Stupid Girl: A Fantasy Adventure Based in French Folklore (Faite Falling Book 4)

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Stupid Girl: A Fantasy Adventure Based in French Folklore (Faite Falling Book 4) Page 17

by Mary E. Twomey


  “Because if I didn’t, you would’ve done something reckless. I fear my temper losing all control if you get another mere scratch on you.” He frowned again, as if caught in the act of being sweet to me when he’d wanted to scold. “But now Morgan knows I’m capable of carnage like that on a grander scale. She can take countermeasures for the next time, plan around my abilities that were mere myth to her before today. She’s a chess player, and now she’s seen what my queen can do. She’ll spot holes in my defenses. When I tell you no, it’s for a reason.”

  “Yes, boss.”

  Kerdik’s eyebrows were pushed together in concern. “And that boyfriend of yours? He’s a lunatic. I’d never seen someone with no shred of self-preservation until I watched your crazy boyfriend hurl himself into the thick of the battle.”

  My mouth went dry. “Bastien’s okay though? He lived?”

  “I’m afraid there’s no cure for the insanity that plagues his mind and makes him ridiculously foolhardy, but yes, I enhanced his body when we first met in that field, remember? He can endure far more than the average soldier, and he was never that. Plus, you gave him your lueur, which added to his prowess. I think he’s only just becoming aware of all he can do now.” He leaned over and jerked on the vines that ensnared my wrists and ankles. Easy as if they were made of yarn, the binds shredded and fell to the packed dirt floor. “Better?”

  “Much. Thank you.” He massaged my sore wrists for me. His touch was gentle to contrast with his stern gaze as he pulled me to my feet. I tilted my head up to stare at him. “Hey, Kerdik?”

  “Yes?”

  “Thanks for helping, even though it wasn’t your battle.” I leaned up on my toes and wrapped my arms around his neck, pecking his cheek to let him know I was grateful he’d fought for me, and grateful he’d survived.

  “You’re always my queen,” he whispered to me like a promise. Kerdik rocked us side to side for a few beats, looking at me like I was someone worth going into battle for. “Let’s gather up the children before their parents have a conniption, yeah? I’m afraid I can’t take another person screaming.”

  “But how do we…” I didn’t get out the entire sentence before Kerdik tsked me for questioning his awesome power. He turned us and waved his arm in the direction of the children who had all fallen asleep on the grass he’d grown them. My eyes bulged when tall, violet-colored sunflowers rose up from the grass, their stalks stretching taller than me. Then he pursed his lips and blew a puff of air that multiplied as it wafted toward them, building into a slight breeze that carried the scent of the sunflowers over the children.

  Slowly, the kids started to stir. The pounding on the outer door to the keep was resumed by none other than my zealous boyfriend, who was shouting my name. Kerdik rolled his eyes at Bastien’s tenacity, and clicked his fingers at the wall of trees he’d erected to hold me inside, and keep the bad guys out. The trees melted into the floor like they were being sucked down through a straw. The kids awoke to confusion, and then terrified screams broke out when they saw Kerdik’s arm still around me.

  Kerdik’s eyes narrowed after I caught a glimpse of hurt at their immediate negative reaction to him. He made to move away, but I kept him glued to my side and cleared my throat to garner everyone’s attention. “Hey, kids. I want everyone to line up along the wall and tell Kerdik thank you. He let you all take a nap so that your magic would be stronger than ever. Kerdik believes in you, and knows you can do great things for Avalon. He invested in each one of you, and I want you to keep that in your heart. You are worth an immortal taking his time to restore your magic to full power.” I was tucked into Kerdik’s side with his arm around my back. My hand reached over and rubbed his chest to soothe the ache I knew was there. “Kerdik went out to fight with Province 9 against Morgan la Fae. She attacked us, but Kerdik cared so much about you all that he fought with your parents to keep us safe.”

  Kerdik raised one eyebrow to question my blatant lie. “That’s certainly a remarkable story you’re telling them.”

  I moved my hand over and pinched his side to shut him up. “Before we go out to see your parents, I want each of you to say ‘thank you’ to Kerdik for being our brave hero today.”

