by Anna King
‘I know my way from here, Barney. Please stay where you are until I’ve gone. And don’t worry about me telling anyone what happened. I don’t relish the idea of anyone finding out what a stupid idiot I am; I feel ashamed of myself enough as it is.’
Barney moved to let her pass, his guilt mixed with astonishment at the way Jane was handling the situation. He had expected her to cry and try to hold on to him; instead she was acting like a woman beyond her years.
He did as she had asked him.
And he stayed there for a long time after Jane had left the house.
Chapter Nineteen
Josie shut the door behind her, grateful to be home. Kicking her shoes off, she headed straight for the kitchen and put the kettle on to boil. While she waited she removed the takings for the day from her bag and laid the cash box on the table, noticing it was markedly heavier than usual. Being Easter Saturday, the market had been extra busy. It seemed to Josie that the world and his wife had been in the tea shop today.
Emptying the contents of the cash box onto the kitchen table, Josie sorted the coins into different denominations, entering the amounts into a leather-bound ledger. The kettle whistled just as she had finished adding up the rows of figures, and with a sigh of relief she closed the book.
The tea made, Josie curled up in her chair by the empty grate, the mug clasped in her hands, for once thankful of the solitude of the empty house. She’d never thought the day would come when she would be glad she was no longer able to come and go as she pleased from the Flynn household, for that once happy home was now bitterly divided.
Taking comfort from the well-earned tea and rest, Josie mused over the past two months.
Pat had made a full recovery, but the reason behind the unprovoked attack was still unknown. At least by the police. Everyone had been so relieved when Pat had left the hospital, not least Pat himself, who was eager to get back to work, that speculation about his attacker had been pushed to the back of everyone’s mind; including Pat’s. He’d had to rest at home for a further fortnight, advised by the doctor and enforced by Freda and Annie, and during that period everything had been fine. Then Pat had gone back to work, and all hell had broken loose.
He had known that Rory had taken over his job in his absence, and had been immensely grateful that someone he could trust had been put in his place. That was until he’d discovered that Rory had fallen in with Robert Hunter’s demands and was using the substandard materials Pat had fought so hard against. The brothers had nearly come to blows, and they would have if Paddy and Shaun hadn’t stepped in and separated them.
Since then the two of them had barely spoken. Pat had resumed his position as foreman, but by then too much damage had already been done. When challenged, Rory had defended his actions by asking Pat what he would have done in his place; and to this, Pat had had no answer, for it was that same predicament he had been wrestling with when attacked. And that knowledge had caused Pat’s suspicions to resurface. The assault that had left him hospitalised had been very convenient from Robert Hunter’s point of view, but without proof Pat could do nothing.
The building was now near completion, but the Flynns were still a family at war, with Paddy and Annie stuck in the middle.
Josie shivered as the evening began to turn chilly. Rather than go to the trouble of lighting a fire, she ran upstairs to fetch her dressing gown and a blanket from the foot of her bed. As she turned from the bed, she couldn’t help, out of years of habit, glancing out of her window to the house opposite. She paused, her expression turning to one of annoyance, as she saw the shadowy figure of Jane crossing the road towards the house. Josie bit her bottom lip and immediately felt guilty for the way she was feeling, telling herself it wasn’t so long ago that she used to escape to the noisy, happy fold of the Flynn family. Now it was her house that had become a refuge.
Running down the stairs, she opened the door before Jane had time to knock.
‘Oh! You gave me a fright. How did you know I was here?’ Jane entered the house breathlessly. ‘I’m not stopping. Shaun’s going to the chip shop in a minute and Mum asked me to pop over to see if you wanted anything.’
At Jane’s thoughtful words, Josie experienced another wave of shame. You selfish cow, she berated herself silently. Here she was, annoyed that her quiet night in might be invaded, and all Jane wanted was to save her friend from having to cook after a long day.
‘Yeah! That’d be nice, ta. Hang on while I get me purse.’ As she went to fetch her bag, she noticed that Jane hadn’t followed her into the kitchen, which was unusual.
