‘So you don’t miss any of the match, you mean?’
‘Don’t be daft,’ Aaron grinned. ‘It’s half time.’
Charley looked up as a light went on in Ella’s kitchen, heard water gushing from a tap. She hoped she was making black coffee to clear her head. Charley knew the drinking was a coping mechanism; she’d seen it so many times in her job. And if she was going to figure out if Ella needed help, she had to know some of what she was dealing with first. Even if she couldn’t do anything for her, maybe she could signpost Ella towards someone or some agency that could. She was a sweet person when she was happy. It was a shame that she couldn’t be like that more of the time.
She wondered what had happened to make her drink so much again, and why she had to be so rude to Aaron all the time. For some reason, she seemed threatened by his maleness.
What was her background? Was she one of the lonely souls who lived forgotten after a traumatic childhood, trying to get through their lives, pushing the right people away, clinging on to the wrong people for affection? Or maybe Ella was a manic depressive, her mood swings a constant. It didn’t all stack up yet. Charley hated it when she didn’t have answers to all her questions.
Aaron’s hand slipped inside her top and she tingled at his touch on her skin. He drew her into his arms and kissed her passionately, leaving her breathless. She pressed herself into him, not wanting to end the embrace. God, she couldn’t get enough of him – his scent, his taste, his touch.
Yet, as they went back inside afterwards, her thoughts quickly returned to Ella. It wasn’t pleasant to see her so unhappy, especially because she knew exactly how lonely she’d be.
Charley had only recently got rid of that feeling herself.
Chapter Twenty
Charley grinned when she heard her phone beep the next morning. Aaron hadn’t left until two a.m. She hadn’t wanted him to go last night, nor did she suspect that he’d been too eager to leave, but it didn’t seem right yet to spend every night together. Taking it slowly was good for her, even though her heart wanted to rule her head. Or was that still lust…She knew the dizzy feelings wouldn’t last forever.
But the message wasn’t from Aaron: it was from Ella.
‘You were with him again last night. You should have been there for me. I needed someone to talk to.’
Charley sighed. She wasn’t going to reply to that; Ella was most probably still drunk from the night before. If she ignored it, maybe Ella wouldn’t even recall sending it.
She got up, went about getting ready for work, and the phone beeped again, then again a few seconds later. Then as she buttered her toast, another message came through, and another. In exasperation, she picked up her phone.
Ella: ‘Can I see you tonight?’
Ella: ‘You’ll probably be going out with him, won’t you?’
Ella: ‘Come out with me instead.’
Ella: ‘You needed me until he came along.’
Charley read them one by one and then scrolled through them all again. She sighed. Ella must be feeling really low to send such messages. But, drunk or sober, there was hardly any need for the accusatory tone. Charley decided she might ask her about them when she next saw her, see if she couldn’t get to the bottom of things.
When another message came through as she was leaving, she thought for a moment about ignoring it. But luckily when she looked, this time it was from Aaron. She smiled as she read it, feeling herself blush at its bluntness. God, that man really had changed her life for the better already!
Upstairs, Ella was pacing the living room.
‘Answer me, you bitch. Answer me!’ She checked her mobile phone for the umpteenth time but no messages had been received. She threw it down onto the settee. Then she walked the room again, picked up the phone, and repeated the procedure.
Damn that woman – why wasn’t she good enough to be her friend? She should want to spend time with her too, surely? It wasn’t right that she would ignore her; she wouldn’t let her either.
She was about to check her phone again when she heard the entrance door open downstairs, close again moments afterwards. Racing to the window, she was in time to see Charley walk towards her car and sling her bag onto the back seat before getting in. She waited until the car was out of sight. Then she picked up her phone again and sent another text message.
‘Why won’t you reply?’
And then another. ‘What’s wrong?’
The final one: ‘Why are you ignoring me?’
