No Place Like Rome

by Julie Moffett

  Rutgon didn’t take his gaze off of me.

  Bianca spoke. “Uno.”

  I closed my eyes.

  “Due.”

  My stomach heaved. Oh, jeez. I was going to throw up right before I got shot. Could I not die with dignity? The irony of this situation was not lost on me. I never imagined my demise would conveniently occur in a crypt where no one would even have to freaking bury me. No funeral, no wailing, no gnashing of the teeth. Just bye-bye, Lexi. The end.

  I tensed, waiting for the gunshot, the searing pain and then the nothingness.

  There was a long pause and silence. I cracked open my eyes and saw Slash lowering his arm and putting the gun on the floor. He slid it toward Rutgon.

  Bianca smiled at him. “Wise decision, Angelico.”

  Slash didn’t answer. My breath whooshed out of me in a rush. I hadn’t even realized I was holding it.

  Rutgon pointed at Basia. “You, girl. Get the gun.”

  Basia pointed at her chest. She was shaking. “Me? I don’t know how to handle a gun.”

  “Shut up. Just pick it up and hand it to me, handle first. If you try anything, I’ll kill you. Do it.”

  “Oh, God.” Trembling, Basia walked two steps, gingerly picked up the gun with two fingers and gave it to Rutgon with the handle out. He pocketed it.

  Bianca said something else to Slash in Italian. He bent down and pulled a knife out of his boot, sliding it across the floor. He then pulled another gun from the back of his waist and put that on the floor as well.

  Rutgon lowered his gun and circled behind Slash, barking an order in Italian to him. Slash slowly put his hands behind his back and Rutgon snapped some cuffs on his hands. Then Rutgon patted Slash down with military precision and then forced him to sit against the wall. Tito was the next to get cuffed. Since he didn’t get the pat down, I assumed he’d already been searched for weapons.

  Rutgon did a cursory examination of the rest of us, relieving us of our flashlights, not bothering to cuff the twins or Basia and I. Guess we didn’t look like serious threats.

  When Rutgon got to me, he put his face inches from mine and smirked. “So, you are the famous Lexi Carmichael.”

  I lifted an eyebrow. “I’m famous?”

  “In certain circles.” He glanced over at the twins. “So are they. I can’t believe I’m meeting you guys at the same time. Although you and I could have met a little earlier if I’d been quicker with the umbrella.”

  “That was you?”

  “Didn’t recognize me? We could share some cool stories, you know.”

  I shrugged. “I doubt it. You’re not in our league.”

  He blinked in surprise. “What did you say?”

  “I’m pretty sure there’s nothing wrong with your hearing.”

  His face turned red. “You can’t talk to me like that. I fucking hacked into the Vatican Bank.” The back of his hand caught my right-side jaw and lip.

  Everyone started yelling and Slash struggled to get to his feet. Bianca shouted for us to freeze and then said something angrily to Rutgon in Italian. He didn’t answer. His focus and fury was on me alone.

  I straightened, meeting Rutgon’s eyes. “You didn’t hack, James. You planted a gateway program. I could have done that in the first grade. You’re a wanna-be. Sorry, dude, you can hit me again, but that’s a fact.”

  I braced myself for another hit, but Bianca snapped something at him. He ground his teeth and began to pat me down, a bit roughly. I glanced over at Slash and he gave me a warning shake of his head.

  Rutgon found the lump in my front right jean’s pocket and pulled out the small bottle of perfume. He examined and then sniffed it with disbelief. He coughed twice.

  “What the hell is this?”

  “Perfume. It was a present.”

  He wrinkled his nose and shoved it back at me. “Spray some on yourself.”

  “What?”

  “I want to make sure it’s perfume. Spray it on.”

  I popped up the lid and sprayed as little as I could on my wrist. In seconds the entire cave reeked like Nonna’s perfume.

  Rutgon held his nose. “Jesus, someone must really hate you to give you that as a present. Put it away.”

  I stuffed it in my pocket and took a step back.

  Rutgon glanced over at Bianca. “Let’s get what we came for and get the hell out of here.”

