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by Kailee Reese Samuels


  Raniero growls, “Who is your bad motherfucker, Mae?”

  She points to me and smiles at Sal with his dick perched between her lips. Her fingers twist up under his balls, and I curiously wonder the obvious as his expression changes from seductive to downright sexy as fuck. He moans, buckling over and grabbing her breast.

  In searching for the sexual freedom he has, I acknowledge I must shelve all of the notions and misgivings I may have about what anyone may think. I have to find the present. And it is that present moment that leads my finger under his chin. I pull his face close to mine, press my lips to his, and kiss him once slow. He winks quick in appreciation and points to me, giving me high marks for trying.

  His fingers grip tight into her hair as she tightens around my cock. I chase the feeling down, not letting it go and driving my point home—hard and clear. Sal jerks out of her mouth like he cannot handle the intensity of the passion any longer and spews all over her face. My angel is gorgeous covered in his come and spurs on my own salacious punting. She screams in a vow of promise and ecstasy. We are so high on each other as we collapse in a heap surrounding Amber.

  His lessons don’t stop as I watch his fingers rub and knead her scalp. I follow suit in the aftercare I have all too often omitted carelessly—and never given to this extreme. And it is – there – in that moment after the all the orgasms are had where I find the journey isn’t over, and we find an intimacy of limitless bounds and overpowering love. Sal glistens with sweat as I notice the tears in his eyes. He is emotional and makes no apologies for showing it. It’s fucking sexy as hell to see Amber’s response to it, and I know I need to work towards giving her that much trust.

  “I love you guys so much,” Amber chirps giddily.

  “I love you babygirl,” I add, kissing her lips.

  Sal kisses her cheek and sends her off with his own variety of well wishes. “Be fucking good.” He doesn’t need to say he loves her because she already knows. Reaching across her body, Sal strokes his hand across my cheek and down to my chin. “You touched my fucking dick, Hoss.”

  “I did,” I boast proudly. “And I totally get it, now. Thanks, man.”

  He closes his eyes and nods. “My pleasure. Use your powers wisely, friend.”

  “If I don’t…”

  Sal interrupts, “If you don’t—I will kick your ass for touching my dick and not learning the goddamned lesson.”

  “Yes, Sir,” I wink and flip him the bird. He erupts in laughter. The moment is surreal as I am an older student of the young Master. I am 42; he is 25. And he gets this shit like no one’s business. Thankfully, he got the joke as we all drift off to a place of harmony and peace. It is good. So good.

  * * * *

  I canceled the last week of the shoot at work, shutting the whole thing down. I interviewed Celeste and the poon. Riktor was his name. They had been nothing more than bystanders, not innocent by any means, but they had nothing to do with Amber’s kidnapping.

  The whole thing was my fault. When the call came four days in, I immediately understood Amber was nothing more than a casualty of a war she had no business being in.

  I knew who had her, and I knew why. Weeks ago, I made the move, sending a hitman after her bastard stepdad, Scuz. Somehow he managed to lay low and avoid the bullet. Last week, we finally called it off. He tried to rape her, and sooner or later, he would die.

  Despite my firing of Celeste, she called with information. Amber’s sister, Evie, wanted to talk to me. She was in the big house, and how she found out about her sister’s abduction was anyone’s guess. The system worked the same everywhere, someone knew someone and somehow Evie found out. She got word to her attorney, who messaged my now former assistant.

  “Call and book us a charter flight, car, and hotel to Arkansas ASAP,” I instructed as if Celeste were still on the payroll.

  She picked up the ball like nothing changed between us. “You got it, champ!”

  By late afternoon, we were walking into the maximum level penitentiary with my lawyer. We were lucky enough to have a private room for one hour with Evie Rosen. I was never a nervous type, but sitting and waiting for her, my palms began to sweat. When the door opened up and the guard ushered her in, I don’t know what I was expecting, but she certainly wasn’t it.

  Yolanda Evelyn “Evie” Rosen appeared before us like the worn out twin of Amber. With dark hair and eyes, Evie looked washed up. Like I expected Amber to look after a couple years doing porn or hardcore drugs. The reality before me changed everything despite how I knew Evie had her own story. But that moment shifted my perspective as I started thinking less about what I could take and more about what I could give.

