by Mignon Mykel
I stepped aside and let him in. It wasn’t like we were going to have a nice chat in the middle of the night on two sides of the door.
Before I could even shut the door behind him, Caleb had me turned and pressed into the door, it latching at my back. His hands were framing my face and his mouth was on mine.
Hungry.
My lips parted when his tongue pressed. My jaw stayed open, allowing him access into my mouth. My hands were trapped at my sides, but eventually I placed them on his hips, pulling and tugging at his shirt.
Frantic.
That’s what this was.
Hands were everywhere, tearing clothes off one another until eventually we were both naked and on the bed. There wasn’t a pause, there wasn’t a moment to breathe; he was in me the moment my back hit the bed and it was wonderfully intoxicating.
This wasn’t sweet.
But it also wasn’t rough.
It was as if he had been just as torn up about today as I had been. It was both of us not wanting tomorrow to come, but having it forced at us a day early.
I could feel him swelling inside me as he pounded into me relentlessly. He was nearing his end, but I wanted it to last. I didn’t want this night to end.
I reached between us so I could rub circles over my clit, needing to release with him. He seemed to understand, because soon his mouth was no longer over mine but on my neck, my shoulder, then up to below my ear, where he nipped gently and sucked away the hurt.
The very place my body was torn between tickle and arousal.
He did it once more and I flew, my body shaking, and a shout on my lips.
His name, over and over.
My knees squeezed his hips as my body fought to calm; I removed my fingers from myself and put my hands on his well-defined ass, still pounding into me. Two more thrusts and his body stilled over me, his muscles tight, a grunt then my name on his own lips.
Blissfully satisfied, I closed my eyes, relishing his weight on top of me.
Caleb
“I am not saying goodbye to you,” I said sometime later, my fingers grazing up and down her arm lightly as she lay curled into me, her head on my chest. Seeing the heartbreak on her face mirror the ache in my chest had about done me in. I didn’t come here intending to get action, but there was a weight lifted from my shoulders all the same.
“But the show…”
“These shows have deceit and twists all the time. I’ll get through it, and then I’m coming to you.” I turned my head so my lips rested on top of her head.
“But I’m in Utah. You’re in California. Or Wisconsin. Just not Utah.”
“We’re going to make this work, Sydney,” I said quietly into her hair. I hadn’t found the woman who made me want what my parents had, just for her to walk away and never see her again.
“Ok,” she whispered into the dark. “But if you find someone… If someone makes you feel anything, please don’t hold out for me. Give the woman a chance.”
She would be worried about the contestants.
“No promises, Syd.”
She didn’t respond, but I could feel her need to fight the issue. “I found someone who makes me feel something,” I told her. “I had a conversation with my dad just before boarding about how you couldn’t possibly find love in a week, a month. It takes time. But what I feel for you, Syd? It’s unlike anything I’ve felt before. I can see you meeting my siblings. I can see you hanging out with the family. Just like I can see myself meeting your family. I want that, Syd.”
I continued my slow graze up and down her arm. She settled a little deeper into me, running her palm back and forth slowly, lightly, over my side.
Finally, she broke the silence with her quiet voice. “Tony had a conversation with me when he picked up your phone.”
When she didn’t elaborate, I lifted my head slightly to look down at her. It was dark in the room, but I could make her out just fine.
“More than just, ‘you have Caleb’s phone’?”
She nodded but stayed quiet. I gave Sydney her moment and reached up to pull her bun out. It was well and true a mess now. When I wasn’t able to pull the band out with one hand, I reached over her head with both hands to try and get the band out without pulling her hair. Mission accomplished, I put the band on the nightstand beside me before urging her again.
“What did he say to you, Chief?” Her hair fell in thick, crazy waves around her shoulders, falling over to my chest. I ran my fingers through the length.
She sighed quietly and I felt her shrug. “I don’t think he could actually do anything, but he basically threatened me. If the show doesn’t work, he’s coming after me. But like I said, I don’t think he can truly do anything.”
I thought about it for a moment, trying to keep the red at bay. “If,” I started, emphasizing the word. “If he does, you’ll have nothing to worry about. We will get through it.”
Again she nodded, followed by a deep sigh. I allowed my eyes to close and just before I fell off that edge of sleep, I heard the best words whispered toward me.
“I can see all that, too.”
This morning when I woke, Sydney was still in my arms. I don’t think either of us moved much while sleeping; we were in the same positions as when we fell asleep, her head on my chest, my hand on her hip. The only difference was Sydney’s legs were further entwined with mine and her hand that was once on my hip…
Well, it was resting on my morning wood.
How I didn’t notice when I first woke was beyond me, but after seeing her hand there? I was getting harder for a whole different reason.
I was going to let her rest though, as much as my lower anatomy wanted otherwise. I had woken her up a few hours ago after a dream where I couldn’t find her. I made slow, sweet love to this woman; there was no other way to explain it. I took my time with her body, and when she was finally quivering under me, I entered her slowly, keeping my hips at a slow pace.
Thinking about it now though, I realized belatedly I didn’t bring condoms with me when I came over. I squeezed the bridge of my nose between my thumb and index finger. Sydney stirred at the loss of my hand on her hip.
