by Anna King
‘Could I see him, please?’ she pleaded.
The orderlies stopped and waited as Josie pulled back the blanket from Shaun’s face. He looked so peaceful, and she was glad of that, for it meant he hadn’t suffered. Her vision blurred, she bent down and for the last time kissed the kind, gentle man who she knew had loved her. Tears rained down on the still face as Josie laid her cheek next to Shaun’s.
‘Goodbye, Shaun. Oh, Shaun… Shaun. It’s not fair, it’s not fair…’
Barney felt his own eyes prickle, and quickly controlled his emotions. Pulling Josie away, he jerked his head at the two orderlies, and they hastened their steps, eager now to get the hospital, where they would be relieved of their duties.
Behind them they left a distraught Josie being comforted by the man who had, indirectly, been a party to the catastrophe that surrounded them.
Chapter Twenty-Two
‘Morning, Josie. ’Eard anything from Annie yet? Your place ain’t the same without ’er ’aving a go at us and making us laugh. Not that we don’t enjoy your company, Josie,’ the market trader added hastily, his face split into a wide grin.
Josie smiled back, though it was becoming an effort. She had been hearing the same question for months now, and her answer was always the same.
‘Nothing yet, Charlie. But I’ll let yer know as soon as I ’ear anything.’
‘Cheers, Josie. D’yer know, it’s ’ard to believe it’s nearly a year since the accident. Seems like only a couple of weeks ago, don’t it?’
Josie just nodded, and the man took the hint.
‘Righto, darling. See yer later.’
‘Yeah, see yer later, Charlie.’ Josie waved and walked on quickly, keeping her eyes firmly on the ground so as to field off any further questions regarding the Flynns.
Opening the café, she busied herself getting it ready for the breakfast rush. Once everything was in place, she sat down with a mug of tea, enjoying the fifteen minutes she set aside for herself each morning before the traders started arriving. Blowing on the hot tea, she reflected on what Charlie had said. He was right: it didn’t seem like a year ago since their world had been turned upside down. Sometimes it seemed much longer, in another time – and sometimes it seemed like only yesterday. To all intents and purposes it might well have been. The anguish she’d experienced on that and the following days was still fresh in her mind. If she were to close her eyes she could still see the coffin bearing Shaun’s body being lowered into the open grave, still hear the cries of Annie as she buried her youngest son, the pitiful sound almost drowned amongst the sobs of everyone present.
But that hadn’t been the end of Annie’s grief. For the shock of losing his son had resulted in Paddy being rushed to hospital, his heart giving out through the trauma it had sustained. Jane too had collapsed, and had been taken with her father in the same ambulance. To the mourners attending the funeral it had presented all the makings of a theatrical play; but to Josie and the remainder of the family it had only served to heighten the nightmare of the past week – and there was a further shock still to come.
While Annie, Pat and Rory had waited to hear news of Paddy, Josie had volunteered to sit with Jane. During that time she had subconsciously prayed that the shock would bring on a miscarriage, thus saving Jane and the rest of the family from any further worry. But her prayers had gone unanswered. Looking back to that dreadful time, she felt a rush of guilt for even having thought of such a thing. Yet she had truly had everyone’s best interests at heart.
She had been the one to impart the news of Jane’s pregnancy to a bewildered Annie – a woman who had just buried a son and was now facing losing her husband as well. Knowing Annie as she did, Josie imagined that the devout Catholic must have wondered what terrible thing she had done to cause her God to desert her. Yet even in that, her darkest hour, Annie still clung to her faith, sitting beside her husband and her daughter in turn, her rosary beads running through her fingers as she kept up a constant vigil of prayer.
Josie didn’t know what might have happened to the family if Matthew Hunter hadn’t stepped in and taken control of the fraught situation. He had arrived at the hospital and immediately insisted both Paddy and Jane be removed to private rooms. He had also made certain they both had the best specialist and nursing care available.
Paddy’s recovery was slow, and the family were warned not to say or do anything that might put it in jeopardy.
