by Jacki Renée
Holly and Melissa move to Littleton but promise to come back for the wedding at the end of March.
Tom and Max cave in and take Penelope to the pound. She begged for a baby sister. Instead, she came home with a bouncing, energetic five-pound deer head Chihuahua.
By the end of the month word about our engagement and the baby is still the hottest topic on the parent gossip hotline. And Ms. Williamson’s attitude toward me takes a turn for the worse.
I’m happy, pregnant, and about to marry the man I’m deeply in love with. Everything else is insignificant.
CHAPTER THIRTY-THREE
“Good morning, girls.” I kiss my daughters’ cheeks. “Are you excited about today?” I pour a glass of milk.
“Where’s Daddy?” Emma asks.
“It's bad luck for the groom to see the bride before the wedding.” Even as the words leave my mouth, I hope the superstition isn’t true.
Jessica snorts.
Bryan snuck out of the house two hours ago after a few hours of pre-wedding sex. He crept into the house because I kept sexting him during his bachelor party.
“You slept in this morning. How are you feeling?” Marie fails to hide her knowing smile.
“I feel good.”
Jessica smirks. “I bet you do.”
“Are you nervous?” Mom has a smirk on her face too.
Did everyone hear us?
“A little. I just want everything to be perfect.”
“Mommy, how does a baby get in your tummy?” Emma asks.
We’ve been expecting this question, but now is not the time to answer it.
“If you two are finished eating, let’s get you ready for the ceremonies,” Mom says.
Thank you, I mouth.
“I’ll help,” Marie snickers.
They lead the girls out of the kitchen.
“It’s a good thing Mom took them from the table. I was going to tell them the baby got in there because of the noises coming from your bedroom every night.” Jessi’s hand hits the table.
“I’m sorry, I can’t help it. I crave him more than food. Is that normal?”
She nods.
“Will it stop?” I ask.
“My brother isn’t complaining.”
I giggle.
The doorbell rings. I bite into a muffin as I walk down the hallway to open the door.
Jailynne and her assistants are here to get us dressed.
She made a champagne-colored dress that accentuates my plump breasts and flows down just below my knees. She also made the girls’ sage-colored classic dresses.
The hair stylist straightens, then curls my hair, pulling pieces off my face, but leaving the back long and flowing with loose curls. I decided against a veil.
He gives the girls bouncy barrel curls, adding a headband that matches their dresses. Kourtney sits still for him.
Jessica, my bridesmaid, is dressed in a simple sage-colored dress. Her shoulder-length brown hair is curled and fluffed to appear fuller. Bryan and I bought her a tennis bracelet to wear today.
Marie is standing in as the Mother of the Bride. She cried when I asked her to take on the role. With Jailynne’s help, I designed her sage-colored dress with matching jacket and she looks beautiful. Her long more-salt-than-pepper hair is swept up off her face. Bryan and I bought her an antique brooch to wear today.
Jailynne also helped me design the Mother of the Groom dress. When Mom came for her first fitting I tried to keep a straight face. No matter how many times I altered the design, my mind kept replaying the morning I heard the tapping sound coming from the guest room. The dress is a little more youthful than she normally wears, but Mom looks hot. Her bob-cut brown hair is layered to look trendy. Bryan and I bought her an antique gold locket to wear today.
Pascual and Joshua keep our makeup natural and fresh. Since today is a special day, I allow the girls to wear a light tinted lip gloss.
Max, my Male of Honor, arrives wearing his tailored sage-colored three-piece suit and navy blue tie.
Before leaving the house, I’m given the traditional tokens for a bride on her wedding day.
Marie gives me something old. The lace handkerchief she carried on her wedding day. “I want you to keep it and give it to the girls.” She wipes tears from her eyes.
Jessica gives me something new. A shiny piece of silver to wear in my left shoe, she calls it sixpence. It’s engraved with my new initials.
