Aubrey waved from the shop, hung up the phone, and then headed our way. Marie and Aubrey greeted each other and Marie introduced Talon, then I showed them the clubhouse. In the bar area, a few guys sat drinking a beer. Little Titty Rhonda was behind the bar, and she leaned forward laughing at the guys. I introduced them to everyone.
“Ye want something to drink?” I asked.
“Coke,” Talon shrugged.
“It’s pretty early. What about a Bloody Mary?” Marie asked biting her lip. I nodded to Little Titty Rhonda and said, “Get my girls a coke and a Bloody Mary”
“Your girls, huh? No, problem, Mickey.”
“Hey, I’m Rhonda.” Marie said hello, and I handed Talon her coke and a bunch of singles for the jukebox.
“Ye can play pool if ye want, and then we can finish the tour.”
“Awesome,” Talon moved to the jukebox and flipped through the selections.
“It’s nice.” Marie’s eyes moved around the bar and then took a sip of her drink, and grinned. “Nice and spicy!” She nodded to Rhonda, and they shared silent appreciation for a great drink.
“Wait until ye see the kitchen.” I smiled, and I couldn't help it. I was proud of what we had here and proud to be showing Marie. I cared what she thought, and I’d never given two shits what a woman thought about this place before. Not that I brought tons of women here. I liked to keep it outside of the club. I didn’t want the lasses to get the wrong impression, but Marie was different.
Tiny, who was still not tiny – at all, came through the front door of the clubhouse. I’d heard his pipes as he rolled up and expected to see him. “You seen my boys? he bellowed, “They were supposed to cut the grass this morning.”
“They were playing ball when we got here,” I told him and watched as he moved as fast as he could to go yell at the boys. I shook my head. Those nephews were going to give him a coronary.
“You’ve been with these guys a long time?” Marie asked, even though I knew she knew I had.
“Most of my life, it seems. Ireland was a long time ago.”
“Do you ever miss it? Ireland that is.”
“I miss my country. I miss the green. It’s green here, but it’s not the same. I guess that’s why I like the lake. I don’t miss the shite that was happening there. It’s calmed down a lot since I left, but it was bad, and my home life was nothing to sneeze at either. My sister is there. Sometimes, I wonder what she’s like, but it’s not my place any longer.”
“Would you ever go back home?”
“Dis, right here. Dis is my home. Maybe one day I’ll return to see the sea, with the right person dat is.” I stroked her hand and thought about how beautiful she would look against that emerald country with her blazing red locks. I couldn’t see myself with anyone else there; riding around the hillside with Marie behind me, now that was a daydream I could get behind.
“I’ve always wanted to go.” Marie bit her lip and looked shy.
“Maybe one day, then.” I bent forward and kissed the corner of her mouth. Her face turned a bright red, and I wondered what she was thinking. Talon had picked out a few songs on the jukebox, and I was glad that it wasn’t some old-school rap shit that my daughter would’ve chosen.
“Avenged Sevenfold,” Lou who was drinking at the bar called out, “Now, that's music I can get behind.” Talon beamed at the old man’s approval, then moved to the pool table and racked up some balls.
“Why don’t you play with her?” I suggested to Marie.
“Really?”
“Yeah, when’s the last time ye just played together?”
Marie thought about this for a quick second, and once she realized she couldn't answer me, she joined her daughter. I watched them play two games, and God dammit. The way Marie looked as she bent over the damn table to make a shot was driving me fecking mad. I’d had half a mind to drag her back to my room, but I couldn’t, not with Talon here, but damned if I didn't want to. I finished the tour.
Rhonda made a few sandwiches for us, and we sat and ate. Talon, I learned, had her mother's wit. The two were more alike than they realized. Not once the entire time that Marie was in the clubhouse did it seem like she had any nerves. In fact, she seemed to fit in, and it was odd, but I knew she would. She looked like she was in her element here, and I liked it.
Chapter Nineteen
Marie
“My abuser used threats of violence against my family to control me. I remember feeling like I was stuck and I just wanted to protect everyone. I didn't want anyone else to get hurt because of me. It took me a long time to realize that it wasn’t my fault, or because of anything I did.”