  Slash tipped his head toward Rutgon. “Why are you in league with him, Bianca?” He spoke in English, probably on purpose, to give us a better idea of what was going on.

  She ignored him.

  I could see Slash flexing his wrists and hands behind his back while he spoke. “Have you no shame? To betray your country over ideals is bad enough, but for money and with the likes of dirt like him? I thought you knew better.”

  “Shut up, asshole,” Rutgon snapped.

  Bianca laughed. “Angelico, you don’t know anything about this situation.”

  “Si, but I do, Bianca. You’re not working for SIMSI. You’re working for Maisto.”

  The look of surprise on her face was enough to confirm that Slash had hit it on the head. Bianca was working for Maisto. But why?

  Bianca turned her back on Slash and crooked her finger at me. “Come here, geek girl.”

  Uh, oh. I approached her, wondering why in the world Slash had ever dated her. Could anyone say complete and utter sociopath?

  Her dark eyes bored into mine. “What have you found so far in this cave? Don’t lie to me. I will know.”

  I exchanged a quick glance with Slash, but his face remained impassive. Her hit came out of nowhere, catching me just above the left ear. I staggered to the side and heard a cacophony of yelling. Or it could have been the ringing in my ear.

  I pressed my hand to my ear, glaring at Bianca. I was getting pretty tired of being knocked around. What was this—Punch Lexi Day? Although, if I looked at the bright side, I suppose it was better than Kill Lexi Day.

  “I didn’t say you could look at him, girl. When I speak, you look at me. Answer my question.”

  I shrugged. “We found a cave. Actually, we found a couple of caves and this one had skeletons. Go figure. We must be in a crypt. Other than that, we were just about to call it a night.”

  She hit me again and Slash shouted something at her in Italian. My lip swelled and my mouth started bleeding. I felt a nasty headache coming on.

  Rutgon took Slash’s lantern and disappeared down the path where we’d just been. My heart thumped hard. If I remembered correctly, we’d left the key in the keyhole of the door we’d just found. Well, maybe we’d get lucky and he wouldn’t notice.

  That hope was dashed when he shouted something excitedly in Italian. A thudding noise followed and then some more shouting. Bianca motioned for Slash and Tito to get up. “Seems you forgot to mention something, girl. Angelico, Tito, you go first.”

  Slash and Tito stood by pressing their backs against the wall and pushing themselves up. They followed after Rutgon and we filed after them with Bianca bringing up the rear with the gun.

  Elvis leaned forward. “You okay?”

  “Yeah, I’ll live. For now.”

  The stone door we’d been about to open before their untimely arrival, stood slightly ajar, the key still in the hole. Rutgon was already inside. I stepped inside, the musty smell hitting me like a fist to the stomach. While the other caverns appeared to have access to at least limited fresh air, this one clearly had been sealed tight.

  Once inside, I tried to ignore the smell and looked around in wonder. The cave was as large as the one we’d just been in, but the centerpiece completely floored me.

  I didn’t speak to anyone in particular. “Oh, my God. Is that a glass coffin?”

  I’d never seen anything like it
. A coffin made entirely of glass sat on an ornate raised stone dais. Even in the dim light, it was clear by the striking majesty and elegance of the structure it had to have been created by the hand of a master artist. Rutgon stood next to it, brushing the dust off.

  Elvis whistled. “Melzi’s mother?”

  “Possibly. But why so well hidden and what’s with the glass coffin?”

  Bianca filed in, still holding the gun. She gasped in surprise when she saw the coffin and then said something Rutgon. He turned and frowned at Slash and Tito. He stepped away from the coffin, pushing Slash and Tito against the wall and forcing them back into a sitting position.

  Rutgon kicked Slash’s boot once he was down. “Any time you try to move, hero, someone over here will get shot. Most likely Lexi.”

  “Hey, thanks,” I said. “That makes me feel special.”

  Rutgon ignored me, taking a third set of handcuffs from his jacket and shackling Slash’s ankle to Tito’s. He straightened and turned to Bianca. “Okay, now what?”

  Bianca considered for a moment and then pointed at me. “Go open the coffin, girl.”

