We stay like that for what seems like hours, staring into each other’s eyes, almost like she’s gauging my interest. Slightly leaning forward, I lick the seam of her slightly parted satin lips. When her dainty fingers skim their way up my stomach, chest, shoulders and finally finding a resting place in my hair, I’m officially lost. Stick a fork in me, I’m done.
Grabbing the underside of her leg, I hoist her thigh even further up my body and bring my hips to meet hers. Even through my sleep pants and her shorts, I can feel her arousal. Sounds of wet, sloppy kisses fill the room. Each time she tugs on the back of my hair, my thrusts become more determined. Every time I swallow one of her soft moans, my hand on her leg becomes more aggressive.
Rolling our bodies until Briar’s under me, I situate myself between her parted legs and move my lips down her jaw. She sits up too quickly, nearly causing our heads to collide, and rips her tank top over her head, throwing it aimlessly across the room.
“Please, Dex, it’s been so long,” she cries, bucking her hips into mine. With our upper bodies bared to one another, I lay my body down on top of hers, dragging my fingers through her hair. Losing myself in her hazed-with-lust eyes, I meet her lips again, this time softly and with purpose, forgetting about the sloppy, needy kisses from only moments earlier.
Moving my way down her body, I pause at her tits that are fuller since we were last together. I bury my face between them, relishing in the softness, letting my hands slide down to her waist, hooking my fingers into the waistband of her shorts. Inching down the bed, she raises her lower half, giving me access to peel the fabric from her legs.
Suddenly it hits me.
This is Briar. This isn’t some random girl I’ve picked up and I don’t care if I ever see again. This is one of the only people I can count on. Someone that I would be lost without.
I let my head fall to her stomach, my shoulders sag and I sigh loudly enough to draw her attention.
“Dex, what’s wrong?” she whispers breathlessly, sitting up and running her fingers through my hair.
“I can’t. I’m sorry.”
I lift myself off of her body, resting on my calves, hands on my knees. Flopping back on the bed, she covers her eyes with her arms and groans.
“I’m gonna go sleep in the guest room.” Sliding off the edge of the bed, I pause at the doorway before I walk out, turning to get one more glimpse of the girl I can never have because I’m not man enough for her.
Briar rolls on her side, pulling the blanket up to her chest. It’s quite possible I’ve fucked this up enough that it’ll never be the same.
Taking the few short steps to the guest room, I lie on the bed facing the ceiling. Tomorrow will be better. I’ll head out for the UK shoot, giving us some distance before we have to be in the same room again. We can fix this. We’ve been together before and were able to salvage a relationship.
But that was different.
Shit, tonight was different.
I didn’t want to fuck Briar. I wanted to make love to her, as corny as that sounds. I wanted to be so deep inside of her that I could feel the vibrations of her moans reverberating through her body. I wanted to be inside her head. Her heart.
Yeah, I need to forget about this, and hopefully she will, too. I can’t lose her and Katie; they’re all I have left.
Distance will make it better. Fucking a new girl will take away the sting. I’m only feeling this way because I have blue balls. Once I’m nine inches deep in some British girl, begging me for more in her sexy accent, all will be right with the world.
Waking up the next morning is more difficult than I could have imagined. Even without seeing Briar, I know there’s going to be some unresolved tension in the air. Hopefully, it won’t affect my goodbyes and we can part on good terms.
Climbing out of bed, I dress in casual traveling clothes and pack my stuff away. I usually like to take a shower before I board a plane, but the thought of being in Briar’s room and bathroom for a long period of time leaves a sense of unease lingering in my head. I’ll more than likely pick up new toiletries on the road just so I don’t have to go in there.
Stepping out into the living room, Katelynn’s sitting on the floor, in front of the TV, eating a bowl of cereal and watching whatever cartoon’s playing on the screen. I drop my bag just outside the foyer and plop down next to her on the floor.
“I gotta get back to work. I’ll come see you again soon,” I say, leaning over to kiss the top of her head.
