by Linda Kage
“Eva!” she hissed harshly. “What the hell are you doing? That’s sexual assault.”
Eva merely sniffed as she picked herself up and dusted off her backside. “Whatever. He’s a prostitute, ReeRee. He’s nothing.”
I sucked in a breath. It was one thing to be called that and to believe it because I lived it, but letting Reese hear it sprayed around so casually stung. I didn’t like her thinking I was shit.
But I guess she didn’t buy into Eva’s accusations. She retorted, “He’s a human being! He has just as many rights not to be harassed every time he turns around as you or I do. And how dare you do this to Alec? Were you seriously just going to cheat on him?”
Lifting her nose with a sniff, Eva muttered, “You’re blind if you can’t see I just did this for you.”
“Me?” Reese gaped in disbelief. “I guess I’m totally blind then. How did you do this for me?”
“He’s not good for you. I was trying to keep him away from you.”
Sighing, Reese rubbed at a spot on the center of her forehead. “Believe it or not, E, you don’t have to bother. Mason and I are just friends.”
Eva shook her head sadly. “Yeah, right. Keep telling yourself that, sweetie. Maybe someday our dead Grandma Dixon will actually believe it.” Searing me with a glare, she hissed, “You know better than to pant after her.”
Then she sniffed and stormed off.
Reese remained next to me. Afraid to even look at her, I closed my eyes briefly before sucking up the fear and just turning her way to blurt, “I’m sorry.”
Her face crinkled with confusion before she said, “For what?”
I lifted my hands only to let them fall hopelessly at my sides. “I just knocked your cousin to the floor.”
“You don’t have to apologize for that,” she told me. “I’m surprised you didn’t dump her off your lap sooner.”
And now I felt like an idiot for not shoving Eva away sooner, because I’d certainly wanted to, I just hadn’t thought I should. It still felt weird knowing I’d hurt her, even in a minor way. And last night, I’d grabbed Patricia’s wrist as roughly as I could.
A fear unfurled inside me, making me wonder if I was coming apart at the seams. It didn’t matter if they’d deserved my treatment, I couldn’t believe I’d hurt two women in less than a single twenty-four-hour period.
As if reading all the guilt spiraling through me, Reese gripped my arm and then hugged me. “I never meant to bring the wrath of Eva down on you.” She winced apologetically.
Not expecting the contact, my muscles contracted in confused surprise. “You didn’t,” I insisted, afraid to hug her back because I might not ever let her go. “I brought it on myself.”
So she ended up pulling back all on her own to scowl at me. “Just because you had some misguided notion when you were eighteen, thinking you had to do something drastic and unnecessary to save your family, doesn’t mean you deserve to be treated with such constant degradation by every woman who crosses your path.”
Her defense caused a longing ache to tear through me. I had a bad feeling this girl already owned my soul. Spotting a stray piece of silken dark hair that had fallen into her face during her impassioned speech, I reached for it and tucked it safely behind her ear.
“You’re not like anyone I’ve ever met before,” I admitted without meaning to. “Where did you come from, Reese Randall?”
She blinked at me once, obviously not expecting my reaction, then she said, “Ellamore, Illinois.”
I grinned, my chest filling with both joy and pain because I knew this moment couldn’t last. Deciding to make the best of it before it was over, I hauled her back into my arms and hugged her back to me.
I buried my nose in her hair, inhaling her sweet pea scent, even as my fingers wandered, finding the scar on the back of her neck. Then I leaned around to kiss the spot.
“Thank you for being my friend. But Mercer was right. I do know better than to pant after you. You should never have to deal with any of my shit.” I stepped back before picking up the Harry Potter book Eva had tossed to the floor. After grabbing my bag as well, I sent her one last farewell glance. “I’ll see you around.”
Except we both knew I wouldn’t. I was really going to stay away this time.
At least, I hoped I could, even as another part of me cheered for me to fail…again.
Confession #21: So, yeah, I’m never drinking again.
Patricia waited a week after her threat to ruin Reese before she struck again.