‘Here you are, love. I’ll have cod and chips… No, I’ve changed me mind, I’ll have a bit of skate instead, and whatever everyone else is having. It’s my treat. You deserve it after the day we’ve had. I don’t know about you, but I could go to sleep on me feet right now.’
‘Oh, I don’t know, Josie,’ Jane said awkwardly. ‘You know what Mum’s like about taking favours…’
‘Don’t be daft. It ain’t favours when it’s among friends. Now you go on home, and if your mum kicks up a fuss, you send her over to me.’
Jane smiled, but there was sadness in her eyes, causing Josie to take a better look at her young friend.
‘What’s up, Jane love? You’ve not been your usual self lately. Is it this business between Rory and Pat?’
Jane had visibly jumped; now she relaxed.
‘You’re right, Josie. It is because of Pat and Rory. And it really makes me angry, because for one thing Pat doesn’t live at home any more, so he can come around shouting the odds then go back to his own house. Then when he’s gone, Rory starts trying to put his side of the argument, and me, Shaun, Mum and Dad are caught in the middle. We can’t take sides, can we? But it is causing a lot of bad feeling. Mum won’t hear a word said against Rory, but then he was always her blue-eyed boy. That’s what makes Pat so mad. My dad tries to keep the peace, but it’s not easy. I feel sorry for me dad and Shaun. It’s bad enough at home without having to try and keep Rory and Pat out of each other’s way at work.’
Josie tried hard to look sympathetic but it was difficult. She’d been hearing the same grievances every day at the tea shop from a deeply concerned Annie. But Jane was only sixteen; she shouldn’t have to be involved in the bitter dispute between her brothers. Remembering her earlier uncharitable thoughts, Josie said kindly, ‘Look! How about you come back here after supper? We can have a proper chat; I’ll even light the fire.’
Jane’s pinched face brightened.
‘Thanks, Josie, I’d love to. I know it’s a terrible thing to say, but I’d be glad of the chance to get out of the house for a while.’
‘Well, don’t just stand there, get off ’ome before Shaun goes without waiting for you to get back… Oh! I nearly forgot… Would you take the money with you? I’ve already counted it, but check it for me, will you? I’m bleeding hopeless at arithmetic.’
It was common knowledge that all Josie’s takings from the tea room were kept at the Flynns’ for safekeeping. It had been Annie’s idea to continue this practice, mainly so she wouldn’t have to lie awake each night worrying about Josie having large sums of money in her house.
Later, as they sat by the fire, Josie kept darting worried glances at the young girl as she talked incessantly about mundane matters. She knew Jane well enough to know there was something, other than her family troubles, weighing on her mind.
Her face set, Josie cut into Jane’s ramblings.
‘What’s up, Jane? And don’t try fobbing me off either. Something’s worrying yer, and not only today neither. You’ve been going round like a tit in a trance for the last couple of months. At first I put it down to you worrying about Pat, which was understandable at the time, but not now.’ She stared hard into the young girl’s eyes. ‘Look, I’m worried about yer, love. If there’s something on your mind you can tell me. I promise I won’t tell anyone; not even your mum. Though I can’t think of anything yer could have done that would be b
ad enough to make yer frightened of telling your mum.’
Jane’s head drooped, her fingers plucking nervously at her skirt. Josie, watching her friend struggle with her emotions, kept her counsel. Finally Jane mumbled, ‘Can I ask you something, Josie?’ Relieved that Jane was finally going to tell her what was worrying her, Josie smiled.
‘Course yer can, you daft cow.’
Jane swallowed, took a deep breath and blurted out, ‘Would you have Rory back if he asked you?’
The question was so unexpected it shocked Josie into silence.
‘Oh dear, I’ve upset you, haven’t I? I’m sorry, Josie, I shouldn’t have asked such a personal question.’
Gathering her thoughts together, Josie licked her lips before replying harshly, ‘What on earth made you ask me that?’
Jane hung her head, shaking it from side to side.
‘Look, forget what I said, Josie. Please! Anyway, I’d better be getting home. Hopefully my brothers will have gone out for the evening, and peace will reign once more.’
