He nervously glanced at the closed door farther back and nibbled on his lip as his fingers twisted the button on his jacket. The poor man seemed to be quite all over the place. I wondered if it was a particularly bad day at the office with Mathis or if my husband was always a tyrant.
“I’d rather see with Mr. Grimes before I leave if you don’t mind, ma’am.’’
“I understand.’’ I reassured him with a forced smile as he led me to my husband’s office where I had half a mind tearing him apart for summoning me like he did with a quick text. I would have much rather spent the whole day stressing over seeing him after that intense kiss and get ready for his potent presence tonight. Instead, I had to rush to get ready instead of moping around and get here without my shields firmly in place and with the overwhelming memory of that kiss on the forefront of my mind.
Jonatan knocked at the door with a polite smile my way as I took off my trench coat and draped it over my arm after shouldering my purse again.
“Come in,’’ Mathis said from inside. His voice couldn’t be mistaken for a welcoming tone.
Jonatan opened the door cautiously. “ Sir, your wife is here.’’
I glanced over my husband’s assistant’s shoulder and saw Mathis at his desk, his head turned toward us while he stopped reading some kind of file in front of him. He dropped the pen he had been holding and let it roll until it stopped against the keyboard of his computer.
“Good. Come in, Lila,’’ he said, voice flat. But his eyes were a different story.
In them, I saw what I had witnessed on his face right before he kissed me, and right after too. The space separating us made it possible for me to keep on breathing while my heart seized briefly. Desire was mounting inside me as I took a step, and then another to bring me closer and closer to the desk behind which Mathis was sitting, staring at me.
His eyes took in my body, the way the high-waisted black skirt emphasized my hips, the way my light gray v-neck cashmere sweater molded my round breasts, the way my hair freely waved around my face and down my back. Nothing was left aside, not even my black high heels.
Once again, he traced his lower lip slowly, his eyes now back 0n mine. That move had first infuriated me, but it now spoke to me on a carnal level. I felt my breasts turning heavy in my bra, desire pooled low in my belly and my legs lost some of their stability.
“Do you need anything else, sir?’’ Jonatan asked and I startled at the reminder that he was still there.
I tore my eyes away from my husband’s and stared instead at the quite impressive view and fitting to a tee for a business mogul like him. I inhaled deeply as Mathis dismissed his assistant with a curt word.
The door closed after Jonatan and the atmosphere shifted again. Invoking all of my poise from years spent grooming into a woman in perfect control over herself and her emotions, I went to the chairs in front of Mathis’ desk and dropped my purse and my trench coat over the back before sitting in the other one, foregoing the easy way out that would have been to sit on the black couch in the far corner of his huge office.
“Making me come to your office for lunch is unexpected.’’ I crossed my legs and smoothed my skirt when it started riding higher, exposing my knee and the beginning of my thigh.
His eyes burned me there, sizzling my skin until flames licked upward and reached my panty line. I cleared my throat daintily when the need to fidget started at the first signs of my growing arousal.
It was humiliating to have my panties drenched when facing a man I could barely stand, my husband, when all he wanted was to play games with me until he would resume his life while I licked my wounded pride and tried to gather my shattered self-esteem.
Carter Manor hadn’t prepared me for a situation like this one.
“Even after last night?’’ he asked with a suggestive tone as his eyes fell to my cleavage without any shame, while I was ashamed of the way my skin tingled.
“What about last night?’’ I countered, my chin tilted upward as my eyes willed his to leave my cleavage for a more innocent place. I had my wish granted when they went to mine again, but this time the intensity in them knocked me sideways. He had such a powerful stare.
My hands took a hold of the hem of my cashmere sweater, my grip so tight that I would probably stretch the poor garment in no time.
“Now, who’s the one playing games, Lila?’’
“Let me rephrase then.’’ I leaned forward and was surprised when his eyes didn’t fall to my cleavage this time. They kept on fixing mine as if he was looking through my soul to find my most depraved fantasy. “I don’t want to talk about last night because it was inconsequential. I hope this time it’s clear enough for you, Mathis.’’