It was two thirty on Tuesday afternoon. Drunk, Ella sat sobbing, knocking back more alcohol as she tried to blot out her non-existent life. She was losing control again, she could tell; knew this obsession with sex was tearing her apart. But wanting to kick the habit of sleeping around and doing it was another thing entirely. All she longed for every day was the release it brought. It was as if with every orgasm, every coupling, a piece of the bad inside her was released too, but it didn’t last long. Soon, she’d be feeling like shit again and the circle continued.
She wondered whether to seek help from her social worker, maybe go back to the group counselling sessions. She hadn’t seen Tanya Smith for a few months now, not since she’d shown her the notebook she’d written in. She’d been scared to go back in case Tanya was tempted to lock her up. Section her and put her into a mental institution; say she was losing her mind. Ella was certain that she wouldn’t find her anyway. She didn’t know she was living in Warwick Avenue. She’d go to the wrong address, if she was still after her.
She knocked back another mouthful of vodka straight from the bottle, wishing there was someone she could trust enough to tell her secret. Someone who would encourage her to get help and then guide her so she could get better – not the likes of Tanya or that stupid sex therapist she’d seen in the past. Someone who would be there for her all the time and not just when she had an appointment.
Someone close to her that she could call on to chat to when the urge to get used struck her.
Someone as close to her as Charley.
Yeah, as if that’s going to happen.
‘I KNOW!’ Ella screamed.
Charley had kept her distance since she’d caught her crying in the garden on Sunday evening. Since then, Ella had gone further and further into a spiral of chaos. All of the text messages she’d sent had gone unanswered and that riled her – along with Aaron invading the space that should have been hers.
There had been a bit of light entertainment between her periods of drunkenness. Ella had seen Sabrina again last night. It had been fun – she’d made her laugh as much as she’d made her come – but that was all it would ever be. The young woman seemed a little smitten with her. Sweet Sabrina would be good for her. But Ella didn’t want good: she wanted bad and nasty.
October was upon them, the nights creeping in, the recent Indian summer forgotten. The week was turning out to be a washout so far but although the sky was grey and rain splashed at the window, it was still warm enough for her to lie naked and uncovered on the settee, fingers idly stroking her skin as she fantasised about Charley. It would have been fun if she could have orchestrated it for real. But it wouldn’t happen now that she was keeping her distance.
Charley was pulling away – and all because of that bastard, Aaron. If he hadn’t come along when he did, she and Charley would be great friends by now. It was more his fault than hers. If Ella ever had the chance to harm him, she would hurt him as much as he had wounded her by taking Charley away.
Frenzied by alcohol and bad thoughts, she slipped downstairs. It took a few times before she could see clearly enough to put the key in the lock but finally she managed to get inside Charley’s flat. She headed for the living room, noticing different things along with familiar objects. There was a pile of paperwork on the desk this time, with several manila folders. She flicked one open, saw notes about someone called Margare
t Owen who’d been sexually assaulted by her partner. Ella wished she hadn’t drunk so much now or she would have read them all.
Trying to read, she brought the paper nearer to her face. The address looked familiar – Uttoxeter Road, Meir. Of course, she realised. It was where she had followed Charley to when she was out visiting, where Charley had touched the woman’s arm to comfort her.
Feeling drowsy, she dropped onto a settee and thought about what Charley and Aaron must have got up to in this room. Had he fucked her at the desk, or shagged her on the carpet in front of the fire? Had they screwed on this very sofa? It made her feel aroused again. She dropped the empty bottle to the floor, touching herself to orgasm, imagining them both with her.
Satisfied afterwards, she congratulated herself. This was fantastic – why hadn’t she thought of it before? She could come down here, see them in her mind everywhere in this flat, touch herself standing in the exact same spot and come over and over again. Not even have to leave the house. It was perfect and so fucking rude.
Her eyelids fluttered closed as she slipped back into her fantasy. Moments later she was asleep.
