He leaned away from her, the smile gone and a tender light radiating out from beneath his brows. “Are you sure you want me doing this? You found the wire all by yourself.”
“No, I mean yes,” she relented, “I mean, I’m sorry I snapped. I guess I’m tired.”
“You’re way past tired, Eden. You’re exhausted, and you’ve just survived a couple serious attacks on your life.” He settled to his butt, his elbows on his knees. “This can wait.”
“But it can’t, can it?” She refused to cry in front of him. “I don’t want to be under Zaroyin’s control, and I can’t reach some places. I don’t trust myself even if I could. Just do it. Give me a thorough once over. Make it quick.”
He hesitated. “I don’t know. I might have to get personal.”
“Like you already haven’t? Who else should I ask then? I can’t and I won’t let Sam or Tucker do this. Tate couldn’t care less. I guess that leaves you.” Her snarkiest tone knifed out at poor Ky. He might not have deserved it, but it served her purpose. He’d keep his touch clinical and quick. “Besides, I don’t need Sam and Tucker knowing what Zaroyin or Levine might’ve done or... never mind. Just get it over with.”
“Okay,” he said softly. “Then let’s get this over with.”
Ky dropped the smile and kept going, his callused hands sliding up inside her jackets and beneath her layered shirts, feeling over her shoulder, sliding over more and more bare skin. Her stomach. Her rib cage. Like it or not, energy sizzled between them, jumping like little flames from his big, manly hands to her, lapping up her spine, peaking her nipples. Darned if the tent didn’t turn into a steamy sauna. He hovered low and close on his knees, breathing hard, his palms so darned warm and—
Ky slipped one inside the right cup of her bra. Then the left. Quickly. Clinically. It didn’t matter. He was still touching her, and her heart reacted along with her body. Thrumming and throbbing for more. Eden closed her eyes, no longer able to breathe. Everything he did, he did gently—almost reverently. The rough pad of his thumb brushed over her nipple, and snap. Her libido sprang to life. She arched into his hand, a total involuntary reaction.
Stop it, she commanded her traitorous body. Settle down. Relax. He’s just a guy. This is just what has to be done. It means nothing. Pretend he’s a doctor. Or a plumber.
“No implants here,” he murmured, more bass to his soft voice, more heat to his palms.
A surge of heat rushed her, shoving her common sense out the door with Tucker and Sam. Flustered under its wake, Eden sat up straighter and leaned into Ky to keep her balance, her cheek against the chest pocket of his jacket. She let him smooth those big, wide, warm palms of his over her bare back and shoulder blades because... It means nothing. It just has to be done.
Ky pulled her close, bunching her layers of shirts out of his way and smoothing his fingers up her spinal column, one vertebra at a time. Slowly. Methodically. He breathed hard. She breathed hard. Any other time, this would’ve been quite the prelude to one heck of a romantic evening, but not in a tent in the middle of Canada with two father bears lurking outside and no doubt growling up a storm.
Her poor head pounded along with her heart. The migraine was back, and her control was slipping. She clung to Ky’s massive biceps while his hands eased her clothing out of his way, still keeping her mostly covered while they slid lower to her waist. Then her hips. Lower.
Modesty was no longer a viable option. She needed any remaining implants found and destroyed, but snap. This was the most erotic examination she’d ever—ever—had. A blazing inferno sprang to life when he slid his hands into her pants and carefully cupped the cheeks of her ass. A low rumble lifted up from deep inside his throat. “I’m only doing this because I need to be thorough, so these dizzy spells stop once and for all. Honest. I’m not trying to molest you.”
“I know,” she said hoarsely. If he was really thorough, his fingers would soon slide closer to the place where no man had been before. He couldn’t afford to not search—there. She swallowed hard. Wouldn’t that be the perfect hiding place? Darn you, Zaroyin.
Ky already knew she was no real FBI agent, but she dared herself to suck it up and be brave like one. “Go ahead,” she whispered breathlessly. “I’m a consenting adult. I agreed to this examination, and I know what you have to do next. Do it already. I can take it.” I think.