It was the Saturday evening after my encounters in the library with Reese, Eva, and Monica. For once, neither Mom nor I had to work, so she, Sarah, and I had landed in the living room after we actually ate a meal together at the dinner table, and we were watching old episodes of Hawaii Five-O, all shows Sarah had already seen and kept trying to give us spoilers to, when my phone sounded from my pocket, alerting me to a new text message.
These days, I didn’t dread the sound as much as I once used to. Before Reese, it usually only meant a client wanted service. But now… Now, sometimes it was Reese sending me a cheerful little note, letting me know we were still friends, even though she blatantly told me I was being an idiot for staying away.
Sarah has been nestled in my arms where we both sat lounging on the couch with our legs stretched out and bare feet resting on the cushions. When she glanced up at me with worry, as if she sensed snuggle time was over, I sent her a reassuring grin and kissed the end of her nose. No client could drag me away from quality time with my mom and sister tonight, and Reese only ever talked, so I didn’t plan on moving a muscle.
Until I read the message.
Landlady: I just learned something very interesting about your little REESE. If you don’t want it exposed to the world, you’ll come over tonight and ask me what my fantasy is.
I snorted and deleted the message. When I tucked the phone back into my pocket, I sent Sarah another reassuring grin and ruffled her hair, letting her know I wasn’t leaving. Her expression relaxed, the worry draining from her eyes, and she settled back against me, just as Mom asked something about the show from her chair across the room.
As Sarah answered, however, my mind shifted back to the message. My initial instinct had been to blow the whole thing off and ignore it. But then I started to worry. I had no idea what Patricia thought she had on Reese. Not a molecule inside me believed it could be that bad, but still… What if it was private to Reese? What if it hurt her if it was exposed? And why had Patricia typed her name in all caps as if that were some kind of clue?
I didn’t know, but my anxiety grew. Patricia sometimes made empty threats. But not always. If she actually knew something that Reese didn’t want publicized, she would share it with the world without a single qualm.
My apprehensions won, and I shifted under Sarah, clutching her waist to lift her off me. “Actually,” I said, wincing in apology, “maybe I do need to go after all.”
“But what about the show?” Sarah said, her eyes begging me to stay.
“I’ll finish it tomorrow, I promise.”
Her gaze filled with disappointed censure. “Before or after my party?”
Shit. That was right. Her big thirteenth birthday party was tomorrow. “Either,” I said. “Both.”
Mom finally glanced over, frowning in confusion. “What’s going on?”
I set my sister back on the couch, trying to arrange her so she’d be just as comfortable as she’d been on me. Glancing distractedly at Mom, I explained, “I got called into work.” When she lifted her eyebrows, I added, “At the Country Club,” so she wouldn’t think I was going to a client.
But she didn’t seem to believe me anyway. Her expression flooded with judgment before she went back to watching the show. “Okay. See you later.”
Sarah focused on the television, moodily refusing to look at me again.
I kissed the top of her head, anyway, promising her again that we’d finish the show tomorrow, then I dashed away. When
I pushed through the back door, I glanced toward Patricia’s house. She had the porch light on for me to see my way to her place. Rolling my eyes, I walked right past the gate that led from my backyard to hers. Then I hopped into my Jeep and started the engine, speeding to the apartment Reese was staying in above the Mercer’s garage.
I had to check on her, make sure she was okay. Patricia was malicious enough that she would exact the bad terms in her ultimatum before she even issued them, so she could have her cake and eat it too, just as Monica had done when she’d tricked me into sleeping with her after she’d already told Patricia about Reese’s identity.
But I wasn’t falling for it this time. If she was going to attack Reese, I was going to be with Reese to help her deal with any problems that might arise.
I bounded up the outside steps that led to her door and knocked before I even thought a plan through. A few seconds later, a hesitant voice called through the closed partition.
“Who is it?”
Oh, right. She totally wasn’t expecting me to just show up at her place on a Saturday night. Feeling chagrined, I answered, “It’s Mason.”