Jean couldn’t believe Ella was in Charley’s flat again. What was wrong with that woman? She had hoped it would be a phase of Ella’s, that once she’d got to know Charley she wouldn’t feel the need to snoop around. She knew there was nothing she could do about it but it made her sad. It was one thing to do as Jean did, stare out of the window all day every day, but it was another thing entirely to be in someone’s home when they didn’t know about it. She didn’t invade anyone’s privacy, go through their belongings, and search through personal possessions. Jean couldn’t imagine that Charley would be too excited about it if she did find out any time soon. It was deceitful.
She heard the door go downstairs.
‘It’s only me, Jean!’ Ruby shouted up to her. ‘Wait a couple of minutes and you’ll smell something nice that I’ve bought you.’
Jean smiled. On her last visit, Ruby had said she’d call in at the chip shop the next time she was due. Knowing she would keep her word, Jean had been looking forward to it all day. So too, she imagined, would Tom if he knew what leftovers he could expect. He was curled up on her lap; she stroked the top of his head.
‘Fish for tea, Tom,’ she told him. ‘Far more important than looking out of the window.’
She noted down Ruby’s arrival time and closed the notebook. That one completed, she took out another from the cabinet by her side, excited about starting a new first page all over again. With all Ella’s comings and goings lately, she’d used up the last notebook much quicker than usual.
Ruby placed the tray on her lap, her eyes scanning the room. ‘Where is it?’
‘I haven’t the faintest idea.’ Jean looked on in amusement.
Ruby pushed her hair behind her ear and pouted. ‘It’s called a Lifeline system for a reason.’ She spotted what she was looking for and went to retrieve it. Jean had a cordless telephone and a pendant which were attached to a twenty-four-hour call-out system, so if anything happened to her, help would be at hand. It allowed Jean to be independent. The emergency pendant hung by a cord over the corner of the headboard. But the phone was nowhere to be seen.
‘What’s the point of having this if you don’t wear it – or at least keep your phone nearby in case you fall?’
‘Consider me told off,’ Jean said, as she placed the pendant around her neck. She knew she’d remove it as soon as Ruby had gone; she didn’t want to be a burden to anyone.
‘Right, then,’ Ruby reached over and pinched a chip. ‘I’ll find your phone and whether you like it or not, at least I’ll feel better knowing that someone is looking out for you!’
By Wednesday lunchtime, her messages still unanswered, Ella drove into Hanley and hung around Stafford Street window shopping. Just after twelve thirty, she saw Charley come out of her offices and head into the centre of town. Ella stayed well hidden until she saw her go past and then set off, keeping a little way behind.
Two minutes later, Charley crossed over the road and headed into TK Maxx. Ella followed, walking briskly up the next aisle and then down to her as if she’d been in there all the time.
‘Hi, Charley,’ she beamed. ‘I’m on my lunch break. Fancy seeing you in here.’
‘Hi, Ella.’ Charley smiled. ‘I’m just after a couple of pictures to put up in the hallway. How are you?’
‘Fine, fine.’ Ella tried to keep her voice from squeaking excitedly. ‘So what’ve you been up to? Still getting on with the lovely Aaron?’
Charley nodded. ‘Yes, so far so good.’ She picked up a framed image and began to study it.
An awkward silence fell between them.
‘Do you fancy grabbing a coffee? We could head over to –’
‘Sorry.’ Charley stopped her. ‘I’ve been on my lunch break far too long now; I’m due back at the office in a couple of minutes. Another time, maybe?’
‘Sure.’ Ella stopped herself too, from slapping Charley across her face for lying. As she turned to look at the picture again, it took her a while to realise she was being dismissed.
‘Right, then. I’ll see you again soon, yeah?’
Charley nodded. ‘Sure, Ella. See you.’
‘When will you see me?’
‘Sorry?’
‘I could call for coffee later this evening? It’s been ages since we had a good chat. I know you’re seeing Aaron but it would do you good not to live in each other’s pockets. I mean, you’ve only been seeing him for nineteen days. It’s not like you’re marrying him or anything, is it?’
