worry about the dark when coming to me. Other than moving him directly into my room—a move I’d been told not to give into—it was the best I could think of to ensure his comfort just in case he had a nightmare and it woke him up.
I carried my son over to his bed, crouching down to pull back the covers before laying him down with his head on the pillow.
“Goodnight, Eddie,” I whispered as I tucked the covers around him. I ruffled his hair gently, and he smiled sleepily up at me.
“’Night, daddy,” he whispered.
I smiled back, leaving him with a peck on his forehead. I might have lost my wife in one of the worst ways possible, but I still considered myself pretty lucky to have my little boy with me.
I left his room with the door just slightly open. I went over to my room, then moved to sit on the bed. Chris was still there on the TV, and I sighed.
“Before you start, Chris, I wasn’t thinking anything when I offered a job to that girl. I just figured she needed one.”
He arched an eyebrow at me, the look so condescending, I wished he was really in front of me so I could give him a smack on the back of the head.
“So, if I asked if this girl was attractive…”
“She was also eighteen, you jackass.”
He shrugged. “So what? She’s legal age, Ryan. There’s nothing wrong with thinking she’s attractive.”
“You know that isn’t what I’m looking for anyway,” I said with a scoff.
Even though I had to admit, that even as distraught as she’d looked, Lexi really was pretty.
“You could have at least told her a little of what you wanted from her, you know. What happens if she says no?”
I frowned to myself. The possibility had occurred to me, I just didn’t want to think too much about it, because it was the last thing I wanted.
“I don’t know what I’m going to do about it, but all the other surrogates have failed, Chris. I wasn’t joking when I said I was desperate.”
I needed one, and soon. I’d met plenty of women already, all of them willing. But either I found fault with them, or my son didn’t like them. He might not know exactly what I was meeting the women for, but I was getting my son’s input on this. Because whether or not this woman would be in our lives in the future, her genes would be.
“Maybe I really should wait on this,” I muttered.
Chris sighed. “That was what I said about it, remember? You have your hands full with Edward right now, don’t you? Are you sure you can handle a baby in the house?”
“There’s no way to know unless it happens,” I pointed out. “And, it’s not like I’m doing all this for no reason at all. You know how much Edward wants a sibling right now. How can I refuse him?”
Already, he’d had his mother taken away from him, and, of all the things he could have asked of me, a little brother or little sister was it. Maybe it was spoiling him, but I wanted Edward to have what he wanted if it would make him happy. It made me a little sad to think he’d have to forget about his mom, but there was nothing I could do about it.
“And do you think this girl would be the right woman for this?”
Any other person, I would have shrugged it off. But, with Lexi… I wasn’t sure what it was exactly, but I liked her, even though I knew nothing about her. I hadn't offered her the job just because I’d felt sorry for her, after all. And, if she decided in the end that she didn’t want it, I would look for another job for her.
“She’s pretty,” I said, looking up at Chris. “After how cold she was at first, she just talked and talked. A little too much, but I guess I thought it was cute.” I had a serious look on my face, and Chris mirrored my expression back to me.
“You do realize, that just because she’d be the mother—if she even agrees—personal traits probably don’t carry over?”
I snorted. “I’m not stupid, you know. But a child of mine is going to have half my genes and half someone else’s. I at least have the right to like the oth
er half of those genes, Chris.”
He held his hands up in mock surrender. “I didn’t say anything at all. You can do whatever you want, Ryan, you know that. I just hope you’ve thought the whole thing through. I worry about your fool head when I’m not there to help you in case you fuck up.”
I laughed. “When was the last time I ever fucked up, huh? Isn’t that usually you?”
I had been the married one, after all, for a few years, and I’d loved playing the good husband and father to my son. Chris still very much lived the life of a bachelor. I had never, not once, envied him that. Even after I lost Kora.
“I… do think she’s perfect for the option of my surrogate,” I said honestly. “Now… it’s just getting her to agree that I’m worried about.”
Because I might be questioning my sanity for deciding to do this in the first place, but never once had I regretted handing that girl my address. I could do a check on her before we signed anything, but I wanted it to be her.
Chapter 5 - Lexi
I walked up to the big, thick black door. A maid dressed in a black uniform opened the door. My first thought was to wonder how she knew I was coming to the house. Did they make her stand there to stop someone from ringing the doorbell?
“I heard the car, my dear. My name’s Grace,” she replied as if she had read my thoughts.
“Come inside, or are you going to stand out there all day? We don’t bite in here...” She ushered me inside. I held my backpack loosely as I crossed the threshold. The driver, who failed to introduce himself or even speak with me except to give me orders in and out of the car, said he would bring the rest of my things up later.
Manners and wealth don’t seem to mix with working for the wealthy, were the thoughts that were running through my mind until I met Grace. I saw her rosy cheeks and smile, and I knew we would get along, I was right.
“So, are you here for a while? I’ve not had a pretty young thing like you in the house, not for a long time. Only one little boy and a big one,” she whispered in my ear after she shut the door. “Don’t tell anyone I said that.”
I nodded in response. After all, just who would I tell?
“As I said, we don’t bite...” Grace said.
I started to go pale. I caught a glimpse of my face as she continued her grand tour of the house. My hands started to get sweaty, and I was breathing rapidly, considering we were walking at a slow pace as we went from room to room. The house was so beautiful. The crystal chandeliers hung from a vaulted ceiling in the entryway. The walls were decorated with a warm cream color that looked as if they had just been painted, for there were no smudges or marks on them. I glanced down at my wrinkled t-shirt and skin-tight jeans. There was the beginning of a hole in my right knee, and the bottom was frayed, but these were the most decent clothes I had in my collection, besides my work clothes. Now, here in this mansion, I felt dirty and messy compared to everything.
