He cleared his throat and leaned forward. “I’m going to have to spell this out for you, aren’t I?”
I nodded. “That would be helpful.”
“You should talk to Madi. Things have changed for her recently, and I think it would be a good idea for you two to talk. Outside of a work environment.”
I nodded and let the words sink in. Something had changed? I wondered what it was long after he excused me and I walked back to the locker room.
“How was the meeting?” Hartman was standing next to Brassard and Howe already changed into their street clothes.
“Good. Coach said I’ve been cleared.”
They all congratulated me and a few of the other guys came up and slapped my back on their way out.
“That’s great. It’s been weird playing without you.” Hartman pulled his bag over his shoulder and waved as he left.
I gathered my stuff and soon followed. I had to figure out how I was going to get a chance to talk to Madeline without her avoiding me. Maybe Chloe would have an idea.
When I got home, I started making dinner. I may have had an ulterior motive. I was hoping if I surprised Chloe with dinner, she’s be more willing to talk to me about Madeline. Bribery was not beneath me.
She walked in as I was setting the table.
“Wow. Something smells good.”
I turned and gestured to the table. “Take a seat. Chicken marsala is coming right up.”
She shot me a suspicious look but sat down.
I brought two plates full of food out and sat one in front of her.
“Thanks, Erik.”
I smiled and waited for her to take a bite. It was one of her favorite meals, and I knew once she tasted it, she would be in a good mood.
She smiled at me. “This is great.” She took another bite, so I began eating. I let her enjoy the meal, waiting for my chance.
She finally met my eyes and smirked. “Can we pretend you did that out of the kindness of your heart?”
I threw up my hands. “Are you insinuating that I would do this for any other reason than to show you how much I love and appreciate my beautiful sister?”
She fake laughed. “Right.”
I shook my head and held a hand over my heart. “I’m offended, Chloe. I try to do something nice—”
“Cut the crap, Erik. What do you want?”
Fair enough. She knew me well enough to blow over the niceties. “I’ve just been wondering how Madeline is doing.”
Her eyebrow rose. “Why, pray tell, brother?”
I shook my head. She was going to make this as painful as possible. “She was more closed off during our sessions this week, and she cleared me without mentioning it to me first. It makes me think she’s avoiding me for some reason.”
“Wait? You’ve been cleared?”
I nodded hoping she’d move past that.
“Erik! That’s something we should celebrate.”
“We are.” I waved to the table. “See.”
She rolled her eyes. “You’re more concerned over why Madeline is ignoring you than you being able to play again?”
It sounded weird when she said it that way, but I was already past being cleared. I wasn’t over Madeline. “Yes.”
“Wow.”
“What?”
“I never thought I would see the day when Erik Schultz lost it over a woman.”
“What are you talking about?”
She shook her head. “You’ve enjoyed the benefits of being a professional athlete since you were drafted.”
“Yeah?”
“I mean the benefits of the women.”
“So?”
“So, you’ve never been with the same woman for longer than a week.”
“None of them kept my interest.”
“And Madeline does?”
I was getting annoyed now. “Of course. That’s why I’m asking about her.”
“I’m just trying to figure you out. I’ve never seen you care about one woman before, and I like Madi. I don’t want to see her get caught up in your whims.”
I was shocked. “You think I’d hurt her?”
“Maybe.” She sighed. “Erik, I love you. You know that. But your past isn’t exactly what most girls are looking for.”
“I dated around because I’ve never met a woman I was interested in enough to spend more time with.”
“You’re the team playboy.”
“I didn’t come up with that.”
She shook her head. “I know. The PR department may have influenced that, but you gave them plenty of material to run with. You’ve been with models, actresses, socialites.”
“I’m aware of my dating life, Chloe.”
“Yeah, so is everyone else.”
I shook my head. I couldn’t believe that she, of all people, was judging me. She was the one person in the world that really knew me. If she didn’t believe in me, no one would.
“Madeline’s different. I’ve gotten to know her and I really like her.”
“Then you’re going to have to prove it. It’s not going to be easy, Erik.”
“That’s fine. She’s worth the fight.”
Chloe finally smiled. “I’m glad to hear that.”
It killed me that she saw me that way. She didn’t believe me. Sure, I’d been stupid in the past and got caught up in the fame that comes with being in the league, but that didn’t mean I was a bad guy. I was upfront with those girls. They knew I wasn’t interested in anything more than one night, one event. It was for appearances’ sake.
I needed to change that. I needed to prove I wasn’t that guy.
Chapter Seventeen
Madeline
I was adjusting to my new routine better than I thought I would. Living with my parents wasn’t as bad as I’d imagined, and it was nice having someone at home with me. Dad was busy with the team, of course, but Mom and I were enjoying girl time. We’d started taking an evening spin class and she was working on getting me to come to her yoga class.
I could tell she loved having me around. As an only child, I’d had her full attention growing up. Dad told me it was hard on her when I moved to Chicago for school. She was left home alone while Dad traveled with the team. This was working out for everyone, and I wasn’t eating dinner alone anymore.
