I put my face in my hands as I swayed on my feet. Adam reached out to steady me. At first, I shook him off but then I had no choice but to allow him to hold me upright.
“Just take me to them.” I ordered weakly and immediately, he turned me to face the door.
“Can you walk?” His voice was gentle as his arm wrapped around my shoulder. I nodded; even if I could not, there was no way I was allowing him to carry me.
He let me take a few cautious steps before he tightened his grip to ensure that if my knees were to crumple out from beneath me that I would not hit the floor. With every step, my mind cleared just a little bit more.
“Now, please do not be alarmed by his appearance. He is going to be alright, I promise you.” Adam was still speaking gently, as though he was soothing a screaming child. I glared at him as he opened the door.
James was sitting, handcuffed to his chair, facing the doorway. His head was rolling from one side to the other as his eyes did the same in their sockets.
“Oh, my…” I managed to gasp out as I rushed forward and knelt in front of him. “James?” My hands were on his face, “James! Honey, wake up.” I shook him carefully, noting that his face was bruised severely and there was blood dribbling from one side of his mouth. The next time I spoke, I was not shocked to hear my voice break. “James, please wake up, baby!”
I pressed my forehead to his, fighting the tears that so desperately wanted to fall. Perhaps I would feel stronger if I just allowed a few to leak out.
No. I needed to remain defiant. I could beg for James to come back to me through frenzied, quickened, suffocating breaths but I would not shed a tear.
“Did… they… hurt you?” His voice was so weak and low, I believed I had imagined it. I leaned in when he repeated himself.
“No. I am alright. Look at you, honey…” The crackling in my voice made him open his eyes.
“I’ll be fine.” He was trying to raise his voice above a whisper for my sake. “Have they said anything?”
“Too much has been said. It would take too long to repeat it all. What matters is that they do not intend to kill us, which is a plus, surely.”
“Indeed, it is.” He nodded and looked into my eyes. I put both of my hands on his face again before kissing him for a long, tender moment. “Don’t worry about me, baby. I'm tough; I can handle it.”
“I am worried about you. Beating you up was unnecessary.”
“I was ready to kill every one of them to get to you. It was necessary, or else they’d all be dead.”
“I know,” I pressed my forehead to his again, “They have Violet, Penny and Elijah. They have Quinn, Alice and Nick, too, but I could not care less about that.”
“We need to stick together now. We need to start caring about them. They’re just kids, baby. We need to start watching over them a little more.”
“I sincerely doubt that any of them desire our protection. They are much too proud, which is admirable. It is also very convenient for our sake.”
“I’m being serious.” He told me as I wrapped my arms around his neck and rested my head against his chest. I was comforted by the sound of his heart beating steadily. He was truly in no danger of succumbing to his injuries. “I already feel a little better, sweetheart. I felt better the moment I saw you.”
I squeezed him a little harder and closed my eyes, wishing that I could fall asleep there with my body against his, listening to the sweet serenade of his heartbeat all the while.
“That is a very sweet thing to say, though I am sure that you are exaggerating slightly.”
“I'm not, actually. Your ability to downplay yourself never ceases to amaze me.”
I changed the subject quickly.
“Don asked about us.”
“Did he now? I am shocked that he would so nosily pry into our business.”
I ignored his sarcasm.
“He is puzzled by our relationship. He does not understand what a young woman like myself would be doing with someone your age. He asked if I love you. It was quite random and aggresively forward of him to ask such a thing. It is no business of his.”
“What did you say?” James asked, and I pulled away to look up at him.
“Your curiosity is driven by your own need to know my feelings.” I accused him softly, “This is not the time or the place to discuss such things, James.”
“You’ll have to forgive me for wanting to know.”
“You are the only man I have ever met who actually cares what I am feeling.”
“Is that such a bad thing?”
“No. It is just interesting. Confusing, also, and you know how befuddlement does not suit me at all. When the time is right, I will tell you where I stand on the matter. Just know that I am very fond of you.” Looking into his bruised face that was still so handsome despite his injuries, I was urged to say more. I allowed myself to indulge my heart’s desire to express my feelings, even if just for a moment. “I adore you. I depend on you more than I have ever allowed myself to depend on anyone and that is comforting, James. It is comforting to know that someone else is willing to care for me. I have done that myself for so long without complaint. That is why I say that you spoil me.”
“That’s not spoiling, Brynn. That's what is supposed to happen. It’s normal. It’s right.”
“Perhaps so. But it is as alien to me as the planet we are walking on and the situation we currently find ourselves in.”
“Our situation?”
“I was referring to both our relationship and the current conundrum with Adam and Don. They want us to stay here. I do not know why I feel such a reluctance to do so. They are offering us shelter, protection, food…” I looked at him, “It will be good for Penny and Violet to be around other people. It will be good for us, too.”
“To be around other people?”
“Yes, because we will be protected. I read his mind. He will allow you and I to live together. There will be no judgment, no chiding about our relationship. Of course, I do not care about that.”
