‘They were all there,’ she said to the assembled SPI:KEs and Spylets. ‘Eleven hippos, just lying around in the Everglades.’
‘I know how they felt,’ said G-Mamma, her eye make-up smudged after her afternoon-long nap.
‘You have to fight the heat,’ said Janey. ‘You have to keep going.’
‘You’re right, Janey,’ said Mrs Halliday. ‘But right now it’s night-time and we’re all a bit more alert. What’s our plan?’
Tish stuck up her hand. ‘How about Satispying back to the Everglades, rounding up those hippos and sending them back to Solfari Lands?’
Leaf apparently agreed. ‘I volunteer to go back to the Everglades tonight.’
‘I’ll come with you.’ Janey pulled a Girl-gauntlet from a cupboard. She wasn’t going without full protection this time.
‘Me too,’ said G-Mamma. ‘And Tish, seeing as it was her idea.’
It was agreed that they would be the hippo party, while Alfie and Mrs Halliday would watch out for Jean Brown, alert Abe Rownigan and operate the Satispy remote control. Seconds later, the three Spylets zapped down in the swamp, a traffic light of red, gold and green SPIsuits, followed by G-Mamma in shimmering grey. When she shoved a SPIder in her mouth and lowered herself under the water, she looked rather like a hippo herself. ‘Come on . . . bloop burple,’ she called as her mouth filled with water, waggling her eyebrows to encourage the others to follow.
They submerged themselves, Ultra-gogs on both night and water vision, gloves at the ready to fight off any passing alligators or persuade any hippos who were less than keen to go back to the zoo.
After a few minutes of groping around in the murky river the Spylets and SPI:KE popped up above the surface. ‘Nothing,’ said Janey. ‘But they were all here. Honestly.’
Leaf nodded. ‘We saw them too. How about I get that swamp buggy and we check a bit further . . .’
‘Forget it, Leafo,’ snapped G-Mamma. ‘It’s my turn with the boys’ toys. Blonde, you come with me. Titian and Leaf, you make for those cypress trees. Any trouble, SPIV me.’
Leaf merely raised an eyebrow, popped his SPIder back in his mouth and followed Tish, who was already cutting through the water in a steady and rather impressive front crawl. Janey and her SPI:KE climbed aboard the swamp buggy and blasted off in the other direction, slewing to a halt at intervals so Janey could bob into the water and have a look beneath the surface. Every so often they caught sight of an alligator’s tail or a pair of glowing amber eyes, but it became very evident, after several miles had been covered, that the hippos were no longer there.
‘Mud, mud, glorious mud,’ sang G-Mamma quietly. ‘Nothing quite like it for disguising missing hippos . . . So follow me, follow, down to the hollow, and there let us wallow, because there’s absolutely noooooooothing else there . . .’
Janey shrugged her shoulders where the rising sun was beginning to warm them. ‘This is hopeless. They’ve been moved. Copernicus must have found out we were on to them.’
At that moment the SPIV around her neck buzzed into life. Leaf’s face appeared, smothering a yawn. ‘There is nothing here. We are back at the picnic place, and we have seen a couple of alligators, but that is all.’ He panned the SPIV around the picnic site to demonstrate. It was completely quiet, apart from the gentle sound of Tish snoring, curled up on a picnic bench. ‘We are both very exhausted,’ Leaf explained. ‘All that swimming . . .’
G-Mamma’s head was also starting to loll so Janey grabbed the rudder and turned them around. ‘We’ll head back to the site,’ she told Leaf. ‘We might as well go home.’
They Satispied back to the familiar welcome of the Villa del Sol. Mrs Halliday and Alfie passed the details on to Solfari Lands after a brief decode and debrief session. Janey stood under the spy shower, letting the incredible droplets melt away a hard night’s spy work. Leaf, Tish and G-Mamma, meanwhile, had simply collapsed on the sunbeds outside their villa and fallen asleep.
An hour later Jean Brown got up from the breakfast table and angled a parasol over G-Mamma’s face. ‘She’s starting to look like a pumpkin.’
‘Ugh,’ snorted Alfie. ‘Imagine that all carved out with a candle in it. Very Halloween.’
‘That’s enough.’ Mrs Halliday pushed her croissant to one side. ‘In fact, I think a little dozing in the sun looks like a very good idea. We’ll just hang around here today, I think.’