Mom lets me borrow the small Fleming family’s gold cross that for seven generations, each bride held in her right hand on her wedding day. “My mother let me borrow it the day I married Bryan. Her mother let her borrow it the day she married my dad. When it’s their time the girls will borrow it on their wedding day too.” She wipes tears from her eyes.
Max gives me something blue. Blue diamond earrings the same color as the navy blue garter I’m wearing.
The limo arrives at two. We get in for our journey to the courthouse. Kourtney and Emma look out the window, playing the out of state license plate game. Mom and Marie discuss the girls’ visit to Colorado Springs next month. Jessica and Max are reminiscing about last weekend’s bachelorette party. I stare out the window at nothing in particular, but I’m thinking a lot.
I can’t remember ever being this happy. James said all the right things, did all the right things, but sometimes, it was like I was seeing two different people.
He struggled with an inner quest since he enlisted, but it in no way diminished the way I felt for him.
When we were in high school, he’d jokingly say, if I loved him, I would have sex with him. One night, it wasn’t a joke. I calmly asked, why I had to give him my most valued gift just to prove my love? I didn’t stick around to hear the answer. Instead, I kissed his cheek and told him to be safe at boot camp. I knew about the other girls and I let it go while I was in California.
Adult James held himself back and because of that, I was never in love with him. The guilt of my actions after his death is why I grieved for so long. It took some time to come to the realization that James was my friend, whom I loved, but not the love of my life, the man I wanted to call husband for the rest of my days.
The first time Bryan told me he loved me, I felt his words more than I heard them. Now I’m uplifted and wrapped in warmth. My load is light and my worries vanish every time he says those words. They give me the courage to travel this road with him today despite the past.
Bryan is the first and last to possess my soul, my life, and my body.
Closing my eyes, I bow my head.
I thank you, God, for the man I’m about to marry. I thank you for the daughter I’m about to gain, and for the father my daughter finally has in her life. Thank you for the child I’m carrying and for the family and friends who love us. I promise to cherish them and love them every day for the rest of my life. Amen.
That song by Leela James plays in my head. I heard it one time, over the holidays, but the lyrics sum up what I’m experiencing this moment of time. I fell fast and I fell hard for Bryan. And those feelings no longer frighten me. I’m ready to commit to him.
The limo turns onto the one-way street for the courthouse. My stomach flutters, or it could be the baby moving. Dad and Willis stand at the curb waiting for us. The girls are the first to climb out, followed by Mom, Jessica, and Max.
“Are you ready?” Marie holds my hand.
“I’m ready.”
She climbs out and Willis offers his hand.
He’s standing in as the Father of the Bride. And looking distinguished in his navy blue suit.
“You are a vision,” he says, kissing my cheek.
He presents his arm.
Max walks alongside me, wearing dark shades, his head moving left to right. He jokes about an escape plan if I want to leave Bryan standing at the altar.
Colorado weather is unpredictable and I’m happy it’s a beautiful day. I look to my left. Two black SUVs are parked in metered stalls. Today I will not ponder the reason. I g
lance to my right. A woman who could be Ms. Williamson’s twin sits on a bench near a flower bed of red striped, yellow tulips. The fountain is sparkling with water. The surrounding flower beds are filled with purple faces inside the pansies.
The statue in the courtyard confirms I’m on the right journey.
We enter the building and are escorted to the judge’s chambers. Max fusses with my hair and touches up my makeup. Jessica hands us our five-roses bouquet.
The doors open and Bryan’s parents walk in first, followed by Marie and Jessi, then Max and the girls.
I take a calming breath, and the last verse of that song floats through my mind as I enter the room with Willis.
The chamber is surprisingly bright, with wood bookshelves filled with law books. The American flag and the Colorado State flag are displayed on stands in the corner. Lady Justice adorns the wall behind the desk of Judge Gilbert F. Humphrey. His framed degrees hang with other certificates.
We’re not in his courtroom, but Judge Humphrey wears his judicial robe for the ceremonies.