Jane had visited her father every day, until her condition had begun to show. Even though the doctors had given Paddy the all-clear, she had been terrified her dad would have a relapse once he knew his only daughter had been made pregnant by a man she wouldn’t name. But there she had been proved wrong.
Once back home, Paddy had been told the truth, but instead of having a relapse, he had drawn on his inner strength to help and care for his beloved daughter. That had left only the small matter of taking care of the gossips. For a woman of any age to have a child out of wedlock was considered a scandal, and the woman in question little more than a whore. In normal circumstances, Annie, once over the shock, would have stood by her daughter, defying anyone to defile Jane’s name and character. But those hadn’t been normal circumstances, and the usually stalwart woman had been in a very vulnerable state.
It was at that point that Matthew Hunter had again stepped in to help. He had kept in constant touch with the family during their harrowing ordeal, and such was the gratitude felt by the Flynns for his kindness and help, they had kept no secrets from him. It was his idea to send Jane and her parents to Ireland until the baby was born. This kind offer had come as a godsend to Annie, for not only would Jane be spared the looks and sly whispers, but Annie would at last see her brother Declan again.
The sound of the bell tinkling over the door brought Josie out of her reverie. She glanced at the wall clock and was shocked to find she’d been sitting daydreaming for nearly half an hour. In a panic now, she had the frying pan loaded with bacon and sausages in minutes. Pouring a mug of tea from the giant urn, she took it into the tea room.
‘Sorry, Charlie, it ain’t quite ready yet. My fault, I was too busy daydreaming. Look, it won’t be long, and seeing as you’ve gotta wait, yer can ’ave this one on the ’ouse, and a mug of tea to be getting on with.’
Charlie gazed at Josie fondly. She was a lovely girl in more ways than one. There was hardly a man in the market who hadn’t tried his luck, but Josie wasn’t having any of it. Even if he wasn’t happily married, and a good twenty years younger, Charlie knew that a girl like Josie was well out of his league. Rumour had it she was still carrying a torch for Rory Flynn. Whatever the reason, she continued to steadfastly refuse any offers from the many men who frequented the café. Yet she did it in such a way that the men still left feeling good about themselves. Now Charlie looked upon himself as a father figure and was fiercely protective of Josie. And during Paddy’s absence, that protection now included Jane as well.
Opening his morning paper, Charlie smiled good- naturedly. ‘Don’t be daft, love. You’ve got a living to earn, just like the rest of us. I don’t mind waiting a few minutes; besides, Jane’ll be in soon, won’t she?’
‘Yeah, thank goodness. She had a bit of a rough night with Shaun. The poor little devil’s teething.’
Charlie gave a sympathetic smile.
‘Still living with yer, are they?’ Then he laughed. ‘That was a bloody silly question, wasn’t it? Still, it must be ’ard on yer, love. I remember when my lot was that age. Didn’t get a decent night’s kip for years. Still, they’re better off with you till Annie and Paddy get back.’ His face became solemn, and he seemed to wait a bit before asking awkwardly, ‘Rory still no better then?’ He saw Josie flinch and took her hand. ‘Sorry, love. Me an’ my big mouth, always putting me foot in it. It just seems a shame he’s missing out on ’aving his sister and nephew at ’ome with ’im. I’d’ve thought it’d do ’im the world of good ’aving Jane an’ the little ’un around the place.’ He abs
ently scratched behind his ear, embarrassed now. ‘Still, what do I know, eh, love?’
‘It’s all right, Charlie, I know yer mean well; I’ll get your breakfast.’
Charlie’s words had evoked images she had constantly tried to suppress since the accident. Alone in the large kitchen, she raced around in a whirl, trying to catch up on lost time, thinking that if she kept busy it wouldn’t give her time to dwell on the past; but it was no good. She couldn’t get thoughts of Rory out of her mind. Out of all the family, he was the one who had suffered the most. For not only had his younger brother died saving him, he still blamed himself for letting the accident happen, and the guilt had lain heavy on his mind, turning him from an easy-going, happy and confident man to one broken up inside.
Pat had tried to ease Rory’s mind by pointing out that it could just as easily have been him who had overseen the building of that block of flats, for he had let the building go ahead when he’d returned to work. But no amount of words could convince Rory he wasn’t to blame for Shaun’s death.
