‘No! I want to know why you’re still here! Were you spying on me? My God, even Addie didn’t think she had to wait up and see me home.’
‘Because I offered,’ he countered logically. ‘You told me to get her to go to sleep. She wouldn’t unless I waited up for you.’
Torey gnashed her teeth. ‘That’s absurd. If she was worried you could have just waited until she was asleep, then gone home.’
Jake shrugged. ‘I didn’t mind.’ He was looking at her as though she was the unreasonable one. ‘Sure you wouldn’t like some coffee?’ He turned on the kettle and settled into one of the chairs.
‘Help yourself,’ Torey said. ‘I’m going to bed.’
‘Can’t. Scott’s in there.’
‘Take him home then!’
‘All in good time,’ Jake soothed. ‘Why don’t you just sit down like a good girl and tell me all about Prince Charming?’
‘Prince Charming is none of your business!’
‘Where’d you go to eat?’ he persisted.
‘I said, “It’s none of your business.” ’
‘Not even where you ate?’ Jake sounded wounded to the quick.
‘A Mexican place on Pacific Coast Highway,’ Torey spat out.
‘I didn’t know you liked Mexican food.’
‘What you don’t know about me would fill volumes,’ Torey said, resisting the interest she saw in the cool, blue eyes and tapping her fingers nervously on the table.
‘True,’ Jake conceded. ‘But I’m learning. I want to learn, Torey’ He leaned forward fixing her intently with his gaze.
‘Why?’ Torey asked hoarsely, staring at the clock over his right shoulder. It was the witching hour. The kettle whistled and Jake got up and made himself a cup of coffee with the concentration of a cordon bleu chef. Torey wondered if he hadn’t heard the question.
‘Because I’m attracted to you,’ he said finally, turning back and watching her with hooded eyes. ‘And you are afraid of me.’
‘I am not.’
He looked sceptical. ‘You’ve been running in the other direction since you got off that plane. Why? You used to want me.’
Torey hoped fervently that the light was dim enough to hide the colour flooding into her cheeks. ‘That was years ago,’ she stammered. ‘I was a stupid, innocent child.’
‘And now you’re a big, brave woman,’ Jake jeered. ‘So why are you running away?’
‘Did it ever occur to your conceited ego that I might have got two cents worth of sense over the past seven years? I met Paul and I found out what true love really is. And what it’s not.’ She slipped her plait back indignantly. ‘And I have no intention of settling for less the second time around.’
‘Take that,’ Jake said with tightly controlled lightness which was belied by the whitened knuckles clutching his coffee mug.
‘Enjoy your coffee,’ Torey said frostily. ‘I will carry Scott up to your place myself.’ Turning on her heel she walked out of the kitchen. She was about to lift Scott’s limp form from her bed when Jake shoved past her.
‘Don’t strain yourself,’ he muttered and hoisting his son easily in his arm, he strode out of the room, an anger she didn’t completely comprehend emanating from him.
Torey followed him through the kitchen, noting the jerkiness of his movements as he shouldered his way out the door. ‘Can I help?’ she offered.
‘No.’ His voice was rough. Then he growled, ‘Pleasant dreams,’ and kicked the door shut behind him.
Pleasant dreams ha, Torey thought as she slipped into bed a few moments later and felt the small warm spot where Scott had lain as though it were an ache deep inside her. Were there such things as pleasant dreams any more? She sighed, hugging her pillow and feeling a desperate loneliness she hadn’t experienced since the first raw days of missing Paul. That had been real love, true love. But was it the only kind there was? Would she even recognise it if she found it again? And could she possibly find it the second time around?
CHAPTER SIX
Sounds of Chopsticks interspersed with Peter, Peter, Pumpkin Eater woke her. Torey yawned and stretched, letting the childish melody wash over her like the warmth of the late morning sun angling through her window and casting a white glare across Paul’s picture. She smiled over at him as she did every morning, though she could barely see him because of the reflection. She lay back and tried to remember weekend mornings when he would get up to do the milking and she would make coffee, and then they would take the morning paper and cups of coffee and sneak back to bed. But not to read. She rubbed the cool sheet against her cheek, her eyes pressed shut, trying to recall the feel of him, the warmth. Her throat tightened and she swallowed hard, realising that the lips she was recalling were not Paul’s, but Jake’s hard and persuasive against her own.