“Can I go with you? Mommy said you’re going to London. I’ve never been there before. I can be your assistant and help with the camera.”
“As wonderful as that sounds, I think it’s better that you stay behind and take care of your mom. Plus, I think she’d miss you if you were gone too long.”
“Yeah. I know. I’d miss her, too. Someday, though, I’m gonna be a model so I can travel all around like Mommy used to do.”
“How about this? When I come back in a few weeks, I’ll take some pictures of you—if that’s okay with your mom—and I’ll see if I know of any clothing lines that are looking for a beautiful, five-year-old model to show off their back to school line.”
“Dex,” Briar calls, interrupting my conversation with Katie. The tone of her voice…I don’t like it. I’m kind of hoping I’ve overstepped a boundary with Katelynn and this isn’t some kind of residual frustration from the events of last night.
“I’ll see you soon, Angel,” I say, standing up and walking into the kitchen where Briar’s waiting, a scowl on her face. “What’s up?” I ask.
“Don’t you think that it would be appropriate to, I don’t know, ask her mother before you start offering modeling contracts to my child? She’s not cut out for this industry. She’s too kind and sweet.”
“I’m sorry if I went about it the wrong way, but you’re kind and sweet, too. This business didn’t ruin you; in fact, you did exceptionally well for the few years you were really into it. Or have you forgotten?”
“I didn’t forget anything. I gave up a lot to get it. I don’t want that for her.”
“You were barely eighteen when you got your first gig. You got out of Indiana, which is what you said you always wanted. What exactly did you give up?”
A rose color tints her cheeks and she turns away, pouring more coffee in her mug that’s still nearly full. Adding more cream and sugar, then stirring absentmindedly with a small spoon, she peeks up at me through her lashes, fresh tears lining her bottom lids. “Do I really have to say it?”
“What the hell are you talking about?”
“You, Dex. I had to give you up. There was no way I’d be able to travel as much as I did while trying to keep our relationship alive. You wouldn’t have lasted. You would have cheated and then we wouldn’t be close like we are now. I gave you up.”
That can’t be what she honestly thinks. We parted ways on a mutual agreement. I wasn’t hurt or broken hearted about it. I knew it was for the best. For both of us. Mostly her, and not because I wouldn’t have been faithful to her. Screwing someone else when I had her was the furthest thing in my mind. I knew, even way back then, that I was fucked up. I wouldn’t have been good in a relationship because I didn’t believe in them. I still don’t.
“Come here,” I say, opening my arms and coaxing her into them. When she reaches me, I envelop her, rubbing her back. “We broke up because you needed more and I couldn’t give it to you. You made a life for yourself. Found a man who loved you like you loved him and created that beautiful little angel in the other room. Nothing was a mistake, Briar. Last night was a moment of weakness on my part. I’m sorry that I took advantage of you and I wish I could take it back. You’re my best friend and I don’t want to lose you, or Katie.”
Finally, she wraps her arms around my waist, burying her nose in my chest and inhaling. “Don’t be sorry. That was me. I’ve just been so lonely lately. I trust you. Always have. I guess I thought I needed some companionship and you wouldn’t hurt me. I�
��m so damn sorry, Dex. I don’t want this to come between us. Now that Erik’s gone, you’re all Katie and I have, too. Do you forgive me?” Again, those blue eyes connect with mine, begging for understanding. I get it. I do.
“Let’s just brush it under the rug as a screw up on both of our parts. I know what you need, and I’d be willing to give it to you, but I won’t. I can’t risk what we have now. You’re too important to me. This means too much.”
“Agreed,” she says, squeezing me one final time before letting go and grabbing her mug. “You go to work. We’re here if you want to visit when you’re done. Don’t worry about anything; I’ll be fine. Have a safe trip.”
She smiles sweetly, takes a sip of coffee and heads to the living room with Katie. Feeling like we’ve resolved whatever tension was left from last night, I grab my bag and say one final goodbye as I’m heading out the door. At the curb, the car Nicholas arranged is waiting for me, with a message from Nick himself, stating that he’ll meet me in London.