  David was my right-hand man, so he set the example by going first, his younger siblings trailing close behind him, glued to his shadow. “Thank you, Master Kerdik.” He bowed his head, and then trotted over to the doors to the keep, thrusting up the heavy latch and opening the first set of doors.

  I didn’t want to leave Kerdik’s side, but David was having trouble with the second set of doors, so I jogged over to help him. I could hear mothers on the other side of the barricade, their cries rising in time with their fists that banged on the outer doors. I gave David a quick hug before we pushed open the last of the series of doors.

  The mothers and fathers flooded into the keep, stopping short when they saw Kerdik. He braced himself for the shrieks he was used to, but they never came. The men and women gave him jerky, terrified bows in gratitude for fighting with their province before moving on to find their children. The parents scooped up their kids with tearstained faces. They had filthy hands and blood on their shirts and aprons. Adrenaline was still ebbing, so tears flowed freely as mother, father and child alike were overjoyed at being reunited.

  Bastien and I were holding ourselves back, staring into each other’s eyes like bulls ready to be released from the pen. I knew that if I touched him at all, it would be the PG-13 kiss unsuitable for the thousands of children who ran around us. Bastien had streaks of blood in his hair that ran down his face and neck. He had too many cuts and red marks to count, but none of that seemed to bother him. His eyes were locked in on mine as his nostrils flared with desire.

  A few of the mothers shrieked at the sight of King Urien, still lying supine towards the far end of the keep. They bowed to him, even though he could not see the gesture, and then made their way to the exit where I stood. I tried to be gracious when the parents got down on their hands and knees to thank me for keeping their children safe, but the whole thing really wasn’t my bag. I hugged each of the mothers after they rose to their feet, and shook each dad’s hand, hopefully making it clear that we were in this together, and that I was grateful to look after their little treasures.

  I was holding it together pretty well until Babette’s mother came to collect her sweetheart. I’d met her a few times when she’d dropped off her daughter to play, and knew the dark-haired mid-thirties beauty well enough. Of all the moms I was glad to see, Babette’s mother gave me the most relief. After bowing to me, I gave her the standard hug I’d been doling out, expecting to quickly move onto the next parent in the long line. Only Babette’s mother didn’t let go. She sobbed on my shoulder, squeezing emotion out of me like an overfull tube of lotion. Tears were squished out of me when I imagined Babette being left an orphan to fend for herself with so much of life already stacked against her. I saw myself without a mother to watch over me, and tried not to completely break down.

  “Thank you for coming back to Avalon,” she gulped out as she held on too tight. “We’ve never had the strength to stand up to Morgan la Fae before, but now? Now we can do anything, with the Avalon Rose by our side.”

  The other women nodded with enthusiasm at the nickname I’d been given at my coronation. The rest of the women did the bow and hug with me, but then tacked on for their children to thank “the Avalon Rose.”

  Yeah, I was a tear-streaked mess after that.

  Kerdik’s mere presence kept the mothers and children from lingering in the keep. Once they were all gone, Kerdik made his way over to Urien to give Bastien and me a moment of privacy.

  I wanted to say something cool and sexy, but all that happened was me bursting into fresh tears. “Kerdik said you were fighting like a maniac! You’re not allowed to do that ever again. I was stuck down here, terrified for you! I didn’t know if I’d ever see your face after this!”

  “Honey,” Bastien started, his hands up i
n surrender.

  I didn’t want to hear it. “You’re not allowed to go into any more battles, do you hear me? If you die, then what? I don’t care if I’m being selfish, I need you alive!”

  Before I could shout another word, Bastien closed the distance between us in a few long steps taken at a run. He scooped me up in his arms that felt strong and capable, lifting me so that he had to raise his chin to kiss me. My arms draped around his neck, and my legs gripped his waist so I could keep myself right where we wanted me.

  “Never again,” I worked out between kisses. We were desperate to get closer to each other, clawing at material and scratching the skin beneath. I tugged hard on his hair, but then paused when my hands were coated in something warm and wet. I gasped into his mouth when too much blood coated my fingers. “Bastien! You’re hurt!” I really should’ve put that together earlier, but my brain wasn’t processing things in the right order. I unlocked my legs and slid down his body, horrified at how much damage he’d endured up close.