Like always, hearing his name coming from my mouth made him react. It wasn’t anything blatant, if I hadn’t been watching closely I would miss the signs. His shoulders moved slightly, his lips parted just a little and his eyes glazed over before he blinked and offered me his best insufferable and overconfident smirk carving that wicked dimple that had troubled my sleep last night.
“Inconsequential, you say?’’ He closed the file in front of him and set it aside, his smirk still firmly in place and his eyes not once looking away from me. He was like a predator preparing his next move, his attack. “Then, you didn’t want to come last night. You didn’t want me to fuck you in our bed like you’ve never been fucked before.’’ He put his forearms on his desk and leaned forward to better hit me with his dark eyes. I shivered. “You didn’t want to lose yourself in me while I’d do the same with you. Is that right?’’
I couldn’t look away from his eyes as his words thrilled me until I was trembling in the chair, at the mercy of a desire I didn’t want to comprehend. He had me and the bastard knew it.
His eyes didn’t miss a thing and he probably caught the desire dilating my pupils, the goosebumps breaking out all over my cleavage, or the way I kept on pressing my legs together. I didn’t remember ever being in such an aroused state without any physical touch before.
“Hmm, it looks like you don’t want to lie. That’s good,’’ he said nonchalantly. One of his hands disappeared a moment under his desk and I wondered if he adjusted his erection, if he was as affected as I was or if he was just getting off on the chase and this maddening game he had me in. “Does it mean you won’t resist any longer, Lila?’’
That got my attention and made me find my words again. I stopped stretching the sleeves of my cashmere sweater and instead gripped onto the arms of the chair. “It’s not because I wanted sex last night that it’s going to happen.’’
“Really?’’ he asked with clear disbelief in his voice and that made me want to strangle his overconfidence and slap myself for giving him the chance to doubt me. He had all the reasons to with the way I had launched myself into that kiss. “I already told you that it’s a matter of time. We both know it’s going to happen.’’
I stood up and smoothed my clothes, doing everything to find my composure again. “I don’t think you summoned me here for this. I’m sure you have a busy afternoon ahead of you so let’s eat.’’ I turned around and walked to the couch with a fake assurance and a determination to resist him and his sex appeal.
As I sat properly at one end of the couch, I watched Mathis stand, take off his jacket and finally join me on the couch. The view of his muscles tugging on his button-down had me too distracted to check the type of food he had delivered.
He was truly a handsome man exuding a sex appeal impossible to ignore. The darkness and distance in his eyes only made the attraction stronger and made my emotions more intense in every way. I reacted to him and it had started the very first time I had laid eyes on him and he hadn’t stopped playing me.
His big hands took over the task of serving the food in front of us, two turkey sandwiches wrapped in some organic deli paper and the paper napkins accompanying them.
It was hard for me to stop watching him as he rolled up his sleeves to uncover thick forear
ms and the veins leading to his powerful hands. It was hard to be close enough to him to be aware of the space he occupied, of his warmth, of his aftershave.
“When you said ‘let’s eat’, I didn’t realize you were thinking of me.’’
I blinked and frowned. “What?’’
He turned his head sideways and traced his lower lip deliberately slow, knowing full well that I would be hypnotized by this move. “You’re looking at me with hunger, little wife,’’ he said, his voice low and seductive. It was like a caress that reached under my clothes.
“I’m not. My God,’’ I muttered and focused all my attention on the sandwich in front of me, but as I started unwrapping it I didn’t feel like eating. A lead weight appeared in my stomach. “It’s not because I stare at you that I want to eat you alive.’’
“Oh no?’’ He chuckled darkly and the sound should repulse me, but instead my heart hammered in my chest.
I threw the sandwich on the coffee table. “Stop this! Why do you find this pleasure in toying with me? What is with you!’’ My voice raised crescendo, my breathing getting choppier.