I don’t think she actually believed me. A second later, a crack of light appeared in the window blinds, and I saw two familiar blue eyes peer out.
When I waved, the blinds snapped shut, and I heard about three different locking mechanisms grind open.
The door swung in, revealing a backlit silhouette of my Reese, and then her voice followed. “Mason?”
And holy shit, that’s all it took. After trying to keep my distance for so long, seeing her now was like releasing a pressure cooker too fast. All these emotions poured out of me, and I just needed…her. For my own peace of mind.
God, this girl was important to me. How the hell had she managed to get so important to me?
“Can we talk?” I asked, not planning to say that. “I just… I need to talk…to someone.”
Not just someone; I only needed to talk to her. I didn’t even care what we talked about. I just needed to be here, with her, listening to her voice and her laugh and soaking in all the brightness that she shed just by being her.
“Um…” She tucked a strand of hair behind her ear, only to find a piece of popcorn stuck in the tresses. When she batted it free, I could only smile, because it was such a Reese thing for her to do. “Okay,” she said as if she wasn’t sure if it was really okay or not, even as she stepped back and opened the door wider. “Come on in.”
She might’ve been physically letting me in, but I could tell in her voice she hadn’t wanted to say yes. Feeling like an idiot for only thinking of myself and what I wanted, I stepped back. Lifting a hand, I said, “If this is a bad time, I can leave.”
She rolled her eyes. “Mason, seriously. Get inside now.”
Okay, this time she didn’t sound quite so reluctant. She grabbed my arm and tugged me into the apartment.
And inside I went.
“Rise and shine, sleeping beauty.”
The greeting woke me completely. For a moment, I couldn’t remember falling asleep, what time or day it was, or even where I was. I could tell I was lying sprawled out on my stomach on a bed, my cheek mashed into a pillow that smelled surprising familiar, but it definitely wasn’t my pillow. Light flooded my closed eyelids, telling me it was daytime, or at least well into the morning.
“What the hell?” I croaked, lifting my face to gaze around the minuscule bedroom I was in. I looked in the direction the voice had come from, only to find Reese standing there, holding two to-go cups of her favorite breakfast drink.
“Reese?” I said, growing more confused than ever.
What in God’s name was going on?
“Morning,” she greeted perkily, taking a sip from one of the cups. “So, I went out and bought us some breakfast. There are doughnuts in the front room.” Then she rolled her eyes. “I know, I know. ‘Reese, you’re so amazing and wonderful. Thanks for thinking of me. You shouldn’t have.’ But, really, it’s no problem. Anything for my buddy. So… De nada.”
I blinked, digesting what she said, though it told me nothing of where I was or how I’d gotten here. Glancing around, however, it didn’t take me long to realize I was in her room, in her bed, and that familiar smell surrounding me… That was her scent. The morning light from the window made me wince, my head pounding from… What the hell? Did I have a hangover?
I hadn’t actually drunk alcohol last night, had I? That made no sense. I rarely drank.
But my mouth was dry and nasty enough to think maybe I had. It would certainly explain the memory loss.
“This is your room,” I finally mumbled, my mind moving slowly as if it were trying to work through spun sugar.
“Yep,” she answered.
I nodded and glanced her way. “What am I doing in your bed?”
“You said the couch was too short.”
I frowned, not remembering that at all. I didn’t remember…
Okay, I remembered coming to her apartment last night to check on her after Patricia’s threatening text and Reese letting me inside. Then I think we drank…gin. Yes, gin. And then we ate popcorn as we watched a movie, maybe. Or maybe not. After that…nothing.
I remembered absolutely nothing else.
Oh, God. What was I not remembering? How had I gotten in her bed? What had I done in her bed?
Holding my breath, I dared to ask, “So, did we…?”
Her mouth fell open as if outraged. “Seriously, Mason,” she accused. “How could you forget the magical night we shared together?” She held her cup up to her heart as if clutching the wounded organ. “It was…beautiful.”