She made an attempt at a laugh, but couldn’t quite manage it, then went to rise from the armchair, but Josie wasn’t about to let her off the hook so easily.
‘’Ang on a minute, Jane. You must’ve had a reason for asking a question like that. It didn’t just come out of the blue.’ She leaned forward, her expression urgent. ‘Now, tell me what’s going on in that head of yours. And don’t bother trying any lame excuses. I want the truth, ’cos you ain’t leaving here till I get it… Oh! Oh, don’t cry, love,’ Josie said quickly as tears welled up in Jane’s eyes. ‘I didn’t mean to have a go at you, but you must admit, it was a bleeding strange thing to come out with. Look, forget what I just said. You get off home and put your feet up. It’s been a long day and—’
‘No! I don’t… don’t want to go home, Josie, that’s just the point. I… I know that’s an awful thing to say, but I can… can’t help it. Mum and Dad try to keep up a front, but the atmosphere is so awful sometimes.’ Her entire body heaving with sobs, Jane stumbled on. ‘And… and I was just thinking how… how different things would be if you and Rory got ba… back together. Mum’s been sending me out of the room after dinner most nights, but… but I can still hear them arguing from my bedroom.’
Totally lost now, Josie’s forehead furrowed in bewilderment.
‘Just a minute, love. I’m not with you. What on earth has me and Rory got to do with—’
Tears streaming down her cheeks, Jane valiantly strove to compose herself. Drawing in a deep, shuddering breath, she spoke so quietly Josie had to strain to hear her words.
‘Because if you were still going out with Rory, he wouldn’t be so desperate for money to keep that Cathy Meadows happy, and he wouldn’t have gone along with that man’s plans to cut corners on the new building. He keeps saying he hasn’t done anything wrong, but he’s lying, we all know it, and he knows it too. I think he’s more angry with himself than Pat, ’cos Rory’s a good man, you know he is, Josie. It’s that horrible woman’s fault. Whenever she comes back she causes trouble, but I never thought Rory would let himself be bribed on account of her.’ She stopped, her breathing rapid, her face flushed. Then she raised her head and looked Josie straight in the eyes, her own defiant. ‘I hate her, Josie. I really hate her, and that scares me, ’cos I’ve never hated anyone before, and… and it’s not a nice feeling.’
Josie held Jane’s gaze.
‘I know, love, believe me I know. If it makes you feel any better, you’re not alone. I hated her for a long time, but in all fairness, nobody’s forcing Rory to keep on seeing her. He knows what she’s like, and if he’s stupid enough to keep on spending money on her, well, that’s his look-out. He’s a grown man, love, and he makes his own decisions. And he has to take the consequences of his actions; we all do. Anyway, how d’yer know he’s taking bribes? I mean, from what Annie’s told me, Pat would’ve had to do the same, or face the sack. It’s all very well having principles, and I admire people who do, but it’s cold comfort if you’ve a family to support. So don’t be too hard on him. For what it’s worth, I don’t believe Rory would ever take a bribe, ’specially if people’s lives were at stake. Anyway, there’s nothing we can do about it now. Best leave it to the men to sort out among themselves.’
A sudden wave of tiredness swept through her body.
‘Look, love, I hope you don’t think me rude, but I’m whacked. I promised meself an early night with a good book for company, but I think I’ll give the book a miss, ’cos I can hardly keep me eyes open.’
Immediately Jane jumped to her feet, flustered, already regretting her embarrassing outburst. Brushing her tear-stained cheeks with the back of her hand, she mumbled, ‘Sorry, Josie. I didn’t mean to outstay my welcome.’
‘Don’t be silly, you could never do that.’
Josie walked Jane to the door, striving to keep her tone light, for after hearing yet another sordid account of Rory and that slut, she too was hurting inside. Only unlike Jane, she wouldn’t afford herself the luxury of unloading her misery with tears. She’d already shed enough over those two to last a lifetime.
Just as she was about to close the door, Jane stopped and turned as if about to speak.
‘What’s up, love?’ Josie asked, hoping Jane wouldn’t notice the tiredness in her voice.
Jane gave a weak smile.
‘No, it’s nothing. Good night, Josie, thanks for the chat.’