He and Pat were currently working on another site for Matthew Hunter, but that was all Rory did. He went to work, came home, slept a few hours, then went back to work the following morning. On Sundays he didn’t even bother to get out of bed. Josie had tried to help when Annie and Paddy set off for Ireland, but Rory had told her in no uncertain terms that he didn’t need anyone’s help. Then he had shut the door in her face.
She hadn’t seen him again until a few days ago, when Jane and little Shaun had turned up on her doorstep. Rory had first come over to speak to her on his own. He had been unshaven and scruffy, his clothes hanging loose on the once muscular frame, and Josie had been deeply shocked at the sight of him, for Rory had always been so particular about his personal appearance. He had gruffly asked if she would take Jane and the baby in until Annie and Paddy came back, and Josie, desperately lonely without her friends, had readily agreed.
Now, even having not enjoyed a full night’s sleep for the past four nights, she didn’t regret her decision one iota. In fact she treasured this time with Jane and the baby, for she knew it would be short-lived. It had come as a tremendous shock to Josie to realise that Annie had let Jane and baby Shaun return to England on their own, fuelling her fear that Annie’s state of mind was still frail, but Jane had soon reassured her, explaining that they had been preparing to leave Ireland when her uncle had been taken ill. Although not serious, Annie had used her brother’s ill health as an excuse to stay with him a little longer, for, as she had tearfully explained to her husband and daughter, once she returned to England, it was doubtful she would ever see him again. Even so, she had balked at the idea of her precious daughter and grandson making the journey back alone.
But it was the change in Jane’s character that had caused the most surprise to Josie. For the once timid girl had changed remarkably. When Josie had taken her in she had expected Jane to stay in the house behind closed curtains, but Jane would have none of it. Instead, she had wheeled her son down the street and around the market, her head held high as she pushed the pram past stunned faces, her eyes silently challenging anyone to make a scurrilous comment. Josie smiled to herself. She should have realised the depth of Jane’s character by her steadfast refusal to name the father of her illegitimate son; she was indeed her mother’s daughter! The support of the market traders had done much to strengthen Jane’s resolve not to hide away. Like a family, they had closed ranks around the young girl, their protectiveness soon made apparent to the curious shoppers hoping for a juicy bit of gossip. One and all had been sent on their way with a curt word; some more colourful than others.
As if she had conjured them up out of thin air, Jane came in by the back door, pulling the cumbersome pram with her.
‘Sorry, Josie, I’ve only just got him settled.’ She left the pram in the doorway while she took her coat off and donned her apron. ‘You can’t have had much sleep either, with him crying most of the night.’
Josie gave a wry smile.
‘Don’t worry, I’ll survive. Though if those blasted teeth of his don’t come through soon, I’ll buy him a set of false ones.’
Jane ignored this remark, saying, ‘Anyone in yet?’
‘Yeah, Charlie. I’m running a bit late today. Do the eggs for me, will yer, love, then take it through. The poor sod must be starving. I’m glad I don’t have to open at the crack of dawn, not that I haven’t been asked plenty of times. But as much as I’m fond of all of them, I ain’t getting outta my bed at five in the morning for anyone…’ She paused, looking towards the pram. ‘Well, almost anyone.’ She smiled lovingly.
Jane checked the frying pan’s contents, took out three sausages and two rashers of bacon, which she put on a warm plate from the oven, dropped two slices of bread into the sizzling fat, waited a few seconds, turned them over, then added them to the plate along with two fried eggs.
‘The pan needs filling, Josie. When you’ve finished staring at Shaun, of course. Though if you wake him up, you can get him back down again, all right?’
Josie made a face at Jane, then turned back to the pram for another few precious seconds before returning to work. From the other room she heard the bell ring twice in succession, and Jane’s laugh as she talked to the customers. And that sound was music to Josie’s ears. There had been a time when Josie had thought never to hear it again. When Jane’s pregnancy had first become known, Annie, in desperation, had asked Pat if he and Freda would consider adopting the baby. Pat would have agreed like a shot, but Freda had refused point blank. Her reason to Annie was that she wanted a family of her own, but in private she had told Pat she wasn’t taking in any bastard, especially when the father could be anyone. And that fact remained a mystery, for Jane, who had always been so biddable, had refused to reveal the identity of the father.