I was at a group meeting at the women’s shelter. Aubrey had been persuading me to try one. She said hearing other women’s stories helped her feel less alone. I was shocked when Jenny began to share her story with the room. We were alike in so many ways.
Aubrey interjected, “A lot of times our abusers will do this, and somehow we take on their behavior and blame ourselves. There is nothing anyone of you could ever have done to deserve a man putting his hands on you. I don't care if you cheated, or used drugs, or stole.
Even if you were not an ideal citizen or girlfriend, there is never a reason that a man abusing you is your fault. I want you all to think about how you take on blame, and I want you to believe that it wasn’t your fault.”
Aubrey finished the meeting, and a couple of toddlers ran into the room and climbed on their mother’s lap. She didn’t look much older than eighteen. The mother looked exhausted. One of the kids cried that they were hungry, and the other said that they had to go potty. I offered to help her, and she looked grateful. By the time I returned from the restroom, a lot of the women had cleared out of the large great room.
The shelter was an inconspicuous house that provided refuge to women and children in need. I learned that the Devil’s Crusaders had taken it upon themselves to drive by several times a day and to make sure everything was copacetic. The police often did drive-bys as well. There was a sense of security here.
Aubrey and Jenny, I was learning, had been through so much. They both seemed so together. It gave me hope that I could be together. I sat and had coffee with the women, but was mostly quiet and reflective.
Serenity, Jenny’s little girl, began to cry and get antsy. “I think it’s time for her nap. I better get going,” Jenny said, grabbing her diaper bag.
“Call me later,” Aubrey said, and I smiled and said goodbye.
“That was pretty intense,” I told Aubrey once Jenny had left.
“It’s a lot to take in. You okay?”
“Yeah, I think I just need to sit with everything for a while.”
“I understand. Call me if you want to talk, alright?” I gave her a quick hug and left.
I drove home, and after I parked, I immediately went to the small dock. I thought about everything that I’d heard. It didn’t matter that I was young and dumb, or that I forgave him after he strangled me. He had no right to hit me. I thought about how sometimes I’d reflect on that first time he hurt me. Since I forgave him, I often felt like I somehow made the rest of his abuse acceptable. It made me feel guilty, and I realized how I needed to let go of some of that guilt. I thought about the last beating Drake dished out, and that it wasn't my fault that there were dishes in the sink. Even if it was, even if they were piled high, he had no right to touch me. I had to also work on forgiving myself. There was a lot that I was feeling.
I’m not sure how long I sat there. I didn't even feel the cold seeping into my bones, as the air around me chilled. A slight fog rolled over the lake, and I wondered if it would rain.
As usual, I didn't hear Mickey as he approached. He placed a blanket over my shoulders. “Ye alright, love?”
I looked up at him and realized that I’d been crying. I didn’t need to hide my tears. I was freely exposing myself to Mickey. He brushed the tears away and sat behind me, pulling me in close to his chest, his legs stretched on both si
des of me. After several quiet minutes, Mickey asked, “What’s happened?”
“I went to a group meeting for victims of abuse, and it gave me a lot to think about.” I didn't say anything else, and Mickey didn't have to say anything either. He just sat with me for a long time holding me. I found comfort in the silence. I found comfort in Mickey.
“SHOTS!” MAURA YELLED. We were in the clubhouse. It was my first clubhouse party, and Maura had come into town for the night. Her husband, who was some gigantic Marine, stayed pretty close to her side all night long.
Talon was staying over Jenny’s mom’s house. They had met a few times and seemed to do well together, and they were watching Serenity for Jenny and Jules.
“None for me,” Jenny said rubbing her belly.
“I know,” Maura laughed, “How about you Aub? Daws?” Aubrey shook her head no, and Daws gave a subtle chin lift.
“Marie! What do you say? Are you a tequila or whiskey kinda gal?”
“I’ll drink whatever,” I said shrugging my shoulders.