Fuck me.
I always used a condom. How was it I barebacked with her and hadn’t noticed the difference?
Easy.
I was wrapped up in every other feeling that the day had brought on.
I sighed heavily and looked up at the ceiling.
If she wasn’t protected…
It wasn’t like I was worried about catching something from her, or even her from me. I was clean. I just didn’t want her to have to deal with an unwanted pregnancy.
She didn’t ask for babies.
My mind flashed a picture of a boy who looked like me and a girl who looked like her. We would make cute babies…I chuckled lightly to myself.
Which was just enough movement to wake her apparently.
“What’s funny?” she said groggily.
I sobered up quickly, trying to figure out how to say it. I didn’t want my last hours with her to be strained, either.
“I didn’t use a condom last night.”
Still groggy, she nodded against my chest. “Mmm. I know.” She buried her nose into my chest and took a deep breath through her nose.
Was it because she was upset? Or was she attempting to suffocate herself against my chest hair, and having a hard time breathing through her nose pressed hard against me.
“Talk to me, Syd,” I said. I could hear the slight edge of panic in my voice as I rubbed my hand up and down her arm to get her to wake up more.
She propped her chin on my chest and gave me a sleepy smile. “It’s ok, Caleb. I’m on the pill. Don’t worry; I won’t show up on your door in nine months, baby in arm.” She leaned up to press her lips lightly to mine.
“I’ve never—”
She broke me off with another small press of her lips to mine. “It’s ok, Caleb. I can’t say I have either, but regardless if you have or hav
en’t, I trust you. I mean…You are clean, right?”
There was a quick flash of doubt in her eyes.
“Of course I am.”
“Ok. Then we’re fine. We use ‘em, we don’t use ‘em…” She shrugged. “It’ll be fine.” This time when she put her lips to mine, she lingered. She pulled back before I could get her mouth open, though. “Morning breath, bud. No good kisses till it’s dealt with.”
“I have fantastic morning breath,” I joked, grateful for the break in tension.
“I’m sure you do. Just like you probably only fart roses, and B.O. isn’t a part of your lifestyle. I have brothers, Caleb.” She tapped my chest in the way she did, before pushing up to stand. I racked my eyes over her naked body as she stood. She may have been small just about everywhere, but it worked incredibly well for her. Between her body and her mind, I honestly thought I could be happy forever with what Sydney offered.
Forever.
There was that word again.
I laughed at the guys getting married in their early twenties. I tried not to say I told you so to them when they were divorcing years later, too. I always thought I would wait until I was closer to retirement to do the marriage and kid thing but I didn’t bank on being freight-trained by a five-two pixie that made me smile, made me laugh, when I was just past two seasons into my career.
I knew of young marriages that didn’t work out when half of the couple was on the road most of the time. My parents were the exception. I wanted what my parents had, yes, but the statistics simply weren’t there.
What I saw in myself when I was around Sydney though, was what I saw when my dad looked at my mom. I could see my relationship with Sydney being as strong and solid as theirs.
Yeah. I could definitely see it.
But could it withstand my upcoming obligations?
Sydney
It was hard to stay happy and jovial knowing that I was leaving soon. I knew what, or rather who, Caleb was going to encounter by the end of the day and I didn’t stand a chance. Sure, he may have been content with what I had to offer him this week, but once he got a look at the women he’d be spending time with over the next month?
Sydney Meadows would just be a piece of his past.
And I was trying really hard to be ok with that.
Sure, he said he was just going to get through the show and find me, and he refused to promise me to give the girls a chance but come on already, he was Caleb Prescott, son of hockey great, Noah Prescott, left wing of the San Diego Enforcers. A hockey player who had been seen a few times with some model or actress on his arm. He went to sport functions and had done talks on television for NHL Live.
Little Sydney Meadows just couldn’t compete in that world.
I was pulled from my internal pity party when he slapped my bare ass.
When we rolled out of the tiny bed in my room earlier, which was really just two twin beds pushed together, unlike the King mattress in Caleb’s suite, Caleb pulled on his shorts from the night before and tossed me his shirt.
It smelled like him.
I wondered idly if I could somehow manage to keep it.
Creeper, much?
We were now in my tiny bathroom brushing our teeth, him in just shorts and me in just his shirt.
Well, it looked like it was just me brushing my teeth, anyway. Apparently Caleb finished sometime during my party for one.
I moved my eyes to his in the mirror. I raised my brow, trying for cool, but decidedly failed when toothpaste dribbled from the corner of my mouth.
I spit in the sink just as Caleb rubbed his hand over the sting he created. “Penny for your thoughts, Chief.”
I attempted a smile at him after patting my face with a towel. “All’s good.”
“Nah, it’s not,” he said before putting his hands on my hips. I’m embarrassed to say I squeaked a little when he lifted me to the counter, setting my bare bottom on the cold counter.
He stepped close as he pulled me to the edge and I wrapped my arms around his neck loosely. My legs snaked around his hips and I put my cheek to his cheek, enjoying this close moment. I gave Caleb major props for not making this moment sexual because at this very moment, I really just needed a hug.