In normal circumstances, Annie wouldn’t have rested until she’d elicited the truth from her daughter, who she still considered a child herself.
But those hadn’t been normal circumstances, and Annie, tired and grief-stricken as she had been, had been unable to cope with any more traumas. She had always been a strong woman, able to tackle any problem that arose in the family, but even the strong had their breaking point; and Annie had had her fair share. There had been a time during that dreadful period when Josie had feared for Annie’s state of mind; not to mention her children, who had expected her to ease their pain and pull the family together again.
Then Mister Hunter had stepped in!
Remembering the kindness of the man caused Josie to pause in her cooking. That poor man. Everyone’s sympathies had lain with the Flynns, yet Matthew Hunter had suffered; in a different way, but none the less painful for that. He had turned his son over to the police, an action that had nearly caused the break-up of his marriage, for his wife had wanted to give her only son the benefit of the doubt. Agreeing to meet his wife halfway, Matthew had reluctantly put up the bail money to get his son out of prison until the trial date. And how had that smarmy bastard repaid him? Only done a bunk, leaving his father with a thousand pounds’ debt. Not content with that, he had also taken all his mother’s jewellery, and the small amount of money Matthew had had in his safe. No one knew where he was now, but the general consensus was that he would soon be forced to return home, because he could never make it on his own wits.
‘Two more breakfasts, Josie. Honest, I don’t know where they put it, especially when they come back again for dinner, and puddings, though the puddings aren’t as good as Mum makes; as is constantly commented on. Oh, Josie, I wish me mum and dad were back. I don’t half miss them.’
Josie looked at the sad face, knowing exactly how Jane felt, for she too missed them, especially Annie; dear, larger-than-life Annie. Without her presence there was a void that could never be filled until her return. Though that in turn would create another void in Josie’s life, because as soon as Paddy and Annie came back from Ireland, Jane and young Shaun would move back home; and Josie would miss t
hem terribly.
‘You daydreaming again, Josie? The place is filling up.’
Startled, Josie set to work, cooking and talking as she went.
‘Sorry, Jane. I was just thinking about your mum and dad. If one more person asks me when they’re coming back I’ll scream.’
‘I know, Josie. Some days I wish I hadn’t come back early. But Mum never gave me a minute alone with Shaun. I know she meant well, and I couldn’t have got through it all without her, but I had to get away. She was smothering me, Josie. To Mum I’m still her little girl, and I needed the chance to stand on me own two feet. So when Uncle Declan caught influenza, I took the chance to come back on my own. Mum nearly had a fit, but I’d made up my mind. Mind you, I wasn’t quite fair. I mean, I knew how much Mum hated the thought of leaving Uncle Declan and I took advantage of the situation. I know I’ve only been back four days, and I know things would be a lot different if you hadn’t taken me and Shaun in, but I’m learning to cope. It isn’t easy, especially when I’ve always had everything done for me.’ Holding a tray with three laden plates, Jane smiled wryly. ‘Mind you, I wouldn’t say no to a lie-in tomorrow if you’re offering.’
‘What was that yer was just saying about standing on your own two feet?’
Jane shrugged.
‘Well, it was worth a try… By the way, those sausages are burning.’
Josie whirled round, then relaxed when she realised Jane had been teasing her. A soft gurgle attracted her attention and she looked in the pram. Two large blue eyes were staring back at her, the small mouth uttering a squeal of delight at the familiar face peering down at him, and Josie’s heart melted.
‘Oh, you’re awake, are yer? Well I ain’t picking you up, so there’s no use yer looking at me like that.’ As she moved away, a cry of disappointment came from the pram and she cursed herself for letting the baby see her. Pulling the pram into the kitchen, she propped the four-month-old baby up against his pillows and laid his rattle and toys in his lap.