“Dad? Whiskey?” Mickey nodded, and Maura was set on her shot-mission. Mickey was close by my side, and he whispered into my ear, “We’re staying here tonight, love. I told Corbin he and Maura could have my place, but I want to feck ye here. I want anytime I go into my room to imagine my cock slamming into ye.”
Fuck, his words turned me on. I angled toward him and kissed his neck, then pressed my breasts against his chest. I swore he emitted a low growl that I felt deep in my core.
I moved to his ear and whispered back, “I'll fuck you anywhere, anyway, you want me.” Mickey’s nose flared, and I heard a sharp intake of breath.
“Marie, hope you like a snakebite.” Maura broke Mickey and my trance. She began to pass out shots. “Dad, toast!”
Mickey’s eyes danced, as he looked to me, “To getting all the things ye want, and everything ye need. To knowing when ye’ve had enough, and when to fecking scream!” He laughed and raised his glass; everyone clinked them together.
I gulped mine back and would’ve gladly gone back to Mickey’s room right then and there, but Maura grabbed my hand. “Come on, Marie! Let’s dance!”
I didn't really want to dance, but this was Mickey’s daughter, and I wanted to get to know her. She dragged me away from Mickey, and I didn't protest. She was fun. She was wild. I could definitely tell a bunch of bikers raised her. Overall, she was awesome.
I’m not sure where all the shots came from, it almost seemed magical. I was swaying my hips and then somehow a small shot glass would end up in my hand. I was laughing and sweating. It was the most carefree I’d felt in a long time.
Maura stopped dancing, and I heard her yell, “Hey, bimbette! Stop gawking at my husband!”
Corbin did a come-hither thing with his finger, and Maura went to him. I took it as my cue to get water and cool off. Big Titty Rhonda was behind the bar and served me quickly. She apparently was different than the other Rhonda because of the size of her tits. Meh—bikers!
“Ye having a good time?” Mickey asked, as he met me at the bar.
“I am. I’m a little drunk though.” I laughed.
“I see dat,” he grinned.
“What about you? You’ve had maybe as many shots as me.”
“Aye, but whiskey runs through my veins.”
I laughed again. “Your accent's hot!” I blurted, and realized that those snake bites were leaving me uninhibited. Mickey chuckled. “Your club is fun. Nothing is too crazy. I don't feel like I have to watch my back, when I’m here. It’s a nice surprise.”
“Were ye worried?”
“I didn’t know what to think. Maura’s fun, too. It seems like you did a good job with her. I like her.” I scrunched up my nose, because it tickled a little. “I like you.” I blurted. Yep, no filter tonight.
Mickey laughed, and this wasn't just a chuckle, but a throw your head, back belly rumble. I loved it. I made eye contact with Maura who saw it too, and she threw an enormous smile my way.
Once Mickey stopped laughing, he said, “Glad ye like me. I like ye a feck of a lot. Are ye too drunk to get out of here? Watching ye dance has been killing me.”
“Lead the way, Irishman.” We said a quick goodnight to Maura and her husband. At that point, no one else mattered. I didn't care who we missed. I was about to get drunk fucked by Mickey, and I was beyond excited.
His room was dark as we entered, with a small amount of light shining in. He locked the door behind us, and I was shocked at how quiet it was in here. I watched him as he turned on a small bedside light.
“How come you can’t hear the party?”
“Maura was here a lot when she was little, so I had soundproofing put in a long time ago.”
“Makes sense.”
“Marie.”
“Yes?”
“Come here! No more talking. I need ye.”
The words struck me, even in my drunken state. He needed me. How could a man like him need me? But he did. I could see it in the way he watched me. He looked hungry, and often while I danced, I felt like I was just waiting to be devoured by him. He was starved.
I didn’t wait. I whipped off my shirt taking my bra with it, letting my breasts bounce free.
“Jesus, those are the best fecking breasts I’ve ever seen.”
Mickey took his boots off, but never took his eyes off of me.
“I got scars, Mickey, but you never seem to see them when you stare at me. Why is that?”
“Chatty,” he laughed, then his face got soft as he answered. “I don’t see your scars. All I see is your beauty.”
