Dad cleared his throat. “Speaking of weddings. . .”
“Is someone getting married?”
“We’re talking about you, Sweetheart.” Mom scooted her chair closer. “You’re spending an awful lot of time with that Adams man.”
“Did Val put you up to this?”
“Nope.” Dad leaned on the table and shook his head. “Honey, we reared you to do the right thing, to live by the Bible. You know you’re not to set your heart on a man who isn’t walking with the Lord. My understanding is Nathan Adams lost his wife, and he’s bitter toward God.”
“He is.”
“Then why are you dating him?” Mom frowned.
Vanessa sighed. “Once and for all, we are not dating. I get paid each time we meet, and you certainly didn’t rear me to be that kind of woman!”
Her mom’s eyes widened, and she chided, “Vanessa!”
“Okay, Mom. Sorry. I got a bit carried away, but all of this concern feels like such an overreaction.” When her parents didn’t respond, she hastened on. “I’m giving him puppy obedience lessons. Most of the time, we have Amber, his black Lab, and his son with us. We’ve never eaten out unless you count an ice cream cone or fast food. He’s a friend.”
“Friends can become more than friends”—Mom looked her in the eye—“especially when the woman is as compassionate and sympathetic as you are. Your whole childhood, you gravitated toward people and animals who needed special attention. You’ve grown into an empathetic woman who cares freely and deeply. I’m worried that you’re getting absorbed into Nathan Adams’s world. He’s a wounded man, and you can’t fix him.”
Vanessa rubbed her face with both hands and looked away for a moment, then looked back at her mother. Quietly, she admitted, “I know I can’t. I’m just trying to come alongside him as a Christian sister.”
Mom dipped her head ever so slightly and looked at Vanessa with her I-mean-business glare. “Sister? Friend? Those are nice labels, but my radar is sending off boyfriend alarms.”
“Mom, I’m not dating him. I’m so busy with the shop and the private lessons and the baseball team and the puppy training club, there isn’t time. My life is full, and my heart isn’t empty. I figure God will put the right man in my life when He wills it.”
“Nathan is on that team, isn’t he?” Dad asked pointedly.
“Yes, he is.” Vanessa grinned. “And he just took his son to the tide pools with the primary department today. I have faith that the Good Shepherd will bring back His straying lamb. It’s a matter of letting God be God.”
“Don’t get involved romantically with a man and expect him to change.” Dad stood. “It’s wrong, Honey.”
“I agree, Dad. I need to get going. I’ll see you at church tomorrow.”
❧
Nathan lay in bed and stared at the stained-glass window. A streetlight shone through it just enough to make the pattern apparent. Evie had surprised him with the window the year she was carrying Jeff. It was a Christmas present, and she’d managed to save up the money for it by squirreling away her change. He’d been so surprised. Little things add up. Just think—we’re going to have the best little thing of all. She’d wear that dreamy look and rub her tummy.
Then, too, once he set the window into their bedroom wall, she’d lie next to him and imagine all the different things the window could mean. Three flowers. . .you, me, and the baby. Or is it the Trinity? Father, Son, and Holy Spirit. . .the ribbon holding them is love. I’m sure of that. Nothing is stronger than love.
Now, he lay there, and her words echoed in his mind. So did Jeff’s. Dad? Why don’t we go to church?
He rolled over and smacked his pillow.
God, You know why I don’t go to church. I refuse to be a hypocrite. I’m not going to go and pretend I understand. I don’t. I don’t have the kind of faith that makes everything okay and lets me dump everything into Your hands. I’m mad. No, I’m livid. Bad enough, You took my wife, but how could You rob Jeff of his mother? I wouldn’t want someone who held a grudge against me in my home. Why should I go to Yours?
Sleep wouldn’t come. Hearing a light, puppy whimper, Nathan shoved aside his blankets and got up. He took Lick out to the backyard and grumbled, “Okay. Do your business.”
How many times had he heard Vanessa give Amber that same command? He’d chuckled the first time he overheard it. That was back when he didn’t know the special commands she used in training. Now it all made sense and came as second nature.
