by Ally Miller
Trevor woke suddenly. Startled. He couldn’t catch his breath in time. Cautiously he looked around his den, swinging his tail around and wings in front of him as defense. It didn’t take long for him to realize what had woke him as he looked up at the ceiling and then all around him. The small shards of minerals reflected the light trickling in from the sunrise right outside his cave.
It was as if the fragments had been dripping in sunlight from the way they twinkled in Trevor’s eyes. He took a deep breath and lay back, bringing a piece into his claws to fiddle with. It dawned on him, slowly, that it was another full day he’d spent on his other form. Trevor, as he was so called, hadn’t even attempted to change into his human form for the longest time.
Excuse after excuse came up in his mind. Why do I need to change anyway? Being a dragon is so much easier. He scoffed at the thought of having to deal with people again. With being rejected again.
A thought that’d been nagging him came up. You’re not worth her time... The fear of rejection for his true self, mixed with the need of mate, drove Trevor to a painful self-induced confliction. He wanted nothing more than to share his life with someone. His fears and his desires while they could spend all they could with him. In the deepest parts of his heart, though aching, he missed the feeling of warmth, being with someone regardless of how it ended.
Growing frustrated with himself, Trevor got up and lumbered out of his den. As his tail trailed behind him out of the cave’s mouth, the sun greeted Trevor’s scales with warmth all over. He sighed, taking in the sounds of the birds in the trees just waking up, and the fresh air full of moisture from the nearby river. This… this is home… he thought.
The lush forest going on for miles, far from his home in the bustling city was the one place Trevor could breathe. He walked around self-made walkways and paths though the tall oak trees and evergreens lovingly sprinkled all over. Birds flew overhead just above his horns. The ground beneath him shook with every step and Trevor swore that he could feel every animal in the forest moving in time with his footsteps.
“So lovely,” he cooed to the patches of flowers scattered about. His claw swept a few up and carried them to the tops of the trees just to watch all the petals fall. “Delicate and desirable. Shame I wasn’t born half flower…”
He couldn’t take his words wholly seriously and coughed up a chuckle. Taking a stroll through the forest, naked in the morning’s wake, he couldn’t help feeling like something was missing. He mused upon himself while conversing with the trees and the squirrels, but the thought still stirred him. These thoughts aren’t going to go away are they? He wondered, taking a spot by the rushing rover.
Trevor clawed at the ground as he thought. Damn. If I can’t even enjoy myself here what’s the point? There’s not even a chance trying with people anymore either… He fought against the mixed feelings welling up in his chest and making him shift around.
There was that one girl though… In flashes the memories came back to him. First meeting on a computer screen and then meeting in real life. He knew he had a chance with this girl. He’d already gotten the first part done.
He didn’t know how long it’d been since the last time he’d spoken to her—to anyone. What was her name again…? The image of a petite girl with auburn hair came to mind, but not a name. Trevor shook his head. Probably not that important. If she can even remember me.
A snort of fire singed the thin grass at Trevor’s claws. His tail thumped behind him in contemplation. If I do this, this could change everything. Might as well take a chance, right?
No reason not to…
With a sigh, acknowledging that he’d given in, he spread his wings and took to the sky. It didn’t take long for him to feel his heart race and his claws shake.
It was finally time to go on a date.
Chapter 2
Dressed in a shabby dress shirt and matching dark pants, Trevor walked out of the parking lot and up to the restaurant. A few others walked alongside him. Several pairs, each a man with a divinely dressed woman clinging to his arm. Seeing them from the corners of his eyes as he made his way to the front door of the small, but classy looking black and red building made him feel uneasy.
The feeling of unknowing mixed with numerous doubts started to creep up in the back of his mind. He nearly choked on his own words as he walked in and went up to the hostess to ask about his reservation. “Excuse me, sir. May I help you?” she asked with a kind smile. The petite brunette waited patiently as Trevor checked the time on his watch again. It’s 7:30 on the dot. There is no way that she wouldn’t be here by now, Trevor thought as he forced himself to swallow the knot forming in his throat.