Damn him! She flung back the covers and got up. Peter, Peter continued relentlessly in the living room. No wonder she couldn’t rid herself of images of Jake—his son was in the house that very moment. Perhaps Jake was too. She hoped not.
Nevertheless, she took pains to do her hair up in a neat plait and then put on a sunny yellow terry jumpsuit that made her look far more confident and cheerful than she felt. She needed all the psychological advantages she could get when she faced Jake Brosnan. Finally giving in to the smell of coffee and bacon she squared her shoulders and left her room.
Scott had switched to Heart and Soul now, and Torey thought that if she didn’t add to his repertoire soon, it was going to be a very long summer. ‘He stopped when she appeared and grinned. ‘Good. You’re up. Wanta go to the beach?’
‘Hello to you, too,’ she said lightly, looking around carefully as if Jake might pop out of the broom closet at any moment. But he was nowhere to be seen.
‘Have some breakfast,’ Addie suggested, nodding to the stove where a plate of bacon sat, still warm. ‘Thought the smell of it might get you up. Scott’s been waiting for you to go to the beach with him,’ she added as Torey forked bacon on to her plate and popped bread in the toaster.
‘Why doesn’t Jake take him?’
‘Jake’s working,’ Addie said complacently. ‘Anyway, I’m sure you won’t mind. I told him you wouldn’t.’
I’ll bet you did, Torey thought glumly. Probably arranged the whole thing. She wrinkled her nose in annoyance. But then she caught Scott’s eye and saw his lower lip jut out in disappointment, just as though he knew what she was thinking. It wasn’t fair to take his father’s sins out on him. ‘I don’t mind,’ she said, giving Scott a warm smile. ‘We can go down right after I put in the laundry.’
‘Great!’ Scott’s face lit up and he dashed back to the living room. ‘I’ll play the piano ‘till you’re ready.’ Peter, Peter began again with tremendous enthusiasm, and Torey finished her toast to its rousing accompaniment. The rhyme reverberated in her head, ‘Had a wife and couldn’t keep her’. Like Jake? she wondered. Why hadn’t he been able to keep her, whoever she was? Surely a son like Scott would have been difficult to leave. Torey would have adored having a son like him. It was just Jake manipulating her into caring for Scott that she resented.
But then, she thought as she loaded the washing machine, maybe that’s how Jake’s wife felt too. Maybe he had gone off to ‘work’ and had left her all the time, too. What work was he doing? Painting and sketching for his dragon book? She doubted it. He liked solitude for that; and warm southern California weekends like this one brought people to the beaches in droves. No, more likely he was ‘working’ on his current relationship with some woman, enjoying himself without the encumbrance of his five-year-old son.
As much as she resented Jake’s having thrust Scott on her (with Addie’s blessing, she admitted grudgingly), she thoroughly enjoyed their day at the beach together. Scott was outgoing, introducing Torey to lots of people. She even found herself agreeing to meet one young man for a beer that evening, hoping that he might become a friend like Gino or even more, like Paul. Not, she thought, like Jake.
They
returned to Addie’s just past four and she persuaded Scott to rest for a while, annoyed to note that Jake still wasn’t back. Taking a quick shower she joined Addie in the living room where her grandmother was sitting in her rocker and doing the Times crossword puzzle.
‘What’s a four-letter word for irritating,’ Addie asked.
‘Jake,’ Torey supplied instantly, then flushed as Addie’s eyes fastened on her with eagle-like perception. ‘Well, I mean, why isn’t he back yet? Does he think I have nothing better to do all day than take care of Scott so he can mess around?’
‘Jake’s not messing around,’ Addie said in mildly reproving tones.
‘I’ll bet,’ Torey muttered. She avoided Addie’s gaze, then turned and hurried into the kitchen, returning with a duster. With great concentration she removed the acre of family portraits from the top of the piano and began to dust. ‘You need to do your exercises, Gran,’ she said, changing the subject.
‘Tonight,’ Addie promised. ‘While you and Jake are ...’
Torey spun around, hands on hips, her green eyes flashing fire. ‘Gran, Jake and I are not doing anything tonight! I already have a date.’
