Lily’s eyes were glowing. ‘Oh, that’s great, Ann. Will you be getting married then?’
I laughed. ‘I don’t think so, Lily – there won’t be enough time.’
I spent the following week in a frenzy of excitement. I went through my meagre wardrobe, wondering what to wear at the station. I was determined to look my best as I wanted to knock Greg over with my beauty. On the other hand, while studying my reflection in the mirror, I decided that a smart outfit would have to do the trick as beauty was out of the question.
Connie noticed the spring in my step and she was pleased for me. I knew I was fortunate to have Greg coming home, even if it was for such a short time – unlike the thousands of men in the army, navy and air force.
Connie said one morning, ‘If you don’t mind wearing something of mine, Ann, I’ve got this lovely suit I bought before the war and you’re about the same size I was then. You can borrow it if you want.’
I didn’t think I would want to do that – it was probably something frumpy. However, I also didn’t want to hurt her feelings so I said I would go to see her that evening.
Connie’s flat was in Stirling Street. The close was clean and well maintained and Connie lived on the top floor. In spite of all the wartime shortages, she had a good going fire and she made a pot of tea and a plate of toast. A small pot of marmalade stood beside this plate and I was impressed.
‘Marmalade, Connie? You must have saved up lots of coupons for that.’
She smiled and shook her head. ‘No, I didn’t buy it. I used to make lots of jam and marmalade before the war and as a result I had a cupboard full of jars. Mind you, I’m down to my last couple of jars now.’
While I was savouring the tangy taste of the marmalade, Connie disappeared into her bedroom to get the suit. I tried to compose my face so it didn’t register deep disappointment at what I thought must be a musty old costume. That’s what made my delight all the more noticeable. The suit was lovely. The deep-blue jacket and dress had a quality that wartime clothes lacked. The ‘Utility’ label was on everything now and this meant the garment was cut to the bare minimum and there were no trimmings or nice buttons – just the bare bones of the garment.
‘Go into the room and try it on – I think it’ll fit you a treat.’
It did. I fastened the large chunky buttons of the jacket and I felt so comfortable in it. And the colour was marvellous. I stood in front of the large mirror on the front of the wardrobe and surveyed myself. I was suddenly transported back to Mrs Barrie’s bedroom in the Ferry, to the day she gave me a gorgeous russet cashmere coat with the fox-trimmed cuffs and collar – the lovely coat that Hattie coveted and Miss Hood so callously burned.
I said to Connie, ‘What can I say? If you don’t mind me borrowing it for the weekend, I’d love to have it.’
Connie beamed. ‘It looks lovely on you, Ann. Greg will be bowled over when he sees you – you mark my words!’
I lived the next few days in a frenzy of anticipation, barely able to sleep at night for the thought of seeing Greg again – it had been so long.
Saturday, 6 December duly dawned and I took Lily to the Overgate as I wanted to meet Greg on my own. His train was due in at five o’clock and it would be a very short reunion because he had to catch the three o’clock train the next day. Still, it was better than no meeting at all.
I was dressed early so I decided to pay a quick visit to the Hilltown to show Rosie my new suit. I had barely reached the stairs when Dad appeared. His face was red and he was agitated.
‘Ann, thank goodness you’re here. I was going to ask Connie to get you. Rosie’s pains have started and she thinks the bairn’s coming.’
‘But she isn’t due till the end of the month, Dad,’ I said. ‘Maybe it’s just a false alarm but you better take her to the hospital as a precaution.’
He looked as if he was going to burst into tears. He wiped his face with a huge red handkerchief. ‘I don’t think I can take her to the hospital, Ann. I can’t face the place after that unhappy time when your mum died there.’ He was referring to the awful time when Mum had been taken there after haemorrhaging after Lily’s birth – that terrible night of her death.
Dad was distressed. ‘I can’t go back there. What if the same thing happens to Rosie?’
‘Can Alice go with her?’
He shook his head. ‘Rosie wonders if you’ll go with her.’