“Nor do I, baby.” He closed his eyes after I embraced him warmly again. He burrowed his face in my hair and kissed my head. “You smell so good.”
“So do you.” I smiled brightly, “Do not ask me how that is possible considering that we have been living a life free of soap and shampoo. We have been bathing in streams, for the sake of all deities and Gods.”
He chuckled softly.
“What?”
“I love that one. That’s one of your more famous Brynna-isms.”
“Brynna-isms?” I repeated through a giggle.
“That’s what I’ve been calling them mentally.”
“I like it.”
“Do you?”
“Yes.” I laughed as he moved forward with difficulty to kiss me. I closed my eyes and returned his kiss, feeling my heart fluttering madly in the way that I had become accustomed to experiencing. I had never understood how so many great writers could toil endlessly over love and all its counterparts. Hate I understood. Loathing was a motivator, driven by its God, Anger. But love seemed so trivial, so meaningless. I agreed with Maura who said that it was a “bloody waste of time.” Now, I understood what all the fuss was about. I could write endless pages on my feelings for James, which I would not acknowledge openly as charging dangerously close to the border of love. I shuddered to think what I would feel when I hopped over that invisible, mental divide.
I pulled away when a bitter, gnawing cold filled up my insides. Maura’s others words, so unwelcome, were echoing through every dark room and corridor of my mind, which only a second earlier had been blissfully empty as James kissed me.
“They will trick you with their wiles, my dear. They want to make you weak. They prey on women to make themselves feel like men. It is all a play for power and control, for total dominance.”
“Tell me,” James whispered gently, “Tell me what you’re thinking.”
I shook my head, begging the warmth to return. It had b
een so serene, so divinely perfect. I should have known it would not last. My wise wariness of men was beginning to rear its hideously deformed head as my feelings for James grew.
“You have all the power over it, sweetheart,” James's eyes met mine, “You make the final decision.”
“I know. James, if you knew the full details of everything, you would not be so surprised.”
“I’m not surprised. I’m not upset. I understand, Brynna.”
“I know.” I nodded, feeling tears welling up in my eyes again. I wanted to love him. I wanted the defenses I had built so tediously for many years to crumple into nonexistence. I wanted James. I needed him. And he was right, I knew. Only I could decide whether or not I would advance our relationship. Only I could decide when to shut those cynically protective voices down for good. Those beliefs that had a mind of their own were actually mine and I could eradicate them if I found the power to do so.
“I should not be asking for your patience anymore.”
“Stop.” He kissed me again. I moved closer to him and kissed him back, “We have all the time in the world, baby.”
All the time in the world... That reminded me. I pulled away so I could look into his eyes. In my own, he saw that tremendous and dreadful fear that I could not sufficiently explain.
“What? What is it?” He asked as he tried to reach forward to grasp my face. Then, he remembered that his hands were still cuffed behind the chair he was sitting in.
“He told me we are immortal.” I answered softly, “And we have stopped aging.”
“That’s…” He laughed softly to brush off the ridiculous notion but in his eyes, I saw that he knew it was true with just as much certainty as I did.
“It is what everyone wants, isn’t it?” I asked with a bitter laugh, “Every living creature, human or otherwise, is afraid to die. Yet here we are, wondering whether the gift of eternal life is right. We are not sure if we even want it.”
“It’s too much to think about now. Jesus, Brynn…” He muttered incredulously, “That was a bombshell and a half.”
“I know. I should have given you a warning. I am sorry.”
Don appeared in the doorway behind us.
“So, what have you decided? Good, you’re awake, James. How do you feel?”
“Seven of your people beat the shit out of me while I was still too drugged up to win the fight. How do you think?” James asked, and I watched his eyes turn red.
“Relax. Look at me.” I had both of my hands on his face, “We need to let this go, baby.”
“I’ll let it go.” James told me loudly enough so Don could hear. “But you don’t want to know what I’m going to do if it happens again. In a fair fight, those seven guys would have been nothing by the time I was done with them. Let me remind you, too, that it took seven of your best people to take me down. Keep that in mind, Don, if ever you decide to pull that shit again but especially, and you better listen and absorb every last syllable of this, especially if you put your hands on her again!”
“I don’t doubt any of that, James, what with your newly acquired strength. No one will be trying to hurt you, her, or the other kids again. That is a promise.” Don was slightly rattled by James's threat but he plowed forward with the conversation, trying to keep things upbeat. “So, has Brynna told you what I have offered?”
“Shelter, food, community. Yeah, she told me.”
“And what have the two of you decided?”
“We don’t really have much of a choice, do we?” James spat at him, “It’s either stay here and live or try to make it out there where there are natives and Shadows around every turn, amongst other things. Let me ask you, what do you think our decision is?”
“James…” I raised my eyebrows, warning him without words that we needed to make nice with those people, despite how sickening it was. I certainly was not going to grovel but I was not going to complicate the situation with animosity and obvious aggression, either.
“Alright,” He barked at me somewhat more angrily than I expected, “I'm done.”