I wasn’t worrying about he-who-shall-not-be-named and when he would finally come home. I wasn’t wondering where he was or who he was with.
It was wonderful. Freeing. Exactly what I needed.
Now that Erik’s therapy sessions were over, I was at the office more and getting used to my coworkers.
My contentment made me realize something. I was enough on my own. I’d created the stability and predictability I’d craved my whole life on my own. I always thought I needed a man to do that.
Nope. I was wrong. I was just fine solo.
“Have a good night.” I waved to the receptionist, Trish, and walked out to my car. Mom mentioned she was making pizzas tonight and I was looking forward to getting home and helping.
“Madeline.”
I turned to the sound of my name and almost tripped over the curb when I saw Erik walking up to me.
“What are you doing here?” He couldn’t be hurt again. Right?
“I want to talk to you.”
“So, you thought waiting outside of my place of work was a good idea?” If I didn’t know him I would have found it creepy. I mean, it still was, but at least I knew he wasn’t a crazy person. “It’s a bit stalkerish.”
He looked at the ground. “I know. I’m sorry. I just didn’t know how to get you to talk to me, and I don’t know where your house is.”
Huh. He didn’t know I moved in with my parents? I figured word would have already spread by now. Chloe knew. I wondered why she didn’t mention it to him.
“What did you want to talk to me about? I cleared you for play.”
He stepped closer. “Can I take you to dinner?”
It was tempting, but I
knew how disappointed my mom would be. “I have plans.”
“Right, of course.”
Was he nervous? I didn’t think that was possible for him.
“Well, I just…um…I know you have a boyfriend, so I’m probably crossing a line—”
“I don’t.” I didn’t mean to interrupt him, but I didn’t want him or anyone else still thinking that.
“Really?” He was surprised. I guess Chloe hadn’t told him.
“Yeah, really.”
He didn’t speak for a few moments. It was almost uncomfortable. “I know we haven’t known each other for very long, but I really like…um...talking to you.”
He cringed, and I almost laughed. Erik Schultz—the hockey god, the playboy—was nervous?
“I like talking to you too.”
“Really?” He smiled and ran his hands through his hair. “Do you want to maybe go out sometime.”
Wait. That’s why he was here? He was asking me out? It didn’t make sense.
“Erik—”
“I know you’re just getting out of a relationship, so you probably need some time. That’s fine though. I can wait.”
I felt so bad. I wanted him to stop. I wanted to explain to him what happened. How Clark had been cheating. How my reality had been shattered. I was just barely getting comfortable being by myself. I needed to learn to be by myself. It wouldn’t be fair to me or him if I jumped into something else.
“I do need some time.”
His demeanor changed. He seemed to deflate. I doubted he would care. He’d find another supermodel or something to go out with.
The Pride had filled me in on his reputation. I’d heard about it in Chicago, but they knew the real details. He was a player. A womanizer. He went through women like most people went through rolls of toilet paper. He was the complete opposite of me and what I wanted.
I had to admit, the description didn’t match up with what I’d seen from him. I wasn’t willing to risk it though. I couldn’t trust my instincts right now.
“Okay.” He nodded once and took a step back. “I understand.”
He turned and walked away before I could say goodbye. That was the last thing I expected tonight. I knew I’d hurt him. Maybe hurt was the wrong word. He was disappointed. I had to put myself first right now. I forgot how to do that and it resulted in the situation I was in with the fallout from The Betrayer.
I’d talk to him later. Let him know what I was going through. Help him understand why seeing me wouldn’t be a good idea. I wasn’t what he wanted. I was the opposite of a one-night stand.
I got in my car and drove home, replaying the bizarre conversation in my mind.
Mom was already at work in the kitchen when I walked in.
“Hey, honey. Grab an apron and start rolling.”
I picked a red apron from the hook near the pantry and pulled it on. She slid a ball of dough toward me and I got to work.
“How was your day?” She was chopping peppers but stopped and looked over at me.
“It was interesting.”
“Oh? Something exciting happen? Did you get a new client? Is he famous? A rockstar?”
I burst out laughing. “Why would a rockstar come to a center in Salt Lake?”
She shook her head. “There’s plenty of celebrities that live here and Park City.”
That was true, but it was still far-fetched. “Nothing like that. Sorry to let you down.”
She smiled and began rolling out another ball of dough. “Then what happened?”
I blew out a breath. Did I want to tell her about Erik? Of course, I did, but I wasn’t sure if I wanted to hear what her thoughts were. “Promise to just listen?”
She narrowed her eyes but nodded.
I looked down at the dough and pounded it. “Erik Schultz was waiting for me when I left.”
I peeked out of the corner of my eye and saw her biting her lip. It was killing her not to say anything, but she kept her promise.
