by Am Hudson
His stomach sunk with laughter and his hands cupped my face as I buried it in his ribs. “Stop. That actually tickles.”
“A ticklish vampire, huh?” I grinned wildly.
“Don’t you dare,” he warned, readying his open hands to stop me.
“And what if I do dare?” I said, getting up onto my knees. “Will you punish me?”
His adoring eyes appraised my naked form, brushing slowly over my long hair and around the curve of my breast before stopping on the small bump protruding from my midsection. He got up on one elbow and spread a hand firmly over my belly. “I think any punishing will have to wait until you’ve had the baby. I’m not sure I can do bad things to you again when I know my daughter is sleeping peacefully right inside here.”
I lay both my hands over his, holding him there so he couldn’t move away. And any lustful feelings I had a few minutes ago slipped away as Baby awoke and had a stretch, lifting our hands with her tiny limbs.
David just smiled, shaking his head. “I will never get over how amazing that is.”
“And what’s even more amazing is that we made her.”
Outside, the signs of predawn changed the sky, and the raging winds receded a little. I looked to the farthest my eye could see and watched the treetops slowly appear from the blackness as Baby and David bonded through layers of flesh. He found her tiny life so amazing that he could forget all our problems and focus only on the miracle. But I just wasn’t so good at forgetting the inevitable.
“David?”
“Yes, my love.” He looked up from Bump, his smile dropping when our eyes met. “What’s wrong?”
“I’m sorry. But I just can’t spend the day with you—I need to speak to Lilith today.”
He moved his hand off my skin and sat up.
“I need answers,” I explained. “Hope. And if we go bury Eve’s crux, or take a walk or even try to have a conversation, all I’m going to think about is this life you and I could have if everything were okay.”
His lips pressed into a thin smile and he nodded. “I understand.”
“But?”
“No buts.” He put both hands up, then laid back on the pillows with a huff. “Just go. Get it over with, and then—” He rolled up a little and took my hand. “Come back here and spend the rest of the morning in bed with me.”
“Okay.” I shuffled back. “I promise.”
He held onto my hand a bit tighter as I tried to get up, only letting go once my feet were on the floor.
“I’ll be back soon,” I promised, and turned toward the sitting room.
“Where are you going? Your velvet cloak’s on the hatstand by the door.” He pointed to the red cape Jason gave me.
“I’m not walking naked today.” I backed away toward my wardrobe.
“What about the whole respect for Nature thing?”
“I respect Nature enough not to wear shoes in a sacred place. But that’s as far as it goes this morning.”
David just grinned to himself as he laid back with his hands behind his head.
***
I walked among the bony, naked trees of the forest, feet bare, jeans and a red wool coat keeping me and my bump warm. Lilith had questions to answer, and today I came here dressed as her equal—not her servant.
“Lilith!” I demanded, coming upon the clearing around the black rock. The birds stopped singing as I entered the sacred circle, and the trees all seemed to drop what few leaves they had left, retreating into sudden hibernation for the coming winter. I headed straight to the Stone of Truth, where its power radiated like a space heater into the cold autumn air. My fingertips had gone stark white in the dawn chill, and a fine sprinkle of rain had left my hair in tight ringlets, but in the glowing warmth by the rock all my agony, my fears, my heartache, bled away into the earth. I could feel the energy of a thousand spirits—hear their whispers as they talked to me from the other side. But none of what they were saying ever made any sense.
“Lilith!” I called again. “I need to speak with you. Now!”
A soft pink glow reflected off the rock like sunlit water. I turned around to see her beautiful, ghostly form on the pathway up ahead—outside the aura of the Stone. “Use your words wisely, young queen,” she said. “For I may have been patient with you thus far, but I will not tolerate disrespect in my own home.”
I marched over, my fists by my sides, taking a quick breath as the cold outside the rock’s warmth shocked me. “You knew all along, didn’t you?”
Her blue eyes moved onto my belly. “I’ve known only since she was conceived.”
“And that’s why you wanted me to be with Jason? Because he—”
“With Jason’s soul in that child, there will be no hope of using his seed to reincarnate Anandene.”
“So you just want him gone—dead?”
“It is for the best.”
I folded my arms. “I won’t do it. I won’t let him die.”
“And how do you hope to prevent it?” she challenged.
“I’ll give my soul to the child.”
Lilith’s face turned to stone, her eyes shrinking into angry slits. “You would not be so stupid.”
“It wouldn’t be stupid,” I said.
“You would be giving them another chance to restore Anandene.”
“Then what do you expect me to do?” I held both hands out in question. “You know me, Lilith. Did you really think I’d let Jason or my daughter die?”
“You weren’t supposed to know she would be soulless.” She floated past me to face the Stone. “Your father was supposed to talk to Jason—convince him to offer his own life—and then take it before you ever laid eyes on that child.”
“My dad’s in on this?!” I grabbed her arm to make her face me, but my hand went right through her.
“He is not in on anything. He acts now to protect the human race—from Anandene. If you ever thought he would take sides, Amara—” she angled her head back and looked down at me with a very smug grin, “—you were the fool.”
