His first instinct was hell no. But the question was in-bounds. The whole point of any of them being here was to find out what her deal was and to get her in touch with her ability. Maybe Telos was a better choice for making that happen given their weeks of failure. Whether Maddy cut him off from contact with Wallace or not, the woman needed to be in control of her magic.
Palla took stock of his state. All normal and fully fucked up, and this was one of his better days. Boo-yah. Fine, so Wallace was calming him down. That wasn’t a bad thing when he needed to seem normal. “Check it,” he told Telos. Psychically, he opened himself to the other demon and hoped he’d managed to get enough control over himself that he wasn’t in danger of getting set off again.
Telos reciprocated. Cautious to start, as he should be when he was sharing mental space with someone known to be unstable. Maddy knew better than to get in on the link. There was a lot a demon could do to a human without breaking the rules—Kynan Aijan being a master at skirting the rules. Since the demon had been here and left his handiwork behind, doubtless Maddy had personal experience with one of the kin fucking you up while coloring inside the lines.
Per usual, Wallace couldn’t tell what was going on. Without a blood link with one of the kin, she might never be able to make and sustain a connection like this, that was a possibility. The connection he had going with Telos meant now he knew the other demon didn’t intend any harm. A good thing, too, because Palla wouldn’t hesitate to thoroughly mess him up if he made even the slightest move against the two witches. Telos’s oaths to Nikodemus were in place and solid, along with a blood oath to the woman he’d hooked up with. Oh, and Telos was having full on no limits sex with the witch.
After they settled the issue of relative abilities and willingness to commit mayhem, he let Telos feel what he did where Wallace was concerned; that bizarre sense of something is off that he got from her when her magic kicked on.
Telos shot a look at Wallace. “The hell?”
“Exactly.”
“She’s doing that?” Telos said.
“What?” Wallace left the chair for the couch and sat on the opposite end from Telos. “What are you talking about?”
“You, angel.”
“Thank you so much. It’s all so clear now.” She opened herself to a connection with him. All credit to her, she was better at it than she had been the first time he’d been there when she tried. One hundred percent improvement, and she was still on the edge of giving up her stomach inside of five seconds of him bringing her in. He let go.
Wallace bent over, arms dangling between her legs. Since he was a lowlife, he wished she was in that yellow bikini. Telos, on account of being fully hooked in, shared the appreciation and the images of her by the pool, if not Palla’s lack of concern about being an asshole.
“Do it to Telos,” Palla said. “Make him feel like there’s nothing to worry about.”
With her head still between her knees, she said, “Nobody’s arguing.”
“Easy to fix.” Palla dropped out of his link. He got in Telos’s face again and popped him hard in the shoulder.
Telos shot to his feet, hands clenched. “You think I won’t take you on? Think again, asshole.”
Palla stayed in his face. “Eat shit.”
“Palla,” Maddy said sharply. “Enough.”
He gave Telos a look into the kind of mayhem he’d be happy to deal out and then, yeah, there it was. His sense of something being wrong with Wallace increased, and then came the now-familiar easing of his reaction to Telos. Through their link, he felt a similar reaction in the other demon.
Wallace couldn’t do jack shit for magic except for this, and after all this time working with her, he still had no idea how she did it. He just knew she was better at it now than she had been when they started working with her one-on-one.
He backed away from Telos, hands lifted, magic dampened. No sense pissing off Telos more than necessary. He faced the other demon. “See what I mean?”
Telos retied the ponytail of his long, dark hair and took his time answering. “Lady, that’s a seriously wacked ability you have going there.”
Wallace looked between them. “Am I supposed to say thank you?”
“If you want.” Telos shrugged. “It’s a fact.”
“Thank you, then.” Her smiles, the real ones, were part shy, part lit with joy, and always unexpectedly hot. Whatever. She wasn’t Palla’s type. He knew what he liked, and nicely put together as Wallace was, she wasn’t it. He went for flashy in his women. Though, come to think of it, she’d looked plenty flashy out at the pool.
He hadn’t cut his link with Telos soon enough because Telos gave him a shit-eating grin, and said, “Right. You just tell yourself that.”
“What?” Maddy said.
“Nothing.”
Telos laughed. “You are doomed, friend. Doomed.”
So what if Wallace was good looking? Nothing was going to happen. He wasn’t going to sleep with her because he only fucked humans who wouldn’t complicate his life. Wallace Jackson was nothing but a complication. “Anyone want a beer? Do you mind, Maddy?”
“We could use a break, I think.”
“Sure,” Telos said.
He could feel himself disassociating. When he linked with the kin the way he had with Telos, in tight like that, he always ended up worse off. Feeling the loss of Avitas like it was yesterday.
“I have Lagunitas IPA,” Maddy said to Telos. “And Bear Republic Hop Rod Rye. Any preference?”
“I’ll have the Hop Rod,” Wallace said. Palla snorted, and she returned his look. “Don’t. Okay? I am not in the mood.”
“I’m not curing your hangover later.” He pushed away from the wall where he’d been about to pound Telos into a pulp.
“Did I ask you to?”