To Janey’s surprise, Alfie didn’t argue but simply nodded and yawned. At least now I can get to Disney World with Mum, thought Janey. Even Spylets need a day off.
Jean Brown was delighted with the suggestion. ‘Yes! Great idea, Janey.’
Janey, now in shorts and a strappy T-shirt, was soon jumping into the back of the car, and as the ever-obliging Ronnie drove them up to the turnstiles of the Magic Kingdom, her mum jiggled up and down on her seat. ‘I’m so excited!’ she said, beaming.
Janey smiled. If only Jean knew how exciting her own spy life used to be.
The theme park was tremendous fun. They queued for thrilling rides, waved at various characters and watched scenes from films re-enacted before their very eyes. By lunchtime Janey was exhausted, and even Jean’s enthusiasm seemed to have dwindled. She sank on to a stone toadstool, fanning herself with the guidebook.
‘Gosh, it’s hot. I might have to go back to the villa for a swim,’ she said, sweat trickling from the brow-band of her hat.
Janey had to agree. All her clothes were sticking to her in a way that her golden SPIsuit never did, and a crushing headache gripped her brain so that planning the next event seemed too difficult a task. She peered at the guide. ‘The parade’s at three. Why don’t we sit in the shade until then?’
Her mum agreed, and together they staggered to a refreshment site. Many other people had had the same idea, and the queues for drinks and ice creams were bigger than some of the queues for the rides. A nice family from Germany took pity on the Browns and allowed them to perch on the end of their shaded table, and Jean revived enough to get food and water for them both.
Janey smiled at the family – mum, dad and two boys about seven years old – as her mum headed towards the counter, banging into tables as she went. ‘Hot,’ she said, fanning her face.
‘Ja!’ said the mother, pointing to her children. One of the boys was crying listlessly into his fries, and the other was slumped against his father, who had his head propped in his hands as he slurped his supersize cola.
Looking around, Janey could see that everyone was feeling the same way. A family a few tables away was bickering over a water bottle, and a small tussle broke out between the mother and her teenage daughter. Elsewhere people were quiet, sticking out their lower lips to blow cooling air over their sticky faces, or fanning themselves with whatever they could get their hands on.
Finally, Jean Brown came back with their lunch. ‘That was hard work,’ she said breathlessly. ‘One of the staff had passed out behind the counter, and the others were just stepping over him, they were so busy.’
‘This is mad, Mum,’ said Janey, stifling an enormous yawn. ‘Why don’t we just forget the parade?’
‘I want to see Mickey Mouse,’ said her mother firmly. ‘And Pooh Bear.’
‘OK,’ said Janey with a grin. Deep down she really wanted to see them too. And by the time they had finished their salads and bottles of water, and had had a little snooze in their seats, it was almost three o’clock anyway . . .
They lined up with what felt like the rest of America, with hundreds of fractious children and equally ratty adults. There was a lacklustre cheer as the parade began, and Jean Brown turned a yawn into a grin. ‘The Little Mermaid!’ she cried, nudging Janey. ‘She used to be your favourite. And Cinderella. And . . . what’s that one called?’ She stopped, puzzled.
‘Snow White,’ said Janey.
Jean shook herself. ‘Snow White! How could I forget that? It’s so hot out here I can hardly think.’
She wasn’t the only one, it seemed. Janey peere
d more closely as the elaborately decorated float with the Little Mermaid on it passed by. The mermaid was asleep, statue-like, with her hand in a wave and her head tipped to one side. The other characters were just managing to shuffle along, nodding to the crowd, or perhaps nodding with fatigue, and then Janey spotted her mum’s favourite further along the parade.
‘Look, Mum,’ she said. ‘It’s Tigger!’
They both turned in delight, but their expressions turned to horrified bafflement as the famous tiger raised his right paw, tottered for a moment as if he’d lifted something heavy over his head, then careered with little stumbling steps straight into the crowd.
‘Get his costume off,’ shouted one of the more alert onlookers, a man in a bright yellow shirt.
‘No! You’ll spoil the magic for the children.’ His wife gave his arm a slap.
‘But he’ll suffocate!’ The man wrestled with Tigger’s head. ‘I think that might ruin the magic too.’