Lick complied, then ran to the other side of the yard. “Come.” Nathan waited, but the puppy ignored him.
He squatted down and reached out. “Come, Lick.”
The puppy continued to wander on his own path.
“Lick, come on, Boy.”
Lick perked up his head, his tail wagged, and he bounded across the yard, straight to Nathan.
Nathan felt a spurt of irritation, then squelched it. He couldn’t punish this silly little, wiggly ball of fluff. Lick had obeyed the call and come. If he got punished, he’d be less likely to come again in the future. Instead, Nathan cradled the puppy in his arms and took him inside. As he stuck Lick back in his bed in the corner of Jeff’s room, Jeff stirred.
“Dad?”
“What?”
“You never answered my question. Can we go to church?”
Nathan stayed motionless and stared across the dim room at his innocent little boy. I don’t have to make a big deal of this. We’ll go just once. That’ll satisfy him. Even that agreement felt like a huge concession.
“I wanna go.”
Each word strained his vocal cords as Nathan said, “We’ll go tomorrow.”
Fourteen
His shoes pinched. His dress socks had a hole in one toe, courtesy of Licorice. One of the buttons on his suit dangled by a thread, and he’d forgotten he’d tossed his favorite tie in the drawer the last time he wore it, so he had to settle for another one that had a small mustard stain. For being a successful businessman, he looked like a bum.
Man looks at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart. The verse ran through his mind, and as Nathan pulled into a parking space, he muttered, “I’m striking out on both accounts.”
Giggling, Jeff bounced along the sidewalk as they headed toward the sanctuary. “Hey—there’s Andy! He’s in my class at school.”
It didn’t take much time to settle Jeff into a Sunday-school class, then Nathan stared at the sanctuary. Each step took resolve. I could just leave and come back to pick up Jeff, but I said we’d go to church. If I don’t stay, I would be lying.
He hadn’t attended Seaside Chapel before and was surprised to discover how that very fact actually made it easier to go inside the sanctuary. Instead of having to endure the inevitable flood of memories from Mercy Springs, there was simple curiosity on his part. A greeter shook his hand, and an usher handed him the bulletin—familiar rituals that should have given comfort, but just left him feeling hollow. He could endure one day of this.
He saw Valene sitting near the aisle. Amber was lying curled up, “being small,” just to the side of the pew. A couple sat beside Val—her parents, he presumed. Nathan slipped into the pew directly behind her, set down the bulletin, and leaned forward. Tapping her on the shoulder, he murmured, “Don’t look now—the roof might cave in. I came to church.”
“You’d better look,” she whispered back. “I’m Val.”
“I know.” He flashed a quick smile at her. “Van couldn’t sit as still as you do or stay quiet. She’d be chattering up a storm with half the congregation and make a last-minute mad dash for a seat.” He glanced around, hoping to see Vanessa. With Amber right here, she had to be close—a fact that made him feel a little less anxious. Until now, he hadn’t realized how much he was counting on her being there to be his lifeline. “Where is your sister?”
“Van’s singing in the choir today. Amber’s supposed to stay here, but I’m keeping an eye on her.”
“She looks a l
ot more comfortable than I feel.” He couldn’t believe he’d blurted that out.
She gave him a timid smile. “I’m glad you came. Have you met our parents, Ellen and Bill?”
“No.” He stood and shook Ellen’s and Bill’s hands. “You have wonderful daughters.”
“Thank you. We hear you have a terrific little boy,” Ellen said.
“And a powerhouse swing,” Bill added. “The team’s finally winning a few games this year.”
“Why don’t you come up and sit with us?” Ellen invited.
Just then, another family entered from the side and filed right in next to the Zobels. Nathan grinned. “Thanks, but I’m fine.” He took a seat and pretended to study the bulletin.
Nathan figured it served him right that he assumed Vanessa would be waiting to sit next to him. She probably served on a few committees and substitute taught a Sunday-school class too. He’d never met anyone with her vitality. If something needed doing, she’d be in the middle of it.
Valene and her parents were gracious, but it just wasn’t the same. He knew Van and Val were identical, but the odd thing was, he really never gave Val a second thought. Vanessa kindled something inside of him, and beside her, all other women paled to insignificance.