  I bargained with God that day in the prison. If you give me back Amber unharmed, I would see to her safety, including getting her away from me. I knew I wasn’t a safe choice for her. She would push me for more pain, and I would give in. For one, I would have done anything for her. And two, I was a sadist—although I never knew to what extent until she appeared in my life. If it hadn’t been for her, I probably never would have known. I wasn’t a pusher in the dungeon; I relished in the glory of a woman allowing me the honor of taking leather to her hide. What Amber did was even more substantial.

  She was rare.

  And I knew it.

  “Hi, you wanted to speak to me?”

  “Yeah,” she said, rubbing her dried and cracked lips together. “I wanted to tell you where she is.”

  I moved closer in my chair, sitting on the edge. “You know where Amber is?”

  “Yeah. She is with Scuz and his pack,” she informed. “You got a smoke?” I handed her one and lit it. She exhaled and continued, “You can’t just walk in there or they are going to mow your ass down.”

  “So how do you suggest I get inside?”

  “If you go to my safe deposit box, there is a bunch of paper work and a key. You take everything out of the box, leave nothing behind. Because after they know what I did, there is a good chance I am going to end up dead in here.”

  “We can try and get you put in solitary for protection,” my lawyer offered. “I’ll have to speak with the warden.”

  “Offer whatever you need,” I whispered to him. “Continue Evie.”

  “She’s at The Bunker,” she exhaled. “Do you have a pen and paper?”

  Handing over both, I watched her scribble an address down along with a map. “Can I ask why you are doing this?”

  She snarled with the same expression Amber had when she disappeared into the woods. “It is simple really. Scuz framed me. I didn’t fucking kill Jimbo. He did. And Amber is my only sister. So when I tell you to leave no trace of whatever you do, I mean it. The paperwork in the safety deposit box will clear my name, but it will completely destroy my sister. So you decide if your are going to use it or not.”

  “Jimbo was going after Scuz for his relationship with you.”

  Evie laughed, “Jimbo wasn’t coming after anyone. He wouldn’t have hurt a flea. All he ever wanted was to get high and party.” She thumbed another cigarette out of the pack, chain-smoking off the last one. “Scuz murdered Jimbo because he found out we were blood,” she exhaled. “He was my fucking brother.”

  “And you were sleeping with him?”

  “Yeah, well I didn’t know it at the time. He appeared out of nowhere when I was still in high school. He was a nice guy, older than me, good looking. He didn’t know either. Scuz got his hands on the paperwork and showed me. He didn’t want Jimbo coming after my mother’s vast amount of cash or some shit. I mean that trailer…”

  I could see the fires flickering in her eyes like there was more. “What else Evie?”

  Biting her lip, she looked down. “My mother traded.”

  “Traded what?” I demanded.

  “I’ve said enough,” she snarled again, shaking her head.

  Slamming my fist into the desk, I raged. “Tell me what you fucking know! Stop playing games with me! Stop talking in circles! Your sister is i
n real danger!”

  “Before Scuz took over, mom ran with the one of the opposing gangs. One of her best friends was pregnant when she was, and really needed a son for her old man, the leader of Rampage,” she said with a stoic shrug. “My mom had that.”

  “What did she give her, Evie?” I already knew the answer, but I needed to hear it. “Tell me.”

  “Amber.”

  AMBER

  THE POST HAZE bliss tucks a smile upon my heart. With Sal on one side and Dale on the other, I have never been so happy. Under the white sheet, Sal is curled up on my body, his tanned skin setting off my porcelain. D’s arm is beneath my head, providing me a pillow. His pale skin is several shades lighter than mine with hints of red hair all over his body. He is my heat, my devil in disguise.

  I understand last night will likely be the last time I ever sleep with Raniero, and I am okay with that if I walk away with the big oaf next to me. I need Dale Archer in my life. I am merely existing without him. Sal will be fine. Although I know he cares, he’s a player, searching for his next hit. I can no longer serve as his backup plan. I cannot be his drug when no one else is available. We both understand the rules, and he and I are solid. Sal will always be my person even if he cannot be my Dom.