He bumped her head with his chin, forcing her eyes up. “I’m not sure that’s a good idea, Eden. I know you want to be out from under Zaroyin’s control, but you’re trembling. I don’t want to hurt you, not after what Levine might have done. This examination can wait until we get out of here. You need a real doctor in a clean, private setting, not some guy you’re stuck with in the wilds of Canada. Certainly not with me.”
Her heart stalled at the genuine tenderness glowing deep in those pools of melted amber. Smoldering heat spilled into her like warm molasses, filling the holes in her soul left by her father and Stan, softening the blows dealt to her by life. By all the deaths around her. By the evil perpetrated against her.
A different facet to this diamond-in-the-rough named Ky, this warrior who was more scarred and more damaged than she was, emerged. He was larger than life. A gentle hero who’d been through the depravities of hell, yet retained the finer sensibilities of a good and decent man.
Despite her consent, he was giving her the choice and control over her body. He was offering her a reasonable alternative in the middle of the chaos her life had turned into instead of taking advantage of her. He was protecting her virtue. Respecting her. Restoring her confidence in herself. And in his quiet, resolute way, he was giving her what he needed. He was giving her—himself. She didn’t feel quite so alone any more.
The truth came softly, spilling out before she allowed any thoughts of repercussions or second guesses. “You’re not just some guy. You’re Ky Winchester, my long lost friend.” Eden swallowed hard, needing him to believe her. “I stood by you then, and I want you to do this now. I need to be free from Zaroyin. You’re the only one who can do that for me.”
The real question lay before them now. Was he willing to take that final step, to close the chasm between them? To take down the walls he’d erected to protect himself? Was he willing to trust the man he was? The tender hero he’d always been?
Ky blinked, his forehead crinkled, and his brows slanted sharply together as if he was no longer certain what they were talking about. “Are you absolutely sure?”
Eden nodded quickly. She’d never been more positive. “I trust you, Ky. Only you. I think somehow, you trust me, too. You have for years.” She shackled the jacket sleeve at his wrist, needing the connection in case he panicked. “It’s like we’ve always known each other. As if every single thing that’s happened to both of us until now has put us here, at this exact point in time.”
He nodded as if he understood, but she knew she’d made him nervous. She’d put him on the spot simply because he believed himself less of a man. An undesirable because of what others had done to him. Oh, please. If he was any more desirable, she’d melt in his hands. She’d never wanted a man more than this one.
“I’ll be quick and careful, Eden. I won’t hurt you. I promise,” he said, his voice husky.
“I know,” She was going for resolute, but her voice came out small and scared. Breathy.
With a curt nod, Ky circled her inside one muscular arm, pressing her cheek against his chest as he eased her pants down and very slowly slid one hand between her legs. She widened her knees without trembling. He smoothed his palms inside her thighs, but when the ex-Marine’s breath caught at the first contact of his fingertips with her most erogenous zone, her heart stopped.
Eden buried her face in his jacket and circled one arm around his waist to keep from shivering. She’d never been this far before. Tongues of liquid fire poured out of her. The scent of her sex filled the space around them. Ky had to have noticed that her body transformed into a clenching, wiggling mass of overheated mus
cles she couldn’t begin to control, but had to. Somehow. She squeezed her eyes shut at the physical response he incited in her. Her heart back-flipped while her belly ached with need.
“You are so taking me out to dinner after this mission’s over,” she mumbled, going for casual when this encounter was anything but.
The man didn’t flinch or pull back as she’d expected. “I’m thinking more than just dinner.”
She squeezed her eyes tight even though her heart leapt up at that word. That tempting more, but how the heck could there be more with a man she couldn’t touch?
“Hold on to me, Eden,” he murmured hoarsely. “This next part might hurt a little if Levine did what we’re afraid he did.”
She buried her nose in his jacket, pulling every stray male pheromone of Ky into her soul. Every last scent. The exercise only heightened her already strung-tight nerves. Want to or not, her most intimate feminine muscles clenched around his fingers. He definitely noticed. His breath hitched. “Levine might not have taken advantage of you, honey. There’s nothing here.”