‘You let some stranger pick you up on the beach?’ Addie sounded shocked.
‘Scott knew him,’ Torey said defensively, taking a savage swipe with the duster.
Addie looked unconvinced. ‘I’ll ask Jake about him,’ she decided.
‘You will not!’ Torey knocked her parents’ 25th anniversary photo on to the floor. She heard the screen door bang.
‘What won’t Addie do?’ Jake asked, appearing in the doorway with two large boxes of fish and chips in his hands. His face was sunburned, his dark hair still damp from the shower, and his silvery blue eyes sparkling with interest and amusement. Almost overpowered by her attraction to him, Torey jerked back and went on with her dusting, saying,
‘Never mind.’
‘Torey has a new young man,’ Addie began.
Jake frowned. ‘Who?’ His voice was a growl and he banged the boxes down on the coffee table and dragged it over in front of Addie’s chair. ‘Help yourself,’ he said to her. Then, ‘What young man?’
‘Gran,’ Torey began warningly.
‘She met someone at the beach today and she says she’s going out with him,’ Addie explained. ‘Do you think it’s a good idea?’
‘Hell no. What do you know about him?’ he demanded, turning towards Torey, his eyes locking with hers.
Torey flicked the duster impatiently. ‘For heaven’s sake, I’m not your daughter! Scott introduced us. His name is Tony Bates.’
Jake rolled his eyes. ‘And you think I’m a wolf?’
‘He seemed perfectly nice.’
‘Oh sure. He probably thinks you will be too,’ Jake leered. There was no doubt what he meant by ‘nice’. It brought back memories of their disastrous first date, and Torey felt her cheeks burn.
‘Drop it,’ she snapped. ‘Just eat your fish and leave me alone.’ She turned to go to her bedroom, but Jake caught her arm.
‘Sit down and eat.’ It was almost an order. Torey longed to snap back at him or jerk away, but she saw Addie watching them with undisguised interest and decided that sitting down and eating his damned fish was a more mature reaction than stomping off in a huff.
‘Thank you,’ she said with tightly controlled violence. ‘I will.’
Apparently as willing as she was to let the matter drop, at least for the moment, Jake turned the topic to Addie’s exercises and once Scott had emerged, there was no lack of conversational topics. He catalogued everything he and Torey had done that day and Torey found herself blushing again and avoiding Jake’s clear gaze of approval. It’s only that you’re useful to him, she reminded herself, before she could read something more into it. And to defend herself further she looked at him over the chips box and said tartly,
‘I suppose you had a hard day on the beach as well.’
‘It’s always hard when it’s crowded,’ he said, which surprised her. She thought he’d deny being there at all. Irritated, she finished her dinner in silence, letting Scott’s chatter wash over her, not really hearing what was said, wishing her grandmother hadn’t mentioned her date with Tony to Jake. When she got up to carry the boxes into the kitchen he followed her and shut the door behind them. ‘What bar are you going to?’ he asked once they were alone.
‘What makes you think it’s a bar?’ she demanded, though it was.
‘With Tony it always is. Listen, Torey,’ his expression was one of earnestness, like a big brother trying to prevent his little sister from making a ‘big mistake’. She wanted to smack him. ‘Some of these bars—and these guys—are way out of your league.’
‘Out of my league!’ she spluttered. ‘You hypocritical prig! I am not some naive little hayseed anymore! So just take your opinions and put them where they’ll do you the most good!’
‘It’s not me who needs them doing him good,’ Jake said evenly. ‘It’s you. But I might’ve known you’d be too damned stubborn to take any advice.’ His light eyes were boring into her and she turned away, grabbing the boxes off the table.
‘From you any advice is questionable,’ she said coldly as she shredded the boxes into the bin, wishing they were Jake.
Jake sighed and shook his head. ‘Suit yourself,’ he muttered, then turned and walked out of the kitchen, letting the door bang shut behind him.
Damn him, oh damn him! Torey wiped angry tears from her eyes, glad he hadn’t seen them. He treated her like she was seven years old and, she thought angrily, sometimes that’s about how old he made her feel! Well, tonight she would show him! She had changed since she was seventeen. She might not have been able to handle wolves then, but she knew she could now! She crammed the lid on the bin and went back into the living room to find Jake listening to another of Scott’s stories about their day.