Bryan stands in front of the desk, looking male-model good in his flawlessly tailored navy blue suit, white dress shirt, sage-and-blue patterned silk tie and matching pocket hankie, and immaculately polished black dress shoes.
Tom moves around snapping photos while a videographer captures the moment, live.
I acknowledge Holly and Melissa with a smile.
I nod to the three men standing with Bryan, also dressed in navy blue suits. Tony, Ig, and Vin are like my big brothers. I’m happy they’re in our lives.
Finally, I make it to Bryan, but Willis doesn’t let me go. His face is serious. Stern. He and Bryan lock in silent communication.
Everyone in the room grows quiet as we watch the two men hold a conversation with their eyes.
Bryan stands tall, shoulders back, chest out, towering over Willis. He nods. Willis shakes his hand, kisses my cheek and places my hand in Bryan’s, then takes his place beside Marie.
I throw Bryan a look. He turns us to face the judge. The first part of today’s ceremonies begins.
Judge Humphrey welcomes everyone and goes over his duties as a Justice of the Peace.
I hand Max my bouquet and turn to Bryan. Holding his hands, I press the cross into our palms.
Bryan recites his vows first.
“You and Kourt are a part of me. Of us. You taught me to cherish the moments given and I will not abuse them again. You and only you captured my heart in a way that makes me want the title of husband.” He takes a breath. “You are my haven and I am your protector even when it seems that I’m not. This is real. We are real. Dani, we will face each day together and I need you to remember that what we have cannot be broken. It’s going to be tested, but my love for you will not falter.” Tears pool in his eyes. “You have always been my connection. My forever and always is you.” His voice cracks. “I promise to love you, Dani, unconditionally through all of life’s journeys, even after I take my last breath.” His final words are filled with love and devotion.
He brushes the tears from my cheeks with his thumb.
We rejoin hands and I recite my vows.
“You came into my life and found a way around my defenses. It’s the little things you do to comfort me, take care of me, and protect me that made me fall in love with you. You love me without taking away my strength and independence. I can take a step back because I know you won’t let me fall. We are forever connected.” I lay our hands on my stomach and turn to look at Kourtney and Emma. “Bryan, I won’t stand behind you, but I promise to walk beside you. Every path our journey takes, I promise to travel it with you. Step for step. Fall for fall. Run for run. Fight for fight.” My voice quivers from the conviction of my words. “You can lean on me, like I lean on you. I will love you more tomorrow than I do today, and the next. I promise to love you forever and always, Bryan, even after I take my last breath.” I reach out brushing away the few tears that escape his eyes.
The unmistakable sound of sobs coming from the two people standing in as my parents make me take a stuttering breath and squeeze Bryan’s hands.
Even Tony’s rubbing his eyes.
After Bryan and I exchange rings and say “I do” we share a brief, promising kiss, then motion for the girls to come stand with us. The second phase of the ceremonies begins.
“Young lady,” the judge addresses Kourtney, “Bryan Kendall Hawk the fourth is your legal father, and your legal name is Kourtney Allison Hawk.”
“I know, your Honor.” She turns to her dad, wrapping her arms around his waist. Bryan slides a ring on the middle finger of her left hand.
“Danielle Lauren Hawk is my mommy now,” Emma shouts loud and proud before Judge Humphrey can speak.
After calming his laughter, the judge confirms her decree, and Bryan signs his name on the paperwork.
I hug my new daughter and slide a ring on the middle finger of her left hand.
“I now pronounce you Bryan, Danielle, Emma, and Kourtney Hawk,” the judge says. “Please let me be the first to congratulate you.” He shakes our hands.
“Finally,” Bryan sighs, looking down at his daughter. The importance of that single word isn’t lost on me. March twenty-eighth, two thousand fourteen, will always be remembered.
Our family and friends surround us with hugs and kisses.
We exit the judge’s chambers, walking outside. Three limousines are waiting. Bryan leads the girls and me to one while the rest of our family climbs into the others.