And just like that, life’s getting back to normal. Well, as normal as my life can be.
*****
The flight to London was pretty uneventful. A little turbulence and a beautiful flight attendant that was more interested in me introducing her to the Mile High Club than filling my drink, but all in all, it was smooth sailing. Or flying? You know what I mean. I only wish I was in a state of mind that I could have accommodated her wishes, but unfortunately for her, my thoughts were still back in New York.
I did receive the email from the magazine I’ll be shooting for this week—complete with all the details and my arrangements. The compensation for this job isn’t all that great, but I’m sure they already knew I was being dropped from every other schedule around the globe and scooped me up when they saw the opening. I can’t blame them, really. In their shoes, I would have probably done the exact same thing.
Business is business, no matter how cut throat you have to be.
I do have a huge perk, though. They’re going to be putting me up at one of the finest hotels. Who knows? I might actually bring a woman back there, seeing as there’s no need to be conservative about my affairs.
True to his word, Nicholas is waiting at the airport to pick me up. I enjoyed my time with Briar and Katie, minus the shit show last night, but Nicholas is one of my few male friends and it’s been a while since we’ve hung out. Hopefully, London won’t disappoint. He and I are in for a good night on the town, and what better town than this.
“Did you have a good week off?” Nicholas asks, taking my bag and loading it in the trunk of the car.
“It was nice. I haven’t gotten to spend that much consecutive time with the girls. I’ll probably head back there for a few days when we’re done here.”
“Wait? Dexter MacFadden’s going to go home to a woman … and child…when he’s done with work? What’s happened to you, man? Did you grow a pussy while you were gone, too?”
This is what I’ve missed. Crude language. It’s more difficult than you’d think to watch every word that comes out of your mouth when you’re around a little girl. It’s fucked up, but the freedom to say the word pussy … it’s liberating.
“Speaking of pussy, the shoot’s not until tomorrow. Should we go scout for some talent?” I ask, raising a brow.
“Ladies and gentlemen. No need to worry. All’s right in the universe. Dexter MacFadden’s packed away his vagina and reattached his dick. Women of London, watch out, Dex’s on the prowl.”
Both of us get in the car and head to the hotel. Nicholas pulls into the valet section when we arrive and just the exterior of the hotel screams elegance. Putting our bags on the bellhop’s cart, we walk through the turnstile door. The interior of this place—I mean, just the lobby has a level of luxury that you wouldn’t see anywhere in the United States. Oversized, plush red velvet chairs set up around a mahogany table, a long, winding staircase leading to the second floor, and the smell of old money are the first things to hit me.
I’m really going to enjoy my stay. If they put this much into first impressions, I can’t wait to see what the suite looks like.
Nicholas takes the lead, checking in with the concierge and getting the key to the two bedroom suite the magazine’s reserved for us during our stay. When we make it to the room, the bellhop isn’t far behind with our luggage. Nicholas takes care of the tip while I scan the room.
The living space very closely resembles the main lobby we just came from. The two doors on opposite walls, which must be the bedrooms, have the most intricate carvings on them, leading me to believe they were salvaged when the hotel was remodeled, because everything else lends more of a modern feel. I choose the door to the left while Nicholas takes the one on the right.
Opening the door, I’m in awe. If I were to ever own a home, this is what I’d expect my bedroom to look like. A four poster, king-sized bed, an entry into the en-suite that even has a garden tub and stand up shower, but it’s the view that’s the most beautiful part.
Pulling my camera from the bag, I walk to the window that overlooks London. After snapping a few pictures—a few on my camera and some on my phone—I stand back and enjoy the scenery. Even though the weather isn’t that great, London makes overcast look sensational. I make a mental note to have Nicholas schedule some time away so I can go shoot the countryside.
Briar would absolutely love this.
No. No more Briar. Not for this week, anyway. This is my time to recharge and wash off any of those feelings I might have brought with me from New York. It’s time for me to reclaim my man card, as Nicholas so eloquently put it earlier.