  I held up my hand. “Not that we’re into social niceties and all, but I do have a name, you know.”

  “Go open that coffin or I’ll start shooting.”

  “Well, if you put it like that.” Guess she sucked at conversation more than I did. I calculated the potential usefulness of continuing the conversation and antagonizing her, but didn’t see a reason to do so. Yet. Besides, deep down, I really wanted to see what was there.

  Slash’s lantern sat on the floor, so I picked it up and examined the spot on the coffin that Rutgon had already dusted off. The glass was old and leaded in spots, so it was hard to get a good view of what was inside. However, I was certain of one thing.

  “There isn’t a body in here. At least not a skeleton.”

  “Ashes?” The question came from Elvis.

  I peered into the coffin again, carefully brushing more dust away. “It’s hard to tell in this light and with the quality of the glass. But why put ashes in a coffin? Why not an urn?”

  “Do you see anything else?” Bianca spoke. “A scroll or writings of some kind?”

  I turned around to face her. “You expecting something?”

  “Just look.”

  I turned back around, carefully dusting off a wider area. In the middle of the coffin, I spied what looked to be a small blob. “Well, there’s definitely something in here. But what I don’t know.”

  Bianca said something to Rutgon and he joined me at the coffin. He frowned when I pointed to the dark spot. “There. The light is blocked. There’s something there.”

  Bianca couldn’t hide her excitement. “Give it to me.”

  Slash said something in an angry stream of Italian. Bianca snarled something at him. Rutgon suddenly grabbed me, pushing the gun into the side of my neck. My breath froze as he increased the pressure of the cold steel against my skin.

  Bianca’s voice was chilly, controlled. “I told Angelico that if he speaks again, I’ll kill you. I don’t care if the coffin is booby-trapped. I’ve got plenty of volunteers here. Either open the damn coffin or die.”

  Rutgon released me, pushing me hard toward the coffin. I stumbled, but caught myself. I looked over my shoulder as he took several steps back.

  “Wait.” Elvis held up a hand. “Let me do it. I took a year of historical archeology. Whatever is in there, I’ll need to be careful with it so I don’t destroy it before we can see what it is.”

  Bianca thought for a moment. “Okay. You can help her.”

  “I’d rather do it myself.”

  “I don’t care what you want. Help her or shut up.”

  Elvis joined me at the dais. I’d never been so grateful to have someone at my side. “Okay, what next?” I asked him.

  He took the lantern from me, examining the lip of the lid. He ran his finger along the crease. “The coffin is sealed.”

  I knelt beside him. “With what?”

  “Wax, I think.”

  He rubbed his finger and thumb together, then smelled it. “A heavy protective wax. Smart. It will have sealed out moisture and air, perfectly preserving whatever is inside.”

  I walked around the coffin, running my finger along the seam. “It’s sealed around the entire lid.”

  “We’ll need something sharp to open it.”

  I looked over at Bianca. “We need Slash’s knife. We can’t open the lid without it. It’s sealed.”

  She considered. “Okay. But if you try anything...” She strode over to Basia and pressed the gun against her temple. Basia didn’t make a sound, but her face went deathly pale.

  I swallowed hard. “I’m not going to try anything.”

  Bianca nodded and Rutgon got the knife from her and handed it to me. It felt heavy in my hand. I didn’t dare look over at Basia. I took the knife and knelt down beside the coffin.

  “Do you think it’s safe?” I asked Elvis.

  He shrugged. “Hard to say. Slash could be right. It could be booby-trapped. Or there could be a poisonous gas trapped inside. Or moving the lid could trigger something to happen. Remember in Indiana Jones when he picked up the statue and the boulder was released, almost crushing him? We just don’t know.”

  Bianca snapped at us. “Stop the hell talking and get working.”

  I turned toward the coffin and whispered, “Idiot.”

  Elvis smiled as I lifted the knife. “Looks like we don’t have much of a choice in what to do.”

  “No, we don’t.”

