by Maya Blake
No, he had no words of comfort. He’d trashed everything good in his life, and had come close to dismantling his relationship with his brother last year. The last thing he wanted to do was admit to Raven that part of his refusal to speak to his father was because he didn’t want to discover whether he was irredeemably trashed in his father’s eyes too.
His gaze flicked to the cars lining up on the track. Unlike the normal grand prix races when the cars lined up according to their qualifying time, the six All-Star cars were lined up side by side.
Team El Camino’s red and black racer, driven by the young driver he’d been working with, was the first off the mark. Rafael felt a spurt of pride, which he immediately doused.
He had no right to feel pride. All he’d done was take what his father had taught him and passed it on. His father deserved the credit here, not him.
‘Don’t be so hard on yourself.’
Irrational anger sprang up within him. The fact that she seemed so determined to make him feel better when she was content to wallow in her own daddy issues filled him with anger. The fact that he was sexually frustrated—heck, he was going on eight months without having had sex—was setting his teeth on edge. The fact that he was up here, cooling his heels when he wanted more than anything to be down there...behind the wheel of a racing car—
Ice chilled his veins as he acknowledged the full extent of what he was feeling.
‘Rafael?’
He didn’t respond or turn towards her. Instead he watched the screen as Axel Jung threatened to take the lead from the young driver.
‘Rafael, are you okay?’
‘Do me a favour, querida, and stop talking. You’re holding a mirror up to my numerous flaws. There’s only so much I can take before I have to revert to type. And since you don’t want that, I suggest you let me absorb a few of them and concentrate on enjoying this race, sí?’
Far from doing what he expected of her, which was to retreat into sullen silence or—from experience with other women—flounce off in feminine affront, she merely picked up the remote that operated the giant screen in their section and turned it on. Then she picked up the menu, asked him what he wanted for lunch, then ordered it for them, her face set in smooth, neutral lines.
He waited several minutes, despising the emotion that ate away his insides like acid on metal. Guilt. An emotion he didn’t like to acknowledge.
Guilt for upsetting her. ‘I’m sorry,’ he said.
A shapely eyebrow lifted in his direction, then she nodded. ‘It’s okay. I don’t like dredging up my past either. I guess I should learn to respect yours.’
‘But I seem to invite you to dig, which is very unlike me.’ He frowned.
A tiny, perfect smile played around lips he remembered tasting. A craving such as he’d never known punched through him. Right in that moment, all he wanted to do was taste her again. Keep on tasting her until there were no clothes between them. Then he would taste her in the most elemental way possible. Right between her legs.
He would so enjoy watching her come. Again and again. And again.
Normally, he would have been thrilled by the natural path of his thoughts, but Rafael admitted his need held a previously unknown edge to it...an almost desperate craving he’d never experienced before. He wanted Raven. And yet a part of him was terrified by the depth of his need.
Forcing himself not to analyse it too closely, he returned his attention to the track and felt a further spurt of discontentment when he saw Axel Jung had taken the lead.
Lunch was delivered and they ate in truce-like silence.
When Axel Jung took the race by a half second, Rafael tried to force back his black mood. As the CEO of the company organising the event, he had to step up to the podium and say a few words.
‘If your jaw tightens any further, you’ll do yourself an injury,’ Raven murmured next to him.
‘I’m smiling, querida, like the great racer slash CEO that I am,’ he muttered back, turning towards her.
This close, her perfume filled his nostrils and invaded his senses. She gave a laugh and raised a sceptical brow. ‘We both know you want to throw your toys out of the pram because the team you silently support came second. You’re supposed to be unbiased, remember?’
He moved closer to her, felt the brush of her arm against his side and the depth of need intensified. ‘I am unbiased. I just wanted my young driver to win, that’s all,’ he said, unrepentant.
Her teasing laugh and the way she bumped his shoulder in playful admonition unravelled him further. He glanced down into her face and his breath strangled at her breathtaking beauty.
A shout made him turn. Axel had stepped off the podium and was making his way towards them. Or Raven in particular, if the interest in his eyes was anything to go by.
Before conscious thought formed, Rafael moved, deliberately blocking the German from accessing the woman beside him. His woman.
‘Congratulations, Jung. I think the press want their interview now.’ He deftly turned the German towards the waiting paparazzi. As moves went, Rafael thought it was supremely smooth, but Raven’s gasp told him the grace had been lost on her.
‘Did you just do what I think you did?’
‘That depends. Did you want him to come over here and slobber all over you?’
She shuddered. ‘No, but I’m not sure I wanted a blatant territory-marking from you either.’
He wanted to tell her that he wished the whole paddock knew to keep away from her. But he knew it wouldn’t go down well. It would also point out just how much he detested the idea of Raven with any other man. ‘Point taken.’
Her eyes widened. ‘Wow, I’m not sure whether to feel suspicious or special that you’ve conceded a point to me.’
‘You should feel special.’ His gaze trapped and held hers. ‘Very special.’
Raven returned his stare, trying to summon a tiny bit of ire beneath all the high octane, breath-stealing emotions coursing through her. But the excitement licking along her nerve endings put the effort to shame.
