Bryn nodded. “I did at first. It’s been so long since I’ve kissed anyone but Paul, and it felt really nice. But then I stopped. And I told him we couldn’t do that.”
“Why not?” Corrie asked. “You’re single. He’s about to be single. You obviously care about each other.”
“He’s not single yet. And he still loves Wendy. He told me so.”
“Ah,” Corrie said. “That does make things complicated.”
“I can’t be his rebound,” Bryn said. “I just couldn’t take that.”
“You care about him, don’t you?” Corrie asked. “Not just like a friend. You have feelings for him.”
Bryn hesitated, her cheeks red. “Maybe,” she said. “I don’t know.”
“Well, either way, it’s time for you to move out.” Corrie hugged her friend. “I’ll talk to Mark and get the money stuff figured out, and let’s take this house.”
“Thanks.” Bryn smiled at her. “That sounds really good.”
Two weeks later, they were ready to move in. Corrie hired a mover to pack and move her things. Bryn packed a single suitcase. The baby things her mother had bought were already in the car.
“You know you don’t have to go.” Bob sat on the bed in Bryn’s room, watching her pack.
“I know,” she said. “You’ve been so great, Bob. I can’t tell you how much I appreciate your letting me stay for so long.”
“Is it because of the kiss?” He watched her carefully. “Because I promise that won’t happen again.”
“No,” she said, closing the suitcase. “I just . . . look, being here has been great, almost like we’ve been playing house. But now, it’s time for us, for me, to get on with the real world. I need my own place. And you need some time to figure out what’s next for you.”
He sighed.
“I’m only going a few blocks,” she said, smiling at him. “And you guys are coming for dinner tonight, right?”
“I know,” he said. “I’m being selfish. I’m just going to miss you. And so are the boys.”
“You guys will be fine. I’m sure they’re ready to have their house back.”
“I think they’re going to miss you.”
“Well, I’m only a few blocks away.” She picked up the suitcase and surveyed the room that had been her home since September.
“I really do appreciate everything you’ve done for me.”
Bob rose and wrapped his arms around her. “It’s been fun.”
“Okay.” Bryn stepped away from him. “So we’ll see you guys tonight at six for pizza and unpacking.”
She walked to the front door and hesitated for just an instant. Then she dropped her key on the entry table and left.
47
“My God, Corrie! How is all this stuff going to fit?”
Bryn stood in the doorway of the bungalow, staring at the furniture crowding the living room and spilling onto the porch. Boxes sat stacked against the walls. Framed pictures leaned precariously against the door.
“I know.” Corrie smiled at her from the dining room. “I brought too much.”
Bryn shoved her way into the living room and dropped her suitcase onto the floor.
“Well, some of it is going upstairs, right? That will give us some more room.”
Corrie sat down on a large box.
“Actually, the stuff that’s going upstairs is already there.”
“Okay, that’s everything.” A man walked down the stairs, carrying empty boxes.
“Thank you,” said Corrie, rising. She reached into her purse and pulled out some cash.
“Do you want us to move anything around down here?” The man looked from Bryn’s pregnant belly to Corrie’s and smiled.
“Um, no. I think we’ll be okay.” Corrie handed him the money. “We have some friends coming later to help.”
“Well, don’t try to move that by yourselves.” The man pointed to a huge sideboard in the center of the room.
“We won’t, I promise.”
Another man appeared from upstairs, carrying more boxes.
“The beds are set up,” he said. “So at least you’ll have someplace to sleep tonight.”
The movers left, carrying still more empty boxes as they went.
“Why didn’t you let them put everything where you want it?” Bryn asked, staring forlornly at the moving van as it pulled away.
“I don’t know where I want anything.”
Corrie waved her arm at the room. “Where do you think everything should go?”
“You’re asking me?” Bryn laughed. “You’re the one with the designer show house.”
“Designer being the key.” Corrie slumped onto a box. “I had a designer tell me where to put everything before. I don’t have a clue about design.”
“Okay then.” Bryn set her shoulders and stared around the room. “Let’s start with the couch over here.”
They shoved furniture around the living room until they had a small seating area facing the fireplace, then sat on the couch surveying their progress.
“That would look nice over the mantle.” Bryn pointed to a large Degas print.
“Mark got me that for Christmas the first year we were married.” Corrie smiled at the memory. “We’d just gone to the museum in Chicago and I fell in love with that painting, so he got me a print.”
They sat quietly for a minute, each wrapped in thought.
“Okay, enough.” Bryn stood and pulled Corrie up by her hand. “Let’s start on the dining room.”
By the time Bob arrived with the boys, the house was beginning to resemble a home.
“Pizza’s here!” he called.
“Oh thank God!” Bryn appeared from the kitchen, towel in hand. “We’re starving!”
“This is nice,” Bob said, looking around the room. “Where’s the rest of this stuff going to go?”
“I have no idea,” Bryn said. “That won’t fit anywhere.” She pointed at the sideboard. “And the rest . . .” She plopped down on the couch and threw her hands in the air.
“The rest you’ll find room for or get rid of. Meantime, let’s eat.”