“Yes, um, my name is Trevor Sull is there a Rebecca here?” The hostess sifted through her notes, but judging by the look on her face she was readying herself to give Trevor a negative answer. Starting to quietly panic a little, Trevor added: “Sorry, I’m a little later than I scheduled. I was hoping to meet someone here around 7 o’clock instead of 7:30.”
The hostess shook her head and set her pen down to look at me. “No, it doesn’t look like anyone came through with that name. Are you sure you got the time right?”
Trevor wanted to look away as his hands balled into fists. He could feel the dragon clawing at his heart in a flash of rage, but he swallowed it and stowed his dragon away. If he lost it here, he’d cause more than just a scene and it’d make his night all the more horrible. “I’m sure of it,” Trevor growled under his breath, traces of his dragon fighting against him.
The hostess, not knowing what else to say, uncomfortably rubbed her hands together and said, “I’m sorry sir.”
Just before she could say, “Is there anything else I can help you with?” Trevor cut her off with a sharp snarl.
Trevor growled again, stuffing his hands into his pockets and turning away from her. “Don’t be.”
***
Countless cars whisked by Trevor as he shuffled down the sidewalk on his own. Brisk winds found their ways into his dress coat, making him shiver. The man in him always hated the cold, but the dragon in him loved it. It was just another thing that he couldn’t agree with within himself. Another thing that drove his inner turmoil that seemed to slowly rip his humanity apart.
He could feel the dragon biting at him and clawing at him—begging to get out. The anger he’d felt back at the restaurant was still of burning at his core, but the flames were starting to dim. The combination of the cold outside and the sadness took its toll on the man overtaking the beast.
With no one around to blame but himself, Trevor couldn’t help but feel as though things were hopeless for him. Will I ever find the one? Could I ever find the one? The questions swirled around his head as he asked himself again and again. In the back of his mind he knew there had to be someone out there that would accept him for who he was, but he wasn’t lucky enough to find them.
At least not yet.
Not even his closest friends knew of his condition as much as he wanted to tell them. He just figured it’d end up the same as his relationships did: hardship and heartache. All for a brief moment of happiness. All was for not. Even in a city full of people he still hadn’t found her. Just knowing he had each and every opportunity helped keep the burning anger deeper inside of himself and made the sadness all the heavier.
Most people would be frightened to walk this route alone in the middle the night. Especially since there was hardly a passerby. A few streetlamps had gone dim along the way, making it hard to see occasionally. Trevor had walked down this path so many times that the fear that once struck him as he trudged down the street now turned as cold as the air around him. Thanks to his dragon, he knew that nothing bad could happen to him. Even if it did, he’d only need to growl or snarl at his pursuer. He’d seen the looks in previous men’s eyes when they looked at him as a beast. No longer a man himself, he imagined that he looked at them the same way. He looked at them with a gaze that would sway the sturdiest of wills and lowe
r any gun they dared to point at him.
Trevor kept his eyes on the sidewalk watching the passing lines as if they’d help distract him from his thoughts. He knew there was no point in looking up. There was hardly anyone out at this time of night—at least on this block. The crowd he was used to passing by would come around later, so he didn’t have to worry for a while. In a way, he almost wished that he would bump into someone who’d knock some sense into him.
“Help!” shrieked a feminine voice to Trevor’s right.
“Huh?” He froze and looked around, waiting to hear the sound again. Did I imagine that…?
“Ah! Someone help me! Please!”
The dragon in Trevor jumped at the voice and he immediately locked onto the sound, turning his attention to the sound and peering into the dark alley in front of him. He stared into it for a while, looking for any sign of movement as he took a step forward and then another. His movements were stiff—silent as he crept further down the alleyway.
“Shut the fuck up.”
Trevor caught the low growl a few feet ahead of him. Without a second thought, the beast in him came out and he snarled, charging forth to see a man cornering a woman by a dumpster. Trevor towered over the man and shadows covered his face now looking more akin to a dragon than a man. The man slowly turned around asking, “What the hell…?” Before he could face Trevor, Trevor grasped the man at the sides and tossed him to the side.