‘But I’m on my way to meet Greg at the railway station, Dad. He’s got this weekend pass and I was looking forward to seeing him again so much.’
Although outwardly calm, I was a mass of conflicting emotions. Please don’t let me miss seeing Greg, I prayed to an unknown god. Of all the days to be born, I thought – on my big day, Master or Miss Neill had decided to enter this world. Perhaps this God was taking revenge on my earlier intention of taking Lily to the Sunday School – an intention that never materialised.
Then I felt contrite. Here was I being selfish while Rosie was sitting at home alone. What were her feelings? I wondered. A lot worse than mine no doubt – having her first baby at her age.
‘All right, Dad, I’ll go to the hospital with Rosie but what about Greg?’
Dad’s face was a picture of relief. ‘I’ll meet him off the train and I’ll tell him where you are.’
We hurried upstairs where Rosie was sitting on the edge of the chair, clutching her stomach. Her face was red and covered with perspiration in spite of the cold December day. She looked so pleased to see me that I felt I’d been really selfish.
‘The pains are coming every ten minutes, Ann,’ she said as a spasm of pain showed on her face.
Every ten minutes? Did we have time to get to the hospital? I wondered?
I helped her up from the chair and managed to get her coat and scarf on.
‘Better wrap up well, Rosie. It’s a nice day outside but it’s a cold wind.’
Dad had obviously talked about his reluctance to go to the infirmary with her because she merely said cheerio.
Dad came down the stairs with us. ‘You’ll be fine, Rosie – I just know it.’
He gave her a quick hug and we set off along the road to the infirmary while Dad would be heading for the railway station.
Before he left us, he asked me, ‘Can you stay with her, Ann? That is if you’re allowed to. I know she’ll appreciate it if she knows you’re near at hand.’
Oh, great, I thought. How long did a labour last? A few hours, a few days, a week?
Rosie gripped my hand tightly and I said I would stay with her as long as she needed me.
I said, ‘Tell Greg where I am and ask if he’ll come and see me at the infirmary.’
He promised he would.
It was a journey I will never forget. Rosie had to keep stopping every few minutes to let a spasm of pain pass and I was frightened out of my wits. What if the baby should arrive here on this cold and windy winter street? I was never so glad to see the entrance to the infirmary and we made our way inside. The nurse on duty took all her particulars and led her away.
Before she left to walk along the corridor, Rosie turned to me. ‘You will wait, won’t you, Ann?’
I nodded. ‘I’ll stay in the waiting room, Rosie. Now just you think about yourself and the baby and I’ll be here.’
The nurse looked quite nonplussed. ‘Is your husband not with you, Mrs Neill?’
‘No, Nurse, he wasn’t at home but my stepdaughter kindly agreed to bring me in.’
It was a lie but I understood the reason for it. Rosie wouldn’t want the infirmary or this cool-faced nurse to think her husband was some sort of moral coward. We all knew the reason for his phobia but maybe the nurses wouldn’t understand. After all, they must be quite used to dealing with death. Maybe not every day but they couldn’t use this excuse to stay away from their duties – even if they wanted too. No, I didn’t think they would understand Dad and his fears.
I sat in the waiting room. It was beginning to fill up with visitors a
nd, in my smart blue suit, I felt like an alien. I looked as if I got lost on my way to a wedding. I got some curious looks but on the whole most people were so absorbed or worried about their loved ones who were patients in the wards that they hardly gave me a passing glance – this smart stranger who looked like she had lost a ten bob note and found a sixpence.
What would Greg say? Every time in the past when we made our plans, something cropped up to change them. It seemed as if nothing had changed. There may have been a war on but I was still being pulled in different directions by my family.
Visiting time came and went and once again I was the sole occupant of the waiting room.
The lodge porter appeared. ‘You can go home, Miss, and come back when the bairn’s born.’
I shook my head. ‘No, I promised I would wait.’
The sky outside was now dark and I stood in the infirmary grounds and gazed at the black expanse of Dudhope Park. The stars glittered in the black night sky and a bitterly cold wind was blowing from the east.