“He wanted to go out tonight, but I told him I had plans.” She nodded but remained silent. “So, he asked me out for another time. I told him I was single, and he seemed to understand I need some time. He told me he would wait until I was ready.”
I looked up and laughed. Mom’s eyes were so wide. I could tell she was dying to say something, but I wasn’t done.
“I’m not sure it’s a good idea, though. You know what people say about him. He’s a player. He’s way out of my league and I don’t even understand why he would be interested in me. It’s almost like a joke. Maybe he sees me as a challenge because of Dad?”
I knew I was rambling, but I had to get everything off my chest.
“I don’t want to get hurt again, and he would definitely hurt me. I’m not his type. I do relationships, and he’s allergic to that word.”
I sighed and looked at her. She raised her eyebrows and I nodded. “I’m done.”
“That’s quite a lot to take in.”
I couldn’t agree more. I was still reeling.
“I don’t think you should judge Erik before really getting to know him. His reputation is something to consider, but you shouldn’t define him by it.”
She was right. I’d hate if someone did that to me.
“I’ve known Erik since he joined the team at nineteen. I know he’d been through a lot. He’s a good guy. I wouldn’t say that if it wasn’t true. I love all of the guys on the team, but there are only a few I would be okay with you dating. Erik is one of them.”
That surprised me. I thought she would be warning me to run away.
“I can’t even think of that right now. I just got out of a crappy relationship. I don’t want to get involved in anything else before I take the time to figure out who I am.”
Mom nodded slowly while forming the dough into a perfect circle. I looked down at my attempt. It was more of a rectangle at this point. I gave up and watched her, waiting to hear what she thought.
She finally sighed and wiped her hands on her apron. “Madi, I can’t tell you what to do. You know yourself and your needs better than anyone.”
“But?” I could sense that wasn’t the end of it.
“I think you’re using the breakup as an excuse. Something to hide behind.”
How could she think that? It was a mere week since I ended a four-year relationship. That wasn’t very long. It wasn’t like it had been a year or more and I was still living here and not dating. Even if that was the case, that should be fine. There’s no right or wrong amount of time to wait before dating again.
“Mom—”
“Don’t take that the wrong way. If you really need some time, I’ll support you. But I think you know who you are. I think you know what you want out of life and what you want out of a relationship, otherwise you wouldn’t have ended things with Clark.”
I narrowed my eyes at his name, but she didn’t notice.
“I understand being scared of getting hurt again, but don’t let fear dictate your life.”
I didn’t think I was. I bit my lip and looked down at my deformed attempt compared to her perfection. Maybe that’s what was wrong with me. I wanted perfection. I wanted everything to go according to my plan. Look where that had gotten me.
“Maybe you’re right.”
“Maybe?” She raised an eyebrow and laughed with me.
“Okay, you’re right about part of it. I do know what I want in life and in a relationship. But Erik isn’t it.”
“Because he’s in the league?”
I shrugged. I didn’t want to criticize her choices. She’d married my dad knowing he was destined for this same life.
“Honey, I know you didn’t always love moving around while you were growing up.”
Understatement. I hated having to start over every year or so.
“But Erik isn’t your dad. He’s better.”
I gasped and stared at her.
She laughed. “If you ever tell Dad I said that I’ll deny it, but it’s true. Dad never found
his place like Erik has. The league is different now too. As long as Erik performs the way he has been there’s little chance he’ll move.”
“His contract is up this season.”
She nodded. “And I doubt the team will risk losing him.”
I watched her. Did she know something?
“Stop looking at me like that. You know Dad wouldn’t tell me anything.”
She was right. Being the family of the coach had plenty of perks, but finding out news before anyone else was not one of them.
“There’s more than just moving. He’s a professional athlete. There’s fame that goes along with that.”
She nodded. “That’s true, and some guys get caught up in it. But not all of them. The Fury has been good about keeping the boys in check.” She turned to face me and folded her arms over her chest. “It seems like you’ve found all the cons in the situation, but what are some of the pros? You wouldn’t be considering this if you didn’t like things about him.”
Once again, she was right. I was focusing on the negative things.
She held up her hand. “I don’t want you to answer me right now. I want you to think about that. Weigh things and decide for yourself whether or not giving him a shot could be worth it.”
I appreciated being let off the hook, especially since the first few things I could think of had to do with his looks. Probably not what she meant.
“Thanks, Mom.”
She smiled. “You’re welcome. Now back away from the dough. I’m not sure what you were trying to make, but it’s not a crust.”
I stepped back and watched as she undid the damage I’d caused and rolled out another perfect circle.
“Show off.”
She laughed. “Practice.”
Chapter Eighteen
Erik
Rejection wasn’t something I was used to.
In fact, I couldn’t remember ever having to deal with it.
What did that say about me? Probably that life had been too easy, but that wasn’t true. I’d been through more than most people. I’ve just gone after things with enough dedication to yield the results I want. Plus, I’d never met a woman that wasn’t interested in me.
Match Penalty (Utah Fury Hockey Book 2) Page 11