Bet me there’s nothing there. Then why is your heart jackhammering like mine? Why are you holding onto me so tight?
“Don’t stop,” she murmured to his chest, knowing full well that Ky had found something he needed inside of her female body. Something he desperately needed to release the inhibited male he’d transformed himself into in an attempt to protect his heart. Please, Ky. Do it. Go all the way. Take me in your arms. Lay me down and make love to me.
But she knew better. He wouldn’t because he couldn’t, and she, FBI Agent Eden Stark, was an idiot to think otherwise. This was nothing but an impersonal examination that she couldn’t trust herself to accomplish, not after the way she’d been mind-controlled.
No sooner had she settled for rejection when he dipped her backward in his arm, his lips frantic on her mouth, and his fingers right where she wanted them to stay. Inside her. Eden clamped a hand to the covered muscles of his shoulder, wanting that elusive more. Right. Darned. Now.
The passion of his kiss took on a life of its own. His tongue slid over the seam of her lips, asking permission even as his fingers teased her senseless.
Eden gave in, combusting in the frozen woods of Canada with the man of her dreams pouring the most delightful accelerant all over her body. She stroked the tip of his tongue with hers, melting into this gentle warrior who needed her as much as she needed him. Did he know that yet? How could he not?
His fingers stayed where they were, tempting her body and soul with this heady new experience. Urging her to let go and fall over the edge of passion. To fly. Could a person go insane with passion? Could they toss all caution to the wind and hope their reckless run off a cliff proved the best decision in the end? Would Ky truly catch her like she knew she would most assuredly catch him?
Her stomach clenched. She breathed hard into his neck and threw the last of her restraint away. Prepared to fly. Prepared to trust this one man with all her heart, to finally let go.
“Give it up to me, Eden,” he growled softly, his fingers gentle and warm.
Oh, I wish!
She writhed in his arms, dying and daring. So close to the edge.
“Come for me, Eden. Give it all to me.” He plunged deeper, and yes—yes—oh, my God, yes! She felt the blood rushing through his veins, through her heart. She let herself soar. She flew. Make that she fell. Into Ky. Into the safety of his strong arms. Into the depths of his heart and the sanctuary of his soul.
His mouth covered hers, devouring her lips and tongue and chin. Greedily tasting. Sucking and nipping as if he hadn’t eaten in years. Waves of blistering heat radiated off of him, blanketing her with intense feelings she’d not known before. So this is what I’ve been missing. This endless oneness. This feeling of being found and eaten alive. Savored. Treasured.
Shuddering under the sensational and very sensual onslaught of her first orgasm, her heart morphed into a throbbing beast in her chest. Tilting her head back, she gave him access to her neck. What have I done? Eden thought, but her mouth said, “Do that again, Ky.”
He had the good grace to smile against her throat. She felt his lips crinkle. She heard his sigh. At last, he eased his fingers out of her and bowed his face into her neck, sweating and panting. “You’re too much.”
“Is that a good thing?”
A sexy rumble escaped his throat. “Oh, yes-s-s.”
Eden couldn’t hold back the smile. This was what had been missing in her life. This was the who. The one. This glorious alpha male who struggled with his own ungodly demon—himself. They were an odd pairing: a psychic very much alone in the world and a wounded warrior who’d done his best to save the world.
The air in that cramped little tent filled with the sultry fragrance of her sex and the sense of having committed a wonderfully foolish indiscretion. She held him close, her eyes filled with tears at the amazing gift he’d just given her. She would never forget this moment.
Until then, life had been a cloistered role she’d played for everyone else. She’d been a good girl, obeyed her mother when she was still alive. Eden had simply loved Casey, and poor Casey’d had her hands full being a single mom. She hadn’t needed a selfish, willful daughter on top of everything else, so Eden had always strived to be that one, bright spot in her mother’s fourteen-hour day.
Eden served her country. She’d worked her duty hours and every mission required. But there she was in the middle of winter, half-naked and so in love she would’ve gladly given Ky access to the rest of her body. A painfully intense surge of emotions lifted up from her heart, flooding her until it hurt.