Our reception is at the exclusive Goldman Hotel and Resort, a hidden treasure in the community of Eldora here in Boulder County. Other friends and associates, along with Trevor, watched the ceremonies via satellite. Prince Jawad received a personal invitation from Bryan.
The wedding cake is from my favorite bakery, of course. And I surprise Bryan with a groom’s cake shaped like a hawk, a special request that the bakery’s owner was happy to oblige.
We’ll wait until after the baby is born to go on a real honeymoon, but we close ourselves off, for the weekend, in the penthouse suite before the reception ends.
CHAPTER THIRTY-FOUR
Bryan and I have been married for two happy weeks.
After school, we drive the girls and Trevor to Colorado Springs to spend spring break with Mom and Dad. Kourtney assures me I will survive a week without seeing her. She didn’t let me help her pack and says she’ll be okay without Mr. Cuddles.
With the girls gone, Bryan gives Marie and Willis the week off.
Jessica is presenting at a conference in Boston and will be back Monday afternoon.
Bryan and I take advantage of having the house to ourselves for the weekend. We get creative with a pair of Couple’s Dice that name different areas of a house for location.
We stop long enough to eat.
Monday is a light day at work. Mr. Brumfield is my only patient today. He’s rebuilding his relationship with his children.
“I’m selling the house and moving in to a seniors’ condo.”
“Can you tell me how you came to that decision, Mr. Brumfield?”
“With Agnes gone, I can no longer live there. I worked up the courage to tell my daughter the secret I’ve been carrying around for a long time.” He pulls a handkerchief out his pocket and wipes his eyes.
“Would you like to talk about the secret today?”
He nods his head, but doesn’t speak. I give him a minute to compose himself. This secret is what’s holding him back from moving on with his life.
“I loved my wife and I always came home to her. I gave Agnes her heart’s desire. Our children wanted for nothing. But I cheated. The person I met was special to me and I couldn’t just walk away. Before Agnes died, she told me she knew about the affair. She said she forgave me a long time ago.” He cries into his handkerchief.
I wait for him to let go of his pain. It’s the only way. I place a cup of water next to him.
“How long did you have this affair, Mr. Brumfie
ld?” I ask once he’s able to resume.
“Forty-five years. I’ve been with George for forty-five years.”
***
Needing to get out of the house, Bryan takes me to dinner and to see an action movie. We’re walking across the courtyard of the plaza heading to the parking lot. Bryan’s walking behind me with his hand on my small baby bump.
“Danielle.”
I stop breathing.
He steps out of the shadows, pointing a gun at us.
Everything happens in one heartbeat.
The first shot whizzes past my ear. Yanked to the left. My husband grunts. Second shot flies past my shoulder.
He’s holding on to me. We’re falling. Third shot rings in my ear. Husband grunts. I land on him. Fourth shot zooms past my ear.
Unfazed, husband rolls me off, firing consecutive shots while shielding me. Tires gripping asphalt. Blood splatters onto my face.
My hands frantically search him. He falls on me. Gun drops from his hand.
Pressure. I have to apply pressure. I roll him off me, get on my knees to shield my husband. And press on his neck.
I call out to the two men dressed in black suits running toward us and look for the gunman.
He’s gone.
One man drops to his knees next to me; the other talks into his jacket sleeve and runs past us.
“Please don’t leave me, Bryan. I love you. Please don’t leave us.”
I hear sirens in the distance.
“Keep breathing. Just concentrate on breathing,” I chant.
“Mrs. Hawk, have you been shot? Are you hurt?” the stranger asks.
I shake my head.
“She’s uninjured,” he says into his sleeve.
He checks my husband’s neck for a pulse. “Colonel. Can you hear me? Your emergency team is almost here. Hang in there, sir.”
“Secure her. Now,” my husband commands.
The sirens get closer.
I’m lifted off the ground, my hands replaced by the man who called my husband “Colonel.” I fight against the hands of the person whisking me away.