He shifted his attention to Maddy. “That’s some serious sucking up there. Stocking Kynan Aijan’s favorite.”
Maddy’s mouth tensed. “I know you like the IPA, and I’m sure as hell not sucking up to you. Telos?”
“Lagunitas,” he said.
When Maddy came back with the beers, Telos reached for his and Wallace’s and handed hers to her like they were best friends. Palla sat across from the couch after taking one of the IPAs from Maddy. He tuned out the conversation, but if he wasn’t feeling the screaming horror of his loss, then he was fixated on Wallace and her magic. She had to learn. Had to. Had to. He was fucked if she didn’t.
She had power. He knew it like he knew his own name. She’d managed to dead drop him twice more since Maddy had started working with her like this. It wasn’t a fluke. But he needed her to be reliable. Maybe someone like Kynan should come in. That mofo would crack her right open and tell them what she was. The problem with that idea was they might never get her put together again.
“Palla?”
He looked up and died a little from the desolation of being alone. Maddy stood before him, hands on her hips. “What?”
She shook her head. “Nothing.”
He lifted his beer and found he hadn’t touched it. Alone. Alone. No one but him. Without Avitas, half of him was missing. “Why are you bothering me about nothing?”
“I’m walking Telos to the door. I need to talk with him about taking your place with Wallace.”
“You do that.”
“It doesn’t work with you two.” She let out a long breath. “You know it doesn’t.”
Fuck this shit.
“Can I trust you to behave while I’m gone?”
He leaned to one side so he could stare at Wallace. He got a rise out of her and Maddy both. “No.”
“Ten minutes. That’s all I ask.”
“I’ll try not to kill her.”
“Really, Palla.”
He stood and gathered the empties. This did not include Wallace’s Hop Rod since she wasn’t done with hers. He took the rest into the kitchen and set his untouched IPA on the counter and the empties in the recycling. He concentrated on g
etting himself straightened out. He could hear Maddy and Telos talking. Friendly but serious. Working out the details of doing extra duty with Maddy and Wallace. Maybe Telos would do better.
He put his hands on the counter and leaned over and fought—everything. Everything back to the way it was when he just didn’t care. He could deal with his. Being alone.
“Hey.”
“What?” He didn’t look up.
“Can we talk?”
“No.”
Wallace joined him at the counter and reached for his untouched Lagunitas.
“That’s mine.” He liked women in dresses. Fucking Randi loved to wear dresses. Lots of women did. Wallace never wore dresses. Besides that neon yellow bikini, he’d never seen her in anything but jeans and a tee-shirt. She wasn’t dressy the way he liked. He liked women with long hair, too, and hers was short.
“Not any more.” She took a long drink that was full of fuck you. “I’ll get you another one if you want.”
“I want mine.” He met her eyes, and that river of quiet that ran through her flipped him upside down worse than ever.
She handed him his beer, and he took a drink, too, without wiping the mouth first. “Telos said some interesting things while you were busy ignoring us.”
“Like what?”
“Like maybe I’m trying too hard.”
“Yeah?”
She shrugged. “Yeah.”
He drank more beer and handed her the bottle. “Take the rest of the day off.”
She took the beer and drank. Without wiping the mouth of the bottle. “I don’t think that’s what he meant.”
“Why are you bothering me with this?”
She shrugged and handed back his beer. “I don’t know. Because even though you hate me—”
“Angel, it’s not personal. I hate all humans.”
“Same difference.” She eyed the beer, but he kept it because he knew it would bother her. “Maddy feels bad for me every time I fail. To be honest, it’s a little wearying. You’re not just going through the motions, but you also don’t feel bad for me when nothing happens.”
“I don’t feel a thing about you.” He took a pull on his beer. “Except for not liking humans. Or witches.”
“Sure.” She met his gaze. She was brave to be looking at him like that. “But you still want me to get better.”
“Don’t get your hopes up. I swore an oath. That’s all it is.” It wasn’t, but she didn’t need to know that.
She studied him for a while, and then took the beer. Because he let her. He watched her drink and thought about yellow bikinis and then about the lack of them. They switched off with the beer again. “The reason doesn’t matter, does it?”
“So?”
“So. What if it’s not because I can’t? What if it’s because I keep trying the way everyone says to, but it doesn’t work because that’s not how I am?”
He leaned an elbow against the counter behind him. Well, shit. “Okay.”
“Most of the street witches, when their magic comes on, if it does, they either cope, go insane, or die, right?”
“That’s what I hear.”
“I didn’t go insane or die.”
He toasted her with his beer. “You’re a survivor.”
“That’s right. I coped.”
He stared at her. Really stared. Round face, but with cheekbones that made her interesting to look at. Big, dark eyes. Pretty eyes. Brown skin that looked smooth as silk. He’d do her in a minute, he really would, and since he was being replaced with Telos, he didn’t have to worry that dirty sex with her would fuck up everything else.
In a low voice, she said, “I am not like other the witches.”
“No.” He blinked a couple of times, and everything shifted. All the off about her magic fell into a different place. “You’re not.”