“How can you not see them?” Okay, he was right, I couldn't seem to shut up.
“I know they’re there, but to me, they’re more like a map. They tell me that the road you’ve traveled hasn’t been an easy one, but look at you; my lioness so fierce. So fecking sexy.”
I went to Mickey, crashing my lips against his. I thought we were going to have a wild drunk fucking, but it wasn't that. It was so much more than that. He was slow. He took his time. He brought me to the brink again and again, until finally we both crashed, and it may have been one of the sweetest fucking landings that I’d ever had.
Chapter Twenty
Mickey
“Shit, Mickey! That! Keep doing that. I’m about to... Gah!”
“That’s it, Marie. Take it, love. Take all of it.” She reared back against me. Her tight arse sucked my cock, pulsating around me. My fingers were deep in her pussy and were drenched. This was the second orgasm I pulled from her.
“Oh, God. Your dick in my ass feels so good.”
“Love it when ye talk dirty. I’m getting close. Can you take it if I go deep and fast in your arse, or do ye want me to finish in yer pussy?”
“Yes,” she panted rearing back at me. She was wild.
Sometimes in our everyday life, she seemed timid and shy. She had moments where she appeared beaten down still, but when we were naked, it was like she had no abandon. It made me crazy. It made me addicted. I pushed her head downwards to the mattress, gripped her hips hard and gave it my all. I pumped in her tight hole over and over again. The way my cock looked pumping in and out of her milky white flesh was one of the sexiest things I’d seen in my entire life.
She moaned, loving it. That sound was my undoing. I came hard and long. It felt like the greatest gift, an wave of pleasure only Marie could give to me. When I finished I bent over her, cradled my body to her and popped free.
I pulled her close to my body. She was spent. To be honest, I was, too.
Marie had worked tonight, and we didn't get back here until almost two and had been spending nearly every night together. Talon was staying overnight with Jenny, for the first time. It had been weeks since I’d talked with Talon, and her attitude towards her mother and me seemed to be improving. She was taking it in stride. She was excited when she found out I had a couple of sheds filled with toys. ATVs, dirt bikes, Wave Runners... you name it, I probably had it. I was
going to teach her how to ride a dirt bike. I wasn't surprised that was what she wanted to learn to ride.
She reminded me of my daughter in a lot of ways. She was stubborn, too. She wouldn’t let Zeke back in. I kept telling him patience and kindness were the key. If he wanted her to trust him, he had to show her he was reliable.
“Mmm, I’m sleepy,” Marie mumbled.
“Sleep, love. Tomorrow's a big day.”
“How can I forget? What if...”
“Hush, don't let anything else stress ye out. It will all be alright. You’ll see. They’ll love ye. They’re good people.” She was worried about meeting everyone. Even though we'd had a party at the clubhouse, she was going to be exposed to everyone.
“I don't think I could keep my eyes open for another minute, if I tried.” Marie yawned. I held her tight. It felt like the closer she was to me when she slept, and the more exhausted she was, the less likely she was to have a nightmare. They weren’t happening every night, and that was progress. I kissed the back of her head, and felt my own eyes drift closed.
A phone ringing roused me from my sleep. It was barely light out, and luckily Marie was still sleeping. I grabbed the phone and rushed from the room.
“Aye,” I answered the phone half asleep.
“We got a lead.” It was Jules.
“I’ll be right there.” I hung up my phone, and shrugged on my jeans.
Marie stirred, “Mickey? What is it?”
“Club shit. Not a big deal. Go back to sleep.” I kissed her on her head. She sat up, and her breasts fell heavy against the blanket.
“Mickey, it’s the middle of the night.”
“It’s fine. I’ll bring breakfast back.”
“You sure?”
“Love, I have to go.” I grabbed a piece of her hair and wound the curl around my finger, then left. I threw on my hoodie and patch, and got on my bike. The weather had been beautiful the last few days and was uncharacteristically warm. I rode to the clubhouse where Jules, Daws, Jarrod and a few other brothers were pulling up on their bikes. We went inside. The entire club wasn't present; we’d gather them all, depending on what Jules had to say.
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