The woman gasped, and Trevor growled as the man’s knife fell to the ground and he crashed into a scrapheap nearby, creating a loud clamor. The man struggled to get up, trembling as Trevor turned his attention away from the woman and lumbered over to the man. Trevor growled lowly, leaning down to check on him. He didn’t move, but Trevor could hear him breathing—gasping for breaths. He’ll be fine, Trevor thought as he took a deep breath and started to revert back into his human form. When he stepped back into one of the lighter spots in the alley, his face came into view.
She shivered as he came near as Trevor towered over her the same as he did the man who was threatening her before. “Are you all right?” Trevor asked softly, keeping a respectful distance from her.
“I…I think I’m okay…” she replied just as quietly.
“Are you sure?”
She nodded. “Y-yeah… I live another block or two from here, so I think I’ll be all right getting back.”
Why are you looking at me like that? Trevor thought as he stared into the woman’s blue eyes and looked over her long, wavy dark hair. “All right. Take care, all right?”
Trevor started to back away from her, but the woman reached out to him and grabbed his arm saying, “Stop!” He paused. “W-wait… Is that really it?”
“What do you mean?” Trevor asked, still facing toward the entry to the alleyway.
“You…you saved me and we don’t even know each other’s names…”
Trevor shrugged and said, “I figured you wouldn’t want to be bothered by another guy after that. Did I…guess wrongly?” Trevor slowly turned around to face the woman who’d let go of his arm.
She held out a hand and said, “I’m Brenda.”
“Trevor,” he replied as he took her hand, shaking it. “I’m sorry if I seem a bit off… I haven’t been having the best night…” Trevor said as he looked off to the side.
Brenda shrugged, but tried to smile a little as she said, “Don’t worry about it. As you can probably guess… I haven’t had the best night either.”
“Yeah…” Trevor grumbled as his eyes trailed over to the body still at the other end of the alleyway. “Why don’t we get outta here? Who knows what else could jump out at us?”
They walked side by side out of the alley. Trevor looked over at Brenda and asked, “So, how’d you wind up in that mess anyway?”
Brenda scoffed, wrapping her arms around herself. “It’s not a usual thing for me, I promise. I’ve gone home on nights worse than this without a scratch on me, but I guess tonight my luck ran out.”
“I’d say the same if I had any luck to start with.” They made their way down the sidewalk, and even though the winds sent shivers down Trevor’s spine, he found warmth being around Brenda.
“Yeah? What happened to you?” Brenda asked as she looked over at Trevor.
“Just…bullshit.” Trevor shook his head a little as he remembered the anger and sadness he’d felt earlier. “But the bullshit that happened to me wouldn’t be remotely as bad as what happened to you, so don’t worry about it.”
“We have another block if you need to get something off your chest,” Brenda replied, trying to get Trevor’s attention by lightly tapping his arm. “It’s the least I could do after all.”
Trevor sighed, looking into Brenda’s eyes that seemed to plead him. “Fine, fine… I got stood up tonight. That’s it.” Saying it aloud pained Trevor to say more than he thought they would and he could feel his dragon clawing at his heart. The pent up frustration he’d relieved earlier wasn’t enough to keep his dragon at bay and he knew he’d need another excursion to feel whole again.
Before he could dwell on his thoughts, Brenda stroked his arm and said, “Aw.”
“Yeah, I know,” Trevor replied coldly, looking away from her.
“I can’t say that I’ve had that problem recently… Not because I’m taken, unfortunately. It’s just work tends to take up most of my time now, so I don’t have much time for dates.”
Trevor scoffed. “Working from home gives me nothing but time sometimes. That’s what I get for trying to find someone online, I guess.”
“Well, if you wanna look at it another way… If she hadn’t stood you up, I don’t know what would’ve happened to me by now,” Brenda whispered just loud enough for Trevor to hear.