Bob set the pizzas on the dining room table.
“Micah, do you have the sodas?”
Micah stood with Cody in the living room, staring solemnly at them.
“Is this where you’re going to live now?” he asked, looking at Bryn.
“Yep,” she said. “What do you think?”
“Why aren’t you gonna live with us anymore?” Cody asked.
“I told you, honey. It’s time for me to get a place of my own, a place for me and my baby.”
Micah walked into the dining room and set two large bottles of soda on the table.
“You know you don’t have to go,” he said, staring at Bryn earnestly. “My mom can’t make you move out.”
Bryn knelt down and put her arms around the boy. “I know, Micah. It’s not because of your mom. It’s just . . . time. I loved staying with you guys. But we always knew it wasn’t forever, right?”
He said nothing, just leaned into her and buried his face in her neck.
Then Bryn felt another small pair of arms around her as Cody joined the embrace. Tears stung her eyes.
“Hey, guys,” Bob said. “You’ll still see Bryn all the time. You know that, right?”
“That’s what you said about Mommy.” Cody’s voice was muffled against Bryn’s shoulder.
“Hey!” Corrie came down the stairs, carrying a broom and dustpan. “When did you guys get here?”
“Just now,” Bob said, grinning at her. “Looks like you two have been busy.”
“Yeah, but we’ve got a lot to do.”
“The first thing we need to do is eat!” Bryn stood, gently untangling herself from the boys.
“That sounds like a very good idea. I’ll find some paper plates.” Corrie disappeared into the kitchen.
“I’ll get cups.” Bryn followed her.
“Are you okay?” Corrie whispered.
/> Bryn nodded. “I didn’t know it would be so hard to leave them,” she said.
Corrie squeezed her hand. “It’s for the best.”
“I know.”
After dinner, Corrie and the boys sat on the kitchen floor, unwrapping dishes and pans and cutlery and putting them into neat piles.
“So, give me the grand tour.” Bob smiled at Bryn. “Where are you and the baby going to sleep?”
“We’re upstairs,” she said, leading him toward the steps.
“Here’s mine.” She opened a door and waved him into a pretty room, wallpapered in yellow with white curtains. “The furniture is all Corrie’s, from her guest room. I’ve never had such nice stuff.”
“It’s nice.” Bob walked around the room. “I like the quilt.”
“That’s Corrie’s, too.”
“Well, at least you don’t have to go out and buy everything at once.”
“And this is for the baby!” She opened a second door.
The room was pale blue, again with white curtains. The port-a-crib and swing sat in boxes on the floor, beside a huge bag of baby clothes.
“Are you leaving it blue?” Bob asked.
“I think so. I like the color really well.”
“What if you’re having a girl?”
“Then she’ll like blue!”
Bob laughed.
“If you need a crib, I’ve still got the one the boys used. It’s in pretty good shape.”
“Thanks,” she said, smiling. “My mom said she wants to buy one, and a changing table. She really has gone mad over this grandma thing.”
“That’s good,” he said. “This is nice, a nice room for a baby.”
They walked back downstairs.
“Okay, so you’ve seen all this.” Bryn waved around the living room. “And here’s Corrie’s room.”
Bob gazed at the heavy cherry furniture and smiled. “It’s definitely Corrie.”
“And this is for Emmaline.” Bryn opened a door and flipped on the light, then stopped and stared at the empty room.
“Corrie? Where’s all your baby stuff?”
Corrie walked into the room and smiled. “I’m getting new.”
“But you had the whole nursery,” Bryn said. “And you loved it.”
Corrie shook her head. “I got that with Mark, for our baby. I don’t want it anymore.”
Bob took her hand and squeezed it.
“You’re going to be okay,” he said. “So, here’s to new beginnings . . . for all of us.”
Bryn raised her eyebrows and cocked her head. “You all right?”
“Yeah,” he said. “My lawyer called today. The judge signed the papers. I am officially divorced.”
“I’m sorry.” Corrie squeezed his hand now.
“I’m fine, actually.” Bob smiled at her. “I’ve been ready for a while. I’m just glad it’s finally over.”
“And you have full custody?” Bryn asked, watching him carefully.
“Yeah.” Bob ran his hand through his hair. “Wendy’s parents wrote supporting statements for me, and I had the picture of Cody and that asshole blowing pot at him. The judge agreed I’d be the better parent. Wendy gets them every other weekend.”
“Thank God!” Bryn let out a sigh of relief.
“Yeah,” Bob repeated. “I’m really glad it went my way.”
“Do the boys know?” Corrie asked, looking back toward the kitchen where the two little boys still sat making piles.
“I told them this afternoon.”
“Are they okay?”
“Honestly, I think they’re more upset about Bryn moving out than they are about the divorce.”
Bryn stiffened, tears stinging her eyes again.
“Sorry,” Bob said abruptly. “I didn’t mean to guilt you like that.”
“They’ll be fine,” Corrie said. “They have you, and you’re the best dad in the world.”
“Thanks.” Bob smiled at her, then glanced toward Bryn, who was still staring at the floor.