  Dale wakes up first and smiles at me sleepily. He kisses my lips and heads off to take a piss. Pretty boy stirs and snuggles up against my body not wanting to get out of bed yet. I want everyone happy. One big happy fucked up family.

  I can hear Dale in kitchen making coffee. The beans grind and the water comes on. Sal will complain it isn’t strong enough. He’s right, but I won’t say a word. I am worried about saying goodbye to Sal today, I am afraid it may actually hurt.

  I close my eyes not ready to deal with the emotions. I know I will have to at some point, but right now is not the time. Pushing the pain away, I am aware this is how I have survived my whole life and why I am the way I am. I have become so cold I cannot melt unless my skin is aflame.

  The phone rings and I hear Dale talking loudly. “What do you mean, Rach?”

  Sal shoots up out of bed and grabs his jeans. He is putting them on when Dale comes to the door. Tangled in the white sheet, I sit up concerned and worried.

  “Kid?”

  “What’s up?”

  “You got your gear?”

  “Ya, Hoss. Why?”

  “Oliver is dead. Mom is in the hospital with two gun shot wounds.”

  “Holy fuck!” I scream. “We have to go!”

  “And they have Mae.”

  “What the hell do they want with a baby?”

  “Pock wants to exchange his daughter for mine.”

  Running his hand through his hair, Sal closes his eyes. The moment is brief though as he continues getting dressed. He heads inside the closet and begins tossing me clothes. “Get dressed.”

  “What is happening, Sal?”

  “Amber, get the fuck dressed.” My feet hit the ground but I am in shock and I don’t understand what is happening. Like I am caught on a ride that I don’t know. Serene’s clothes fit me just right as I pull on the tan jeans. Sal chunks a bra and tank top at me. I put them both on, along with the oversized white sweater.

  “Come on, Hoss,” Sal says, pounding Dale in the chest. “We gotta go.”

  Sal returns to the closet, thumping shoes around and looking for something. He emerges carrying an expensive looking pair of brown riding boots. “They may be small, but try.”

  I shove them on my feet and sit on the bed. Archer is standing motionless, completely frozen in time as Sal runs about doing the work of ten men. Before I know it, he’s thrown a large black case on the bed. He fumbles the lock and opens it up only to reveal a small arsenal. “Oh Jesus….fuck.”

  “You want a vest on her, Hoss?”

  Dale says nothing, but his eyes blink around the room, his first sign of life in ten minutes. I watch in awe as Sal proceeds to peel his jeans down and strap multiple weapons to his body. As he is fastening them, I ask, “What is happening, Sally? Talk to me.”

  “No,” Dale scolds. “Yes, but one of the thinner ones she can wear under the tank and get a blade or two on her somewhere. No bangs for beautiful.”

  “Aye Aye, Cap’n,” Sal charms, strapping a vest to his chest.

  “Sally… help me….” I whisper, unable to breathe. I am panicking. Kneeling before me, Dale touches my cheek. “Babygirl, I need you to listen to me. Focus on me.”

  “What’s happening, D?”

  “Pock has my baby. And we are going to go get her.”

  “Who is…. the exchange?”

  “You are.”

  “Pock,” I mutter and bite my lips, feeling the tears run down my cheeks.

  “Amber, I need you to listen to me and focus. If there was ever a time for you to shut off your emotions, now is it. Turn them off baby. Shut them down. We are going to use you as bait, but I promise you—Raniero and I are going to get your ass outta there. I need you to trust us completely.”

  Sal appears by my side. “I need to…” he says, holding the gear.

  “Go for it.”

  Dale is holding my knees as Sal is stripping my sweater off and attaching a vest to me. “How…”

  “I will explain everything after we get Mae. Right now, all you need to know is you are Jerry ‘Pock’ Allen’s daughter, Amber.”

  “I am Amber Allen?” I ask. “He’s a drug dealer who lives in a god damned mansion. He’s the leader of Rampage MC. And he didn’t – fucking – want me because I didn’t have a dick?”