His self-satisfied smirk and the dimple disappeared, but where I expected a distant mask with coldness pouring out of him, only intensity and something else shone in his dark eyes. “What is with me?’’ he asked, voice low, barely above a whisper. He turned toward me and leaned closer until his face was the only thing I could see. Until only he existed. Until he was the center of my world and I couldn’t escape him. Until I stopped breathing. “This morning I had a woman throwing herself at me right there.’’ He pointed at his desk and my eyes followed before I faced him again. My heart stopped hammering, my whole body locked down as if I was getting ready to get violently punched and hurt. It’s ridiculous. I didn’t care if he had a woman here and he slept with her. I didn’t care. I… God, why did I care? “And you know what, Lila?’’ He grabbed my chin and tilted my head upward a notch, drawing my mouth closer to his. “I. Turned. Her. Down. Because. I. Want. You.’’ The way he hammered each word made me shiver and I knew he felt it in his grip on my chin. His eyes flashed as they held mine in their grasp, enthralling me furthermore. “I only want to fuck my wife. You’re polluting my damn mind, rendering me mindless in the sexual frustration you forced on us. So now, tell me who’s really toying with whom.’’
“You’re crazy,’’ I whispered weakly, my throat dry and my limbs unresponsive when my mind screamed at me to get away. I didn’t move. I only shivered more when his thumb slowly went up, releasing my chin to trace the underside of my lower lip.
My breathing hitched audibly.
“Crazy?’’ He uttered the word in a low voice as if testing the sound of it. His eyes fell to my mouth then, right when his thumb finally traced my lower lip. That touch, light in itself was impossibly charged and sent a shock to my system, directly linked to my core. “I suppose I am. All of this is crazy anyway, Lila.’’
“Then stop,’’ I said, almost pleading for him to prevent us from going that route. I had known as soon as my lips went into contact with his last night that it would announce my downfall. I had known that I had willingly signed my own loss.
For years I had prided myself on being a strong person, but a strong person wouldn’t be unable to pull away from that man. A strong person wouldn’t feel undeniably attracted to that man. A strong person would protect themselves instead of jumping into a situation that was bound to hurt them.
I was weak.
The marriage to Mathis Grimes made me weak in just about three days. Three measly days and I was ready to toss away who I was and what I had vowed to myself.
“Oh, but I don’t want to,’’ he replied with his annoyingly sexy smirk. With his thumb he pulled my lip down, just a breadth to make me part my lips in a sigh. I felt my heartbeat in my throat, beating and beating harder still in my neck, in my temples. “I want you stripped of everything, Lila. I want your fire in my bed. I want your moans, your shivers, your skin and sweat. So no, I’m not going to stop this craziness. Not until I have all of you. I told you you’d be mine in all ways, and I intend to keep my word.’’
“Don’t,’’ I said weakly. Even to my own ears it didn’t sound very convincing and the way he leaned closer with his smirk told me he didn’t believe that word I uttered stupidly too weakly.
“You’re not pushing me away,’’ he whispered so close to my mouth I almost felt them on my lips.
His rich aftershave that fit him perfectly invaded my nostrils and pushed the world away even more out of reach. His face was the only thing I saw with each of his eyelids, the specks of gold in his dark eyes, the whiskers already growing on his fair skin… I couldn’t miss a thing even if I wanted and it was too much.
I closed my eyes.
That’s when I realized that my hands were clenched on my husband’s powerful forearms, bare now that his sleeves were rolled up to his elbows. That’s when my breathing became harsher, faster.
That’s when I whimpered, begging him to put an end to this teasing game he had me trapped in. That’s when, in that small noise, I surrendered.
My whole body was already primed for him with my drenched panties, my heaving chest, the heat going through me and the tingles coursing all over my skin. Even my breasts felt heavy and constricted in my bra and only his touch could bring me relief.
He had won.
For now, I was too lost to be mad or ashamed. All I wanted was to see if the intense sensations he had awakened in me would culminate to something far stronger than I had ever felt with a man. I needed to see if sex with Mathis would be worth the sacrifice I was making and the risk of losing myself and getting hurt.
