by Hannah Gray
I shouldn’t even be thinking about sex with Anna. For Christ’s sake, she’s eight months pregnant. But fuck if I am anyway. She’s so sexy that I can’t help myself. She just does things to me. She always has.
Pulling my truck in front of my house, I make my way inside. Eager to see what the interior decorator did today. I go to the room across from mine and flick the light on. A huge-ass smile spreads over my entire face so wide that my cheeks hurt.
It looks similar to the nursery at Anna’s house. I sent my interior designer pictures and told her to see what she could do. I didn’t want it identical. I thought that might weird her out too much. But I wanted it similar. I saw she was going for the light-purple and white flowery look. So, that’s what this looks like. I had a glider chair brought in along with a futon in the corner for sleepless nights. Her crib and all of the furniture are the same color as they are at Anna’s—a rustic white. My designer knows her shit. She hit it out of the park; it looks awesome. Now, let’s hope Anna doesn’t freak out when she sees it.
I haven’t asked Anna if she has any names. I figure she’ll tell me when she is ready.
I know one thing: I want this baby, her mom, and the whole family. Not just because she’s pregnant, but also because I’ve wanted her for a long time. And this baby, she makes us a family. Anna is meant to be mine, and she will be before long.
I hear my phone ring and see my mom’s name flashing across the screen. Fuck, how could I forget that she’s coming tomorrow to stay for a week? That means she and my dad will both be at my game. Awesome.
I slide my thumb across the screen. “Hey, Mom.”
“Well, hello, my superstar, famous son. You get harder to get ahold of every day.” She tries to play it off as a joke, but I can tell she’s a little sad about it.
I grimace. “I know. Sorry, Mom. How’s it going? You still coming down tomorrow?”
I have ignored her calls a lot lately. Not purposely. I’ve just been so damn busy, trying to be an NFL athlete and win Anna’s trust back. Shit’s keeping me occupied.
“Sure am. Are you going to make time to hang with your mama? I was thinking we could go into the city. If you have time, that is?”
I think of how much attention I get from going into the city. Anna didn’t realize it the other night, but I paid the restaurant ahead of time for us to be the only table in there. I had to, of course, give the owner some tickets as well.
“We can probably do something,” I answer, thinking of the fact that I haven’t even told my mom she’s going to be a grandmother yet. I figure I’ll tell her tomorrow over dinner.
“Are you still dating that girl? I always forget her name. It’s a really pretty name, but I can’t think of it. Starts with an S.”
I rub my temples. “Stassi?”
“That’s it! I see pictures of you and her in magazines sometimes.” She pauses. “Though it’s been a few weeks.” She sounds worried.
I blow out a long breath. “No, Mom, I’m not seeing her anymore. We weren’t serious anyway.”
I can practically hear her pouting through the phone. She never even met Stassi, so it isn’t like she’s attached specifically to her. She just wants her son to find someone. Little does she know, I already have.
“Mason Andrew King, eventually, you are going to want to get married and start a family. You aren’t getting any younger.”
I chuckle to myself while gazing around my daughter’s nursery. If only she knew.
“I know, Mom. Look, I’ve got to go. We’ve got an early practice tomorrow. I’ll see you when you get here.”
“This conversation isn’t over, young man! See you tomorrow. Love you.”
“Love you too.”
I hang up the phone and think of how the hell I’ll awkwardly tell her tomorrow that in a month’s time, I’ll be a dad. I feel sick, just thinking about it. I hope I don’t let her down.
forty-four
Anna
Ihobble around the apartment, putting baby stuff away and organizing everything. I suppose this is the nesting stage of pregnancy that everybody talks about. Suddenly, I feel the need to make everything ready for my sweet baby girl. In four weeks, I’ll be considered full-term. And while I’d like to carry her till forty weeks, I know that doesn’t always happen. So, I want everything as close to perfect as I can get it. Though I know that probably won’t happen once she’s here, and then I’ll realize how much I didn’t know about being a mom.
