I turn around and march out, slamming the hotel door as well. I fucked up, and she hates me. Fuck all this shit, we both just need time to cool down.
After I hear Slade slam the door, I hear my cell phone ringing. I exit the bathroom to see who it is.
I answer when I see Holly’s name flash across my screen.
“Hey, Holls.”
“Oh my God, girl, I heard what happened. Are you okay?”
“Yes. You sound like you feel better.” I try to change the subject.
“Who cares how I feel. Are you sure you’re okay?”
I fill her in on all of last night’s drama. She apologizes more times than I can even count about being sick and leaving early. She blames herself for not being there, but I feel better knowing she wasn’t there. She couldn’t have stopped anything, I’m just glad that she wasn’t there to get hurt as well. We say our goodbyes and I rest my hands on the counter, hanging my head as I think about Slade being here this morning.
I don’t know what was said between him and that girl who showed up at my room, but I do know that he would never cheat on me.
The thought that she showed up still pisses me off though. I look up at myself in the mirror and see my necklace that he got me for my birthday hanging around my neck. I’ve always known he feels differently about me and that he has only ever loved me. I just don’t know how much more crap I can take. I once told myself I would never change anything for a man. You can still love someone that has flaws. Hell, that’s what makes them so beautiful. That’s what makes them special. Maybe my flaw is that I’m too stubborn. I’ve actually been considering quitting Larry’s. Maybe take Courtney up on her offer of the opening her bank has right now, but not now. Oh, hell no. He is not going to control my life.
Then a thought hits me. I find myself smiling as I start to get ready for the day. The bruises on my face and the memory of my fight with Slade are not going to hold me back from doing what I want.
I have a fuck him attitude today and I’m in the mood to have a new car to go along with it. I do not want to drive the Tahoe. Just because I have come to terms with the fact that my mother is gone, doesn’t mean I feel comfortable driving her car around every day.
I text Holly and tell her to get ready for lunch and I send out a message to Missy and Courtney to see if they want to do some shopping on their lunch break.
Then I hurry to get ready and head out of the hotel room.
“Hello, ma’am.” A good-looking younger man greets me as I walk into the Acura dealership. I don’t really know what I want, this just happened to be the first dealership I spotted.
“Hello,” I say nicely.
“What can I do for you today?”
“I would like to trade in my Tahoe.”
“Well you came to the right place. What are you looking for?” he says as I follow him into his little office.
I sit down in front of his desk. “It doesn’t matter. I want black and I want it to be a two-seater.” The voice inside my head is telling me Slade will be pissed when he finds out about this. I smile and choose to ignore it.
“What price range are you looking at?” he asks, returning the nice smile.
“Doesn’t matter.”
“Doesn’t matter?” He raises an eyebrow, surprised.
“No, the price does not matter. Something sporty with two seats,” I request excitedly. I already feel better about this day. Fuck Slade and his I’m not good enough shit, and fuck his trying to control everything.
“Here are some brochures of our selections.” He hands me a handful of pamphlets and I instantly like the one that reminds me of a little spaceship. It has NSX written next to it. “I want this one.” I hold it up.
He looks up and his eyes get big. “Those run around one hundred and seventy five thousand dollars, ma’am.” Then he looks at my Tahoe parked outside.
“Don’t worry.” I wave a hand. “I’ll pay the difference,” I tell him, digging into my purse for my phone. “Will a wire transfer work?” I ask, pulling up my contacts.
He nods his head, eyes still big as half-dollars.
Not an hour after transferring the money and the salesman trying to take care of me by having my new car washed and detailed, I am on my way to pick up Holly to do some shopping, before we meet up with Courtney and Missy for a late lunch. I feel like I need to get away for a couple of days. I need to take a trip back to Tulsa and take care of the last few things left. For some reason, I just feel like it’s time. I don’t know if it was my fight with Slade or what, I just feel ready to let go. I’m tired of all this fighting and the fact that someone might be after one of us. So, I’m going to clear my life of all the baggage that I can.
With a big smile, I shift my car into third and speed down the highway.
CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR
I sit behind my desk at work as I look across the room to my open door. I haven’t done shit today except replay the words I said last night. Plus the fact that I missed half the morning doesn’t do well for me. I’m just stuck on last night and our fight this morning.
I can see where she thought my words were aimed toward her. I mean, I did tell her that her job was not important, and I should have never said that. I was just pissed and scared, but I don’t know why she doesn’t quit that job. It’s not as if I’m embarrassed of her working there. It’s just not safe. Fuck, everything she seems to do has potential to be harmful to her.
“Slade.”
I blink and see my dad standing in my office with my brother beside him.
“What?” I ask, looking down to some papers in front of me.
“I’ve been calling your name, Son, for about two minutes,” he says, crossing his arms over his chest.
“What is it?” I glance at my clock and realize I have been sitting here daydreaming since I got to work.
“What is going on with you and Sam?” he asks as he and Micah both take a seat in front of my desk.
Shit! I do not want to talk about this.