  Bastien had the gall to shrug. “It’s a few scratches. Looks worse than it is.”

  I balked at him. “Are you kidding me with this? You’re going straight to Remy. Let’s go.” I called over my shoulder. “You coming, Kerdik?”

  Kerdik hefted up my father’s body. “I’ll take Urien back to his room.”

  Bastien shot over me at Kerdik a sarcastic, “Hey, thanks for ratting me out to my woman. She doesn’t need to know what happens out on the battlefield.”

  “You’re welcome, you psycho. Next time you try to take on an entire army by yourself, be sure to invite me to the massacre. You do put on a good show.”

  Before Bastien could spout back a fiery retort, Kerdik vanished with Urien, leaving us alone in the keep. Bastien waggled his eyebrows at me, suddenly playful and seeming to think this was the perfect space for a reunion. He grinned at me, but the gorgeous smile I adored was marred when a trickle of blood dribbled from his nose into his mouth, dying a few teeth red. “Straight to Remy,” I ordered, turning him around and shoving him toward the exit.

  Errant Pervy Thoughts

  Remy had been spreading the word about my gift to his community, so perhaps the influx of healers who’d sought refuge in Lane’s province shouldn’t have been all that much of a shocker, but when the numbers totaled over a hundred, I couldn’t help but gape. Healers from all over had apparently been told that the Lost Princess could listen to them, so they came in droves.

  In the aftermath of the battle, it turns out that too many healers is the best problem to have. They set up on the steps of the mansion, treating people on the wide dais as the injured were brought to them by the dozens. The sun still hadn’t risen completely, but there was a promise of natural light on its way that could replace the lanterns’ glow.

  The children made themselves useful searching out herbs and roots the healers needed to take care of the wounded, and thanks to the quick response of everyone, no farmer, weary deserter soldier from Morgan’s Army, or layman was made to wait all that long for treatment. The older kids helped wash strips of cloth that were used for bandages, and brought the wounded warriors water. It was kind of amazing to watch the province in action, tending to needs without being asked for the sacrifice. Everyone was on their way to getting back on their feet.

  Except my stubborn mule of a boyfriend. Bastien insisted the other men and women go before him, giving up his space in line over and over again. I would be pissed at him, but it was so sweet that I couldn’t maintain my frustration.

  Finally I pulled Remy aside after he’d finished stitching up the leg he’d been working on. I led him over to Bastien, giving him a look that told him not to test me. “I don’t need a healer. It’s a few scratches, Rosie.”

  “This is more than a few scratches.”

  “You’re telling me. You got anything in your doctor bag for being bull-headed, Remy?”

  “Just the usual torture devices,” he replied with an evil grin.

  I snorted in response. “How can I help? He sleeps now, and I know he’s probably tired, but should he be going to sleep with a head wound like that?”

  Bastien rolled his eyes. “Oh, brother. You’re making a big deal out of nothing.”

  Link made kissing noises, followed by “Aw, is my wittle Bastien sweetie baby not feewing well?”

  Damond smirked at the needling, his uniform basically untouched. I’m guessing Draper put his foot down that Damond was to stay back, instead of fight too near the front lines. “Sit down, Bastien the Bold. You look utterly destroyed.”

  Bastien glowered at me. “See what you did there?”

  “The battle’s been over long enough for me not to worry about damage to his brain. He seems lucid enough, though watching him fling himself into the fray like that…” Remy shuddered. “If you ever doubted that he’s loyal to your cause, take in every gash on his body as proof that he loves you.”

  I shot a look of warning at my faithful healer knight. “Don’t stick up for him, Remy; it’ll only make me madder.”

  Remy smirked as he started mopping off the blood from Bastien’s head so he could better assess the injuries. “Apologies, Princess. After I finish up here, I’d like to take another look at King Urien. Is he still in the keep?”

  “No, Kerdik took his body back to his room.”

  “Very good. It’s cold and dank down there. Not fit for a king.”