“How could he do this to me?” I asked myself. “All this time, all along, he meant to betray me.”
Her body slowly turned, her arms folded across her waist. “What you are too young and naïve to realise is that he’s protecting you. He has been all along.”
“Then he needs to help me find a way to save my daughter—and the twins, because I won’t stop, Lilith.” I stood my ground, holding her gaze. “You know I won’t. I will die first.”
She closed her eyes. “And I see that future for you, young Auress. If you persist on your own, you will die for her. And all I see that occurs after is… darkness.”
“I wish I cared. But I don’t. I’m sorry. I just won’t let anyone else I love die.”
“Amara—” She opened her eyes again. “Believe it or not, I feel the same way about you. I cannot risk you giving up your life—”
“It doesn’t have—”
“So I will help you,” she spoke over the top of me. “But my help comes at a price.”
“What price?”
From within the fold of her arm, she raised one hand and presented a plain, pale yellow apple.
“Food?” I said. “How is that supposed to help me? I’m not hungry! I’m angry!”
She smiled, turning the apple in her fingertips. “If you bite from the Fruit of Wisdom, you will know then how to save Jason.”
“So there is a way?” I looked at the apple, wetting my lips. “I can save him, and the baby?”
“And your husband.” She offered the apple. “Even yourself.”
As I went to take the fruit from her hand, she drew it back.
“There is, however, something you must do for me first.”
“Anything,” I said eagerly. “I’ll do anything.”
“I know.” The apple vanished then as she slipped it into the folds of her ghostly dress. “Before you take from the knowledge of gods, you must confess your sins to your husband—show him what you did wi
th his brother and then…” Her deep, eerie eyes sharpened with an evil grin. “Tell him what you did with his uncle.”
My blood ran cold. “Why? What good will that possibly do?”
“His reaction will tell me what I need to know.”
“And what, exactly, is that?”
“My dear Amara. You are of my blood—a direct descendant of the first female. What you do now will echo through the ages and one day shape the lives of your ancestors. I must be sure that the man you choose to walk beside is worthy of the woman you have become and the goddess you will one day be.”
“The what now?” I took a step closer and stared right into her eyes, face to face, as equals, for the first time. “So it’s true—that I…?”
“Because you are an Auress—a Guardian of the Stone,” she said, staring right back into me like a light down a tunnel. “You will one day be powerful enough to take your place among the gods; accept your role as Seeker of The Lost.”
“The Lost?”
“Those who do not reincarnate, forever left wandering the Fog of Purgatory.”
“And… what exactly will be in my job description?”
“In the Valley of the Dead, by use of the Cerulean Light, you will find those lost among the fog, and with your great and unearthly empathy, you will connect with them—lead them step-by-step back to the Rivers of Life—give them a chance to be reborn.”
“And who does this now? I mean, will I take over from someone, or—”
“Until now, immortal souls, lost in death for their sins on earth, have remained so. But when you were born, a pulse went out into the Realm of Spirits and an unnatural disquiet settled over the dead. We hear them under that silence now—the immortal souls—they cry out, lost, eternally seeking their mates. And until they are brought back to await rebirth, we will not know peace.”
“So, I caused it—this… disquiet?”
“You are a rare Cerulean Entity—a light among the dark. Your very existence fuels hope in the lost. It is your life’s purpose to break the chains of the suffering—to love the unloveable. To find good in the bad.”
“I thought I was here to end this contract.”
She moved her head to say no. “Your soul’s past may carry you down one path, but your heart walks another. You are not something we could have designed or predicted. You are an accident, or perhaps a miracle of Nature.”
“And that’s why you can’t risk losing me?”
“It is.”
“Then I guess you better give me that apple.” I put my hand out. “Now.”
That same knowing smile presented itself again as she faded in the light of the morning sun. “It will not be that easy. Talk to your husband,” she said, echoing as she faded to nothing.
***
“David!” I burst in through the bedroom door, almost tripping over an empty packing box.
“Whoa.” He laughed, looking up as he closed his nightstand drawer. “Take it easy.”
“Lilith has an answer for me,” I said, scrambling across the bed to his side. “And no one has to die—not even Jason.”
“Seriously?”
I nodded eagerly.
He popped his bottom lip over his top one and nodded to himself. “Well, that’s great. So what’s the answer?”
“Well, she’ll give me the object that’ll help me find the answer if I first tell you something I don’t want to tell you,” I said, toning down the excitement a little, realising only now that I’d once again become the pawn in her game of strategy.
David’s arched brow appraised me. “I’m assuming here that it’s something… bad you have to tell me?”
“Yes.”
“Okay.” His eyes narrowed and he looked off to one side. “So, she’s… what, trying to pit us against each other?”
“I think so.”
He laughed, his eyes squared with interest. “So what’s this thing you don’t wanna tell me?”
I folded my lips into a thin line, tossing the words around inside my mouth.
“Must be bad if she’s bribing you to tell me,” he said with a light, rather humoured tone.
“You should probably sound a little more concerned.”