“It’s getting late,” he said, shifting from one foot to the other. “I’d probably better get the boys home and to bed. They have school tomorrow.”
When they finally got to bed after midnight, Bryn lay wide awake in her new yellow room, the pretty quilt drawn up to her chin.
This was the right choice, she told herself. I couldn’t just stay there forever, pretending they were mine. This is a good thing.
She rolled onto her side, willing herself to go to sleep. After a long while, she gave up the pretense and went down to the kitchen for a glass of water.
“Hey.” Corrie stood in front of the refrigerator holding a gallon of milk. “I’m making warm milk. Do you want some?”
Bryn nodded.
They drank their milk in the living room, talking about college and babies and where to put the sideboard. At three, Corrie trudged off to bed. Bryn lay on the couch staring at the ceiling until she finally fell asleep, just before four.
48
On a snowy day in February, Corrie pulled into the driveway of the house she’d shared with Mark. The FOR SALE sign was now topped with a bright red bar, proclaiming, SOLD!
She sat in her car for a few minutes, then got out and pulled her key from her purse. The back door creaked open, the way it always had. The kitchen was clean and bare. The blue and white stripes she loved so much brought tears to her eyes.
“Hey,” Mark called from the front of the house. “Is that you?”
“It’s me.” Corrie set her purse on the breakfast bar and walked slowly into the living room, where Mark leaned against the mantle.
“How are you?” he asked, staring at her slightly rounded belly.
“I’m good.”
They stood awkwardly for a moment, then he said, “There are a few things upstairs I thought you might want.”
She nodded and followed him up the stairs, stopping at the top to stare into the nursery, still decorated in Beatrix Potter. She squeezed her eyes tight, willing herself not to cry.
“Here,” Mark called from the bedroom they’d shared.
She walked into the nearly empty room and concentrated hard on not crying.
“I think this was your dad’s, right?” Mark pointed to a globe on a stand in the corner of the room.
“Yeah,” she said softly. She put her hand on the globe and set it spinning, just the way her father had done when she was small. He would spin the world and let her stop it with her finger, then tell her all about the place her finger had landed.
“And there are a few things in the closet I wasn’t sure about.”
She sorted through clothes, putting some into a bag and piling the rest on the floor.
“Goodwill is coming tomorrow,” Mark said. “You can just leave what you don’t want there.”
In the guest room, she pulled a few books from the pile on the floor and dropped them into the bag, too.
“Are you sure you don’t want anything from the nursery?” Mark stopped in front of the room and looked around. “I know you loved this stuff.”
Corrie walked past him, shaking her head, blinking back tears.
“Okay,” he said, following her down the stairs. “Well, somebody will love it.”
In the kitchen, Corrie added three cookbooks to her bag.
“I guess that’s it,” she said. She pulled the house key from her key chain and set it on the counter.
“I guess so.” Mark stood in the middle of the room, staring at the floor.
“Are you going to look for a house?” Corrie asked, unwilling to leave just yet.
“No, I’m okay in the apartment. I don’t need all this space.”
They stood quietly, then Mark asked, “How do you like your new place?”
“It’s okay.” Corrie shrugged. “We’re having a hard time trying to find space for everything. Are you sure you don’t want the sideboard?”
He smiled and shook his head. “I’ve got nowhere to put it. Maybe you should call Goodwil
l, too.”
“Maybe.”
Corrie looked around the kitchen one more time, then picked up her bag.
“I guess that’s it,” she said again.
She walked to the back door.
“Corrie?” Mark’s voice was soft, hesitant.
She turned to look at him.
“Take care of yourself, okay?” He didn’t meet her eyes.
“I will. You too.”
She carried the bag of clothes and books to the car, then returned for the globe. Mark watched as she closed the trunk and got in the car. He was still watching when she pulled away.
“Was it pretty gruesome?” Bryn took the bag from Corrie in front of their house.
“Yeah, it was.”
“Well, at least it’s over.”
Corrie nodded, pulling the globe from the trunk.
“Where are you going to put that?” Bryn eyed the globe with suspicion. There was not a single square inch of space available in the living room.
“In the baby’s room,” Corrie said, smiling at the globe. “A little bit of her grandpa.”
She carried the globe into the empty nursery, now painted a pale mint green.
“There,” she said, standing the globe in the corner. “Now she has something in her room.”
Bryn put her hand on Corrie’s shoulder and squeezed.
“You know, Bob said I could use his crib. I’m sure he’d let you use it.”
“No,” Corrie said. “I mean, that’s sweet. But I really am going to buy something.”
“Well, you have a while.”
The doorbell jarred them both.
“Who could that be?” Bryn walked into the living room and peeked out the front door.
“Oh hell,” she breathed.
“Who is it?” Corrie walked into the room.
“Paul.” Bryn backed away from the door, shaking her head.
“Do you want me to tell him you’re not here?”
Bryn stood a moment, then sighed again.
“No,” she said. “I guess I’ll talk to him.”
“Well, I’m right here if you need me. I’ll be in the kitchen. Just yell.”
“Thanks.”
Bryn opened the front door and stared at Paul.
The Weight of Small Things Page 26