Something of her feelings must have shown on her face because his eyes darkened dramatically. His gaze dropped to her lips, the heated pulse beating a wild rhythm in her neck, then back to her face.
Calmly, he breathed out and gave her a slow, electrifying smile. Eyes still locked on hers, he pulled out his phone and spoke in clear tones. Unfortunately, Spanish wasn’t her forte so she had no clue what he was saying. But she made out the word avión, which made her even more curious.
‘What was that about?’ she asked when he hung up.
‘I’ve arranged for our things to be packed. I thought we might head to Mexico a couple of days earlier than the rest of the racers.’
‘Won’t you be needed?’
‘Possibly, but for the next two days I’m taking your advice and delegating. Does this make you happy?’
There was a deeper question beneath the stated one, a hungry gleam in his eyes that boldly proclaimed his intention should she agree to what he was proposing.
In a single heartbeat, Raven accepted it. ‘Yes.’
It was almost a relief to let go of the angst and the rigid control. At least for a while. She knew without a shadow of a doubt that it would return a hundredfold soon enough.
CHAPTER NINE
SHE WAS GOING to take a lover. She was going to lose her virginity to the very man she’d run a mile from last year. The man who would most likely break her heart into a tiny million pieces long before this thing between them was over.
Nerves threatened to eat her up as their tiny seaplane banked and headed towards the private beachfront of the stunning villa Rafael owned in Los Cabos, Mexico. By now she knew all about the eighteen-bedroom villa, the lower level sauna and steam room, the two swimming pools and the names of eve
ry member of the construction crew who’d built the villa to Rafael’s exact specification three years ago.
Because she’d needed to babble, to fill her head with white noise to distract her from the urge to spill the fact that she hadn’t done this before. The closer they drew to their destination, the higher panic had flared beneath the surface of her outward calm.
Rafael’s experience with women was world-renowned. What if she made a spectacular fool of herself? What if he was so put off by her inexperience he recoiled from her? To silence the voices, she babbled some more, found out that he had a staff of five who managed the villa and that he practised his handicap on the legendary golf course nearby when the occasion suited him.
In direct contrast to her nervous chirping, Rafael had been circumspect, his watchful silence unlike anything she’d ever known. Although he’d answered her questions with inexhaustible patience, his eyes had remained riveted on her the whole time, occasionally dropping to her lips as if he couldn’t wait to taste, to devour.
They touched down on the water and powered to a stop next to a large wooden jetty. After alighting, they headed towards an open-topped jeep for the short drive to the villa.
Even though she felt as if she knew the property inside and out, Raven wasn’t prepared for the sheer, jaw-dropping beauty of the adobe white-washed walls, the highly polished exposed beams and almost ever-present sea views from the windows of the mission-style villa. Spanish-influenced paintings adorned the walls, lending a rich tapestry to the luxurious interior.
In her bedroom, rich fabrics in earthy colours formed the backdrop to a mostly white theme set against warm terracotta floors. But one item drew her attention.
‘What’s this for?’ She touched the black high-powered telescope that stood before one large window.
He came and stood behind her, bringing that warm, evocative scent that she’d come to associate with him and only him. It took an insane amount of willpower not to lean back into his hard-packed body.
‘The waters around here are well-known grounds for sperm whales. They tend to come closer to shore first thing in the morning. If you’re lucky you’ll spot a few while we’re here.’
Again the sombre, almost guarded response caught her off-guard. She glanced at him over her shoulder. He returned her stare with an intensity that made her breath catch. After a full minute, he lifted his hand and drifted warm fingers down her cheek in a soothing, belly-melting gesture.
‘You’re nervous, bonita. Don’t be. I promise it will be good.’
Her laugh was aimed at herself as much as at him. ‘That’s easy for you to say.’
His finger touched and stayed on the pulse jumping in her throat. ‘It isn’t. I haven’t done this for a long time, too. Hell, I don’t know if the equipment works.’
He gave a wry smile when her brows shot up. ‘You don’t?’
‘You will be the first since a while before the accident.’
‘But I felt...I know you...’
‘Can get a hard-on? Sí, but I’m yet to test the practical integrity of the machinery.’
‘Oh, so I’m to be your guinea pig?’ she teased, a little appeased that she wasn’t the only one climbing walls about the prospect of them together.
‘Guinea pigs don’t have mouths like yours, or eyes the colour of a desert oasis. Or breasts that cry out to be suckled. Or the most perfect heart-shaped ass that makes me want to put you face down and straddle—’
‘Okay, I get it. I’m hotter than a Greek furnace.’ Her eyes strayed to the perfectly made up bed, her imagination running wild. She swallowed. ‘I...I’d like a tour of the outside now, if you don’t mind.’
His finger drifted up to the corner of her mouth, pressed gently before he put his finger to his own lips and groaned.
‘If that’s what you want.’
She nodded.