And when Tigger’s head came off to reveal a red-faced teenage girl, yelling, ‘No, Mom. I don’t want to get up yet!’ Janey turned to her mother.
‘Mum, I’m really tired. Shall we go now?’
To her relief, her mum nodded. ‘I need a dip.’
Ronnie whacked the air-conditioning on full and cruised along to the villas where they’d planned on getting the others together. It was not as easy as they’d thought. Every one of Janey’s spy team was flat out and snoring by the pool. They hadn’t moved since that morning. Janey shook Mrs Halliday.
‘Mrs H,’ she said. ‘we’re going for a swim in the sea. Do you want to come?’
Mrs Halliday sat up blearily. ‘Sharks!’ she shouted, then lay down again.
Janey tried Alfie instead. ‘Come on, Al. You can try the surf. Let’s go.’
‘Five minutes,’ he groaned, holding up three fingers.
Only Leaf responded quickly. ‘What is the problem?’ He sat up with a start and Janey explained that they were off for a swim in the ocean. ‘Ah yes. That is a good idea. I will help you wake the others.’ And with that he ran up to the small diving board and launched himself into the pool.
‘Whazzat?’ G-Mamma sat bolt upright, one of her false eyelashes stuck to her cheek. She patted her damp legs. ‘Whysitallwet? Whatsssgoingon? Stopitlittlegreenboy.’
Leaf grinned and dive-bombed the pool again. Within moments the resulting splash had roused everybody. ‘Come on, you lot,’ pleaded Janey. ‘A swim will wake you up.’
Alfie groaned, but he still gathered up his surfboard and headed for the car.
The others followed reluctantly after taking quick Wowers to get into their SPIsuit surf gear. Ronnie held the boot open casually, so that Trouble could jump in, and soon they were speeding along towards the coast, the air-conditioning raising their spirits as it lowered their temperatures.
The beach looked stunning in the glorious sunlight, as though a sunbeam had been captured and stretched along the coast. Janey pulled her PERSPIRE down over her eyes. All around them, the sand was littered with sleeping bodies in varying shades of sunburn; the spies and Mrs Brown piled their clothes under a sun umbrella and plunged into the sea.
‘Do those sunbathers know something we don’t?’ Jean looked around as they ploughed through the waves. They were the only ones in the water.
Janey glanced back towards the beach but said nothing. The cool water was such bliss that she wasn’t about to mention to Jean that the waves might be home to a rare mutant Colossal Squid. Back on the sand there was only one upright figure – a little boy, watching them solemnly with his arms wrapped around his knees. Behind him, Ronnie leaned on the car, fanning himself and occasionally scratching Trouble’s head. ‘I think they’re all just asleep. Come on, we’ll be fine.’
For half an hour they splashed and played in the surf, the adults bobbing in cool bliss, the Spylets body-surfing and dunking each other, gradually getting deeper and deeper and allowing the cool water to wake them up thoroughly.
This is fun, thought Janey. Just like a real, normal holiday, doing real things with normal people – well, normalish people. And she allowed herself to cast off the burden of Spylet and concentrate on being a girl: a girl playing with her friends in the churning, foaming sea, having a great holiday.
But the sea was splashing and churning for a particular reason. They were not alone.
supersize snacks
Jean Brown was floating on her back, eyes closed and completely relaxed, when a jet of water shot up out of the ocean a few metres behind her. Janey caught sight of the little fountain, and then she saw another. And another. All around them, getting ever closer, was a circle of water jets.
Janey’s heart thudded as she caught sight of something else glistening, moving fast just under the surface of the water.
‘Er, Mum . . .’ she called quietly. ‘Everyone, I think you should head towards me. Slowly. Don’t splash.’
Jean Brown’s instant response was to thrash over on to her front and kick towards Janey. ‘What? What is it?’
Janey’s heart sank. Only a short distance behind her mum, the water parted for a second and a slick sliver of whale-skin bobbed into view, then disappeared. The whale was closer than it had been before.
The others, responding to the warning tone in Janey’s voice, had fallen silent. G-Mamma pulled on her goggles – Ultra-gogs, thought Janey – and did a neat and splashless tuck-and-dive beneath the surface. She popped up again a moment later, much closer to Janey.
‘Fishy fiascos!’ she squeaked. ‘Killer whales!’