“Nothing.”
“That’s not what Holly said,” Micah responds, getting my attention.
“What did Holly say?”
He shrugs with a small smile on his face.
“What the fuck did she say?” I demand.
I ignore my father’s frown at my tone. “Just that she and Sam are out shopping in Sam’s new car.”
“What?” I bark. “What the fuck do you mean ‘new car’?” When she left, she was driving her mom’s Tahoe.
He pulls his cell out of his pocket and proceeds to mess with it for a few seconds as Dad starts to talk. “Did she leave you?”
I shake my head, trying to convince myself more than him that things between us will be okay.
“Here it is,” Micah says, leaning over to hand me his phone. “It is kick ass.”
I stand, taking his phone from his hand and look at the picture while gripping it tightly. “What the fuck?” I growl, jaw clenched. She bought a car that is smaller than her Z was. “What the fuck was she thinking?”
“Son? I have a feeling I know why you two are having problems right now.”
“You know nothing.”
He gives me a small smile. “It’s not hard to figure it out.” He chuckles and I glare at him. “I tried to control your mother at one time, too. She would push even harder. Then one day when she was six months pregnant with you, she left me. I don’t even remember what the fight was about.” He shrugs. “But it pissed her off enough to leave me.”
What? I had never heard about this. I never asked about their marriage though either. I know my parents love each other. “How did you get her back?” I might as well find out since he brought that up.
“What all men do, I begged and pleaded,” he answers like it’s obvious.
I sit there thinking about how I can get her to even listen to me. I know she is beyond pissed at me. The new car just further proves that.
“I think she’s going to leave you,” Micah says
quietly.
“What?” I try to take in a deep breath. “What makes you think that?”
“Holly said she was heading back to Tulsa for a couple of days to get some stuff situated with her dad’s house, and she’s not coming home until you leave for your business trip in a couple of days.”
I think that over. That could be a good thing. Although I want her at home with me, it could be good for her to be away from whoever wants to hurt her.
I think about that for a few moments when the second part of his statement hits me. She’s not coming back until I leave town. I don’t want her at our house by herself.
I immediately reach for my phone and dial my client’s number. Micah and Father sit there the entire time as I convince my client that I need to see him tomorrow instead of in a few days. It really doesn’t take much persuading, it’s not as if meeting me earlier will hurt his case. I hang up and dial the airlines to change my flights as they continue to sit there and stare at me.
“What?” I say, hanging up the phone.
“You’re leaving today?”
“Tonight,” I clarify. “My client has agreed to meet with me tomorrow morning. That way I will be here when she thinks I’m gone.” I stand and start to gather my stuff. “Both of you.” I look to my father first, then Micah. “Do not tell a soul that I left.”
They both swear they won’t as I lock up my office and head home to pack an overnight bag. I will be there when she gets home and I will show her exactly what I think of her trying to pull a fast one on me. She has no idea how controlling I can be, and since the only place she allows me to do that is in the bedroom, I’m going to have to up my game.
I drive my car down Highway 169 in Tulsa, Oklahoma as I get close to my father’s house. A realtor is coming over first thing in the morning, and I also have a moving company scheduled for in the morning. I am moving everything out of his place and putting it into my mother’s house. I only plan on being here for two days. I am probably going to be living off energy drinks and chips. I have already trashed this car. I have sacks of clothes scattered all over the passenger seat as well as in the trunk from shopping earlier today with Holly. I have bags of chips and Snickers’ wrappers all over the front seat and floorboard. I stopped off at the local store and picked up some shampoo, a toothbrush, and stuff like that since I didn’t want to go back to Slade’s house.
Speaking of Slade, he has tried calling me twice earlier, and both times I hit ignore. I still have nothing to say to him. I’m still pissed at the way he spoke to me. I don’t know how in the hell he found me at the hotel, but I do know he’s going to be freaking out when he finds out that I checked out and I’m not at home.
I slow down as I pull into my father’s driveway. I haven’t been here since my senior year of high school. I pull up to the front of his country style house and get out of my car, grabbing a few of my bags.
I walk up to the garage and punch in the entry code. Once the garage is up, I walk in and look at the two vehicles that still sit in the garage. I run my fingertips over his red ‘69 Chevy. It still looks as good as I remember, just a little dusty. I close the garage as I walk into the house. It looks the exact same as I walk in, very rustic, with dark hardwood floors and big area rugs placed throughout the house.
I walk downstairs to his den. It was his favorite place. His wet bar is still there with alcohol lining the back of the wall. The big brown suede couch sits in front of where the TV is mounted over the fireplace. He has all kinds of animals hanging on the walls, from deer to raccoons, and even his pet cat from when he was a kid. My dad saved everything. I have never met someone who thought that everything was sentimental like he did. Especially pets. The man would send anything to a taxidermist.