Ky tugged her panties back into place. Then her jeans. “I think I owe you more than just dinner and a dance after this.”
Her poor heart stalled. What a stupid thing to say. Would he now desert her like every other male in her life had? Would he shove her away like yesterday’s trash? Like he did before? Here it comes again. Another brush-off. Another ending.
She pushed his hand away, her eyes already filled with tears he’d never see fall, darn him. He needed to run away and join Tucker and Sam, the sooner the better. “No. I’m fine. Just leave.”
“Hey,” he whispered, his palm cupping her cheek, lifting her chin and making her meet his eyes. “Did I hurt you?”
“I said I’m fine,” she lied, giving him no more than a fleeting glance. “Now go. Leave me alone.” I don’t need you, either!
“Eden. Look at me.”
Why should I?
“Eden.”
She gulped and met his tender gaze. “Wh-what?” she asked in her most defiant tone, blinking fast and furious through her emotional meltdown. It had come out of nowhere, but men were men, darn it. They were all the same. They always let her down. What was I thinking?
Without a word, Ky encapsulated her inside of his muscular arms, under his chin and against his still pounding heart. “I’m afraid that I—”
“Stop, Ky. It’s over. It meant nothing. Really. You didn’t find anything and... and... just go.” She twisted away, fighting his embrace.
He held her until she stilled, until she stopped running away from him. With a feathery soft kiss to her forehead, he whispered, “It meant something to me.”
Eden stopped trying to be resilient and unbreakable and all those other stupid FBI traits, and she just listened. She stopped feeling sorry for herself, and throwing up her brand of barriers at Ky. She let him into her heart the way she wanted to be inside of his.
“I’m sorry about before, Eden, honest I am,” he said to the top of her head. “I’ve been a jerk. You deserve so much better than me, but if you’re willing, I’d like a do-over.”
“A w-what-over?”
Chapter Fifteen
“A do-over, Eden. A second chance. Another this...” He nudged her forehead with his nose, and she took the hint, lifting her chin to stare him down, but he had his eyes closed and his lips pursed. He meant to kiss her again, and God, she
should’ve had the good sense to reject him first, but she couldn’t. Didn’t even try.
Eden succumbed once again to this gentle, damaged man. Instead of smoothing her fingers into his scalp, instead of nibbling a trail of temptation to the hollow of his neck, she thrust her TEAMwear-covered body against his.
Intoxicated and probably out of her ever-loving mind, she let her trembling fingers dance over his broad shoulders. Now was not the time to push for more, but push she did, and as much as she dared. Her body slipped into a purely instinctual response, bucking against his solid frame as her insatiable hunger clutched at this second chance.
Groaning into her mouth, he obeyed her implied command, his hands suddenly under her sweater, shoving her bra up and out of his way. Palming her breast, the pad of his thumb scraped over a tightly knotted peak, and Eden nearly was very close to losing her slim hold on Ky’s number one and very stupid rule. Don’t touch.
Her fingers twitched to tunnel through his hair, to rub through the scruff on his chin, to trace the fine lines of his cheekbones and his brows. To ease the care from the edges of his eyes.
The feel of his callused hands skimming over her tender breasts, hot and heavy with a hunger for his mouth, lulled her with a delicious addiction she had no resistance to. She couldn’t get enough of this man. This now. She didn’t want to stop. Couldn’t begin to slow this freight train of desire down.
Her breasts ached for more pressure. More squeezing. He tugged and pinched one nipple, and she wanted his head under her shirt and his mouth sucking that tender nipple until he consumed it. She knew biology, but this was so much more intense. A fierce need drove her off the ground and against him.
His fingers lit a path straight to her core. A fire had begun that she couldn’t put out. She wanted it to run its course, to burn the loneliness out of her until only his smoldering touch remained, until he’d branded every last inch of her. Maybe by then, it would scorch the bad memories out of him, too. Maybe he’d finally relish her touch as much as she craved his.
Ky (In the Company of Snipers Book 13) Page 15