‘No one thrash!’ hissed Janey. ‘Keep calm.’
The spout of water behind Mrs Brown was now so close that it actually looked to Janey as though it was coming out of the top of her mum’s head. The whale could be just about to open its deadly jaws and snap her up. Hardly thinking what she was doing, and ignoring her own advice, Janey hauled herself out of the water to crouch on her ASPIC. Just as she cruised to her mother’s side, the terrifying mouth reared out of the water, open, ready to strike.
‘Janeeeeyy!’ screeched Jean Brown.
In one movement, Janey bent down to scoop her mother up on to the front of her ASPIC and extended one leg behind her. The killer whale’s teeth grazed the bare skin below her golden SPIsuit as she lifted her foot and banged hard against the whale’s tongue. Her Four-Fs exploded and she and her mother shot off across the ocean, her mum straddling the board and hanging on wildly with both arms and Janey balanced on one leg like a crazed ballerina. The whale snapped its jaws together and dived under the water with a low trumpeting sound.
Janey’s ASPIC collided with Alfie. He and Leaf were back-to-back on their boards, Alfie covering for Leaf as he punched questions into his PERSPIRE as quickly as his wet, slippery fingers would allow. ‘Come on,’ muttered Alfie. ‘We’re completely surrounded. Find out what we can do!’
‘I am trying. This is madness. This should not be happening,’ said Leaf, glancing up anxiously as a nearby waterspout showered his board with droplets of ocean.
Meanwhile Tish, G-Mamma and Mrs Halliday were all lined up on Tish’s board, standing in a row and not daring to put a toe into the water as the circling waterspouts got nearer and nearer, and ominous flashes of whale-skin broke the surface.
‘How many are there?’ Janey pulled her mum to her feet and got her balanced on the board. ‘Two? Three?’
Alfie turned to her, his face grim. ‘Eleven. There are eleven of them. And six of us.’
‘Supersize snacks!’ yelled G-Mamma. ‘That’s what we’ll be! Titian Ambition, don’t you dare move!’ Tish clearly had no intention of moving and was trying to hold the board still.
Janey put her arms around her mum’s waist. For the rest of them it was terrifying, but for Jean Brown this situation was plain madness. All she knew was that a pack of killer whales had surrounded a random group of swimmers and was about to eat them up. She squeezed Janey hard and dropped a kiss on her forehead. ‘I haven’t protected you. That
’s my job, as your mother, and I’ve failed you.’
‘No, you haven’t,’ said Janey fiercely. ‘You’re brilliant. You don’t know how brilliant . . .’
‘That’s why everyone stayed on the beach,’ said Jean quietly. ‘I’m so sorry, Janey.’
Janey shook her head, gasping as water spouted up from the ocean just metres away. She glanced at the sleeping figures on the beach – and her breath caught in her throat. The eleven waterspouts were grouped in a neat circle all around them, but she wasn’t looking at them. Instead her eyes fixed on one of the only figures on the beach that wasn’t asleep.
Trouble.
He was lying on a towel near the beach bags, his eyes glowing hypnotically as he watched every move. Suddenly he stood up, the bristles at the back of his neck standing on end.
Right at that moment, all the jets of water died away. Janey sensed that the killer whales were waiting for something: a signal to attack. ‘Trouble!’ she screamed. ‘Come here, Twubs! Everyone, get closer to me and Mum.’
The spy team leaped into action, paddling, ASPICing, dragging their way across the choppy water towards Janey, just as eleven sets of teeth rose out of the ocean. The whales were ready to strike the moment they were instructed to do so.
Janey looked around. And there it was – a hideous tentacle rising momentarily out of the water and slapping the surface like a conductor striking the podium with his baton. Copernicus.
She looked left. The water around them was bubbling, alive with the motion of eleven enormous bodies – twelve, now she knew the hideous Squid Man was there too.
But help was on the way.
Trouble was sleek and glorious, his golden tail streaming out behind him and his quiff flattened by the wind as he scooted across the ocean on what looked like his own tiny surfboard. Then, with an enormous yowl of satisfaction, Trouble launched himself off his board and sank his claws into one of the enormous whales. He raced up the slope of its back, jumping neatly over the spout hole and springing in a graceful somersault right off the tip of its nose . . .
Golden Spy Page 6