  “Not him,” Sal offers, chewing on a piece of gum and dressing me. The smell of mint permeates my senses as I stare at his face in close proximity to my own. His jaw is tense and his eyes are an emerald black, he’s pissed in a way I have never seen. “His bitch. She had two girls already. She wanted to give him a son. Your mom – his bitch – traded you.”

  “For Jimbo?” I laugh.

  “Jimmy Rosen, half brother to Evie, we don’t have DNA on his dad and we might never know, considering,” Sal informs. “Where are they meeting us, Hoss?”

  Dale’s eyes flare to mine holding a pain so deep it is like he cannot speak. “D? Tell me. Where?”

  He quips back, “Are you sufficiently in ice princess-mode?”

  “I am getting cold.” I mumble. “Now, where?”

  “In the same place they held you before.”

  My face flinches as I try and hold back the emotions of that week. The week that ended my life with Cyclone Blonde.”

  I ask, “How long have you known Dale?”

  “Does it matter?”

  “It matters because I want to get out of this with the man I deserved fifteen years ago,” I argue.

  Glancing at Sal and back to me, Dale rubs his face with his hand, reluctant to tell me anything. He closes his eyes and shakes his head like the pain of the truth is just too much to handle. His hands reach for my knees, but I scoot away.

  Glancing up to Sal, I see the paralyzing shock on his face. He didn’t know Dale’s hidden lies until now either. I cannot call them his truth because they aren’t. I cannot call them his secrets because they aren’t. He has been blatantly lying to me for fifteen years, all in the name of protecting me. The guarding as he would call it is the reason I have an emotional condom in the first place. If I knew the truth, maybe I would never have felt the need to force my pain whore to the surface.

  “Did you know before or after the club abused… and humiliated… and raped me… keeping me for fucking days?”

  A sigh escapes my lips as the body language between the two men gives all the answer I need to know. I burst out from between them in a blaze of anger and pain. I am hot and out of control as I head for the bedroom door. “You’ve known for fifteen years that fucking Pock was my real dad and you never said anything to me?”

  “I found out during your capture… But Amber, we didn’t talk…”

  Turning around, I shout, “Does it matter if we were talking? Don’
t you think I should have known? Don’t you think you should have mentioned it?”

  His jaw throbs and his eyes swell with tears, but the bastard says nothing. Sal is pissed, his carriage confident and intimidating.

  My face wears an uncaring expression, shutting down everything they recovered last night. “The funny thing is Dale, you thought I could handle all that physical shit like a fucking dozer because I liked it rough, but that’s where you are wrong. I had to bury any and every emotion I had left. The only time I ever got to feel again was if someone could crack through the numbness with pain. We – are – through.”

  Leaving them behind, I hear Sal blow up with a threatening, arrogant tone. “How the fuck could you do that?”

  “I didn’t have a choice.”

  “You always have a fucking choice,” Sal yells as I hear the thunderous crash into the wall. “You chose fucking wrong!”

  Quietly, I grab the keys to the motorcycle, and I am gone like a rogue eclipsed in the shadows. They aren’t the only ones who can play this game.

  four

  ACT IV

  WE DROVE ALL NIGHT. Wedged between Toothless and Husky, I tried to stay awake. Husky was nice enough to throw his hoodie over my body. It was temporary reprieve. I knew it would only be a matter of time before these men uncaged their demons on me.

  We stopped for gas in Little Rock. They pushed me onto the floorboard, but it wouldn’t have mattered if the police saw me. I didn’t matter. No one was looking for a girl like me. I was nothing more than an insignificant blip in a long line of trash. Girls like me didn’t get saved.

  And there was no way in hell Cy had said a word.

  An hour later, the sun had started to rise up, giving everything a dull grey hue. The moment between the light of day and the dark of night served as a final warning sign for the beasts to choose their side.

  With the forest nearby, I recognized home as we pulled to a stop at an industrial building. I should have found comfort in it, instead home scared the shit out of me. We pulled up in an abandoned part of town. That part existed for the vagrants and addicts and seedy types, and even girls like me didn’t cross that bridge unless we wanted to become one of them. They were society’s vampires, sucking one in at a time. Just like they had done Evie.

 

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