“I think”—She licked her lips—“I think maybe I’m like one of those optical illusions where you have to make yourself see the other image. Which way is the lady spinning? Is it two vases or one face? Some people look their whole lives and never see the other way.”
“Show me.” He put down the beer. “Show me what you mean.”
CHAPTER 6
She’d have moved away except Palla was so vivid right now she couldn’t think straight. Palla, she knew, was formidable when he decided to pay attention to you. The way he’d decided to pay attention to her now.
“Show me.” Flecks of color swirled across his eyes. She’d seen that effect dozen of times now, but it still took her aback. When his eyes were like that, he was holding power. Ready to use it, and like always, she could not feel it when any other witch would have. “Not like you’ve been doing. Do it the other way. Maddy’s not here, so you better give permission first. I don’t want questions I can’t answer later.”
She knew that. The rules were that a demon needed permission to make a psychic link with a human. Maddy had made a big deal out of all the witches understanding what was allowed and not allowed and what it meant to consent to certain acts with a demon. Like Palla.
“I need the word.”
He was right about getting her permission again. Maddy was a stickler for reconfirming consent after a break from practice. “Yes.”
Palla nodded.
“Okay, what do I do now?”
“Nothing you normally do.”
“Big help.”
He shrugged.
She abandoned the visualizations Maddy had them run through, and there was that space in her that was shaped, not formed. The emptiness that was there all the time. A void she could shape, not one that took shape. She concentrated on the container of the void in her middle, the hollowness in her middle that she’d always thought ought to hold her magic and did not. She stopped trying to find anything there and instead concentrated on where the void was not.
Awareness of Palla blossomed in the center of her chest. A supernova. Just as fast as she connected with him, she lost contact.
He sucked in breath. “What the hell did you just do?”
She trembled because she hadn’t thought it would work, that it could be so easy. She tried again and he was there, overwhelming her again.
Palla steadied her but she gripped his arm because she was shaking. Couldn’t stop shaking. Dizzy. She held on as long as she could, trying to memorize what she’d done to get here, but the steps weren’t a list you followed, there was no incantation, no rules. She didn’t trust this, why should she after all these weeks of failure, and her control slipped out of reach. Palla went from a flare of energy to the usual blank.
“Let me in.” He touched a finger to her forehead. “Let me in so I can see what you’re doing.” A lock of his black hair fell across his forehead the way hers never would unless she used chemical straighteners. It was a look she couldn’t afford on her salary.
“I don’t know how.”
He extended a hand palm up and sliced the side of his nail across the tip of his index finger. The motion was sharp and fast, but because she was watching she saw the transformation of fingernail to talon and back. Red welled from the slice he’d made. He held his hand between them.
“Blood makes a link easier and more intense, so we don’t do it with the street witches. Not at the start.” He offered his hand again. “I’m not talking about an oath. This isn’t permanent, and it’s not an indwell either. This’ll juice it a little, that’s all.”
“I’ll tell you what happens,” she said. He was pushing at her, and her nausea was starting up again. “I get sick to my stomach.”
“Not this time,” he said. “That’s not going to happen this time.” He gave her a long, dirty look and they didn’t need to be sharing any mental space to know what he meant. “Angel, my blood is going to be the best thing that ever happened to you.”
She rolled her eyes. “How does any woman resist you?
“They don’t.” His voice was rich as melted chocolate.
Her stomach did a slow flip, and that
did not make any sense, that she’d react like that. She put that out of her mind because she did not want him thinking she was hot for him. She wasn’t. You could appreciate the package a man came in without liking him.
The parts of his eyes that should have been different colors were variations of gold. Pupil, iris, sclera, and throughout were moving flecks of color; yellow and bronze, whirling, appearing, disappearing. Now and then one of the flecks glittered green or gold. He drew her close and held his blooded finger to her lips. “Make it happen, Wallace.”
She took his finger in her mouth, and his blood was warm. A sizzle spread through her, a thousand sparks.
“Go.”
She got her head around what she was doing again, the way she’d done it before, and Palla flashed alive. She recognized the sensation of him pushing in on her. She’d spent hours practicing with him, never connecting for longer than a few seconds. Those times hadn’t been like this. Nothing like this, and this time they stayed connected.
He was there in her mind, and she wasn’t sick to her stomach because he was wasn’t reaching into her head the way demons did. Instead, she was letting him in through the edges of the void inward, and he followed that path instead of the one he was used to.
Wallace blinked hard, disoriented with having him alive like this. He slid an arm around her waist, steadying her. He was in her head, and Palla was not an ocean, he was that which contained an ocean. There was no hole where her power ought to be. There was the outside of the container.
“Fuck me, Wallace.” His whisper formed in her thoughts as an idea, not conversation. Not spoken words. This was effortless, having him there. Breathtaking. Heartrending. All this time. All this time. Her power had been there all this time, and she had been looking with the wrong eyes.
“Now that I know it’s there,” he said, but not said. There was just the blossoming of his thoughts in her head. “I see the shape of your magic.”
Palla was a demon. Not human. That came home to her with a crash.
“Yeah.” He laughed. “And you are a witch.”
Dead Drop Page 4