  I pressed the knife into the wax and pulled it sideways. A glob came off on the knife, so I wiped it off and continued. Elvis and I took turns all around the coffin. I had no idea how long it took, but my knees, back and arms ached from the effort. When we reached our starting spot, we stood, stretching out our muscles.

  “Give me the knife back and try to open it.” Bianca waved her gun at me. “Now.”

  I gave Bianca the knife. Elvis and I pushed at the coffin lid, but it was too heavy and the wax probably still stuck in places. We grunted and pushed for a bit more, but the lid did not move an iota.

  “It’s too heavy.” I panted and wiped at my brow. “We need some help here.”

  Bianca gestured at Rutgon and he walked over to us, putting the gun in his waistband at the small of his back. He added his strength and the three of us pushed again. I felt the lid give a little, but not much. After a few more tries, Bianca ordered Basia and Xavier to help. We all took a spot along the coffin and pushed.

  After a minute of intense pushing, the lid began to slide. At that exact moment, I heard a noise behind us. From the corner of my eye, Tito and Slash pushed to their feet and in a weird sync, launched themselves at Bianca. Rutgon whirled around and took a step toward them, reaching for his gun, but Elvis neatly tripped him and he sprawled face first onto the cave floor.

  In a moment of inspiration, I threw myself on him, clawing for the gun. Elvis and Xavier joined me and we scratched and struggled in a tangle of heads and limbs. Somehow Rutgon disengaged himself from us and came to a crouch, the gun still in his hand. Tito and Slash were using the force of their bodies to knock Bianca into the wall, but without the use of their hands or feet, their effectiveness was limited. Plus Bianca fought like a tiger on PCP.

  I screamed a warning as Rutgon whirled and fired the gun. Slash slumped to the floor, taking Tito with him. I stared in horrified shock as Tito tried to get up, but Slash didn’t move.

  “You bastard.” I shrieked, then threw myself at Rutgon, clawing at his face. He pushed me hard and I fell backward into the stone dais, knocking the breath out of me.

  In the meantime, Bianca straightened, furious. She kicked Tito hard in the side with her boot over and over, shrieking at him in Italian.
Someone else was screaming, possibly me. The cave echoed with a shrieking, ear-splitting symphony. I watched as Tito curled himself up the best he could to protect himself given that his hands were handcuffed behind him and he was chained to Slash, who wasn’t moving.

  “Bianca, stop it. Stop it. Stop it!” I screamed until my voice was hoarse.

  She finally looked up at me, breathing hard. Her braid was unraveled and her cheekbone and jaw swelled on one side where the guys had knocked her into the wall. She looked severely shaken and pissed.

  She pushed her hair off her face. “That was stupid and careless, Tito. You know what happens to men who don’t fall into line with me.”

  To my horror, she held up her gun and pointed it at him. Before I could open my mouth to say another word, she pulled the trigger. And then, it was too late.

  Chapter Fifteen

  Tito twitched and lay still. Basia wailed and Xavier pulled her into his arms, holding her tight as she sobbed. I looked up from the floor, frozen in shock and disbelief. The gunshot still rang in my ears.

  Slash was down and Bianca had shot Tito. Had the world turned completely upside down?

  I struggled for words. “You...you shot him point-blank.”

  She looked at me with contemptuous eyes. “You doubted I would?”

  “He kissed your knuckles.”

  “What?”

  Rutgon growled something in Italian. Bianca waved him off. He turned to me, his expression murderous. My nails had raked down both sides of his face and it was bleeding. I felt a vicious sense of satisfaction. He looked like he wanted to shoot me, but Bianca stopped him.

  “Not now. We need her.” She waved the gun at me. “Get up and finish opening that coffin. Believe me, girl, you are next on my list to die if any of any of you try something stupid like that again.”

  I had the strangest mixture of emotions. I wanted to execute the perfect karate kick and snap the gun out of Rutgon’s hand before shooting him, like he had shot Slash. I also wanted to curl up and cry, but I looked over at Basia, Xavier and Elvis and knew I had to help them. It took me a few seconds to get my brain functioning, but I got to my feet, keeping a wary eye on Rutgon who still looked like he wanted nothing more in the world than to off me.