I wondered where Greg was. Surely Dad had managed to pass on my message. But, if he had, then surely Greg would be here by now and both of us would be sitting waiting for a new life to emerge.
At ten o’clock, I was still waiting when the lodge porter appeared. ‘I’ll have to close the doors soon. I don’t think you can wait much longer, Miss.’
Then I’ll just wait outside, I thought. Then Greg appeared and I ran towards him.
‘Greg, I’m waiting for Rosie to have her baby.’
He looked quite grim but maybe he was just cold and miserable like me. ‘So I’ve been told, Ann – just half an hour ago at my lodgings in Victoria Road.’
I was stunned by this blow. ‘Half an hour ago?’ I repeated, like a backward parrot. ‘I sent Dad to meet you at the station to tell you.’
Greg’s face looked grey. ‘Your father went to the station but he forgot what time you told him the train was due in so he arrived late and I was long gone by the time I assume he appeared.’
Poor Greg. ‘I don’t know what to say. What a stupid thing to do!’
Greg seemed to cheer up. Perhaps it was my contrite apology. ‘Oh, well, I’m here now.’
I tucked his arm in mine and we sat on the low wall at the edge of the park. ‘I’m really sorry about this Greg but Dad was in such a panic about Rosie. You do remember I told you that my mum died in this infirmary – just a few hours after Lily’s birth?’ I felt choked up and was surprised that, even after all these years, I could still be reduced to tears by the memory of that terrible night.
Greg leaned towards me and wiped my face with his handkerchief. ‘I remember it, Ann, and it is good of you to come with Rosie.’
‘But I’m not with Rosie, am I? She’s inside the infirmary and we’re standing in the dark like a couple of idiots. Still, I did make a promise.’
Greg laughed. ‘You’re a stickler for keeping promises, aren’t you, Ann?’
I tried to read his expression when he said this but it was too dark. I said, ‘Is that a complaint, Greg?’
He squeezed my hand. ‘Of course not! It’s a compliment and it’s one of the things I like about you.’
A warm glow swept over me and I felt so lucky to have such an understanding fiancé. I was on the point of saying so when suddenly two figures appeared out of the darkness, startling me with their presence. To my surprise, it was Dad and Lily.
‘I couldn’t wait in the house any longer and Lily was driving me crazy with all her questions so I thought we were just as well coming here. Has there been any news?’
‘No, Dad, although the porter did say he would come out and tell me when the baby arrived.’
We made a strange little party, all standing in the darkness of a winter’s night.
‘I’m really sorry, Greg, for getting your train time mixed up,’ said Dad. ‘It was just all this worry with Rosie and the bad memories this place holds for me …’
‘That’s all right – I do understand so don’t give it another thought.’
I mentally thanked Greg for being so kind to Dad.
We all gazed over at the infirmary but it was also in darkness, every window covered with the blackout blinds.
Dad said, ‘I think you should all go home and I’ll wait here.’
It was midnight and I was thinking of Lily being out in the cold night air so I agreed. We had just stood up, our legs stiff with cold, when suddenly a figure appeared from the courtyard. It was the kindly little porter.
‘I can only stay a moment,’ he said, ‘but the maternity ward has just phoned down to say Mrs Neill has had a boy. She was anxious to let you know because she knew your daughter was waiting.’
Quite honestly, I could have kissed him and Dad shook his hand. ‘Thanks for letting us know – it was really good of you to come over.’ He turned to us. ‘A boy! Did you hear that Ann and Lily? You’ve got a baby brother.’
Lily was excited. ‘What are you going to call him, Dad?’
‘He’s to be called after me – John Neill.’ His voice was full of pride and, although I couldn’t see his face, I could just imagine his expression.
‘Congratulations, Mr Neill!’ said Greg.
‘Thanks, son! It’s visiting time tomorrow afternoon so will we see you both here?’
Before I could answer, Greg said, ‘My train is at four o’clock so of course we’ll manage a quick visit to Rosie and John.’ He turned to me and smiled.