Immediately after unpacking my bag, I take a quick shower and dress for a night out—black dress pants, grey button-up shirt, the sleeves rolled to my elbows, and a gray wool jacket to go over top. I’m tying the lace on my shoe when Nicholas knocks on the door.
“Come in,” I holler, buttoning my jacket and checking my appearance in the mirror.
“You ready? I spoke with one of the doormen, and he said there’s a badass club just around the corner.”
“Let’s do it.”
Nicholas and I stroll out of the room, head downstairs and out into the night. Nearly forgetting that I haven’t eaten yet today, I pull Nicholas into a small deli down the block from the hotel to grab a small bite to eat. It wouldn’t be much fun to be a sloppy drunk, and that’s exactly what would happen if I tried to consume alcohol on an empty stomach.
When we arrive at the club, the bass from the speakers is vibrating through my body before the bouncer even opens the door. Once inside, the air is charged with sexual energy as the music pours into the room. Scantily dressed women are congregating in every corner of the room; however, most are on the dance floor, swaying to the hypnotic beats.
This is exactly what I need to take my mind off last night with Briar.
Immediately spotting a sexy brunette wearing an off the shoulder red dress and a tiara, I nod at Nicholas, letting him know I’ve found my prey for the evening.
Now, I’ve just got to get her back to my room. This’ll be a first for me, but there’s no way in Hell I’ll be sleeping in some girl’s flat when I have the Egyptian cotton sheets waiting back at the hotel for me.
“You wanna get out of here?” I ask after finishing the third round of martinis.
It doesn’t take very much convincing for her to want to leave with me. Unlike any other woman before, I played the hand I’ve been dealt and it’s freeing. No hiding my identity or my profession. As soon as she heard I was the Dexter MacFadden, playboy photographer, I almost had to pry her off my dick.
“I thought you’d never ask,” she slurs, obviously having had more than the few drinks I purchased for her this evening. Hey, I’m not complaining.
Offering my arm, bent at the elbow, she accepts and we head toward the coat check. From my rather short conversation with Ella—or is it Emma—I don’t fucking know, but I’ve learned that tonight she’s out celebrating her recent divorc
e from some kind of finance mogul. After four long, painful years of marriage, she decided to call it quits after she found him having an affair with the housekeeper.
I’m more excited about the fact that I’ve found a woman that’s not going to want anything more from me other than the one night she’s about to get. Coming off a marriage, this chick’s just looking for a dick to cozy up inside of her. My kind of night. Right up my alley.
I send a quick text to Nicholas that I’m leaving, but he doesn’t have to follow just yet. He’s not officially on duty until tomorrow morning, so I’ll let him have a night of fun, too. Ella, or Emma, and I walk arm in arm the few short blocks to my hotel—yes, another first for —me—well I walk, she kind of leans on me for support as to not fall over in the excessively high heeled shoes she’s wearing.
“You’re staying here?” she asks in awe, sizing up the hotel. Between her gorgeous face and sexy accent, even if it’s a little slurred, it’s killing me. I need to get her upstairs fast.
“Yes, I am. Come on, I’m staying on the twentieth floor. I have an impeccable view of the city.”
Once inside the lobby, I remove my arm from hers and place my palm on the small of her back, directing her toward the bank of elevators. When the doors close and the light at the top starts flashing as we ascend, the tension’s palpable and I’m closely watching the numbers, wishing this damn thing would hurry up.
“Come here, Twix,” I command, her eyes questioning me while she licks her ruby painted lips.
“Twix?”
I give her the spiel about sweetness and candy, something that none of the women I’ve encountered, including this one, can resist. It’s a stupid name—something that I came up with on a whim one night when I forgot my partner’s name—and the one thing that popped in my head was a Twix candy bar, the same one that was sitting on the nightstand of her apartment. Since that day, they’ve all become Twix. Using a pet name, even as moronic as a piece of chocolate, is better than calling her the wrong name, and let’s be honest … I can’t remember this girl’s name.
Calling Card Page 6