Mason called and said his mom, Sara, is in town for a week. He mentioned that sometime before she goes home, he’d like for us to meet each other. I didn’t give him an answer. I mean, how awkward would that be?
Hi, ma’am. I’m the ho who got knocked up after a very sexy weekend with your son, and now, we aren’t together. Pass the bread basket?
Yeah, no, thanks.
She’ll probably think I tried to trap him in some way. Not that I can blame her. I’m sure it does look suspicious to someone who doesn’t know our situation.
I remember Christmas is only a little over a week away, and I’ve yet to get a tree. I had every intention of it; it just hasn’t happened. Maybe I’ll go to Target and get one of those lame-ass tiny ones. Maybe I’ll be really corny about it and get pink. It’s better than nothing.
forty-five
Mason
Igive my mom the tour of my house since she’s never been here before. It’s hard for her to leave her café, and besides, I’ve been so damn busy with football that our schedules never really line up.
My hand lingers on the last door. The one leading to a purple nursery with flowery shit on the walls and white furniture with onesies—or whatever they are called—in the drawers.
I can’t stop the concerns flowing through my body. This is a big deal. What will I say? What will she say? Will she cry? Will she think I’ve lost my fucking mind? Maybe. No, scratch that. Definitely.
I take a deep breath and push the door open. My mom is still smiling when she walks in, but that quickly turns into an extremely confused look as her eyes widen and she takes in the room.
She crinkles her forehead. “I’m lost … you had this house built yourself. So, why is this room in here? Did your designer do this on accident?” Her eyes sweep around the room. “It sure is beautiful though.”
Leaning against the crib, I run a hand through my hair. Fuck, this is not going to be easy. I struggle with getting the words to come out of my mouth. “Mom … there’s a lot I need to tell you. Maybe you should sit down.” I motion toward the glider chair in the corner.
She shakes her head and scowls. “I am fine right where I am, thanks. Spill it. Because honestly, Mason, you are freaking me the hell out.”
I nod, looking down at the plush rug. This designer pulled out all the stops. “All right, all right.” Here goes. I take a deep breath and release it. “Well, in another month, you’re going to be a grandmother.”
Her face pales, and she makes her way over to the chair. “Okay, maybe sitting down isn’t such a bad idea.” She looks around for a minute and puts her hand over her mouth. “So, wait. Are you having a baby with Silvie—no, that’s not it—that Stassi girl, but you aren’t together?” Her eyes cut to mine, searching for answers.
I did just drop a bomb on the poor lady. A huge-ass atomic bomb.
I look down at the floor and then back at the woman who raised me, who knows me better than anyone. “No, Mom. The mom is a girl from NEU. Her name is Anna.”
Getting up from the chair, she paces with her hands on her neck. “And you guys what? Dated? Or—dear God, Mason, a one-night stand? And why the hell am I just finding out now if she’s that pregnant?! I mean, that’s like, almost eight months, for Pete’s sake!”
I shake my head. “It wasn’t like that, Mom. We weren’t dating, but we did spend a lot of time together. And you’re just finding out because I only just found out myself a few weeks ago.”
She looks at me and narrows her eyes, an angry expression that
, during my years on earth, I have rarely seen on her face. “Oh, right, because that’s not suspicious on her part. She’s just telling you this far in? Pfft. I don’t buy that, Mase. Sorry.”
I grimace. “She tried to tell me from the beginning, Mom. She couldn’t though.”
Her face tells me she doesn’t believe me. “Well, why the hell not?”
“Because …because I had her blocked on my phone. Okay? I fucked up, not her.” I let the F-bomb out in front of her, hoping she doesn’t slap me for it. Pretty sure she’s too preoccupied to notice my slip.
“Why would you do that to someone, Mason?” Her eyes fill with sadness, followed by disappointment. The look I was dreading.
“Because she used to be Maverick’s girl. Okay? And then he cheated on her. When he found out she and I were hanging out, he told me that her parents were going to cut ties with her if she kept talking to me because I’m a, ya know, ‘bastard child.’ ” I hold my fingers up when I say those two words. “I thought I was doing the right thing, Mom; I really did. Now, I’ve missed most of the appointments, I created abandonment and trust issues with her, and I feel like an all-around pile of dog shit. Please, don’t make me feel worse than I already do.”