  I tried to hear Remy, but so many other people were talking. When a man came to stand next to Remy, looking like he wanted my attention, I realized the healers were all thinking to themselves. I was hearing not only the thoughts of the healers, but the conversations between the men and women getting patched up, as well. “Is it true you can hear us, your majesty?”

  I nodded at the red-headed man who looked to be about five years older than Remy. I closed my eyes and put my hands over my ears. “Sure, but it’s a little overwhelming. I mean, I can hear all of you talking at once. What’s your name?”

  Bastien tugged my hand from my left ear. “You’re shouting, Daisy.”

  “What?” As more healers started to react to the confirmation of me being able to hear Remy, plus a second healer, individual people grew impossible to pick out.

  The healers stood, migrating toward me to get a word in, but that consequently meant not a word was getting to me, since they were all talking over each other.

  Of course, to the other people of Province 9, I no doubt looked like a lunatic, shouting responses to questions they couldn’t hear and covering my ears while a hundred silent grown men and women surrounded me. I cringed when errant thoughts they hopefully hadn’t meant for me to hear intruded my mind. Apparently, I had good birthing hips and supple breasts with pert nipples that would be good for nursing a baby. Good to know. A few of them had… ungentlemanly things to say about my butt. This was the raw thoughts of dozens and dozens of people, uncensored. I guessed that most of the men were single, judging by the errant lewd thoughts and lack of wedding rings. They’d been isolated from society, being called on when they were needed, but largely ignored until there was a problem for them to solve.

  The healers kept up their rapid thoughts, moving closer and closer until I was starting to feel a little claustrophobic. Madigan stood and beelined for me, seeing that I was starting to lose my cool. I shouted above the commotion. “Okay, I want to hear all of you, but I’m literally getting every thought that’s coming into your minds. You might want to clean it up before bringing it over here. Whichever one of you wants to see me naked and bend me over your knee, I can hear you, and it’s gross.” I stood straighter when they balked at me, stupefied. “You’re going to have to do a lot better than acting like gentlemen and ladies. You’re going to have to actually be gentlemen and ladies. I’ll know the difference.”

  Bastien stood from his spot on the porch when I was backed down the steps out onto the grass. Draper had been on the far corner of the porch, but rose unsteadily to move towards me, feeling his way
along the banister. “Healers, back to your posts. Best behavior around the princess.”

  Damond frowned at the mute crowd. “My cousin will not be objectified, especially not after keeping all the children of our kingdom safe.”

  “Oh, you guys. Go back and sit down. I’m alright.” I breathed a little easier when Draper was lowered back to his spot on the porch. A healer set to work mending a cut on his leg.

  Damond reached out and gripped my fingers, meeting my eyes before he went back to organizing supplies for the wounded. “I’m just over there, if you need me.”

  “Thanks, man.” We shared a smirk, being two young’uns with too much authority in a world that was set up to devour us whole.

  “The Avalon Rose will listen to each one of you, once you’re all finished helping Duchess Elaine by treating her people. Now, go on back and let my charge breathe.” Bastien put his hand on my shoulder and let out a long, intrusive whistle, which made everyone wince. Not fifteen seconds later, Abraham Lincoln came bounding down the field toward me with Hamish on his back.

  When a few men cautiously drew their spears, I held out my hands to stop them from impaling my sweetheart. “Stop! That’s just Abraham Lincoln. He’s my friend, and he won’t hurt anyone.”

  “You want us to stand back and hope a bear doesn’t maul the Avalon Rose?” one of the farmers asked.

  Link stood on my other side, enforcing my rule. “You’ve all seen the bear brawling alongside us out there on the field. He’s a mite more loyal to her than the average beast.”

  The same question was repeated around me: “What’d he say?”

  “He said that Abraham Lincoln’s cool, so don’t hurt him.”

  Link frowned. “Jays, my accent’s not tha thick.”

  “Of course not. You’re a total native.” I motioned for the healers to go back and finish their jobs. Then I waved Abraham Lincoln over so I could run my fingers through his thick fur. “Hi, baby. You weren’t fighting, were you?”

 

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