I dropped my forehead to his shoulder and his arms tightened around me. His arms nearly wrapped double around me but I loved the safety I felt in them.
He turned his face in so his lips were to my ear. “I’m going to miss you so damn much, Syd.”
I could have come up with some quick retort, brushed him off with some comment about being too busy to miss me, but I knew he was being serious. It was in his tone of voice, in the way he held me close.
So instead I just nodded.
I’d known him hardly more than a week, if you really thought about it, but already my head and heart were so far gone over him. I never felt this way before.
Was it the forbidden? The knowledge I couldn’t have him? That as soon as I left this ship in a matter of an hour or two, I could, and would, be replaced?
Is that why this hurt so much?
Because surely, there was no way I could have truly fallen in love with him after spending seven straight days with him.
That was just…
Asinine!
I was a usually-level headed, bright young woman. I knew better than to believe in romance stories and rom-com movies. They simply weren’t the truth.
But what else could explain the tears building behind my eyes, the fear that once I walked out of this room for good, I would be leaving behind more than just a week of memories?
Finally, I whispered into the now silent space. “You should probably go.”
It killed me to say it, but I didn’t want this to be harder than it already was.
I was going to have to unwind my limbs from his body, but I’d hold on a second longer, just until he took a step away from me.
Instead, his arms tightened impossibly more, as if he didn’t want to ever let go.
Caleb
“You should probably go.”
Instead, I wrapped my arms tighter. It didn’t matter that there was a melancholy note in the air. It didn’t matter that she was leaving. Distance makes the heart grow fonder and that jazz, right?
But those things did matter.
Her here, in my arms? That was what truly mattered, where I wanted my attention focused right now.
I knew I had to leave. She had to put together the last of her things and leave to go home. I shouldn’t keep her from doing that.
The longer I stood here holding her, the more I honestly wanted to say screw the show. I’m sure there would be some sort of repercussion, but nothing could be as bad as watching Sydney walk away.
I pressed my lips to her shoulder again and I could feel wetness on my shoulder. I pulled away so I could lift her face to mine, my thumbs brushing at the tears on her cheeks. “Don’t cry, Syd. Four weeks. They’ll come and go, and then I’m on the first flight to Utah to come see you.”
Her sad eyes looked into mine, my big hands framing her face. “Don’t make promises you can’t keep, Caleb,” she said quietly.
“I can damn well make and keep that promise, Chief.” I brushed a thumb over the apple of her cheek.
“That’s just it, though. You can’t, Caleb. After the month is up, everyone’s going to be watching your every move to see who you spend time with, to make guesses before the show airs. Then there will be media appearances and magazine shoots. You can’t just say whatever and fly out to see me.”
I brought her face close so I could kiss her forehead before dropping my hands to her hips. Shrugging, I said, “Then I’ll just tell Tony I can’t do the show. Easy.”
Her eyes widened but not from excitement. “You’re going to lose out on endorsements and charity funds, Caleb! Did you not read the contract?”
To be honest, no. Not completely.
“I have money. I can back my own charity funding.” Not the best retort, but it was what I had
.
Still, she shook her head. “No. Caleb…” She sighed heavily, shaky from her brief tears. “Do the show. Do your media tour. If, after all is said and done, things don’t work out with whatever girl you choose, then come find me. Minimum of three months, Caleb. I will not talk to you a moment before then.”
She tried so hard to be levelheaded, my pixie redhead.
But three months just wasn’t going to happen.
“Sydney. No. I’m not waiting three damn months to talk to you.” My hands flexed against her hips.
Her arms that had been draped around my neck now dropped and her hands rested on my chest. Her fingers softly grazed through the hair there before gently brushing over my nipples. I’m sure she wasn’t intending the reaction, but I hardened against her all the same.
She raised a brow in response.
“Really, Caleb? We’re supposed to be having a serious conversation.”
“I am being serious. It’s you, Syd. You’re it. I didn’t believe that this show was going to do anything for me. But I couldn’t get you out of my head from that first meeting in the tunnel. I’m falling in—”
Her hand cupped my mouth and both her brows were raised. A small look of panic was in her eyes, but at least the amber depths were alive again.
“Don’t say that.” The panic was in her voice too. “Please don’t make this harder than it already is.”
My eyes searched hers, allowing the quiet to seep in. Finally, I nodded and she removed her hand. “Ok,” I said. “It doesn’t change it, though.”
Her soft, “I know,” was barely audible but it was there.
I wrapped my arms around her one last time and whispered in her ear, “Don’t push me out, Syd baby. I’ll see you soon.”
I felt her nod and after taking a deep breath in of her, memorizing her scent and the feel of her limbs wrapped around me, I stepped away. Her legs dropped from my hips so her heels hit the cabinets below her. Her arms slowly released from my shoulders and she placed them neatly in her lap.
She wasn’t the first girl I had left, but she was the first girl I left that had me feeling like I was leaving a piece of me behind. She sat there on the sink top in just my shirt, her thick, wavy red hair around a shoulder, and her face tearstained.