She’s quiet for a minute before walking over and patting my shoulder. “Are you planning on missing any more appointments or creating any more trust issues for her?”
I vigorously shake my head. “Fuck no.”
She tilts her head to the side, narrowing her eyes to slits. No doubt irritated about my language.
“I mean, no, of course not. Sorry.”
“Good. Then, I don’t think you’re a pile of dog shit. I’d say you messed up by not going right to the source instead of listening to Maverick. But that doesn’t make you a bad person. It’s what you do now, Mase; that’s what’s important.”
I nod.
She watches me carefully before asking, “Can I ask you something?”
I shrug. “Sure, go ahead.”
“This girl … the baby’s mother, do you love her? Like, really love her?”
Playing with the scruff on my jawline, I look around the room before looking at my mother. “Yeah, Mom, I do. It just took me a while to understand it myself. But ever since we parted ways last spring, not a damn day has gone by that I don’t wonder what she’s doing. I want this. I want her, the baby, all of it. I think that since I had never been in love before, I didn’t know what I was feeling. Now, I know.”
She smiles, wiping a tear from her eye. “Well, baby, now, you’ve just got to convince her of it.”
She’s right; I know I do. But that isn’t going to be easy. Not with a firecracker like Red.
But I’ll break my back trying if it means making it right with her. I want her. Fuck, I need her.
Anna
My hands shake as my nerves get the best of me. Mason asked if I would accompany his mother to his game tonight, and even though my initial response was to laugh and say hell no, I decided maybe it wasn’t such a bad idea. Now, I’m kicking myself in the ass for not saying no.
I’m getting around on a boot now instead of crutches, and the doctor says my ankle is healing really well and the boot will soon be able to come off as well. Aside from dinner with Mason, I’ve felt pretty cooped up. Cam is coming for Christmas next week, and I can’t freaking wait. I miss the hell out of that girl. I hang out with Jill and Jodi sometimes, but it isn’t the same sort of friendship as Cameran and I have.
Making my way outside, I see a fancy SUV pull up alongside my apartment.
An older man pushes his door open and steps out. “Hello, Anna. I’m Richard. I’ll be driving you today.” His warm smile is infectious. He radiates good energy, which eases my nerves slightly.
I smile back but tilt my chin up at him and put one hand on my hip. “All right, Richard, I have but one question for you. What’s the magic word?”
He chuckles softly, his cheeks reddening with each passing second. He steps forward and says quietly, “Though I can’t understand for the life of me why this would be anyone’s secret password, it’s”—he swallows hard, obviously so embarrassed—“Titty Monster.”
I burst out laughing. When I told Mason I was not getting in a stranger’s car without a password, he texted me the password twenty minutes later. I almost objected, but come on, that shit’s funny. He’s nicknamed our daughter, who isn’t even born yet, Titty Monster. Who even does that? Oh, right, Mason King.
“All right, Richard, let’s roll,” I say with a satisfied grin.
We go through a beautiful gate before starting down a gorgeous, long, paved driveway. Trees lining the entire way. When we get to the end, I can’t believe my eyes as we come to a stop in front of Mason’s house. It’s huge. But that’s not even what makes it so stunning. It’s everything about it. From the landscaping out front to the eye-catching red front door. Everything—and I mean, everything—looks so carefully thought out.
A tiny voice inside my head says, Bet your mother would love this. Wouldn’t she? Bet this would make Mason almost as acceptable as Maverick.
I shake it off. Part of me hates even being impressed with this house. Because I fear that it’s in my blood to be materialistic, like them. And I don’t want to be like that. I like my apartment. It is far from tiny, but it’s certainly not huge either. It’s modern, edgy, and simple. Like me. I want my daughter to grow up somewhere modest and see that not everyone has nice things, but it doesn’t make them less than. I want her to learn lessons that I never learned and not learn some that I did. If I allow her to live somewhere like this with her dad part-time, will she grow and turn into my family? God, I hope not.