He looked down at her, slightly annoyed at first, but as soon as her words sank in he knew that she was right. “Yeah, I guess so…”
“…Oh, here we are!” said Brenda as she walked out in front of Trevor and stopped at the front door of a large townhouse. Before she reached for the doorknob, she turned around and said, “Um, wait a minute…” She hastily pulled out a piece of paper and scribbled something on it before handing it to Trevor. “If you want… Call me sometime and we can go on that date you missed out on tonight. I think we’d both appreciate getting to know each other under more romantic circumstances.”
Trevor smiled, clutching the scrap of paper in his hand. “That would be nice…”
He expected her to turn, but just before she did, she said, “And Trevor? Thanks.”
Chapter 3
The scrap of paper, now nearly crumpled up into dust, lay on the coffee table across from Trevor. He stared at it as if it’d make a difference between the number he’d been staring at on his phone. His grip grew tighter and tighter around it as his thoughts fought each other. If he was going to take another chance, then he’d have to take it while he had it. “When you fall off the horse you’re supposed to get back on, right?” he asked himself in a whisper.
“Dammit!” he growled, throwing his phone into the cushion beside him. “I can save a girl, and walk her home, but I can’t even call her for the life of me!” Trevor dragged a hand down his face, nearly leaving claw marks on his flesh. “Maybe I can just do it quick… Like a band-aid… My brain won’t even know what’s comin’ then.”
Trevor fiddled with his thumbs as he reviewed the idea. Okay, he thought as he shot his hand out and grabbed his phone. He turned the screen on and pressed the green button before his doubts could catch him. After two agonizing rings from the other side, the line picked up and a feminine voice on the other side asked, “Hello?”
“Brenda?” he blurted out with an extra amount of giddiness.
“Trevor?” asked the other end.
“Yeah, it’s me,” Trevor replied, feeling a smile forming across his face.
“I was wondering when you’d call. Did you want to take me up on that date?” Her voice sounded lighter than Trevor remembered, but it made the butterf
lies in his stomach settle a little knowing she might be feeling the same as him.
“I… I, um… Yes. I would. I mean, if that’s okay with you…” Trevor could barely choke the words out of his mouth and he smacked himself on the side of his head after he’d uttered the last word.
Brenda giggled quietly on the other end before replying. “I’ve got a pretty busy week ahead, so is tonight all right with you?”
Are you kidding me? It’d tear me to pieces if I had to wait any longer! “Yeah, yeah… That’s perfect for me too, actually. Should I pick you up, or…?”
“Don’t think I can get there on my own, huh?” Brenda teased.
Trevor’s muscles tensed at the question and he hastily blurted, “No! I mean… I just meant, uh…”
She giggled again. “I’m kidding! Meet me outside my place at six and we’ll walk to a restaurant that’s nearby. You remember where I live, right?”
How could I forget? “Yeah, I remember. I’ll see you then, Brenda.”
“See you!”
Trevor hit the red button to end the call and flung his phone onto one of the cushions nearby. “Here’s hoping they won’t be having the same hostess tonight,” he muttered to himself.
***
Trevor took a deep breath and hesitantly pulled his phone out to send the text he’d gotten ready nearly an hour prior. As much as he wanted to surprise her with something new, he didn’t have better clothes than the ones he’d wore when he met Brenda, so he hoped that she wouldn’t mind or take notice. Air filling his lungs to their fullest, he forced himself to send the text that said, “I’m here.”
As he stood outside the townhouse, he did his best to shake off the doubts, but one question hung in his mind, Should I tell her?
Before his thoughts could come to a conclusion, the door before him opened, revealing the same blue-eyed, wavy haired woman he’d saved not long ago. “Wow,” he whispered in a gasp. Trevor couldn’t take his eyes off the dazzling green dress that hugged each and every one of Brenda’s curves perfectly. If he didn’t know any better, he’d think that the dress was custom designed just for her. “You look…amazing,” he said louder than he’d intended, making Brenda giggle as streaks of red accented her cheeks.