Wait. What?
We hadn’t really…?
No. We couldn’t have. We couldn’t do that and I not remember a single moment of it. Karma wouldn’t be that cruel. Except… Yes, yes, it really would.
“Oh, God. We didn’t,” I uttered, devastated that I could remember nothing of our first time together.
“Hey!” Scowling, she flipped me the bird. “You could at least pretend as if the idea of sleeping with me doesn’t completely repulse you. Gah. I thought you were into me at least a little. I mean, what about your stupid horny guy urges and that freebie you said I could have if I just said the word?”
Horror flooded me. “I… God, Reese. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean it that way. I just…shit. This was not something I’d want to forget.” Swallowing unsteadily, I ran a hand through my hair, feeling sick. I couldn’t believe we’d actually been together and I didn’t even remember it. Why couldn’t I forget every other woman I’d ever been with and remember only Reese? This was no fucking fair.
“Umm… Was it at least good for you?” I tried, flashing her a guilty, wincing kind of smile.
In answer, she threw back her head and laughed, coughing a little when she choked on her drink. “Wow. Oh my God, wow. You don’t remember anything, do you?”
“No,” I admitted glumly. “Nothing.”
“Well, relax, Casanova,” she reassured me. “Nothing happened.”
But…what? “It didn’t?” So I’d spent the entire night in her bed and nothing happened? Well, that sucked too.
She shook her head. “Nope.”
My brow furrowed because that didn’t make any sense either. “You’re saying I came in here, crawled into bed with you, and I didn’t come onto you at all? Why do I find that impossible to believe?”
She merely shrugged. “You were tanked. You just stumbled into my room, burrowed in beside me, and passed out cold. Oh! And then you hogged three-fourths of the mattress and all the sheets. Which is something you really need to work on, buster, because if you ever plan on getting married one day, no wife is going to appreciate that.”
Leave it to Reese to turn everything into a funny. “I’ll keep that in mind,” I said on a small smile. I watched her standing there, holding two drinks, and I wanted to tell her I wished we had done something together and that I could remember every detail. But that pro
bably wasn’t something I should admit.
My bladder chose that moment to wake up, though, and I decided I should probably get up out of her bed because it smelled too much like her.
“Bathroom?” I asked, feeling awkward about having more questions than answers. Like why the hell I’d drank in the first place.
She pointed. “Right there.”
“Thanks.” I popped up and streaked across the room, surprised to learn I wore nothing but a pair of jockey shorts.
Why had I stripped down to my underwear?
I had a feeling Reese wasn’t telling me quite everything that had happened last night.
I remembered rushing over to check on her after getting that worrisome text from Patricia. But Reese seemed fine this morning, not like any of her dark secrets had been exposed to the world. So why had I stayed?
Probably because I could never resist any chance I got to remain in Reese’s company. It didn’t seem to matter what my intentions were to protect her; I had absolutely no willpower where she was concerned. I had a bad feeling it was probably going to be both our downfalls.
I took my time in the bathroom, washing my face and cupping water in my hands to get a drink. Then I stole some of her ibuprofen and opened the door to find my clothes in a pile on her bed. Then I returned to the bathroom and hastily jerked them on. Except it sucked in there with no space to dress. After banging my knee against the sink and my elbow on a towel rack, I exited to put my shirt on in the bedroom, only to hear Reese talking in the front room. Assuming she was on the phone and worried her call might have something to do with Patricia’s threats, I rushed from her bedroom, still tugging on my shirt, only to find she wasn’t on the phone. She had company.
Shit.
Eva’s mouth dropped open as we made eye contact. Reese tried to act as if nothing were awkward about the moment, but I made it worse when I asked if she knew where my shoes were, because I had no clue. We both tried to ignore Eva glaring at me and crossing her arms over her chest. I asked Reese if she was still coming to my sister’s birthday party later that day, and she reassured me she was. Then she gave me my drink she’d bought me along with my doughnut. I kissed her on the cheek in gratitude.