I lie down on the dusty sofa and look up. Closing my eyes I take a deep breath as the smell of his house brings back so many memories. Courtney and I watching movies down here eating ice cream and popcorn; my father coming down to check on us and ask if we needed a refill or to see if we had eaten all the ice cream. He usually watched the movie with us, too. My dad never dated anyone. If he wasn’t at work, Courtney and I were usually with him.
It’s weird how I can be in this house now without falling apart. I miss him like crazy, but I know deep in my heart that he and Mom are together. And that thought brings a smile to my face.
I let out a big sigh as I settle into the couch, getting comfortable.
“What are you talking about?” I slide Courtney a look before cramming popcorn into my mouth.
She laughs. “How can you not see it? The guy is always staring at you,” she says, sitting beside me as she reaches over to the popcorn that sits between my legs.
“So.” I shrug. “He stares at anything that has a set of boobs.”
“You should go to prom with him. I plan on going with his friend, Mason.” She tilts her head to the side in thought. “Or is his name Blake?” she questions. “Anyway, it will be fun. He’s throwing a big party at his house afterward.”
I shake my head. “We just started senior year. How do you know who you’re going to go to prom with?” I grab a handful of popcorn.
“I’m good like that,” she states, taking a sip of her Coke.
I nod my head in agreement. Courtney can get any guy she wants whenever she wants them. She just has that air about her. She is not only gorgeous, with her long legs and blonde hair, but she also has confidence. I, on the other hand, am short and a little shy in the boy department. I do however have a date next weekend with Chris. He is a new kid this year. His parents divorced over the summer. He chose to live with his dad his senior year and his father just happens to live one neighborhood over from my mother. I haven’t told Courtney yet. If she knew, she would tell me not to go, that dating the new kid would ruin my reputation. Then I would roll my eyes at her and tell her to shut up.
“What are you girls up to?” my dad asks walking into the room. I can see how my mother fell for him. He’s handsome even for an older guy, with his dark hair and dark blue eyes. I watch women stare all the time as he walks by. It always makes me giggle when he speaks to one, they hang on his every word, and he doesn’t even know it.
“We are watching a movie,” I answer with a smile on my face.
“Don’t you guys have school tomorrow? It’s Monday.” He scratches the back of his neck like he’s trying to calculate the day.
“Yep.” Courtney smiles up at him.
He turns to look at me after looking down at his watch. “Are you not going home tonight? It’s past eleven.”
“No. We had planned on staying here. Is that okay?”
He bends down, kissing me on the forehead. “Of course, princess. Just make sure to let your mother know where you are at,” he says before he pulls away and gives Courtney a hug goodnight.
I pull my cell out to text my mother and let her know we are staying but then turn it right off in case she tries to call me to tell me to come home. I don’t know why she does, she knows I’m not going to listen and my dad won’t make me go home if I don’t want to. I hear Courtney’s phone beep and I roll my eyes, thinking it’s my mother trying to get a hold of us.
She drops her phone on her lap and spins her head to face me, wide-eyed.
“What?” I say, going back to shoving popcorn in my mouth.
“You are not going on that date next weekend.”
I roll my eyes. Here it goes….
I open my eyes to the quiet dark room. That was the last time my dad ever kissed me goodnight. Courtney and I had stayed up all night fighting over my date for the following weekend. It didn’t matter, I ended up cancelling that date due to the news I received the next day.
We had slept in past first period and rushed to school. On my way, I had called my dad, telling him thanks for letting us stay over and sorry that I had missed seeing him that morning.
When I stayed with him, I always got up early enough to make him breakfast. Not that morning. I later found out that I ha
d spoken with him twenty minutes before he had his car accident. If I had known he only had twenty minutes to live, I would have told him thank you. Thank you for always being there for me. Thank you for always loving me, even when I know it was hard. He was always so kind and patient.
He would say, “Princess, I love you no matter what you do. Everyone slips up and does things that land us in trouble. It’s what we take from those mistakes that make us a better person.”
That statement makes me think of Slade. Slade and I are not perfect people, but when we are together, life seems perfect. It makes all the heartache I have felt and been through worth it because all of that led me to him.
It also makes me think about my mom and dad’s relationship. If he knew she was sorry for what she had done, then why didn’t he take her back? Why did he want them to live apart if it only left them lonely without the other? I’m glad that he had planned on moving back in with her, I just hate that it took her getting sick for that to happen, for them to resolve their impasse.
I don’t plan on leaving Slade over his outburst, but I sure as hell am going to lay down some rules.
I pull my phone out of my back pocket when it signals that I have a new text message.
Holls: Hey girl. Did you make it safely?
Me: Yes I did. I’m getting ready to take a little nap before I have to start packing stuff up.
I realized I had slept for about thirty minutes, and that is not going to be enough. It takes her a few minutes to respond.
Holls: Good. I hope you’re not mad at me, but I told Micah about you going to Tulsa. He informed me when he got off that he had told Slade. Sorry, Sam.
Shit!
Me: So, you’re saying that I should expect him any time?
He doesn’t know where my father lives but it’s not hard to look up.
Unbearable (Undescribable) Page 29