‘Good night, love. See you Monday.’
Wearily Josie closed the door, but not before she’d seen the anxious look that flitted over Jane’s face.
As she prepared for bed, she remembered that look and wondered if there was something Jane was keeping from her, apart from her worry over her favourite brother.
Her face stretched in a wide yawn as she snuggled down under the bed covers. Whatever was worrying Jane could wait until tomorrow.
* * *
Rory sat on the edge of the bed, buttoning up his shirt, wishing he didn’t have to leave the woman he loved. When he was fully dressed he turned and rolled over, leaning on one elbow as he gazed down at Cathy.
‘I’ll have to go, darling, it’s late.’ He stroked her smooth skin with the back of his hand.
Cathy rolled over and smiled lazily. Catching hold of his hand, she laid it against her cheek.
‘I had a wonderful time tonight, Rory. I’ll be here for another few days, so when will I see you again?’ she murmured seductively.
The corners of Rory’s mouth lifted in the crooked smile she loved so much. Yet even loving him as she did, it wasn’t enough. Pulling herself upright, she laid her head against the feather pillows, knowing how beautiful she looked with her mass of golden curls tumbling over her shoulders and naked breasts.
Rory bent down to kiss the full lips.
‘Every night of me life if I could, sweetheart. And we could if you’d leave that Jonathan bloke. I—’
Cathy pulled away from him, her expression changing swiftly to one of irritation; the loving intimacy they had shared only a few moments earlier vanishing like a puff of smoke. Her voice cool, she said, ‘For heaven’s sake don’t start that again, Rory, it’s getting to be boring. Now you listen to me, and listen good, ’cos I’m only gonna tell you once more. I ain…’ She paused, then, in the affected voice she always adopted when wanting to put Rory in his place, continued, ‘I mean, I’m not going to leave Jonathan. I’m too used to the good life to throw it all away to live in some dreary hovel, like the ones you’re building. I know what it’s like to live from hand to mouth, and I’m not going back to that way of life. And I’m sick of having to repeat it over and over again. What will it take for you to accept the fact that I’m perfectly happy as I am? Do you want it carved in stone? Oh! Damn you, Rory. Why can’t you be satisfied with the way things are? Go on, go home to your bloody family. I’m sure your mum will be waiting up for you.’ Her upper lip curled back over white teeth. ‘All you ever talk about is your precious family… and
good old Josie of course.’
Rory turned away from her, his fists clenched tight, wondering how it was possible to love a person and hate them at the same time. Between clenched teeth he growled, ‘Don’t push me too far, Cathy.’
‘Don’t push me too far, Cathy,’ she mimicked sneeringly. ‘Or what?’
There was no mistaking the challenge in her voice. She had thrown down the gauntlet; now it was up to Rory to either pick it up or let it lie.
The bedsprings squeaked as Rory removed his weight.
‘I’m going. There’s no point talking to yer when you’re in this sort of mood. But I’ll tell yer this much. I’d move outta ’ome and get a place of me own if I thought it’d make things easier for us, instead of ’aving to sneak a couple of hours in some poxy hotel. But then I wouldn’t ‘ave as much money to spend on yer if I got me own place, and you wouldn’t like that, would yer?’
Cathy’s face remained mulish.
‘If you really loved me, you’d find a job that paid better. Or better still, take that job Robert Hunter offered you. Just because your brother’s taking the moral high ground, it doesn’t mean you have to. I mean, what does it matter if you’ve cut a few corners here and there? Lots of builders do it all the time; what makes you so special? Besides, it’s not as if those flats are being built for people that matter. In fact the sort of tenants your buildings attract are probably from the slums. They’ll think they’re in the lap of luxury after the hovels they’ve been living in.’
Rory slowly turned to face her, his emotions in turmoil. A combination of anger, fear and pain filled his eyes with mist and blotted her from his sight, and he pulled at his collar to ease the choking feeling in his throat. Then the mist cleared and he saw her as others did, the side of her that his love had blinded him to for so long.
Still he had to give her the chance to redeem herself in his eyes, for surely she couldn’t hold human life so cheaply!