‘Wish I’d been there,’ he said and ruffled his son’s hair.
I’ll bet, Torey thought and lifted her brows with a sceptical look that was designed to let Jake know he wasn’t fooling her.
He just grinned unrepentantly. ‘Lying on the beach all day, soaking up the rays. What a life!’ he said with a teasing glint in his eyes.
‘So much softer than yours,’ she retorted sarcastically. ‘Did you work very hard, Jake?’ she asked with false sympathy, curling into the big chair next to the window.
‘It was rough,’ he said seriously, and rubbed a weary hand inside the collar of his navy blue polo shirt. Torey looked at him, startled, but then she decided that, despite his serious tones he must have heard her sarcasm and, unable to defend against it, had decided that the best response was none at all.
‘What a pity,’ she mocked. ‘Since you’re so tired you’ll need an early night, won’t you?’
Jake’s eyebrows lifted, then drew together into a frown, but he didn’t reply.
‘Come and play catch, Dad?’ Scott implored, tugging at his father’s arm.
‘All right.’ Jake allowed himself to be pulled to his feet. Unwillingly Torey let her eyes travel up the long length of his body wishing that he weren’t so damned attractive. He still wore a pair of blue jeans better than anyone she had ever seen. Even the muscular farm boys at home—even Paul—didn’t have quite the same attractiveness that Jake did. She jerked her gaze away, concentrating instead on the bare toes in the thongs he wore. Damn, even his toes were sexy.
‘Wanta come along, Torey?’ he asked, reaching down to yank on her plait as though she were a child.
‘Thank you, no. I’ll just get cleaned up for my date.’ She mustered all her poise and shaped it into a sweet smile which she bestowed on him through tightly clenched jaws.
Jake muttered something rude under his breath and raked a hand through his thick black hair disgustedly. ‘I’ll be back pretty quick,’ he told Addie. Giving Torey a fiery glance that spoke volumes more than she cared to read into it, he banged out of the house and she heard his thongs slapping down the pa
vement as he followed Scott to the beach.
‘You do try his patience, dear,’ Addie said mildly, giving Torey a reproving glance before picking up the television guide and flipping through it to find out what was on.
‘I? I try his patience?’ Torey almost laughed. ‘He—I—I have been taking care of his child all day while he’s been out ... out ... Oh, who the hell cares where he’s been! And now he comes home and acts like some stern father when he finds out I’m going out for beer with some man he probably hardly even knows!’ She jumped up and crossed to the bay window, glaring out at his back disappearing down the street.
‘Jake is a good judge of character, Victoria,’ Addie said; ‘You should listen to him.’
‘And so whatever he says, I suppose?’ Torey replied scathingly. Would Addie think she ought to go to bed with him if Jake thought it was a good idea? Or would Addie even believe that dear sainted Jake ever took a woman to his bed? Torey felt like clawing the curtains. Instead she gnawed her bottom lip until it nearly bled before she calmed down enough to say, ‘I think I’ll just take Maynard for a walk for an hour or so, before I go to meet Tony.’
‘You’ll be back before you go to meet this ... this, um ... this young man, won’t you?’ Addie asked, her disapproval evident.
‘Yes,’ Torey promised, putting a leash on Maynard and heading out the door, ‘I just need to clear my head.’
Scour my mind. Scrub it clean. Rid it of all thoughts of Jake Brosnan. She walked along Ocean Drive until she was out of the immediate vicinity of where Jake and Scott would be playing ball on the beach, then she cut down to The Strand and walked south towards Hermosa Beach, the evening sun casting long shadows before her as she walked. The breeze ruffled her hair, making her think of Jake’s fingers tugging on her plait, toying with the loose strands. Stop it, she told herself, and began purposefully to concentrate on the sight of joggers loping along the hard-packed sand near the water, the surfers silhouetted at the breaker line, and the bicyclists who whizzed along the bike path, deftly threading their way through skateboarders and roller skaters. How different from Galena it was. Another world. Even she was different. Free. More alive. As if the emotions she had kept in mothballs since Paul had died, were once more in use again. And it didn’t take a genius to figure out who was responsible.
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