As I stood here with the maid, I felt self-conscious about everything that was on me and about me. From my hair, which I’d managed to swoop up into a loose ponytail, my new trademark look, to my glasses which were slightly askew and slanted to the left of my face because the hinge was broken.
For the first time in a long time, I just felt cheap.
As if Grace could sense my nerves, she suddenly grinned. “I love your t-shirt. It’s funny. Life is too short. Turn around; what does the back say?”
“So stop wasting it! I love it, too,” I said as I quickly spun around. My nerves settled by her friendliness.
“Let me give you the grand tour,” she said as she wrapped her arm around mine.
We glided past the stairs, and I listened as she explained the different parts of the house. I could not get over how immaculate the walls were, and I noticed there were more paintings than photos of the family until we reached the stairwell. Then, at the top was one of him—the most good-looking man I have ever laid my eyes on. I tilted my head to the side captivated by his green eyes.
“Yes, that is the handsome Mr. Gold. You’ll get to meet him tomorrow. He’s traveling back from China at the moment.”
“China? Wow!”
“Yes, he has business connections everywhere. You name it, he’s been there. Now, this is the second floor.”
“How many floors are there?”
“Five.” She edged closer to whisper. She made me think that maybe the walls had ears because she had done it twice in the few minutes since I had met her.
“The lower ground floor belongs to Mr. Gold.”
Then she continued to walk forward.
“This is your room and where you will be staying for the next few days…” Grace continued to bore me with her rules and regulations about my eating times. I wasn’t allowed to bring food into the room. Where I should put my dirty clothes, and I should only bathe in my en-suite, but I could relieve myself in the other toilets in the house. Even the way she said ‘relieve myself’ sounded sophisticated. If she saw me squeezing out my shit as if my life depended on it, she would know it was far from posh!
A question my mind kept drifting back to—do only three people live in this house?
“Did you hear what I said?” Grace asked as my mind started to wander.
When I merely nodded, she continued.
“You have no luggage.” She ran her hand over the bed, and I looked at her.
“You’re not going to lunch, we just have it in the house, and you do not need to be so formal!”
The floors in the house were wooden. Grace told me they had them restored to their original wood. There are so many rugs, Grace warned me, very expensive rugs that lay throughout the house. She told me to be careful, to wear slippers if I had them, and if I didn’t, then she would give me a pair.
I went to the bathroom, grateful that there were towels in there that I could use. They were fluffy and emerald green. I shook my head to rid myself of confusing thoughts. The shower was in a marble bathroom and was bigger than my bedroom. I ran the shower and then took off my underwear. No, the shower was bigger than my old bedroom.
Showered and dressed, I sat at the huge maple table. Which spoon was the right one, I thought as I counted three different spoons as a bowl of steaming cream soup was placed before me.
Like a flash of lightning, Mr. Gold appeared in the room. “It’s the one on the end,” he whispered as he passed me. I smelled his aroma, and I nearly died, too nervous to look at the man that was in the painting.
I felt like he was undressing me with his eyes, for they bore deep inside of me, peeling away each layer slowly and carefully.
His son, Edward, cleared his throat, breaking the spell. I sat here nervously because every time a dish came my way, I did not know which cutlery to use.
The one room in the house that did fascinate me was the library. Mainly because the only libraries I had ever visited had been in public buildings and never in someone’s house. There were normally a few books on a shelf overtaken with DVDs. This was something very different. It had a stereo in the corner, which Grace told me was used to play only classical music. She said that all I had to do was press the on button and either Beethoven or Mozart would come pouring out from every corner of the room.
This was the first thing I did as I eagerly picked up books and read the descriptions to find out more. It was like heaven. The school library is full of books but geared to different ages. This one was full of adult books, but some of them felt like they were originals, the pages intact, but they were old and delicate. I shook my head at the idea that I could be holding the original Great Expectations. I remember reading on the net that it was worth tens of thousands. Would it be just sitting in the library for anyone to take?
“Yes, it’s original,” Mr. Gold whispered in my ear and then darted across to the other side of the room. He must be a ghost. I’ve never known anyone that could move as fast as he could. A trail of his scent lingered as he moved. I inhaled it and embraced it as I followed him.
I felt myself being drawn to him like a magnet. I tried not to let my heart miss a beat as I gazed into his bright green eyes. He wore a black suit with a matching shirt and red tie. Something that I’d never noticed before was his age.
Everyone had class in this house. I truly felt like an outsider who didn’t belong.
I drew a bit too close to his body. I realized that I was flirting as I was so close to him that I could almost taste him. I wanted him to pull back and stop the attraction that was happening between us, but instead, he gently put his arm around my waist, drawing me closer and whispered, “Glad you came.” He forced his tongue into my mouth and formally introduced himself.
I wanted to scream. This was my first kiss. The problem was he tasted as nice as I thought he would, his lips delicious. They tasted like vanilla and sweet.
Sure, I had watched movies, dreaming about what it would be like, but until you carry out the actions for real, it’s all just make believe. This felt awesome. Maybe I had been watching too many movies because the next thing I did was run my hand through his soft wavy hair.
As I did, he pulled me back. “Not now, my sweet. Not now. All things come to those who wait...” with those words, he flashed back out of the library and left me in heaven still yearning for more.
Chapter 6 - Ryan
I waited a day before deciding to start with negotiations. I’d spent that day looking at Lexi.
Having her in my house was different from catching her late at night at a McDonald’s restaurant. She’d showered and changed clothes, and her color looked slightly better. She didn’t look like she’d been crying, and she’d even tried to fix her hair up a little bit.
Maybe I should find some clothes for her, I mused to myself.
The Baby Contract: A Single Dad Romance Page 3