He didn’t heed her request right away. He leaned down, placed his lips at the juncture between her neck and shoulder and ran his tongue over her thundering pulse. He answered her groan with one of his own, then he reluctantly stepped back. Raven was glad when he offered his arm because her legs had grown decidedly shaky.
The heeled leather boots she’d worn with her jeans and black-edged white shirt clicked alongside his heavier tread as they went outside.
On one side, an extensive stretch of grass led to a large thatched poolside bar surrounded by potted palm trees.
Beside it, an area clearly designated for relaxing featured a hot tub under long bales of white linen that had been intertwined to form a stunning canopy that offered shade. After the chill of Europe, it was a balm to feel the sun on her face.
‘Come, there’s something I want to show you.’ There was heated anticipation in the low rumble that fluttered over her skin, feeding her own sizzling emotions.
Rafael led her across the grass and down shallow steps to the private, secluded beach. All through the tour, his hand had been drifting up and down her back, stealing her thoughts and playing havoc with her pulse.
Which meant that she was totally unprepared for the sight that confronted her when he led her round a rock-sheltered cove.
The thick timber four-poster canopy had been erected right on the shore, with a massive day bed suspended by thick intertwined ropes. The sight was so vividly breathtaking, and so unexpectedly raw and pagan, she stopped in her tracks.
There was only one reason for the bed.
Sex. Outdoor sex.
Heat engulfed her whole body as Rafael’s gaze met and trapped hers.
‘The high rocks shield even the most determined lenses. And see those?’ He indicated three discreetly placed floodlights pointing out towards the water. ‘They come on at night and send a glare out to sea so any cunning paparazzi out there get nothing but glare when they try and get pictures of the villa.’
She swallowed hard. ‘Even so, I can’t imagine doing...it so blatantly.’
He caught her hand in his and kissed her palm. ‘Never say never. Now, I believe we have a therapy session to work through?’
The fact that she’d forgotten her main reason for being there made her uncomfortable.
She hastened to cover it up. ‘Yes, and don’t hate me, but we’ll need to step things up a bit.’
‘Do with me what you will, querida. I’m but putty in your hands.’
He led the way back into the villa and into his bedroom. The setting sun threw orange shades across the king-size wooden-framed bed that seemed to dominate the room. When he threw his walking stick on the exquisitely designed recliner facing the double doors leading to a large balcony, she was reminded again why she was here with Rafael in the first place.
She’d cautioned him against sex only a handful of days ago, and yet here she was, unable to think beyond the raging need to strip every piece of clothing from his body.
Guilt ate away inside her.
‘I can hear you thinking again. And I don’t feel warm and fuzzy about the direction of your thoughts.’ He started to unbutton his shirt.
She tried and failed not to let her eyes linger over his muscular chest and down over his washboard stomach, following the faint line of hair that disappeared beneath his jeans.
‘Is this where we hold hands and pray about whether we should have sex or not?’
He was back. The irreverent, sexy, endlessly charismatic man who had women the world over falling at his feet.
Or was he?
A careful look into his eyes showed not the gleam of irreverence but a quietly speculative look beneath his words. ‘Are you afraid you’ll hate sex with me? Or afraid you’ll love it so much you’ll beg to become a groupie?’
She shook her head. ‘As much as I want it to be easy, I’ve never taken a decision lightly. And I don’t think you should either. It’s not just me I�
��m thinking about here, Rafael. What if all this turns around on you? What if we do this and you get even more damaged?’
‘Then I’ll learn to live with it. Come here,’ he said, holding out his hand. Although his mouth was smiling, his eyes held a very firm command.
She had to dig her toes in to stay put. ‘You’ll live with it because you think you deserve all the bad things that happen to you?’
His smile slowly eroded until only a trace remained. ‘Raven, it’s time to stop being my therapist and just be my lover.’
‘Rafael...’
‘Come. Here.’
He held still, hands outstretched. Almost against her will, she found herself moving forward. He waited until she was within touching distance. Then he lunged for her, sliding his fingers between hers to entrap her.
With his other hand he pulled her close, his fingers spreading over her bottom. Moving forward, he backed her against the wall, enclosing her thighs between his. ‘I’ve got you now. No escape. Now, are you going to undress or do you need help?’
She gnawed on her lower lip, rioting emotions tearing her apart. ‘I was so sure I wanted this, Rafael, but I’ll never forgive myself if I make things worse for you—’
He growled, ‘Damn it, just get naked, will you?’
When she remained still, he took the task into his own hands. For a man who hadn’t slept with a woman for almost a year, he didn’t seem to lack the skill needed to undress her.
She was down to her bra and knickers within seconds. One deft flick of his fingers disposed of her bra. Slowly he took one step back, then another.
‘Dios, I knew you would be worth it,’ he rasped, his fiercely intent gaze making her skin heat up and pucker in all the right places. Grabbing her by the waist, he reversed their positions and walked her back towards the bed. At the back of her mind she knew she needed to tell him about her lack of experience. But words were in short supply when confronted with the perfection that was Rafael’s muscled torso.
With one firm push, she lay sprawled on the bed. He placed one knee on the bed, pushed forward, then winced as he positioned himself over her.