She paused for breath, long enough to acknowledge the astonishment on Charley’s face. She grinned. ‘Sorry, I’m being too forward again, aren’t I? It’s such a bad habit.’
Charley put down the picture and made a big gesture of checking her watch. ‘Blimey, I really have to go. Bye, Ella.’
‘Bye, Charley. See you soon.’
Ella watched Charley scurry off before heading into the city centre to get a drink. She needed a shot of something to calm herself, to erase the memory of Charley’s rejection. But inside The Reginald Mitchell pub, she found that she couldn’t walk towards the bar. Tears welled in her eyes as she ran into the toilets. Finding them empty, she locked herself in a cubicle and let her grief out.
Why didn’t Charley want to make time for her anymore? All Ella had done was be friendly and that friendship had been rejected since Aaron had come on to the scene. Nineteen days she’d had to suffer, watching them together. And she had a feeling it was going to get much worse.
Why couldn’t Charley see that she didn’t need Aaron? She sobbed, wiping her eyes with the back of her sleeve. She just needed Ella. Ella would be enough for her, good for her.
Why couldn’t she see that?
‘If you’re worried about Ella, you need to notify someone,’ Aaron said when Charley went over the incident with him later that evening. She was at his house, having followed him home in her car after work.
Charley sighed. ‘I’m not sure it’s my place to get involved. Maybe she’s lonely and latching on to me. I feel like I want to keep my distance but I don’t like being unfriendly. You know how I like to help people.’
‘Yes, but she’s clearly not acting rationally. It wouldn’t do any harm to check if she’s known to social services, either.’
Charley had already had that thought but misgivings had crept in. ‘She isn’t my client.’
‘I wouldn’t want her as one of my clients.’
Charley turned to him sharply but realised he was winding her up when she saw him grinning. Their jobs ensured they were both open-minded, non-judgemental; helping people was what they did.
Charley hadn’t told anyone about Ella’s erratic behaviour with the text messages on Monday morning, mainly hoping that they would stop. And t
hey had. But, ever since Ella had caught up with her, the messages had started again. Her phone had beeped constantly every ten minutes or so, to the point that Lynne had asked her to put it on silent as it was making her lose concentration.
‘Why don’t you fancy a coffee this evening?’
‘We could do another night instead?’
‘How about tomorrow?’
‘She knew exactly how long we’d been seeing each other,’ Charley decided to tell him. ‘Nineteen days – even I wouldn’t be that specific. I’d say nearly three weeks if anyone asked, not an exact number. Why is she keeping track of us?’
‘Bloody hell, Charl, that’s eerie,’ Aaron remarked.
‘I know.’ Charley sighed. ‘She’s obviously lonely. I’m going to look into what I can do for her.’
‘Well at least you don’t have to worry about it this evening.’ He pointed to her overnight bag. ‘I hope you remembered to bring your toothbrush, too?’
‘I sure did.’ Charley grinned cheekily, thankful that she was staying over with him. ‘There is one thing you won’t find in there, though.’
‘What’s that?’
‘My pyjamas.’
Ella woke up with a start when she heard a car door slam outside the window. She stretched and opened her eyes. She got up quickly, falling to the side and rolling onto the floor in her haste. Shit, she was in Charley’s flat! After retrieving the bottle, she let herself out quickly.
Back upstairs in her living room, she checked the time. It was quarter past seven. She looked out into the dark. Where was Charley? She had never stayed out during the week before. She’d always come home first if she was going out later, either changing from her work wear into more casual clothes or emerging ready for a workout at the gym. This was unlike her.
Ella’s mind went into overdrive. Had Charley been involved in an accident? Shit, she could be lying dead in a morgue for all she knew.
Or had she gone to see Aaron instead of coming home? If she had, things might be more serious than she’d imagined.
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