A woman I recognize from Maverick’s grandmother’s funeral in the Hamptons steps outside and waves to the driver. Although Mason looks a lot like his dad, he certainly looks like her too. She’s absolutely stunning. He got his smile from her along with her bright blue eyes. Something about her is welcoming.
Richard opens the door, and she slides into the seat next to me.
Smiling, she holds her hand out. “Hi there. I’m Sara. It’s nice to meet you. Wow, you look adorable!” She signals to my belly.
I take her hand and shake it before releasing it and placing mine over my pregnant stomach. “Thank you. I’m Anna. It’s nice to meet you as well.”
“So, how has your pregnancy been? Have you enjoyed it much? I honestly hated pregnancy. I was so sick the entire time,” she says as she scrunches her nose.
“The first trimester, I was pretty nauseous. Luckily, it got better. Other than the ankle, it’s been good,” I say honestly.
I know some women have backaches and everything else, but for me, it hasn’t been too bad. If anything, carrying this baby makes me feel less alone in the world.
“Oh, sweetie, that’s great to hear. I hope you don’t mind me saying this, but I am over-the-moon excited. I will help you in any way that I can.” She takes my hand and looks me in the eyes. “You’ve got this covered. I can see you’re a strong girl just from what my boy has told me. And he doesn’t trust many people, so I know what he says is true. But it’s still nice to have people in your corner, and I’d like to be in your corner. If you’ll have me, that is.”
Overwhelmed by her kindness, I swallow a hard lump in my throat. I don’t like showing emotion in front of people. I nod before finally choking out, “Of course. I’d love that.” I pray for my eyes to hold in the moisture I feel building from her kind words.
I assumed she would be upset with me. In her eyes, I should be the tramp who got knocked up by her very successful son. I’m aware that it screams gold digger. But I have money of my own in a savings account. Though I’m sure no one else knows that. It’s just nice to have someone want to be there for me.
My whole life has basically been about who can appear the shiniest. Who has the nicest things. Who buys the most expensive outfits and cars. But in reality, that isn’t me. It’s comforting to be around someone who wants to be the
re for me and the baby without me having to be perfect.
Then again, it is her granddaughter. So, of course, she wants to be there for her and Mason. My heart sinks. She probably doesn’t care about getting to know me. She just wants my baby.
What if she tries to take my baby away?
No. I fight those thoughts off. Not everyone is bad, Anna. Calm yourself down. Get a grip.
Mason
I know Anna’s here. I can feel it. The thought of her and my daughter this time next year, cheering me on from the stands, wearing matching jerseys with my last name on the back … wow. That brings a stupid-ass grin to my face right here on this field as we warm up. Then, my mind shifts to Anna wearing nothing besides my jersey at home after we put the baby to sleep and can be alone. I shift around; now is not the time to get a boner.
I was a little nervous about her and Mom meeting today, especially without me being there. But I know my mom, and she’ll do nothing but try to make Anna comfortable. And Anna, well, even if my mom had a mean bone in her body, which she doesn’t, Anna can hold her own. No doubt about that. Though I know some of that is nothing but an act. Deep down inside, I think she’s a second away from breaking down. How could she not be? Her own family abandoned her. I can’t imagine the pain she must carry around. Though you’d never know it by looking at her.
I hope they don’t run into my father and stepmother though. Not because I’m embarrassed of Anna or anything like that, but because it would make for an extremely awkward situation, and I don’t want to put Anna in any of those. Especially while she’s so pregnant. Also, while my father would be polite to her, I can’t say the same for my stepmother.
I hope our daughter gets that same fieriness that her mother has. That kind of fire? Well, you need it in today’s world to survive. A lot of people who have been through what she has, they’d use it as an excuse to never try to be better or do better. With Anna, it only makes that fire inside of her grow. She wants to do everything for this baby because she never had anyone like that. My dad was never around much when I was growing up, but you can bet your ass I will be for my daughter.