Shy Valene sat in front of him and dipped her head as she meditated before the service began. He’d noticed Vanessa tended to turn her face toward heaven when she prayed. She acted just as open with the Father as she did with people.
How can she trust the Lord and rely on Him so completely? Innocence? Is it just that she hasn’t been burned by life yet? God let loose a nuclear bomb in my life. Nothing’s left of my soul but a charred shell. I believe in Him, but how can I ever trust Him again?
He didn’t have much time for reflection. The worship leader got up to the microphone and welcomed everyone. He directed them to all stand and greet someone. A couple of the guys from the baseball team came over and shook his hand.
Part of Nathan liked already knowing some of the folks—it made it seem a little less foreign. On the other hand, he felt trapped. Just because he came this once, he didn’t want them to all start bugging him to show up again.
While his attention was diverted, the choir filed in. Nathan looked up and spotted Vanessa at once. She perked up and smiled at him. Best welcome I got. . . Close on the warmth of that feeling, his common sense kicked in. But this is just a onetime deal.
The pianist played a couple chords, and the choir started in. Soon, the music director had the whole congregation singing.
Funny thing, hymns. They’re classics. Never paid attention, but they can be welcoming and comforting—probably the familiarity of them. Odd, after five years, I remember almost all of the words. Two of the worship songs were new—he didn’t know the tunes, but that forced him to attend to the lyrics more closely. All in all, the music time didn’t feel too awkward.
Nathan followed the music minister’s directions to stand and sit when everyone else did. He took his seat again as an elderly couple tottered from the front row of the choir to the microphone and started to sing, “It Is Well with My Soul.” Clearly, their hearts were in the right place, but their vocal cords weren’t. Nathan never pretended to have a whole lot of talent in the music department, but even he knew they were each singing in completely different keys. To make matters worse, one of them wore a hearing aid that managed to buzz off and on. The microphone picked up the high-pitched tone and turned it into a shrill siren.
Amber stood up, right there in the center of the main aisle and started to “sing” along in howl.
“Hush!” Valene tried to silence Amber, but Amber wagged her head from side to side almost as if she were saying no. She tilted her head back and continued to howl.
Nathan glanced up at the choir and saw Vanessa’s incredulous expression. Valene glowed bright red in embarrassment as she continued to whisper very softly, “Hush, Amber. That’s enough.”
Having spent a lot of time with them, Nathan remembered the command Vanessa used on the rare occasions when Amber needed correction. He leaned forward and used her tactic. In a firm voice, pitched low enough to mean business, yet not so loud as to travel through the entire sanctuary, he said, “That’s enough.”
Immediately, Amber went quiet.
“Down,” Nathan commanded.
Amber backed up a few steps, lay down, and rested her chin on the edge of his pew. Nathan glanced up at the choir, and Vanessa mouthed, “Thank you.”
Fortunately the man in charge of the sound system managed to adjust the microphone so the duet finished without any further technical or canine embellishment. Nathan knew he’d never forget that hymn.
After the benediction, Bill Zobel turned around. “I have a hankering for Chinese. Why don’t you collect your son and meet us all at the Paper Lantern?”
“Only if he’ll promise to order something with some zing,” Vanessa declared as she walked up. “My parents and Val all have sissy mouths. I’m tired of sharing bland stuff.”
“The hotter, the better.” Nathan grinned. “But Jeff is going to be a traitor. He always wants something sweet like orange chicken.”
“My favorite!” Ellen smiled.
“See?” Vanessa groaned.
“I’ll order hot-and-spicy Hunan beef if you get firecracker shrimp or kung pao chicken.” He got a kick out of seeing how Vanessa perked up. The woman was so bright, she could masquerade as a thousand-watt lightbulb.
Val wrinkled her nose. “I’ll order beds for both of you at Community General after you burn holes in your stomachs with that stuff.”
Nathan shrugged. “If my cooking hasn’t sent me to the hospital, nothing will.”
❧
“Dad, what is the duck peeking at?”