“I’ll go get Robert. He has the keys to your handcuffs.”
“Thanks, honey!” James called after him sarcastically.
“Hey…” I grasped his chin lightly and spoke as sternly as I could when he switched into his angry, disdainful mode. I found it very entertaining when said anger was not directed at me. “If we want to stay here, you are going to have to play nice with the big kids on the playground, lest you wish to get sand kicked in your face. And do not snap furiously at your girlfriend, lest you wish for chastity.”
He could not help it. Despite his irritation at my suggestion, he laughed.
“You know I don’t wish for that. Not in the slightest. God, I’ve had a really hard day and you’re threatening me with that? What are you? Oh, right; you're a monster. That's what.”
I giggled again before returning to the topic at hand.
“I am serious, James. We need to try for peace with these people. I do not trust them as far as I can throw them, especially since they have teamed up with Adam. But we need to stay here for our own safety. We are both proud to a fault. We need to suppress our urge to be vain and just go with the flow, as they say.”
“Baby, this is…” He stopped upon seeing the disapproving look on my face. “Do you really want to do this?”
“I do not want to. I just know that we have to. I will tell you the details of my conversation with Don at a more convenient time. Right now, you will just have to trust me when I say that we need to be here.”
He was still frowning when he nodded but when he kissed me again, I knew that his dismay and irritation were not directed at me.
“Only for your sake, my love.”
I beamed brightly at the endearment and pressed my head to his chest. He rested his own on top of mine and I closed my eyes, knowing that he was reluctant to stay but so thankful that we were. We were going to keep one eye open when we slept, surely. But at least we did not have to worry that natives would cut our throats in the middle of the night. We could handle the humans easily. We were evolving and most of them were not.
I could not help but believe that we had the whole situation under control at last. However, believing was very different than knowing, I had discovered.
I knew that the danger was still evident around every turn. I knew that if there was ever a time to run, this was it.
What I don’t know is why I didn’t.
XXX
Violet, Elijah and Penny were not handcuffed. When I entered each of their rooms, they hugged me, asked if I was alright, inquired about James’s whereabouts and then expressed their desire to leave and never return.
“We’re staying.” I told them when we were all together in a group. Violet, who had been embracing James, turned to look at me, eyes wide in surprise.
“What do you mean, we’re staying? Brynn, they dragged us out of the jungle in the middle of the day, they threw us in cells…”
“Yes, they were very untoward. They were not kind. However, we all know that trekking through the jungle is unsafe. Our experience in the cave was enough of an indication. It was more than a fair warning. We need to stay here with other people who can protect us, if need be.”
“We were doing fine protecting ourselves.” Elijah spat angrily, “We’re evolving. Most of the people here aren’t, I'd be willing to bet.”
“Wasn’t this always our endgame, though?” James chimed in to help me out, “Weren’t we headed here to begin with?”
“Yeah, before the monstrous squid-shark experience, we were headed here. That should have been enough of a sign.” Violet crossed her arms over her chest, closing herself off to any further reasoning. I was still going to try to explain whether she was open to hearing the logistical details behind my decision or not.
“I am aware that we are all upset. But they are offering us a place to stay. Everyone works around here, so we would have to be alright with that. But we will have a
supply of food, constant shelter, and there is strength in numbers, like we have always said.”
“Look, Brynn, I can see why you think this would be a good idea.” Elijah told me after a moment of pondering all I had said. “But there was no reason for them to drag us out the woods like that. We really thought that they were natives and I almost killed one of them.”
“Well, clearly they are not that offended at your violent outburst because you are still standing here.”
“I don’t trust that guy.”
“It’s not Don that I don’t trust.” Violet disagreed, “He’s nothing. He’s not a threat at all. I mean, look at him…”
We all turned to observe Don who was talking quietly to Adam. I did not hone in on their conversation because I knew that Adam would sense it. I had already experienced the mind-numbing pain he inflicted on those who rudely eavesdropped.
“He’s nothing,” Violet repeated, “It’s that other guy. What did you say his name was?”
“Adam. But you need to remember that he saved your life when he certainly didn’t have to. Because of that, we should at least try to trust him.” James told her.
“James, they beat you up. How can you not want to do the same to them?” Violet changed tactics quickly; she was now appealing to his ruthless pride. Smart move, Violet Mae…
His expression darkened suddenly at the mention of it. I grasped his hand in mine and linked our fingers together. He looked at me and softened immediately. I smiled at him before looking away.
“Your sister is right,” James told them, “We don’t have a choice. We have to stay here.”
“They know that we’re changing over.” Elijah told us. “I heard two of the guards talking about it. I understand that we need to be part of a group but I don’t think that aligning ourselves with people who hang their freaking dismembered enemies from trees…”
“That is enough.” I snapped at him. I looked down at Penny, who held my other hand even tighter at the mention of the poor souls left to hang in the woods. “You didn’t see that, did you?”
The Shattered Genesis (Eternity) Page 50