Dad said, ‘I’ll have to spend the entire morning going round everybody with the news. Starting with Alice and Granny and Grandad. They’ll be pleased it’s all over.’
They weren’t the only ones, I thought, and I said a silent prayer, hoping Rosie and the baby were both well.
Greg came to Roseangle in the morning and we went for a walk along the Esplanade. The river was choppy with white-tipped waves and a strong easterly wind blowing from the North Sea.
‘I’d forgotten how cold it is up here, Ann,’ said Greg. ‘It’s been a lovely warm summer down in England.’
‘Do you like it down there, Greg?’ My heart was thumping.
He nodded. ‘Yes, I do. It’s a bit like Trinafour with the hills – all lovely green countryside in spite of not being far from London. I also enjoy my work.’
‘I see.’
He pulled me close. ‘I don’t want to stay down there, Ann. If you’re not with me, that is. I want to be where you are.’
I was suddenly happy again as that cold finger of fear slowly dissolved in my mind. It was just my imagination that I was losing him – at least I hoped so.
The afternoon found us heading once more up the infirmary brae to join the long queue of visitors.
Because the visiting rules stated that only two visitors were allowed per bed, Dad and Lily set off for the maternity ward first. Lily was carrying a huge bunch of flowers that Connie had managed to get in her usual way. Greg and I sat in the now familiar waiting room.
‘What kind of work do you do, Greg?’
He gave it some thought. ‘It’s all a bit hush-hush. It’s just like working in an office but it’s with the government. I sometimes curse this gammy leg of mine – I could have been in the army or air force by now.’
Greg’s bad leg was due to a fall from a horse when he was a child. In fact, I’d first met him in this infirmary. Maddie had been doing her nursing training and she asked me to visit this lonely patient who lived far from home and didn’t get many visitors.
‘But you’re still doing a good job, Greg. It’s just as important as being on the battlefield.’
‘Yes, well … maybe …’ He sounded doubtful. ‘Has there been any more word about Danny?’
I shook my head sadly. ‘Nothing except for the letter from the Red Cross but at least Maddie knows he’s alive and that’s a blessing.’
Then Dad and Lily arrived back from the ward and handed us the two visiting tickets.
Rosie was sitting up in bed and she looked tired and pl
eased at the same time. She smiled when she saw us.
‘How’s the baby, Rosie? How’s John?’
Her face lit up. ‘He’s a braw wee lad, Ann! He was nine pounds and one ounce and he’s gorgeous.’
Even this simple statement seemed to take its toll and she lay back on the pillows. Still, her colouring was all right and it was only to be expected that she would be tired.
She managed to say a few words to Greg, apologising for taking me away his visit. ‘And I hear that silly man of mine got the wrong train time.’
Greg laughed. ‘Well, he did have a lot on his mind, Rosie.’
I gave her hand a squeeze. ‘Well done, Rosie. Now we’ll get away to let Dad have the rest of the visiting hour with you and I’ll see you later in the week.’
We took Lily with us to let Dad stay with his wife and new son. We set off for the station, picking up Greg’s small suitcase from Victoria Road on the way.
As usual, the station was full of people and we didn’t have much time to speak. Lily went and sat in the buffet with a glass of lemonade while we said our goodbyes.
As the train drew into the station, Greg whispered, ‘The next leave I get will be with a special licence to get married.’ He laughed. ‘Now mind and keep it free!’
The train pulled out of the station and I shouted after him, ‘I promise, Greg – cross my heart!’
He called back, ‘I’ll hold you to that promise!’
Once again, I watched as he departed from my life. A few hours together, a lot of goodbyes then a parting – what a life!
Lily was still in the buffet and I sat down beside her with a cup of tea.
‘Are you excited about Rosie’s baby?’ I asked her.
Her face lit up. ‘Oh, I am, Ann, and his full name is John Alexander Young Neill. The Alexander Young is from Rosie’s side of the family,’ she informed me.
Welcome to the world, little John Alexander Young Neill, I thought. With a name that long, he had to be a success.
The Sun Will Shine Tomorrow Page 6