“Why?” He shrugged. “Nothing you tell me will make me hate you again.”
The muscles in my brow showed my disbelief.
“Ara.” He placed both hands on my upper arms and looked deep into my eyes. “You have my express, unconditional forgiveness for whatever it is.”
“That simple, huh?”
“That simple.”
“You’re going to be sorry you said that.” I popped the black buttons on my red coat open as I sat down on the blanket box. “She also wants me to show you what happened with Jason and I that night—all of it.”
He sat beside me. “Why don’t we wait then—just for the day?” He sat beside me and stopped my hand atop my buttons. “Let’s go out to Winter Falls—take a picnic. Spend the day together before we dump another load of worries on our shoulders.”
“But I need that apple, David. I—”
“And you can have it. Tomorrow.” He squeezed my hand, looking down at it for a moment in surprise when he squashed my engagement ring. “When you show me those memories, Ara, it’s going to hurt. I know that. It’ll hurt us both, and I just want to enjoy now—the now we have before all of that.”
As much as my inner protective mother wanted assurance for my child’s future, the free-spirited girl in love with David wanted one last day in the sun with him before the shadows of my past regrets came flooding in to darken the dawn.
“Fine,” I said decisively. “A whole day not stressing or worrying about any of it.”
He stood up and offered his hand. “We’d better get ready then, and get out of here before Walter calls us to duty.”
“Oh, that’s right,” I said with a pout. “It’s Court day.”
David’s lip shifted sideways in his ultra-cheeky secret grin, blessing the morning with that dimple. “Not if they can’t find us.”
***
On the opposite side of Loslilian Island, a few miles from the bridge leading to the mainland, there are the remains of a river that once flowed throughout these lands, trickling down into the rocky depths of what once was a deep well. Only half of the rock wall survived the centuries, leaving the crystal clear water deep by the falls and shallow along the grass, like the ocean meeting the sand.
Leafy trees popped up around the banks in the last hundred years, giving the lake at Winter Falls the privacy it needed—being the skinny-dipping spot it had become. And it was an unspoken rule that if someone was here before you, you come back later.
The indecisive sky meant that we had no competition, though. The lake was all ours for the day and, luckily, we hadn’t yet met the rain.
On the rug beside David’s outstretched legs, the picnic basket lay untouched. I looked at it a few times, considering a sandwich, but from the moment I laid my head in his lap and his hands tangled softly in my warm hair, nothing in this world mattered. Not even hunger.
Although this place was nothing like David’s lake, it was still just so nice to lie in the pale sun by the water with him again. He seemed so light and so animated without that spell weighing him down, and nothing—not the future to come, not the past, nor the deaths of all those children—seemed to get in the way of the simple pleasure of a lover’s company. Everything he said was expressed with his hands, his smile and his bright eyes. I could see his teeth every time he talked because he hadn’t stopped smiling all morning. And I just watched in amazement as this man I once only thought was a dream awakened inside him and came to the surface—finally free to just ‘be’. David-in-love had to be just about the most beautiful thing in the world. I could see now why people in his vampire community said he’d changed so much just after he met me. And I could see how people had easily been confused over the years about which twin was the evil one. He could be mean and cold, but if there wasn’t
anything breaking his heart, he was just a kid—only nineteen and so free of cares that one could mistake him as human.
“What?” he asked, frowning at my probably very goofy smile.
I moved one shoulder up to my ear. “You’re just so beautiful when you’re happy.”
He looked away shyly, his eyes coming back with a small guard up, and then he swept his curled fingertip over my cheek. “And you, my love, are immaculate in this light. I see what they mean when they say ‘pregnancy glow’.”
This time I looked away shyly.
Overhead, a few small dots of rain left the wispy grey clouds and sprinkled down onto the rug beside us. I put my hand over them, rubbing my fingers against my palm to dry them away.
“Do you think we should go back now?” I asked.
“Back to the manor, or back to the past?”
A hard lump formed in my throat. I swallowed it down. “Are you ready for me to show you?”
He drew a long breath in through his nose. “No.” He exhaled it. “But you have no choice, do you?”
I shook my head against his legs. If I spoke, I’d have no way of controlling my tears. He would just be so disappointed in me when I told him what I did with Arthur. That loving look in his eye right now—the one I remember from when we were kids at school—I’d missed it so much. I just wasn’t ready to let it go.
As I sat up to begin my epic tale of lust and betrayal, the raindrops broke through the final layer of cloud and smacked the rug hard, bouncing up for a second before blending with the next drop. It came down fast then, like a flood of water dropped from cupped hands, making rivers down my eyes and beside my nose and adding weight to my coat and my jeans before soaking right through them.
David grabbed the guitar and held it over our heads, and I just laughed, pushing it away.
“There’s not much point now.” I motioned to our arms and legs. “We’re completely wet.”
He squinted up at the glowing white sun, blinking off the rain. “That just came out of nowhere.”
“No it didn’t.” I stood up and nodded to the wispy grey clouds. “It’s been brewing up there for about half an hour.”