“Peking used to be a place in China, but they changed what it’s called to Beijing,” Van explained as Nathan gave his son a baffled look. “The people at that table across from us want to try a dish that is named after the city.”
“Oh. So those people wanna eat funny stuff.” Jeff leaned closer to Vanessa. “Did you hear them? They’re getting mushy pork.”
“Mu shu pork sounds good to me.” Vanessa’s dad closed the menu. He grinned at Jeff. “It’s sort of like skinny pancakes they fill with pork. They’re good. I’ll get that, and we can try it together.”
“My dog eats pancakes. My dog and Valene’s dog are brothers. I wish I had a brother.”
The muscle in Nathan’s cheek twitched. His eyes narrowed for a split second. He took a long, deep breath, and his features smoothed. Poking his forefinger into Jeff’s ribs, he rumbled, “Oh, no. You’re enough for me. Between you and Lick, I’ve got my hands full.”
Jeff giggled and squirmed. “Lick got one of Dad’s socks today. He ran all over the house with it in his mouth.”
Nathan looked into Vanessa’s eyes. She felt her pulse speed up a bit. “See what kind of trainer you are? You swiped my socks, so now the dog’s doing it too.”
“His socks?” her mother echoed. “You swiped his socks?”
Shaking his head, Jeff blabbed, “She wore Dad’s socks. Dad and Van both had one with stripes and one that didn’t have stripes. They matched each other.”
Mom about spilled the tea she was pouring into Dad’s cup as she croaked, “How did you end up wearing his socks?”
“Vanessa talks in her sleep.” Jeff wiggled with delight. “She told me—”
Uh-oh. This is unbelievable. Damage-control time here. “Nathan had an emergency. At work. I went over—to his house, not to his work. He called me.” She knew she was babbling, but she couldn’t help herself. “Early in the morning—”
“Vanessa bailed me out of a tight spot. About a week ago, I had to dash off to a construction site, so she baby-sat Jeff for me.” Nathan finished the explanation smoothly. It didn’t escape her notice that he made it abundantly clear he hadn’t stayed in the house with her there.
Whew.
“You ready to order?” The wai
tress held her pen poised over an abused pad of paper.
“Mom?” Dad prompted.
“I heard Jeff likes orange chicken, so I’d better order something different so we’ll have an assortment. I’ll go for some sweet-and-sour ribs.”
“I’d like the mushroom chicken, please.” Val snapped the menu shut.
“Mu shu pork,” Dad added.
Jeff got up on his knees and leaned across the table. “Are those our pancakes?”
“You better believe it!”
“Goody!”
Jeff managed to give them all a rundown of his Sunday school lesson. The whole time he spoke, Nathan kept his arm around his son’s shoulders, but with his free hand, he pensively turned his teacup in slow, exacting clockwise clicks.
What is he thinking?
When the food came, Jeff changed topics. “Looky, Dad! Looky! That thing in the middle of the table is a merry-go-round!”
“It’s called a lazy Susan. We’ll all put our food on there and spin it around so anyone who wants to can have a taste. Pretty nifty, huh, Sport?”
“Can you put one in our table? It’s cool!” He turned to Vanessa. “My dad can do anything. He can make anything!”
She thought of the beautiful, old oak pedestal table she’d seen at Nathan’s house. “Your table is round like this one, but I think it would look kind of strange with a lazy Susan. It’s just right the way it is.”
“On rainy days, Consuelo puts a big blanket over it and lets me pretend it’s a tent.”
“Jeff, you need to quiet down,” Nathan said matter-of-factly. “It’s time to use your mouth to eat, not to talk.”
As she dished rice onto her plate, Val piped up. “Yeah, well, Amber wasn’t very quiet today, either. I wanted to crawl under the pew when she started in!”
Van muffled a laugh. “Nathan took care of it. And get this, Nathan: Eulla Mae and Harold came up to me in the narthex and thought it was hilarious that Amber wanted to make it a trio with them. They weren’t upset in the least.”
“Eulla Mae is gifted with grace,” Mom said.
Nathan snorted. “I’m certainly not.”
Love Is Patient Page 9