“Do you want me to kiss you, little wife?’’ he asked, voice hoarse and a dark desire pouring out of him, basking me in lust even more.
I shivered and tightened my hands on his forearms. Any other man would already have kissed me, but he wanted me to completely surrender. I knew it, but somehow words failed me. Instead, I nodded once. Just once, but it was enough.
Eyes still closed, I first felt a light brush of lips and the rasp of his whiskers around my mouth. Then he pulled away and took with him my breath.
Heart fast beating in my chest and my hands shaking on his forearms, I listened to his own breathing accelerating while his breath caressed my face and down my neck to tease the swell of my breasts through the v-neck cashmere sweater.
He was playing with me, toying with me.
I hated him.
But I had never wanted a kiss so much in all my life.
Slowly, almost with a certain fear lingering somewhere, I blinked my eyes open. The first thing I saw was Mathis’ eyes, so dark, so enthralling. Then, I saw his mouth with his dark pink lips parted.
“There. I wanted to see those beautiful eyes full of desire,’’ he rasped. He pulled away his forearms from my hands and fisted my hair in both hands.
Once again he surprised me. Whenever I expected something from that man he found a way to keep me on my toes by choosing another way. For instance, he didn’t go straight for my lips. He tugged gently on my hair until my neck was exposed and bent forward to kiss my throat. His lips lingered on my skin trailing up to place another kiss, this time under my ear.
His fast breathing in my ear had me trembling against him. My hands found their way back to his body, this time taking a hold of his strong shoulders bulging under his button-down.
“You’re mine, Lila,’’ he whispered in my ear with clear possession audible. I had no strength to deny his statement or show any kind of annoyance. All I did was dig my fingers into his shoulders and whimper his name.
His whiskers abraded my flesh as he slowly moved from my neck to my face. I barely had the time to stare at his eyes so dark and seemingly mesmerized by my parted lips that he took my mouth by storm.
My eyes fell closed. I shivered and parted my lips wider as soon as his mouth was on mine. Where I had thought the kiss from last night was incredibly lust-fi
lled, this one was something else entirely. The storm made of heat waves crashed so low in my belly that my core clenched repeatedly, as if trying to mimic the movements I wanted Mathis to do with me, inside of me. My blood didn’t just rush through my veins and furthering the heat sensation going through my body, it boiled until a light sheen of sweat appeared on my brow line and at the nape of my neck, his hands still lost through my mane of hair, keeping me there. My hands shook on his shoulders, belaying the tension mounting inside me and the explosion of emotions going off inside me.
But strangely, my mind was empty of anything that didn’t have anything to do with what my husband was doing to me at that very moment. Nothing else mattered and I had no worries whatsoever.
It was incredibly freeing.
It was heady.
It made me want to kiss him forever.
I moaned in his mouth when his teeth sank in my pillowy lower lip and I pushed against him, trying to get closer to him and feel his firm chest flat against my heavy breasts in hopes it could relieve me of the need to feel his big hands on them.
But like everything with Mathis Grimes, he wouldn’t let me.
He did the very opposite to what I wanted and broke the kiss. I opened my eyes and stared at him through heavy lids. I was met with his dazed look and my stupid heart did something strange like cartwheels in my chest.
Both of us heaving, our hands still on each other, we didn’t move for a few seconds until his hands left my hair to stop at my shoulders. He put pressure on them until I leaned back.
Somewhere, somehow, I was aware that I should be slightly self-conscious to be sprawled on the couch in my husband’s office during lunch break with my hair probably a mess and my clothes askew while, and with just a quick glance down his incredible body, my husband sported a very impressive erection tenting his smart slacks. But I didn’t care that we were in his office. I didn’t care if people would be back to their cubicles and offices close by. I didn’t care if doubts would creep in later on once the madness evaporated.
Be A Doll: A Carter Manor Novel Page 15
